Maxwell 14: Editing Out Fun-Loving

[lilith]

44 minutes ago, Lady Grass Lake said:

My son's Lutheran school did OCC.  I have heard, but I can't validate this as truth, that all of the boxes are dumped out and sorted by type of object l and some objects are rejected, and notes read for content.  Things you intended for one person may be divied up in multiple boxes.  Heard this from another parent who objected to the program.  

If that is the case the Maxwells would be aware of it - a few of the volunteered at OCC headquarters last year. It was Mary (maybe Anna’s) big birthday treat.

[SPHASH]

1 hour ago, Lady Grass Lake said:

My son's Lutheran school did OCC.  I have heard, but I can't validate this as truth, that all of the boxes are dumped out and sorted by type of object l and some objects are rejected, and notes read for content.  Things you intended for one person may be divied up in multiple boxes.  Heard this from another parent who objected to the program.  

We do an OCC type thing at my church and that's exactly what we do.  Open the boxes then divide the loot up by grade so everyone gets equal.  We take our shoeboxes up to a local reservation and give them out at the school there.

[Black Aliss]

2 hours ago, Lady Grass Lake said:

My son's Lutheran school did OCC.  I have heard, but I can't validate this as truth, that all of the boxes are dumped out and sorted by type of object l and some objects are rejected, and notes read for content.  Things you intended for one person may be divied up in multiple boxes.  Heard this from another parent who objected to the program.  

That's how a lot of the donation programs work--giving trees, fill a back pack for back to school, etc. People are more generous when they believe they are choosing school supplies for "Sarah, age 9, likes My Little Pony, wants to be a veterinarian when she grows up" than when they are asked to donate backpacks and school supplies. At the distribution site, the backpacks get emptied and the contents sorted so that each child gets a similar set of supplies. Likewise, when you donate to Heifer Project, you are not actually buying a goat or chicken for a particular person, you are donating a set amount of money that then goes to provide livestock to families in a village. Most, if not all, adopt-a-child agencies work that way, too. People don't do well with abstract concepts like donating money to a good cause and trusting the people who run the cause to spend it appropriately.

[dripcurl]

Not to be too off-topic, but I have been reading Titus 2 blog posts from 2000-2003. I found one on modesty from 2000, and I had no idea Steve could get even creepier. 
 

Quote

 

A while ago, we had a Christian family over for dinner. It had been a most enjoyable evening. After dinner, we gathered in the living room to sing and listen to Christopher play a few hymns on the piano. I was sitting on the floor by the fireplace, looking across the room to the hallway opening, where the piano was located. The wife of the other family was sitting on the edge of the loveseat, putting her almost directly in my line of sight to see Christopher.

She was rather conservatively dressed except for a loose fitting top with a medium neckline. She was sitting with her baby on her lap, and then she bent over to set the child on the floor in front of her. She was now directly in my line of sight. As she set the child down, she looked across at me. To my horror her top hung open, and it could have appeared to her I was inappropriately looking at her. I immediately closed my eyes and turned away, but I was never so humbled in all my life. I honestly could have wept right there.

 

Yeah Steve, you were totally NOT looking at her but at your son, and you are totally NOT vilifying her for bending over like a normal human. What is a medium-neckline to Steve anyway, the collar bone showing? She probably had on a plenty modest shirt, he was probably watching in hopes that the baby she was setting down would pull on her shirt as babies do to expose some cleavage. He probably gets off on the shaming too. 

[SPHASH]

Here's the post where they gave tools one year.  Dumbasses.  https://blog.titus2.com/2015/11/23/operation-christmas-child-shoeboxes-finished/

 

[Palimpsest]

13 minutes ago, dripcurl said:

He probably gets off on the shaming too. 

You are not off-topic.

Oh, Steve really got off - and gets off - on the shaming!  He milked it in his "Dads" conference presentation.  

This has all been discussed before, but it is always a nice reality check when someone new discovers Steve's old posts and is just as shocked as we all were when we first read them.

Steve is vile.

Mr. P (who is a very gentle, thoughtful, and slow to anger man) wanted to pop Steve on the nose after sitting through Steve's one hour "Dad's Only" conference presentation.

He described Steve as "salacious," "vulgar,"  and "disgusting."  Then he went into cuss words.

 

[lilith]

39 minutes ago, dripcurl said:

Not to be too off-topic, but I have been reading Titus 2 blog posts from 2000-2003. I found one on modesty from 2000, and I had no idea Steve could get even creepier. 
 

