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Showing content with the highest reputation since 12/29/2019 in all areas

  1. feministxtian

    Mills Family 5: YouTube Really Is Optional

    My grown son climbed into the bed with his dad and started trying to shake him awake, I'll never forget how hard he cried or how loud he yelled that his dad owed him at least another 20 years so he could see the achievements my son would reach. The hospice chaplain came in and put his hand on my son's shoulder while he cried. I've learned that reactions to death are irrational. Yes, it makes people uncomfortable, but life is messy, full of messy moments, not all moments of roses and violins in the background. Facing death is messy, it's not talked about because it IS messy. If you don't like what I say, feel free to scroll on, put me on ignore, whatever...I'm speaking MY truth to this situation. Its not a situation I'd ever care to repeat, but it is my reality, it happened.
  2. OyHiOh

    Mills Family 5: YouTube Really Is Optional

    Just saying . . . . the "death and dying are private" thing . . . . well that mentality leads to caregivers, friends/family, and people approaching death feeling incredibly isolated. Conversation, yes, in public forums like this one, about our experiences of living and death ease our own isolation and make death just a little easier for the next person whether facing their own or that of a loved one. Not everyone handles that conversation well (looking at you, Tom) but that doesn't mean we should not share details of experience and what we felt. For an hour after Mr Oy passed, I sat with my arms wrapped around one of his. I don't think anyone could have pried me away if they'd tried. A couple people I've told this to have said they thought it was a "weird" reaction. I tell that story because someone, eventually, is going to sit next to the bed of a loved one who just passed or is close to, and wonder if it's weird to sit the way I did. No, no it's not weird. It's only weird because we don't talk about our experiences of death out loud.
  3. So, let me get this straight, people are saying Lauren is distant/haughty/pouting/sad/stuck-up/drama filled/ because she is 1- Wearing a hat and is somewhat dressier on Christmas than most -not all- of the women around her and 2- Has her newborn baby off to the side in a very crowded and happily chaotic room filled with tons of happily loud people, including - unvaccinated kids, one of whom wound up hospitalized from a respiratory infection few days later alrighty then
  4. OyHiOh

    Kristen Nicole Young

    As regular readers know, my late husband died of flu last winter (H1N1 to be specific). He had his flu vax (standard flu has included H1N1 for six or eight years now) but had had broncitis for a week or so before flu exposure. Just too much for his body to handle. One of his ICU docs told me - at a point where we were cautiously optomistic - "unfortunately, flu is still a disease that kills." This year, my children, who normally protest any and all shots, were on my tail about flu vax's the second this year's batch came out. Doctor's office has a new nurse, who had no idea of the family history. You should have seen her face when my kids sat there quizzing her if the vax has H1N1 in it because "yeah, my dad died of H1N1 last year and I don't want to!!!!"
  5. HerNameIsBuffy

    Josiah and Lauren 16: Just Another Young Fundie Couple

    As someone whose personality has never said anything close to, welcome let's be friends I personally don't think people who have that are always what they are cracked up to be. Some of the most outgoing, gregarious, friendly people I've known have been wonderful and truly genuine and kind and others...that's all there is. Superficial friendliness because everyone has to like them always and those people exhaust the hell out of me. Everything you've said about Lauren here has been said about me my entire life. People who don't know me well see aloof, stuck up, and the word when it's been brought up at work in the past was "unapproachable." And I absolutely have a genuine air of "don't talk to me" much of the time, but it has nothing to do with superiority and everything to do with the fact that I probably just don't want to talk to you. I don't know her and I don't watch the show, just pointing out that people who are more reserved get these exact criticisms leveled at them all the time...and from childhood throughout their lives. But reserved people can also be fun, warm, loving people to those with whom we're comfortable...but you're probably never going to see the depth of that on camera or in a crowd of extended family or acquaintances.
  6. SilverBeach

    JinJer 51: Can't Even Sell Donuts!

