Katie and Travis 5: Baby Makes Three

[gobucks]

I am trying to give them a little grace since Katie ended up fainting and in the ER since delivery. Maybe Travis is keeping his eye on Katie and his mom is taking turns with Hailey. Another part of me just thinks they are spoiled and have it made, since neither are working outside the home anyways!

[JDuggs]

I breastfed my three kids over twenty years ago, and from what I remember, I was up at least once, probably a couple of times, to feed them every night at this stage. If I waited too long, I was painfully engorged and I never took to pumping. My postpartum health was good and my babies weren’t exceptionally challenging, so I was lucky, but also sleep deprived.

I don’t think I’m shaming them, but they are fortunate. In my experience, I don’t think the majority of people I know had overnight help. But maybe some people kept that information to themselves too.  I understand how this would be helpful to Katie since she’s dealing with her own health issues. I’m sure Travis’s mother is happy to be helping out, but she is a young grandmother who doesn’t appear to work outside the home. If one of my three kids, who are all older than Travis and Katie, had a baby, I couldn’t help out like that because I’m working and will still be working five years from now. And I’m probably ten years older than Travis’s mom.

 

[SassyPants]

57 minutes ago, CanadianMamam said:

I mean, most people I know had kids late enough that their parents were retired and were able to help out.

Katie posted that she might need to supplement because Hailey wasn't gaining and then never updated.

You can breastfeed and still miss a feeding. Your boobs will be heavier but your body will thank you. 

Travis has been doing all the driving and stuff and taking care of Katie and Hailey. I am not going to shame them for accepting the help they are offered, especially if Hailey is a fussy baby. 

 

Well maybe in other countries people are retired before they become GPs, but I would not say that is necessarily the norm in the states. Our daughter was 27 and her husband 36 when their daughter was born. My husband and I were both 56. Most people in the US are not retired by 56. Unfortunately, I did end up retiring because my daughter was very sick postpartum and did need help as she was hospitalized twice and had surgery in the first 3 months.

30 minutes ago, gobucks said:

I am trying to give them a little grace since Katie ended up fainting and in the ER since delivery. Maybe Travis is keeping his eye on Katie and his mom is taking turns with Hailey. Another part of me just thinks they are spoiled and have it made, since neither are working outside the home anyways!

They definitely have a unique and favorable situation for young people starting a family.

[AussieKrissy]

Ok total judgment. That bow is a ducking joke. My eyes are rolling so hard lol 

[JermajestyDuggar]

14 minutes ago, AussieKrissy said:

Ok total judgment. That bow is a ducking joke. My eyes are rolling so hard lol 

She’s like, “what is this black monstrosity on my forehead?”

[CanadianMamam]

10 hours ago, SassyPants said:

Well maybe in other countries people are retired before they become GPs, but I would not say that is necessarily the norm in the states. Our daughter was 27 and her husband 36 when their daughter was born. My husband and I were both 56. Most people in the US are not retired by 56. Unfortunately, I did end up retiring because my daughter was very sick postpartum and did need help as she was hospitalized twice and had surgery in the first 3 months.

They definitely have a unique and favorable situation for young people starting a family.

I was 28 and my husband 31 and we were amongst the youngest of our friends to have kids. We have several friends who became parents the year they turned 40. 

My MIL was long retired by the time we had kids and my mom didn't retire until last year but she worked part time for several years  and my stepdad retired when my youngest was born. 

But yeah, having babies at 22 is different and they are very lucky that Travis's parents are able to help out so much. 

[Keys]

I’m currently 9 months postpartum with our first babe, and I’m really glad that Katie has help with nights because the sleep deprivation is absolutely brutal. Full stop. But I was also curious about how she was sleeping the whole night while breastfeeding. Newborns cluster feed a lot at night in the first few weeks and generally still need feeds every 2-4 hours overnight, at least. So even if I had help overnight, I still would have had to wake to feed at least a few times (plus engorgement is no joke). Katie said that she was breastfeeding and really wanted to continue doing so but that they may need to supplement because of Hailey’s slow weight gain. But then she said that Hailey gained appropriately and they wouldn’t need to supplement after all. But maybe she’s decided to now for other reasons (like rest). 

[Mama Mia]

15 hours ago, JDuggs said:

I breastfed my three kids over twenty years ago, and from what I remember, I was up at least once, probably a couple of times, to feed them every night at this stage. If I waited too long, I was painfully engorged and I never took to pumping. My postpartum health was good and my babies weren’t exceptionally challenging, so I was lucky, but also sleep deprived.

I don’t think I’m shaming them, but they are fortunate. In my experience, I don’t think the majority of people I know had overnight help. But maybe some people kept that information to themselves too.  I understand how this would be helpful to Katie since she’s dealing with her own health issues. I’m sure Travis’s mother is happy to be helping out, but she is a young grandmother who doesn’t appear to work outside the home. If one of my three kids, who are all older than Travis and Katie, had a baby, I couldn’t help out like that because I’m working and will still be working five years from now. And I’m probably ten years older than Travis’s mom.