Yeah Steve, you were totally NOT looking at her but at your son, and you are totally NOT vilifying her for bending over like a normal human. What is a medium-neckline to Steve anyway, the collar bone showing? She probably had on a plenty modest shirt, he was probably watching in hopes that the baby she was setting down would pull on her shirt as babies do to expose some cleavage. He probably gets off on the shaming too. 

It’s always good to revisit the old Titus2 entries - the crazy isn’t as buried in mundane routine as it is now.

When I read that story I always feel so sorry for the couple. The could definitely identify themselves from Steve’s writing, and if they believe similarly to the Maxwells, which they almost certainly do, given they were socialising in Maxhell, that poor woman must feel awful.

And Steve had “never been so humbled in his life”? This is the most humbling moment in the life of a self (loudly and often) professed Christian man?

[lilith]

They fill those shoeboxes with such crap. Those cheap toys would fall apart within days. And what little kid wants a ball of fucking wool? A few boxes each, filled with good quality toys and school supplies and an age appropriate book in the child’s language, would be much better than their eleventy boxes of dollar store crap. But then they couldn’t feel all superior for putting together more boxes than anyone else.

Im surprised they don’t get the elderly contributing to OCC - it’s a ministry they may enjoy.

[dripcurl]

48 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Here's the post where they gave tools one year.  Dumbasses.  https://blog.titus2.com/2015/11/23/operation-christmas-child-shoeboxes-finished/

 

Oh my God, they are literally sending screwdrivers to children they do not even know. I want to see Red Forman put his foot in Steve's ass.

[Corntree]

Quote

A while ago, we had a Christian family over for dinner. It had been a most enjoyable evening. After dinner, we gathered in the living room to sing and listen to Christopher play a few hymns on the piano. I was sitting on the floor by the fireplace, looking across the room to the hallway opening, where the piano was located. The wife of the other family was sitting on the edge of the loveseat, putting her almost directly in my line of sight to see Christopher.

She was rather conservatively dressed except for a loose fitting top with a medium neckline. She was sitting with her baby on her lap, and then she bent over to set the child on the floor in front of her. She was now directly in my line of sight. As she set the child down, she looked across at me. To my horror her top hung open, and it could have appeared to her I was inappropriately looking at her. I immediately closed my eyes and turned away, but I was never so humbled in all my life. I honestly could have wept right there.

I honestly don't find this creepy or anything. Steve was looking at Christopher and then this woman bent down right in his line of vision and accidentally flashed him a little bit and he worried she might think he was trying to look at her boobs. It was embarrassing for him. Those kinds of situations are uncomfortable for me too, though I'm not Christian and don't have the focus on sin that Steve does. Though I agree that Steve should not have shared this on the website b/c the woman mentioned could have read the article and known he was talking about her.

I also agree Melanie looks pretty darn pregnant, but it could be bloating or something. I think @lilith is right that the Maxwells would hide her belly in pics until they made an announcement. And Benjamin is only 8.5 months old, so if she was 3-4 months pregnant now, that would be much closer child spacing than she's had before. I also thought she was slowing down, b/c the spacing between the first four kids is, in order, 27 months, 22 months and 25 months, but there are 31.5 months between Andrew and Benjamin. But who knows? I enjoy speculating and crunching numbers regardless.

[dripcurl]

43 minutes ago, Corntree said:

I honestly don't find this creepy or anything. Steve was looking at Christopher and then this woman bent down right in his line of vision and accidentally flashed him a little bit and he worried she might think he was trying to look at her boobs. It was embarrassing for him. Those kinds of situations are uncomfortable for me too, though I'm not Christian and don't have the focus on sin that Steve does. Though I agree that Steve should not have shared this on the website b/c the woman mentioned could have read the article and known he was talking about her.

Whether he was intentionally looking at her or not, the fact that Steve shared it and twisted it the way he did is in fact quite creepy. 

[lilith]

10 minutes ago, dripcurl said:

Whether he was intentionally looking at her or not, the fact that Steve shared it and twisted it the way he did is in fact quite creepy. 

As is the fact that it affected him so profoundly that he WANTED TO CRY.

[FloraDoraDolly]

14 minutes ago, dripcurl said:

Whether he was intentionally looking at her or not, the fact that Steve shared it and twisted it the way he did is in fact quite creepy. 

The fact that this woman was in the Maxwell house in the first place means she's not running around dressed like Madonna or anything like that. She was probably wearing a normal top from Target or Kohl's with the ubiquitous fundie long skirt. Steve needs to get over himself.