    APOLOGIZING IN ADVANCE FOR THE WALL OF TEXT Black woman from a poor dysfunctional family here. I was accepted into a highly competitive university, and I graduated. I followed the money when deciding to attend this private university. This is a very well-endowed school and if they wanted you, they made it work financially. It cost less than going to a public university! I would never say that no smart and capable kids from low income schools are ever going to Harvard or any other elite/highly competitive university. I personally went to high school with many from the poorest housing projects that went on to four year colleges, if not elite universities. There are doctors, lawyers, engineers, entrepreneurs, and other successes among them. Some poor parents care enough, and value education enough, even if they don't have much of it themselves, to push for better for their children. Sometimes, an interested teacher, counselor or other adult can make all the difference in connecting capable youth with supportive programs. Not to mention self-motivated students like myself. I knew better was out there, I was smart, and I was going to get it. The truth is, college education in the USA was not originally meant for the masses. It was a European carryover designed as an exclusive system for those with money and who would run society and the rest of us. The founding fathers didn't really think the mostly rural inhabitants of the early US had what it took to govern, hence the electoral college, but that's another subject for another day. Many people, especially poor black people, could not afford to take time to even learn to read and write, as even children had to work. Higher education for the masses is actualy a fairly recent phenomenon of a few decades. So while a class system definitely remains in place, access to higher education has elevated many of us out of poverty or lower middle class. As a black person, I stress the importance of education, without it you have almost no chance in this society as everything else still remains stacked against you. Yeah, we are still fucked to some degree, but less fucked and I'll take it. Money will always talk in America, and mediocre C student Yale graduates (and worse) will always be able to become POTUS because of their name and connections. But Harvard law grad Barack Obama became POTUS with no name and no connections. Michelle Obama was not from an elite family either, and obtained her Harvard law degree. I would hope that anyone teaching poor children would do their best to help any student reach their full potential, despite the many challenges. Even one success story is worth the effort. And as Forrest Gump said, "That's all I have to say about that."
  7. Mia404

    Kristen Nicole Young

    My 23 year old daughter passed away from complications from H1N1, 10 years ago. She was hospitalized in a medically induced coma for 2 months, seemed to be recovering, then passed away from a blood clot that travelled to her lung. She had not been vaccinated. I wish people would realize how serious the flu can be. Even if the vaccine is not 100% effective, it usually lessens the severity of the symptoms if you do get sick with a different virus. One of my own stepdaughters is an anti-vaxxer, and the other is a nurse who was annoyed she was required to get a flu shot when working with cancer patients. Both of them were close to my daughter, and watched her suffer for months, but still don't believe in vaccinating their own kids.
  8. Geez, girlfriend sticks a hat on her head and she’s suddenly high maintenance. She’s boho chic, like Jinger was before she became “pastor’s wife chic” and like a million other girls on Instagram. Her actions, her beliefs, her attitude all seem like fair game, but a 20 year old girl who wants to look nice on Christmas? She gets a pass from me on that.
  9. feministxtian

    Mills Family 4: Playing Magic for Jesus

    I understand this feeling. When my husband went into hospice, I just wanted to get it over with. He was suffering, He was comatose, 100lbs, his arms and legs contracting from the brain damage. I wanted it all to STOP. I wanted his suffering to STOP. The only way to stop it was for him to pass away. It was hell on earth the last few weeks of his life. He was not himself, the brain tumors were screwing with his moods, he was incontinent, incoherent most of the time, wasn't eating, wasn't drinking, refused to take his meds. As much as losing him crushed me, watching him suffer was hell on earth. I loved and still love my husband, but watching the man who had been rather vain end up in diapers, urinating on himself, pooping his pants...it was a blessing when his suffering ended. Don't be so quick to judge here
  10. HerNameIsBuffy

    Josiah and Lauren 16: Just Another Young Fundie Couple

    Wow. There is a fine line between opinion and fan fiction and I think this blew right past it. Opining on the thoughts, feelings, and motivations of a total stranger to this degree is a level of emotional investment I don't understand.
  11. Lady Grass Lake

    Anna Marie has Breast Cancer

    Regardless of what we feel about their individual beliefs, no one deserves to have this diagnosis at such a young age. I can imagine this will have a huge impact on the entire family.
  12. HerNameIsBuffy

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    I certainly hope he breaks free from his daddy's hold and lives for many years under the umbrella of protection of the Arkansas prison system.
  13. HerNameIsBuffy

    JinJer 51: Can't Even Sell Donuts!

