Erin & Chad 8: Hasbro Paine, Cleveland Paine, Labour Paine

[Meggo]

10 hours ago, GreenBeans said:

A friend of my mom’s had a preemie in the 80s, and they asked her if she wanted to participate in a long-term study on developmental delays of preemies, so her son had follow-up appointments every year (usually an interview and certain age-specific activities) until he was 18 and aged out of the study. At their last appointment, they received copies of all the videos taken throughout the years, and she said it’s such a cool thing to have!

Our hospital follows all babies born pre-32 weeks for 5 years. (well - they ask if you want to - you don't have to). But we had regular appointments with a Physical Therapist, a doc etc- and we got info on speech earlier than we likely would have. And I loved going to see them. I actually cried at our "graduation". 
My 31w5d (estimated)'er has a brain scan really early on, had his eyes checked etc. Everything is mostly okay. He has a lazy eye which we're working on fixing through glasses, and he has some developmental & cognitive delays - but he is also the only 8 year old I know who can do laundry, run an excavator, make himself eggs for dinner, gets excited to mop the floor. 

[SassyPants]

39 minutes ago, CanadianMamam said:

Erin has had major health issues from Covid and had a newborn and yet seems to have no issues with relatives coming by straight after travel. Josie came over the day aft were coming back from Colorado, now Gil and Kelly came back straight after coming back from Florida. Kelly has been in like 4 states in the last 10 days. I really don't think Covid protocols are at the root of Erin's issues with her family. 

I really think that Erin is one of those “leave it up to God” people. I do wonder if she had been dealt the fertility cards that Michaela has, if she’d have been so accepting and willing to accept God’s Decisions.

[Jackie3]

4 hours ago, Expectopatronus said:

There are lots of things to snark about with Erin but glasses on a three year old aren’t one of them. 

Actually, I think it's a good thing they got her proper medical attention. No one would snark about that. It's far better than the many fundies who ignore their kids problems or use tree tea oil for every medical issue.

My point was that routine myopia is not usually noticed/treated in toddlers, so I wondered what her issue was. Maybe she has strabismus. . . that usually diagnosed around age 2-3 or so, and glasses are often the treatment. I'll bet that is it.

That Everly is an incredibly cute kid. I like all of Erin's kids, they seem so full of life and happy. She doesn't seem to squash them down that much, so their cute little personalities can come out. It's so much more interesting to watch children playing naturally (Erin) as opposed to watching a made-up, overdressed child opening a door and smiling on command (Alyssa).

Edited February 8, 2022 by Jackie3

[front hugs > duggs]

It looks like Trace met the new baby according to Instagram. It may be telling if these pictures continue to pop up, who isn’t posting them. 

[CanadianMamam]

1 hour ago, front hugs > duggs said:

It looks like Trace met the new baby according to Instagram. It may be telling if these pictures continue to pop up, who isn’t posting them. 

Oh it is definitely telling. Whitney and Carlin did 't go to Colorado and yet, no sign of them meeting the baby. Michal did. Tori is never on instagram but we can assume she has. Josie did as soon as she got back. Now Trace. Nathan, Katie, Alyssa and  Lawson are all out of state. 

[noseybutt]

On 12/18/2021 at 7:21 AM, Howl said:

  We should be forever grateful to Lisa P. for pointing us in the direction of the absolutely snark-able  insanity that is Magnolia Pearl.

What did I just see??? Can't stop laughing at the descriptions (storytelling?) and $325 for an apron. 

And the songs about Jesus. 

What even.

[onekidanddone]

21 minutes ago, noseybutt said:

What did I just see??? Can't stop laughing at the descriptions (storytelling?) and $325 for an apron. 

And the songs about Jesus. 

What even.

A fundie version of the J. Peterman Catalog. 
$110 dollars for a wrinkled t-shirt blouse? Who has this kind of money?

All the stuff I saw looked like a lost and found box at the end of summer camp. Total junk. 

Edited February 9, 2022 by onekidanddone

[noseybutt]

43 minutes ago, noseybutt said:

And the songs about Jesus. 
 

I stand corrected. Songs about Jesus followed by "Girl Leave Your Boots by the Bed." It does talk about faith being tested so I suppose it fits???

[Jackie3]

15 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

Oh it is definitely telling. Whitney and Carlin did 't go to Colorado and yet, no sign of them meeting the baby. Michal did. Tori is never on instagram but we can assume she has. Josie did as soon as she got back. Now Trace. Nathan, Katie, Alyssa and  Lawson are all out of state. 