[meee]

9 hours ago, lilith said:

I agree Melanie looks pregnant, but if she actually was they would probably try to hide her belly until an official announcement, so I’m hoping it’s just the result of her many previous back to back pregnancies.

 

They didn't do that for Anna Marie's current pregnancy, though.

But I think it's too soon for Melanie to be pregnant again. And isn't she over 40? I'm guessing that Benjamin will be their last.

[FloraKitty35]

Steve Maxwell, the real life Major Frank Burns.  (Robert Duvall's characterization from the movie MASH.)

[Flossie]

10 hours ago, Lady Grass Lake said:

My son's Lutheran school did OCC.  I have heard, but I can't validate this as truth, that all of the boxes are dumped out and sorted by type of object l and some objects are rejected, and notes read for content.  Things you intended for one person may be divied up in multiple boxes.  Heard this from another parent who objected to the program.  

We used to do Toys for Tots, and even then we were told to wrap the shoeboxes tops and bottoms separately, so they could easily be inspected.  It was only the last year we participated that we were told that the packages were 'equalized' so that no child got more than any other child, and things that were considered inappropriate could be weeded out.

After that we experienced financial difficulties and when we were able to start up again, we've gone for the giving tree in Walmart, intended for foster children in the local area.  That has brought up a whole new problem.  We've seen kids asking for X-boxes and games, concert tickets, and leather jackets.  Last year we plucked a card and it was from a teen girl that said "make-up".  I thought "What kind of make-up?  What is your skin tone?"  We had no other choice but to buy a couple of gift boxes with selections of nail polish and lipstick.  I considered a gift card, but I wanted her to have something on Christmas morning.  Now I think that the gift card might have been a better choice.

[lilith]

15 minutes ago, Flossie said:

We used to do Toys for Tots, and even then we were told to wrap the shoeboxes tops and bottoms separately, so they could easily be inspected.  It was only the last year we participated that we were told that the packages were 'equalized' so that no child got more than any other child, and things that were considered inappropriate could be weeded out.

After that we experienced financial difficulties and when we were able to start up again, we've gone for the giving tree in Walmart, intended for foster children in the local area.  That has brought up a whole new problem.  We've seen kids asking for X-boxes and games, concert tickets, and leather jackets.  Last year we plucked a card and it was from a teen girl that said "make-up".  I thought "What kind of make-up?  What is your skin tone?"  We had no other choice but to buy a couple of gift boxes with selections of nail polish and lipstick.  I considered a gift card, but I wanted her to have something on Christmas morning.  Now I think that the gift card might have been a better choice.

I know Xbox games and concert tickets seem excessive, and of course nobody should feel pressured to give more than they can afford, but that is what these kids peers are getting - they aren’t being greedy.

I had a few years where I really struggled with 3 very young kids and no support from their father, and we received presents from a wishing tree type program. Since we have got back on our feet I’ve taken my oldest three to shop for a present from the wishing tree for a kid of their age every year. Concert tickets may be pushing our budget, but I let them choose something they would want from Kmart (like your target). I remember going to pick up their charity presents and there being just tables upon tables of dollar store junk that you could grab as stocking stuffers. It was given with the best of intentions, but it was still dollar store junk. There were also tables for books donated by publishers that you could take what you wanted from - my kids still have and cherish some of those books.

My kids understand how lucky we are to be in a stable situation now and they give what they would have wanted to receive if we were still struggling. It was hard enough managing Christmas in poverty with kids 3 - 6. I can’t even imagine how difficult it would be with teens.

[Granwych]

1 hour ago, FloraKitty35 said:

Steve Maxwell, the real life Major Frank Burns.  (Robert Duvall's characterization from the movie MASH.)

You're being kind...

[love2scrap]

On 01/11/2017 at 5:38 AM, mango_fandango said:

Anna is about 25 I believe, Jesse and Mary are younger.

Yep, according to @Bethella's family tree, Anna was born in 1992.

http://fotw.freejinger.org/family.php?famid=F23&ged=fotw2

I feel sad for anna. I am her age, and grew up with a stevehovah-ish dad. There were lots of mindgames, powerplay and manipulation. Siblings had to be our bestfriends too, if you didn't accept that ideal you were branded ungrateful and covetous. The maxwell girls' dressing reminds me of what we were "encouraged" to wear. To this day, my dad who is pretty much alienated from all of us kids, still refuses to speak or look at me if i turn up at family gatherings in shorts or a sleeveless top. For reference: my sisters and I wore these to one of our family trips circa 2010.