 

When I had my kids I stayed with my mom for a few weeks after each time. She worked, she  was still in her 30’s with my first — 40’s with the rest. She helped out. I did the same with my daughters when my health allowed. Most people I know have something similar - a mom, or grandma or sister or Auntie or even Grandpa  who comes to help at least part-time. Very few of these relatives are retired. It’s not always overnight, if the place is too small or the parents don’t want it. 

[CanadianMamam]

She might still be nursing but her MIL is doing the rest of the care. When my second was born, my mom stayed for a few days and I handed her the baby after the fed and fell back asleep. Not all babies go back to sleep after eating, plus diaper changes, etc.

 

[SassyPants]

13 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

She’s like, “what is this black monstrosity on my forehead?”

I wonder if those hurt? I know if I wear anything like that, behind my ears gets irritated after awhile. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

I wonder if those hurt? I know if I wear anything like that, behind my ears gets irritated after awhile. 

I’m almost starting to prefer those ridiculous tiny bows of the 80s that were stuck to a bald baby girl’s head with corn syrup. 

[HereticHick]

A giant black bow? Does she have a funeral to attend?

[postscript]

Good lord, that bow. It looks like a giant black butterfly alighted on her forehead. And no way that elastic is comfortable. 

[Satan'sFortress]

17 hours ago, AussieKrissy said:

Ok total judgment. That bow is a ducking joke. My eyes are rolling so hard lol 

I am not a fan of the bow, but if I'm being honest, I would 100% wear that onesie if it came in my size.

On 3/14/2023 at 12:28 AM, gobucks said:

Hailey had her pedi appointment

Had to read this a couple of times before I realized it wasn't a pedicure appointment!  With fundies, you never know.

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, Satan'sFortress said:

I am not a fan of the bow, but if I'm being honest, I would 100% wear that onesie if it came in my size.

Had to read this a couple of times before I realized it wasn't a pedicure appointment!  With fundies, you never know.

I hated clipping newborn toenails! It gave me so much anxiety. I let them get kinda long before I would trim them with those tiny baby clippers 

[Alysabeth]

1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I hated clipping newborn toenails! It gave me so much anxiety. I let them get kinda long before I would trim them with those tiny baby clippers 

My husband once clipped our newborn babies finger and made it bleed (a tiny amount) when cutting his fingernails. Our son is now 4 and we also have a 10 month old but he’s refused to cut either of their nails since, it traumatised him too much 😅

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, Alysabeth said:

My husband once clipped our newborn babies finger and made it bleed (a tiny amount) when cutting his fingernails. Our son is now 4 and we also have a 10 month old but he’s refused to cut either of their nails since, it traumatised him too much 😅

It’s the worst feeling in the world when you feel like you’ve hurt your own tiny baby! I accidentally scratched my baby (it didn’t even draw blood) but I felt so bad I made sure to cut my nails very short after that. And I never accidentally scratched him again. 

[JDuggs]

Katie, Travis and Hailey are on their way to TN (flying). I don’t think I would make the choice to fly with a one month old baby on a plane or bring a new baby to meet 30 or so people. Katie was giving Hailey a bottle on the plane. They must know that flying is hard on a baby’s ears, I hope.

[EmiSue]

39 minutes ago, JDuggs said:

Katie, Travis and Hailey are on their way to TN (flying). I don’t think I would make the choice to fly with a one month old baby on a plane or bring a new baby to meet 30 or so people. Katie was giving Hailey a bottle on the plane. They must know that flying is hard on a baby’s ears, I hope.

I remember being advised not to fly with my oldest until after he'd gotten his 2-month shots. This was years before covid and NOT following a huge surge of flu and rsv. I can't imagine doing it right now with such a tiny baby.

[JermajestyDuggar]

I hate flying even when I’m by myself. I would hate flying with a newborn even more. How stressful. At least the plane ride is short from NJ to TN. I hope the baby was sleeping for most of it. 

[Keys]

I don’t think it’s talked about enough how vulnerable babies’ immune systems are in the first 3 months of life. Any fever, especially under one month, often requires a full septic work up including a lumbar puncture. Babies that young can get sick quickly. I certainly would not be flying with a baby so young, but I’m also biased as a healthcare worker who sees those sick babes. Really hope she doesn’t pick anything up. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I had one baby in October and one in January. I hated having newborns during cold and flu season. I remember wishing they were born in the spring. Therefore we didn’t go out much during cold and flu season. We went out more in spring and summer. 

[GuineaPigCourtship]

If we didn't bed share/cosleep I think the lack of sleep would have killed me.  There were times when she was up every 30 minutes to nurse for days and I could snatch quick cat naps between them because I had to go to work the next day.  I daydreamed about getting a night nanny.  She would never take a bottle if I was in the house, either, although I pumped obsessively for daycare.

I'm glad they have help because rested parents are more able to be present and patient.

[fluffernutter]

Weren't they recently in the hospital?! The earliest I flew PP was 12 weeks and that felt absolutely harrowing. 

[gobucks]

42 minutes ago, fluffernutter said:

Weren't they recently in the hospital?! The earliest I flew PP was 12 weeks and that felt absolutely harrowing. 

Yes! Katie fainted in the shower and had to go to the ER. I can't remember if that was this week's video or last week's.  She was borderline anemic but didn't get a transfusion. Hailey was jaundiced for a while but her numbers are better now.