Definitely telling? There's a world of difference between my life and my instagram posts. I'd laugh if someone thought my posts were "definitely telling" about an area of my life.

I'm sure the same is true for the Bates. If anything, their life is far more curated. And then there's personal preferences that we know nothing about. Maybe Whitney doesn't like skiing, or her best friend was in town. Maybe Josie saw the baby as soon as she got back because she'd lent something to Erin that she needed back.  

[SassyPants]

An interesting aside…these mega fundie families always talk about how the siblings are each other’s best friends, but IMO, that’s only during the time they leave at home because there is not time to have friends. There is too much day to day work to do for the schedule to develop friendships, to explore other interests, or hone skills. Obviously in a family of 21 people, there will be some who are close and others who are not.

TL;DR, the “we are best friends” talk is all a cover for there was no time to develop friendships outside the home. Now that they are in smaller families, they can explore different relationships. They are like everyone else.

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 minute ago, SassyPants said:

An interesting aside…these mega fundie families always talk about how the siblings are each other’s best friends, but IMO, that’s only during the time they leave at home because there is not time to have friends. There is too much day to day work to do for the schedule to develop friendships, to explore other interests, or hone skills. Obviously in a family of 21 people, there will be some who are close and others who are not.

TL;DR, the “we are best friends” talk is all a cover for there was no time to develop friendships outside the home. Now that they are in smaller families, they can explore different relationships. They are like everyone else.

I think it’s also because their parents don’t allow them to develop outside friendships besides other fundie families from ATI or whatever flavor they are. 

[SassyPants]

I remember how my life changed once my kids had their own lives/schedules that needed to be accommodated. #1 kid needed to be dropped off at soccer at the same time the 6YO needed to be p/u from some activity across town. There was no way a family with 10 young kids could deal with all the possible moving parts. So, instead of the parents putting their kids and their healthy development before their need to have constant pregnancies and newborns in the home, they stayed on the unhealthy, destructive path.

6 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I think it’s also because their parents don’t allow them to develop outside friendships besides other fundie families from ATI or whatever flavor they are. 

IDK…if the Duggars had lived next door to the Bateses, would the kids have been running back and forth to play? Somehow, I doubt it. There was so much to do in each of those homes. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

5 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

I remember how my life changed once my kids had their own lives/schedules that needed to be accommodated. #1 kid needed to be dropped off at soccer at the same time the 6YO needed to be p/u from some activity across town. There was no way a family with 10 young kids could deal with all the possible moving parts. So, instead of the parents putting their kids and their healthy development before their need to have constant pregnancies and newborns in the home, they stayed on the unhealthy, destructive path.

IDK…if the Duggars had lived next door to the Bateses, would the kids have been running back and forth to play? Somehow, I doubt it. There was so much to do in each of those homes. 

I think they probably would have had to help each other a lot. I think there wouldn’t be a lot of playing because they would all be doing school and chores. But they would be around someone besides their siblings. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

I remember how my life changed once my kids had their own lives/schedules that needed to be accommodated. #1 kid needed to be dropped off at soccer at the same time the 6YO needed to be p/u from some activity across town. There was no way a family with 10 young kids could deal with all the possible moving parts. So, instead of the parents putting their kids and their healthy development before their need to have constant pregnancies and newborns in the home, they stayed on the unhealthy, destructive path.

IDK…if the Duggars had lived next door to the Bateses, would the kids have been running back and forth to play? Somehow, I doubt it. There was so much to do in each of those homes. 

Idk I'm shocked at how often the Duggars had other families over.  Pre-scandal both the Holts and Duggars said they got together almost every day.  Bowman Fedowsky (sp?) said he and his siblings lived with the Duggars for a time as kids, and even when living at home was there a lot.  

[CanadianMamam]

1 hour ago, Jackie3 said:

Definitely telling? There's a world of difference between my life and my instagram posts. I'd laugh if someone thought my posts were "definitely telling" about an area of my life.

I'm sure the same is true for the Bates. If anything, their life is far more curated. And then there's personal preferences that we know nothing about. Maybe Whitney doesn't like skiing, or her best friend was in town. Maybe Josie saw the baby as soon as she got back because she'd lent something to Erin that she needed back.  

Carlin documents every moment of her life. If she had met the baby, she would have posted. Carlin and Erin haven't interacted publically in months, after previously seeming close. It was a drastic change. 

Tori hasn't posted and I assume she has seen the baby beceuse she and Erin are close and Tori never posts anyway. Tori is not Carlin. 

I am sure there is lots we don't see, but we still see glimpses and based on what Carlin constantly chooses to show us, we can see a pattern of behavior. 

Edited February 9, 2022 by CanadianMamam

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, CanadianMamam said:

Carlin documents every moment of her life. If she had met the baby, she would have posted. Carlin and Erin haven't interacted publically in months, after previously seeming close. It was a drastic change. 

Tori hasn't posted and I assume she has seen the baby beceuse she and Erin are close and Tori never posts anyway. Tori is not Carlin. 

I am sure there is lots we don't see, but we still see glimpses and based on what Carlin constantly chooses to show us, we can see a pattern of behavior. 

Babies are a hot commodity in this group. Meeting a new baby is very likely to be posted. 

[CanadianMamam]

2 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Babies are a hot commodity in this group. Meeting a new baby is very likely to be posted. 

Exactly. Even Trace made a post about meeting Finley and he posts way less than Carlin. 

[CanadianMamam]

The sisters have their own social media styles. Carlin and Josie post a lot. They share their day to day lives, talk about work, share.things like coffee dates, etc. Erin actually tends to post about God/her little family and she reposts the stories that she is tagged in. Tori never posts anything. So Tori can visit Erin and neither of them would post beceuse it isn't either of their social media style. Josie posted and Erin reposted, same with Trace.

[formergothardite]

2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I think they probably would have had to help each other a lot. I think there wouldn’t be a lot of playing because they would all be doing school and chores. But they would be around someone besides their siblings. 

In one of the episodes where the Bates visit the Duggars it shows the Bates daughters doing lots of chores around the Duggar house. If they lived next to each other I bet the parents would have them cleaning both houses constantly. 

[SassyPants]

6 minutes ago, CanadianMamam said:

The sisters have their own social media styles. Carlin and Josie post a lot. They share their day to day lives, talk about work, share.things like coffee dates, etc. Erin actually tends to post about God/her little family and she reposts the stories that she is tagged in. Tori never posts anything. So Tori can visit Erin and neither of them would post beceuse it isn't either of their social media style. Josie posted and Erin reposted, same with Trace.

True. So since Carlin is a prolific poster and has not posted about meeting the new baby, it seems more likely that she hasn’t met her.

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 minute ago, formergothardite said:

In one of the episodes where the Bates visit the Duggars it shows the Bates daughters doing lots of chores around the Duggar house. If they lived next to each other I bet the parents would have them cleaning both houses constantly. 

Oh yeah. I think they probably would have had to work as a team at each house. Like maybe a few older girls went over the the bates house while a few of the older boys went to the Duggars. They would do chores at the houses and then switch in the afternoon. That way everyone’s laundry and dishes get done and the yards get mowed. Their stupid “many hands make light work” would be in full force. 

[CanadianMamam]

29 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

True. So since Carlin is a prolific poster and has not posted about meeting the new baby, it seems more likely that she hasn’t met her.

Yeah, Carlin posts about FTing Katie and Alyssa. If she had visited Erin and the baby, it would have at least been in her stories. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Embarrassing admission: I’m an armchair social media sociologist. I’m not an expert. But if I watch someone long enough on social media, you see patterns. And when there is a deviation to long held patterns, you notice. If you only followed Carlin for the last 2 months, you wouldn’t see the things that some people are pointing g out. Like not posting about seeing the new baby. But if you’ve been watching for years, you know it’s out of the ordinary for Carlin. 

[Jackie3]

5 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

Carlin documents every moment of her life. If she had met the baby, she would have posted.

She posts a lot. But she definitely doesn't post everything. This is true for everyone, but especially fundies. There are so many things that a fundie mom is not supposed to say or do.  

Does she post about a fight with Evan that led her to wonder about the marriage? A case of the runs? The time she lost her temper with Layla? Her mixed feelings about having another child? The time she let Layla scream because she was just too tired to deal with her? Things she'd like to try in bed? Her curiosity about people outside the fundie world? Feelings of loss or anger about her childhood? Her jealousy of her Sister A's good looks or Sister B's instagram followers? 

No, she doesn't. Yet we all know that some of these things have happened.

Edited February 10, 2022 by Jackie3

[CanadianMamam]

Obviously there are things she doesn't post, although Carlin is more open than most and has been posting about her anxiety and depression. But yes, she obviously curates her content.  However it is also true that her social media does have a pattern and that she is fairly open about her day to day comings and goings and that if she had met Finley, we would know similar to how we know Josie and Trace went to see her.