    She didn't lose her deal because she was a victim of her brother. She lost her deal because people, rightfully, complained about her representation given her own actions and that she's a very public face of some very hateful beliefs that she hasn't once disavowed. She went from her own bigoted and homophobic family to her even more openly bigoted and homophobic husband who is, as we speak, going to school to more effectively proselytize against anyone who doesn't share their beliefs. Gays, Catholics, anyone who is smart enough to understand that pro-life/pro-choice are more complicated issues than choosing a side in kick ball. What exactly has she been doing that's her "own thing?" Becoming an influencer capitalizing on her fame of being a cult member? Throwing 100% support behind her husband whose beliefs actively harm innocent people? Why should she get money for eating donuts or spamming chicken sandwiches?
  14. breakfree

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    I almost never defend those two but I don't think this is a fair characterization of what they did as presented on the episode where it was shown. It seemed they were seeking answers about how likely she was to conceive again naturally and the doctor said it was technically possible but very unlikely naturally. No further fertility treatment options were mentioned by the doctor nor did Jboob or jchelle raise such a possibility at least on camera. While the vibe I got was that she at least was hoping the doctor would say it was possible from what we saw they were only seeking information. She was gonna keep joyfully available-ing on either way. This isn't to say I think they acted responsibly about childbearing. Not at all. But it's not accurate based on anything we know to claim they sought fertility treatments.
  15. Intothewind

    Lisa Metzger: Homeschooling on Bed Rest with Your 14th Child

    It looks like he knocked up his wife AND his daughter in the photos. Gross.
  16. 3splenty

    Mills Family 5: YouTube Really Is Optional

    Death and dying deserve the same love, caring, and dignity as life's beginning. Death is a natural part of life. Sometimes knowing someone else has been in the same situation is comforting. Knowing the body is going to do some unusual things (incontinence, color changes, etc.) is important. Knowing you can reach out, ask questions, and/or vent is comforting. Being able to cope and mourn, yet celebrate your loved one's life, is vital. Death makes the living behave irrationally, that's for sure. Grief has no timelines, no rules. And that's okay. No one knows how they will react until they are in that situation. As a family member once told me, "Dad hasn't looked that much at peace in a long time. He's well at last. Part of me died, but part of him lives there now."
  17. Screamapillar

    JinJer 51: Can't Even Sell Donuts!

    I want to stress that the criticism of Jeremy in a Harvard sweatshirt is because it’s Jeremy in a Harvard sweatshirt. He has worn this shirt in several social media posts. Jinjer are attempting a learned, cultured social media persona that is snarkable in many ways. The Harvard shirt is an example. Try-hard Jeremy in his loafers and his Harvard shirt reading his Latin books at an Instagram friendly location is what is being critiqued here, not you, or your children, or your husband, etc, etc. If Jeremy’s brother works at Harvard and the shirt was a gift from him, ok. But if Jeremy’s brother worked at a random mid or low-tier state college and gifted Jeremy a shirt from said college, would Jeremy plaster it all over Instagram? I think not. I don’t think we’ve even ever seen Jeremy wear a Syracuse shirt, the school that he actually attended.
  18. HerNameIsBuffy

    JinJer 51: Can't Even Sell Donuts!

    Before this thread I had no idea there were such nuanced etiquette rules about wearing sweatshirts.
  19. nausicaa

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    No. There was talk of this at the time of the molestation news being confirmed, and I've never believed it. For all JB's flaws, I really think he loves his girls (even more than the boys) and did not see them this way at all after the molestation (despite what his disgusting beliefs may be). I think he really believed Jill in particular was the bees' knees and went along with this relationship because Derick seemed to make Jill so happy. And in their social circles and region, Jill was a perfectly normal marriage age. I've never gotten the impression JB really pushes his daughters into marriage (look at Jana). And maybe I'm giving him too much credit, but I do think if one of his daughters were engaged and came to him and said "Daddy, I just don't feel right about this," or especially "Daddy, he isn't good to me," I do think he would call off the wedding and not give a shit about appearances. He's a different king of his castle than Steve Maxwell and Steve Anderson in that way.
  20. viii