[VodouDoll]

I am ALWAYS here for Classic Maxwell

Re: Steve getting a look at his guest's cleavage - I agree that it obviously really embarrassed and distressed him. And I agree that it was crappy of him to talk about it on the blog, where this woman would surely recognize herself and be embarrassed and distressed in turn. But the REALLY creepy part of that post is what he goes on to say, that it's a man's duty to make sure his wife is dressed modestly and if he doesn't he'll answer to Jesus for it someday. It was a total shade move: Steve was embarrassed so on his public blog he low-key called out the other man for it: it's YOUR sin that I saw down your wife's shirt and you need to repent or burn.

@Palimpsest, vulgar is an interesting choice of words, and one I wouldn't have expected. Would you mind expanding?

[JermajestyDuggar]

I wonder what Steve thinks of Chelsy having a bachelorette party. So worldly! I'm sure it will just be a get together of their girlfriends eating food and chatting. It's not like they will get drunk and give her skimpy nighties as gifts. But a low key bachelorette party can't be ok with Steve. 

[Bajovane]

7 hours ago, lilith said:

As is the fact that it affected him so profoundly that he WANTED TO CRY.

Right there is the sign of a profoundly disturbed man.  He is so full of guilt and shame and feels that he must live the way he does because he is so contaminated that he must beg for forgiveness over and over and over.  Steve - that is lack of faith right there.  You should believe it when you ask for forgiveness, it is given but you keep it going on and on and on and involve your entire family to the point they are severely stunted and cannot face the real world without your "guidance"

I really have to wonder just what happened to him in the past that made him go so deeply into the rabbit hole. 

 

[HereticHick]

31 minutes ago, Bajovane said:

I really have to wonder just what happened to him in the past that made him go so deeply into the rabbit hole. 

 

What nasty thing did he see in the woodshed?

[IReallyAmHopewell]

11 hours ago, lilith said:

 age appropriate book in the child’s language, would be much better

This WOULD me great, but it isn't possible. You do not get to pick where the boxes go. I pack these boxes to because my son received one in a Ukrainian orphanage. I've lived in Africa and spent quite a while in Ukraine. I can say that I totally hate the crap toys and the people who don't remove the packaging (it becomes trash with no place to go) but the HOPE it gave my son and other children is the big reason for doing it. Knowing first hand what this can mean makes me do these. I don't agree with everything but its worth it for hope. [I also cannot imagine why deodorant is on the suggested list of stuff to include. True first world thing].

Just now, HereticHick said:

What nasty thing did he see in the woodshed?

OMG!!!! I JUST finished and reviewd Cold Comfort Farm lol

58 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I wonder what Steve thinks of Chelsy having a bachelorette party. So worldly! I'm sure it will just be a get together of their girlfriends eating food and chatting. It's not like they will get drunk and give her skimpy nighties as gifts. But a low key bachelorette party can't be ok with Steve. 

Probably have molten lava cake, fake wine [sparkling juice] and watch Fireproof

[Palimpsest]

1 hour ago, VodouDoll said:

But the REALLY creepy part of that post is what he goes on to say, that it's a man's duty to make sure his wife is dressed modestly and if he doesn't he'll answer to Jesus for it someday. It was a total shade move: Steve was embarrassed so on his public blog he low-key called out the other man for it: it's YOUR sin that I saw down your wife's shirt and you need to repent or burn.

Exactly.  And not only in his public blog.  He features this story in his Dad's Only session too.  Women are apparently defrauding Steve whatever they wear - and he goes on a rant about contrasting buttons somewhere.  It is the husband's responsibility to monitor his stupid wife's clothing so the great Patriarch doesn't get embarrassed when he let his eyes wander and accidentally ogles someone's bra.  Or hell fire.

1 hour ago, VodouDoll said:

Palimpsest, vulgar is an interesting choice of words, and one I wouldn't have expected. Would you mind expanding?

This session is for men only (although a few bring their tiny sons) and I think Mr. P is the only mole we have so far.  He still talks about it with disgust.  Steve does a lot of nudge-nudging, winking, and weeping.

I went nuts on FJ after attending that conference with multiple embarrassingly long posts.  We were both upset by Steve and needed to process. 

Nothing like his own words, and I actually managed to find them.  Mr. P wrote up his own report and I posted it here: