Lawsy & Tiffy 6: Shallow Pools, Reflecting Each Other

[browngrl]

here's my proposal: my (now) husband and I had already moved in together and were renovating our home. One Saturday we were out running errands and getting stuff for the reno. It was a long and exhausting day. We were both tired and hungry and there was plenty of room for contention as we were picking out hardware. colours and fixtures but we were laughing about stuff. In the middle of that my husband said "we should get married" and I said "are you asking me?" He was. We celebrated with McDonalds take out ( because all our money was sunk into the reno). It was a good day. 

Lawson and Tiffany's reality tv proposal feels hollow and plastic to me (as does all of reality tv TBH) but I guess that is what they want. 

[meep]

I don't know if they will get divorced. But I think Tiffany is young and inexperienced, I think Lawson is naive and pompous. A long-term relationship, let alone a marriage, is (fun but) really hard. The reality of a relationship (a REAL one, not one where all their time is flying off to fun places and taking photos of each other), the reality of living with another person, which neither of them has any experience with.....it's going to smack them hard in the ass. They are at least going to have some rough years ahead. 

[CanadianMamam]

11 hours ago, WiseGirl said:

I think maybe that's what bothers me with these engagements. They are made for television and don't seem personal imo. But wasn't there a photo of Tiff with an engagement ring before it was announced? I think I saw one on Tumblr.  

Also I know Lawson worked as a teen but that's almost 15 years ago now. Up TV must be more profitable than I thought. I still want someone to break the code of fundie finances...

There.was but they got engaged two days before they announced it via People.

[nst]

1 hour ago, CanadianMamam said:

There.was but they got engaged two days before they announced it via People.

ooh a whole 2 days. 

[Jackie3]

Even if Tiff was marrying a mature, educated, stable man, marriage at 22 can be difficult. It's just so young. But she is marrying a boychild, who is pompous and conceited. I'm sure they have fun together checking their instagram comments and traveling with a videographer to exotic places, but marriage is much more than that.

I do think they'll divorce after five years or so. I can't see these two immature idiots finding happiness together.

[MaryOrMartha]

I think Lawson probably felt like it was now or never. He's approaching 30 and once you hit 30 you're out to pasture in their eyes. Maybe he really does love and care for Tiffany, but from what I've seen it doesn't look like he's that into her. He more often than not looks downright irritated by her presence.

[Italiangirl]

Do you think Tiffy will start to organize the wedding immediately? or she will take some time since they don't seem to be in rush to get married like other Bates couples...

I'm curious to know more of Tuffany and her stile 

[BensAllergies]

I didn’t believe that Lawson was already close to age 30 so I looked up their birthdates. I knew that Zach was my age and that Lawson was a few kids in, but I just barely turned 33 this month so it didn’t seem possible that a 4th kid would be almost 30.

It’s crazy that by August 1st next year, the Bates will have four offspring 30 and older, and all of them born after I was.

ETA: I was 21, almost 22, when I got married to my husband who was 22. I absolutely changed a lot in my 20s as did he. Lawson’s maturity hasn’t aged much in the time I’ve followed the Bates. I agree that Tiffany could outgrow him by the time she’s 28.

Edited October 31, 2021 by BensAllergies

[browngrl]

I think that Lawson loves Lawson so he'll be fine with Tiffany as long as she continues to adore (or at least pretend to adore) him.

Some people do know exactly who they are and what they want at a very young age but don't think Tiffany is one of them. I suspect there will be a lot of change as she grows older - I'm just not sure if this will mean disillusionment and eventual dissolution of the marriage or doubling down on being a good fundie wife. 

Divorce is often (?always) hard and expensive so I hope for their sakes (and for the sake of any children who come into the mix) it works out.

[rebeccawriter01]

4 hours ago, browngrl said:

I think that Lawson loves Lawson so he'll be fine with Tiffany as long as she continues to adore (or at least pretend to adore) him.

Some people do know exactly who they are and what they want at a very young age but don't think Tiffany is one of them. I suspect there will be a lot of change as she grows older - I'm just not sure if this will mean disillusionment and eventual dissolution of the marriage or doubling down on being a good fundie wife. 

Divorce is often (?always) hard and expensive so I hope for their sakes (and for the sake of any children who come into the mix) it works out.

I don't see a divorce for them, but I can see Tiffany not feeling up to events with Lawson or Lawson having obligations (his mission trips and white savior stuff) where he will be gone for weeks if not a month or two. Most of us know those couples who are married and should be divorced but they live their lives as though they jumping on any opportunity to be apart. In my guess, that will be Lawson and Tiffany someday. 

[Lista]

On 10/29/2021 at 2:16 PM, raayx01 said:

How is that racist or homophobic?

It wasn’t my intention to offend nor was it meant to be racist.  I thought “Lawtifah” Was funny.  Still not sure how a person could see that as racist?  But a lot of stuff makes no sense anymore.  

[raayx01]

14 minutes ago, Lista said:

It wasn’t my intention to offend nor was it meant to be racist.  I thought “Lawtifah” Was funny.  Still not sure how a person could see that as racist?  But a lot of stuff makes no sense anymore.  

I personally don't like that specific couple name, but I can see how some people think it is offensive. But I do think people are overly sensitive and offended nowadays. It's just a joke.

[Lista]

1 minute ago, raayx01 said:

I personally don't like that specific couple name, but I can see how some people think it is offensive. But I do think people are overly sensitive and offended nowadays. It's just a joke.

Understandable. 

[just_ordinary]

14 hours ago, raayx01 said:

I personally don't like that specific couple name, but I can see how some people think it is offensive. But I do think people are overly sensitive and offended nowadays. It's just a joke.

I think it’s definitely not a good couples name but I don’t get why it would be homophobic? Racist maybe, if I go very very far to the BIPOC name debate about calling children Queen/Princess and the connection to Queen Latifah*. But that seems like a massive stretch to me personally. Maybe it’s the language barrier? 

*which is basically completely unknown where I am from. I just know her name because we watch football via game pass and therefore are exposed to trailers for her tv show The Equaliser. But I am sure there are many more people called exactly the same or one if the two.

Edited November 1, 2021 by just_ordinary

[QuiverFullofBooks]

2 hours ago, just_ordinary said:

I think it’s definitely not a good couples name but I don’t get why it would be homophobic? Racist maybe, if I go very very far to the BIPOC name debate about calling children Queen/Princess and the connection to Queen Latifah*. But that seems like a massive stretch to me personally. Maybe it’s the language barrier? 

*which is basically completely unknown where I am from. I just know her name because we watch football via game pass and therefore are exposed to trailers for her tv show The Equaliser. But I am sure there are many more people called exactly the same or one if the two.

Queen Latifah is a black lesbian, so anything making fun of her is potentially racist and homophobic. I understand that the intention was to make fun of Lawson and Tiffany.

[theotherelise]

I think "Miss Queen Lawtifah" sounds like intentional play on a drag queen name. I know Queen Latifah is a real person, but the combo of spelling it differently and adding Miss, it just gives a weird vibe. It's also a pretty common form of covert racism to make up perceived "ghetto" names. Shane Dawson did this with his "Shanaynay" character (ofc he's problematic in all kinds of ways, just the first example that came to mind). I imagine someone saying "Lawtifah" in an exaggerated and stereotypical AAVE dialect. 

I read it originally and scrunched up my nose. I didn't see anything intentionally bad, but I didn't like it. I was just going to move on and not say anything. Only explaining now to confirm that the perception of it being off was not just from one person.

In general, when snarking or teasing, you want your teasing to be about the couple themselves, not using someone else's name/identity/etc as the joke.

 

[Lista]

43 minutes ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

Queen Latifah is a black lesbian, so anything making fun of her is potentially racist and homophobic. I understand that the intention was to make fun of Lawson and Tiffany.

Well, I did not know that and I’m American.  I guess I should’ve never posted.  I apologize and I’m sorry if I offended anyone that may read here. That was not my intention. 

[MaryOrMartha]

I think we should go with Lawsont. Because let's be honest, it's all about Lawson, and he always comes first.

[just_ordinary]

3 hours ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

Queen Latifah is a black lesbian, so anything making fun of her is potentially racist and homophobic. I understand that the intention was to make fun of Lawson and Tiffany.

But aren’t there other Queen Latifahs out there that are maybe straight or not black? If you don’t know her, no one would bat an eye. She is hardly well known, is she?

Same for the play on “ghetto” names- the BIPOC communities here use very different names and “ghetto” names are more of a white proletarian thing. That’s not to say, there isn’t racism with obvious names from certain cultures, but they are still very different than what is meant with that phrase in the USA. It’s very much a US based forum, but I think sometimes people miss that there are quite some other nationalities here and that we have very different cues for racism or homophobia because we come from different backgrounds.

But whatever. Thanks for the explanation.

[theotherelise]

1 hour ago, just_ordinary said:

But aren’t there other Queen Latifahs out there that are maybe straight or not black? If you don’t know her, no one would bat an eye. She is hardly well known, is she?

Same for the play on “ghetto” names- the BIPOC communities here use very different names and “ghetto” names are more of a white proletarian thing. That’s not to say, there isn’t racism with obvious names from certain cultures, but they are still very different than what is meant with that phrase in the USA. It’s very much a US based forum, but I think sometimes people miss that there are quite some other nationalities here and that we have very different cues for racism or homophobia because we come from different backgrounds.

But whatever. Thanks for the explanation.

Queen Latifah is exceedingly well-known. From her wikipedia: "Latifah received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in 2006, as the first hip hop artist to do so. Latifah's work in music, film and television has earned her a Grammy Award, an Emmy Award, a Golden Globe Award, three Screen Actors Guild Awards, two NAACP Image Awards, an Academy Award nomination and sales of over two million records."

I don't think anyone was attacking the first person who suggested the "Miss Queen LawTiffah" name. Not only is this a US-based forum, but the Bateses are in the US. It's 100% understandable that we would have different cultural understandings of racist/homophobic things. 

I already responded with my description of why the initial suggestion stuck out to me as iffy. Here is what I said if you didn't see it:

Quote

I think "Miss Queen Lawtifah" sounds like intentional play on a drag queen name. I know Queen Latifah is a real person, but the combo of spelling it differently and adding Miss, it just gives a weird vibe. It's also a pretty common form of covert racism to make up perceived "ghetto" names. Shane Dawson did this with his "Shanaynay" character (ofc he's problematic in all kinds of ways, just the first example that came to mind). I imagine someone saying "Lawtifah" in an exaggerated and stereotypical AAVE dialect. 

I read it originally and scrunched up my nose. I didn't see anything intentionally bad, but I didn't like it. I was just going to move on and not say anything. Only explaining now to confirm that the perception of it being off was not just from one person.

In general, when snarking or teasing, you want your teasing to be about the couple themselves, not using someone else's name/identity/etc as the joke.

 

[AussieKrissy]

I didn’t know she was gay. Not that I care but a random fact is a random fact to store away. Is she still playing Ursula in little mermaid is more what I want to know. I think she will nail it. 

[raayx01]

47 minutes ago, AussieKrissy said:

I didn’t know she was gay. Not that I care but a random fact is a random fact to store away. Is she still playing Ursula in little mermaid is more what I want to know. I think she will nail it. 

I thought Yvette Nicole Brown was playing Ursula

[BensAllergies]

@AussieKrissy I heard she did nail it in “The Little Mermaid Live.” Melissa McCarthy will play Ursula in the live-action adaptation.

Yvette Nicole Brown is in “Once Upon a Time.” @raayx01

Edited November 1, 2021 by BensAllergies

[MaryOrMartha]

 

10 hours ago, MaryOrMartha said:

I think we should go with Lawsont. Because let's be honest, it's all about Lawson, and he always comes first.

If this got too confusing my next vote is on Lawffy.

[AussieKrissy]

1 hour ago, MaryOrMartha said:

 

If this got too confusing my next vote is on Lawffy.

Lawful

lawful awful and lawful of shit