    Dillards 81: Volunteering for God

    I think Michelle is sneaky, devious, and underhanded. People underestimate her in my opinion. I grew up in a religious cult very similar, and I knew a lot of women like Michelle. They are just as dangerous as their husbands. The Duggar lifestyle isn’t his, it’s theirs, and she pushes it just as much as he does.
  21. Not that josh's mom

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    I need to apologize for my rants about having to drive everywhere and feeling like no one understood. It's difficult and frustrating. My husband had been hospitalized twice this winter and I'm feeling overwhelmed and frightened. Sorry to have taken it out on you all. I'm usually a pretty nice person.
  22. Jinder Roles

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    I cannot stand when people (especially white people) who are diametrically opposed to Dr King’s vision and values quote him like he was some passive, non-threatening fairy. Best believe a lot of Republicans/conservatives would have ridiculed MLK if he was alive today. You voted for Trump, Derick. Shut up.
  23. BernRul

    JinJer 51: Can't Even Sell Donuts!

    So let's say I'm from a family that makes under $65,000. Chances are my parents can't afford to send me to a private school. Maybe a Catholic school, but they'll have to bust their asses off to make that tuition. Depending on where I live, the public school is shit. Outdated resources, lack of creative classes like art and music, and possibly more than 35 kids in a class. Many of these kids are going to be Below Basic on standardized tests, have learning delays due to poverty, and get all of the attention in a school that only teaches to the test, because that's where the school's limited funding comes from. I'm a gifted and talented student. I have an intellectual gift. But that is ignored in my school, which does not have the resources. How the hell can I compete with kids who come from generational wealth? The kids who have been spoonfed the makings of perfect Harvard candidate by their parents, communities, and elite schools? I can't. Sure, some lucky one in a million kid will benefit from this. But imo, that doesn't change the fact that Harvard still has legacy admissions and overwhelmingly favors the advantaged. The $65,000 thing exists so we can pat ourselves on the back about how America is a meritocracy, when in reality we have a modern class struggle that looks more like 18th century France than the American Dream™️.
  24. sableduck

    When your dad and brother don’t approve of your marriage

    I have two kids with special needs, my husband has decided he’s in love with someone else, and I have literally zero fucks left to give. Cross me about my kid, and I will stab your eyes out with my fork.
  25. Cora Persephona

    Josiah and Lauren 16: Just Another Young Fundie Couple

    To be honest, 30 minutes at that gathering would have completely drained me of energy even without a baby.
  26. singsingsing

    Josiah and Lauren 16: Just Another Young Fundie Couple

    Well, the Bates girls' Instagram aesthetic is, and please excuse the term, just the basic bitch evangelical white girl aesthetic. So while I'm sure Lauren takes inspiration from them, they're really all drawing from the same source (which is probably Pinterest and white girl evangelical Instagram in general). Even with the baby-under-the-tree photo, it's entirely possible that Josie and Lauren both just saw the same Pinterest post. I agree that Lauren isn't pulling it off, which imo is not a bad thing. First, she's super young, and most people are still kind of awkward and trying to define their style at that age. Second, I'm not sure how the Bateses came about their relatively recent influencer aesthetic prowess, but they were a hot mess before, and general consensus was they were weirder and way less stylish than the Duggars circa 2008, which is really saying something. They are now highly polished turds. I detest the Duggars, but the Bateses even more so, in large part due to their phony influencer vibe which I find both incredibly annoying and sinister.
  27. petrushka

    Anna Marie has Breast Cancer

    I truly feel for her. There is never a good time to be diagnosed with any type of cancer, but during pregnancy and with a growing family to care for, this has to be a hard blow for them. I just finished 3 weeks of radiation treatment after a DCIS diagnosis and lumpectomy in November and was under orders to limit lifting and carrying for 6 weeks to avoid complications. I assume Anna Marie's restrictions will be similar following surgery, She's going to need lots of help at home for months while she goes through follow up care. It will be interesting to know how well Samaritan will cover what is going to be very costly care.
  28. JermajestyDuggar

    Anna Marie has Breast Cancer

    I’m just glad she’s far enough along to be induced so she can get started on treatment! I guess that’s one thing to be thankful for in this situation. I hope they are early in their detection.
  29. Bad Wolf

    Seewalds 43: Pants may Have Been Worn Or Not

    I wonder if our friends across the pond are enjoying this thread title, pants being underwear in the UK. It certainly puts a different aspect on things.
  30. Destiny

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    I'm sorry, but that's just not feasible. Where i live, the nearest grocery store is 15 min by car, on highways with no real shoulders or lighting. Uber and Lyft don't serve here either. I would LOVE to never drive again, but, that's just not reality.
  31. nelliebelle1197

    Anna Marie has Breast Cancer

    Troll warning! Troll warning! Ignore it, downvote it into oblivion but don’t reply to it. I think it has a crack problem that keeps it up all night.
  32. So Free Jinger basically collectively told Lauren "Smile! You'd be so much prettier if you'd smile!" All right, wrap it up everyone. We've officially become what we hate. 😄 I have a friend who now lives in the D.C. area but grew up in Seattle. I love her absolute delight at seeing people dress up. We went to the Virginia Gold Cup together last year and it was like a kid at Disney World, she just kept exclaiming "People are so fancy! Even though we're outside! They are wearing HATS!?!" Meanwhile, she had to explain to me that one of her Seattle friends genuinely refers to her dress up clothes as her "going out Gortex." I sprained my hand clutching my pearls so hard.
  33. Skeptic55

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    Derick just posted a video of the kids dancing wildly (like normal kids) to techno music with him and Jill flickering the lights to make a club atmosphere. They’ve come so far (arguably not), yet soooooo far to go.
  34. daisyjane1234

    Chelsy and John Maxwell 7: Not as Beige as Maxhell - Yet

    Did people catch her interesting comment in her "random life" post. She shared that she travelled extensively on her own throughout the fall because John was busy. Here is her direct quote...."Sadly, due to other commitments, it didn't work out for John to go with us, but thankfully for me I have a father who taught me to be totally comfortable traveling on my own,..." For me, this is even more significant that her wearing jeans.
  35. MayMay1123

    Mills Family 5: YouTube Really Is Optional

    when Grace died, she was held for 3 days-by her parents, her sister, her grandparents, her uncle. its something that gives me so much comfort. i have been reading a facebook page for parents (and grands) who have had miscarriages and stillbirths and baby deaths, its incredible what i never knew because i'd never experienced it, because no one talks about it. why shouldn't we talk about death? it happens to everyone.
  36. Sorry in advance for long post, but I feel a need to rant about real life and Lori life. I've been a Lori break as well...but for different reasons. Two weeks before Christmas my husband was at the gym and suffered a massive heart attack. For those of you with a medical background it is one called a "STEMI" and more commonly known as a "widow-maker." Due to his excellent (otherwise) health (no high BP, no meds, he weighs the same as he did in HS, exercises, eats right, no high cholesterol, etc) and quick intervention at an advanced hospital (where I also happen to work and insure the family thru -- sorry about that awkward sentence), he not only survived but is doing well considering. It will be many months of recuperating, rehab, etc...but the doctors are hopeful he wont' have any lingering heart damage...but we won't know for 30 -40 days or so while heart heals. Let me tell you, I rode with him in the ambulance, was at the hospital night and day, rallying family and friends (who have been amazing providing meals the first week, setting up schedules to visit so I can get out of the house, etc) and helping my children (26, 23 and 15) hold it all together. Nerves and stomach issues didn't keep me away. I hate to judge how others handle dire situations, but I will call BULLSHIT on Lori during Ken's health scare. I didn't keep in touch via text or make my adult kids do the bidding. I didn't make excuses. My husband needed me to be strong and my kids needed me to be strong. I sucked it up (and it was hard...I let myself fall apart at night) even thought I didn't sleep much the first week with everything that happened and everything that had to happen when he came home. I tell everyone adrenaline, caffeine and sure will-power along with my faith helped me get through each day. It has since gotten better, but there are still challenges now and the near future. Also, thanks to me working and having good insurance we luckily won't have to go bankrupt or severely in debt due to his illness. Because we DID plan for the "what ifs" and Thank God we did! Also he may not be able to work for several months (we'll have a better idea next week at his next follow up appt.) but even with short term disability insurance, financially it will be tough the next couple months, despite not having to worry about hundreds of thousands of dollars in medical expenses. He's on 7 different life saving medications right now, and without the health insurance I cover the family with...that ALONE would break our budget within a month or two. I am a believer and God is good. We have awesome friends and family who have rallied to help us, but even with that much/most of the burden right now is on my shoulders. I am not angry....bad things happen to people all the time. I will just persevere and be as strong as possible. I know worse things have happened to other families. We will get through. But through all of this, and pondering Lori and all she dictates, it makes me angry. Women are not weak. I can be a "keeper at home" and work outside the home and not be outside of God's will for my life. God made me a strong woman for a reason. I have always been strong...and even when I feel like I'm brought to my knees, I believe God gave me the intelligence and life skills/tools and good people in my life to get thru it. I am judging you, Lori. I don't feel good about it, but I own it. She couldn't do what I can do because I don't use false religion as an excuse to hold me down as a woman. NOW, catching up on the Lori threads, here are some BEC observations. * In her notes on her daughter's social media and on her DIL social media...she never actually "congratulates" them on motherhood or the birth of a new child. Her comments are always a reflection on herself such as "oh...MY 11th grandchild was born" It would be really nice once in a while for her to post a unselfish comment like "congratulations! You are a wonderful wife and mother. Enjoy your new baby." But I know that's too much to ask. in the same vein, when Alyssa got pregnant and several times after, Lori always said things like "I PRAYED for that baby for seven years." Now I'm a big believer in prayer, but Lori's comments made it seem it was ONLY because of her prayers, that Alyssa got pregnant. * I'm sick of Alyssa, too. Sweetie, you aren't the first woman to ever have a baby. Suck it up.
  37. Just a little update on how I'm doing: by now, I have finished reading Why Does He Do That by Lundy Bancroft twice. This book has become my friend. It has laid out everything so plainly I can never get confused again. It turns out I'm living with a man who fits three separate behavioral patterns: The Demand Man, Mr Always Right, and Water Torturer (kind of self explanatory, I think). It was such a bitter pill to swallow but now I know what I'm dealing with. I'm also bringing more friends into the loop because I really need a support network right now and to make it as large as I can. Everyone who knows what I'm going through, including my mom, says I would be justified in leaving. The question remains whether it will be in my and my children's best interests. I'm certainly not rushing into anything, but just knowing that I have options and people standing behind me is very empowering.
  38. HerNameIsBuffy

    JinJer 51: Can't Even Sell Donuts!

    This. Perfectly worded. Like back when they were yammering on about her decorating skills. So she can drive to Hobby Lobby and hang pithy sayings on a wall. Congrats, I guess, for doing something literally everyone can do? I look at Jana and don't see some kind of renaissance woman. I see a stunted adult who is nearly 30 who has never held a job, and has never made a real attempt to improve her extremely limited education. Her one actual achievement is raising her parents children. That's what she has been spending her life doing, and considering she has been doing it in keeping with JB and M's approval it means she's been reinforcing the cult. Idk about anyone else, but I don't see that as something to be lauded. Yes, Jana can garden. So can a lot of people if they don't need to earn a living or make a decision or function as an adult in society...all of which is pretty time consuming. So her being really good at her hobbies is understandable when it's not like she's got anything else taking up her time.
  39. Witnessing what an abusive parent Michelle has been makes it hard to consider any tribute to her 'lovely'. Glad the baby gets a decent name though, since she'll have enough other shit to deal with.
  40. Screamapillar

    Meghan and Harry 2: Now with Archie

    Okay, this fake headline cracked me up though. 😂
  41. SassyPants

    JinJer 51: Can't Even Sell Donuts!

    Putting all the clothing and Ivy League talk aside for a moment, I think what should be at the ❤️ of this discussion in terms of The faux intellect, Jeremy, is the fact that he chose a fully uneducated Duggar to be his life partner. How does a person like Jeremy even find a topic to discuss with Jinger? Is it a constant lecture? Does Jinger take notes, or is she required to do so? I wonder if Jinger has taught Jeremy anything beyond the physics of a full, open coffee cup in a fast moving car, how to change a diaper and the JB school of ripping people off? The reality does not match Jeremy’s self perception at all.
  42. It's been the better part of a decade now, but my partner spent some time (months total) in the hospital and the first week or so of it was spent in ICU. We had no idea if he'd survive. Our Small Humans were even smaller humans then and I was so very grateful the staff broke the visiting rules for us. The official rule was no kids under 12 but they allowed our three in for a quick visit a couple of days in. Our oldest was 5 and remembers the visit, and for him it was helpful because he was convinced my DP was actually dead, and as rough as his Dads condition was at that point, he was clearly not dead. (It was a stroke so there was nothing bloody or trauma inducing about how DP looked to our kiddo). It was a very challenging time, and the kindness of the staff made it as bearable as is possible for something like that.
  43. WarriorJane

    Sierra 3: Paddle Faster I Hear Banjos

    I agree the term date is pretty innocuous, like having a lunch date with a friend, but Sierra says to "do it right, first date style" and come to the door with flowers. It just doesn't sit right with me. Why can't he just spend time with his kids and not view them through the gender lens.
  44. Idlewild

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    His treatment of Anna is the same as his treatment of his abused daughters- self interested damage limitation for the Duggar brand which coincides with his patriarchal sexual politics. Don’t be misled by his gushing sentimentality. Before TV he was a politician- he tells his audience what he thinks they want to hear.
  45. JermajestyDuggar

    Article: Incest, Rape, and Abuse Among the Amish

    I’m glad there’s a bit of recognition here. I’m so sick of people placing the Amish on a pedestal just because they live simply. I went to school with an ex Amish girl who was the first to help me see that the Amish aren’t some quaint little group and there are problems of abuse within the culture.
  46. Alice in Fundieland

    Priscilla and David 9: Starting Their Own Flipping Business?

    @quiversR4hunting I hope you’ll consider this a suitable alternative to your emoji problem.
  47. anachronistic

    Anna Marie has Breast Cancer

    I have 100% government funded healthcare and I’m one of the luckiest people in the country. It’s called OneCare/Commonwealth Care and is a program in Massachusetts that combines state health insurance and Medicare for people with complicated disabilities. I get so much support from them, and I also have rights. When I wasn’t getting along with my case manager I asked for another one. When I am prescribed a medication they don’t cover I have the right to appeal and so far that appeal has been granted. It’s not as fast as private insurance but the coverage is better, and I’ve developed a great team of doctors who know what they’re doing. In Scamaritan it doesn’t seem like you have any rights, and you can’t appeal. I think this recent story on them was very good and interesting, https://www.nytimes.com/2020/01/02/health/christian-health-care-insurance.html Scamaritan is for healthy people who occasionally get sick. It’s not for people with chronic illnesses or disabilities, like me. But that seems pretty hypocritical to me because Jesus said, “whatever you do to the least of these you also do to me.” I’m not sure if I’m the least but I’m pretty darn rare - I’m a zebra in terms of medical stuff, and I’m really glad to access a zoo veterinarian and not have to worry about being treated by a cats and dogs veterinarian, if that makes any sense.
  48. HarryPotterFan

    Dillards 82: Derick Spills the Tea

    FTFY This is going to sound really crass and insensitive - Wasn’t Josie delivered early to prevent Michelle from dying? How is that different than a woman getting an abortion to not die? They’re really lucky Josie survived. Josie had amazing doctors and nurses. But sadly, too many times a micro-premie has amazing doctors and nurses but doesn’t survive.


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