Maxwell 14: Editing Out Fun-Loving

[MamaJunebug]

3 hours ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

This is so interesting. I'm in my early 30's and while I don't personally call anyone honey, sweetie, etc. It has never bothered me to be called those names by strangers out in public. I figure public-facing jobs are stressful and they are trying to connect on a personal level with the customer in front of them. Everyone deserves to be addressed respectfully and just because honey doesn't bother me doesn't mean someone else's feelings about it are invalid. 

That’s really nice of you!

I’m an odd insect and loved my time as a retail employee; received a couple dozen written compliments tom from customers in a  matter of months. It never occurred to me to call them anything but ma’am or sir, not even the little old ladies or gents whose charming appearances and demeanors were out of a 1940’s movie.

Maybe it’s a generational thing?

PS: I’m also a spitefulminsect, I guess, because when a younger man addresses me as “young lady” I want to whack him.  Any zingers in response to that, anybody?  I’ve called a few of  them “old man” with varying results.  

(Yes, my life is pretty darned enviable when this is one of my major peeves!)

[Botkinetti]

I am 58. When much younger people use sweetie or hon to me it irritates the hell out of me. I especially hate comments designed to supposedly flatter me into thinking that they think I am younger. There is no shame in being my age. I have enjoyed my forties and fifties much more than I ever thought I would.

 I use terms of endearment all the time but to people who are actually dear to me. I think it cheapens the terms when you use them indiscriminately.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

11 hours ago, terranova said:

No one calls anyone ma'am here unless they're the Queen!

 

I just imagine Sarah, Anna and Mary and their friends roleplaying Jesus' life, writing fanfic about him...

You know as funny as this is, they are little different than the devout Catholic girls 60--100 years ago who dreamed of being "Brides of Christ" and became nuns, sealing their "love" in a white wedding gown and receiving a ring.

I think it is ok to socialize in groups so there are no "special friendships"--again, a thing harkening back to nuns.

Sarah? Be careful, Sweetie. Coffee is dangerously close to being the new Pepsi. Just sayin.....

[MamaJunebug]

1 hour ago, Botkinetti said:

I am 58. When much younger people use sweetie or hon to me it irritates the hell out of me. .....

 I use terms of endearment all the time but to people who are actually dear to me. I think it cheapens the terms when you use them indiscriminately.

Thank you for saying “cheapens”!

Just the word I’ve been looking for. And whoever pointed out the condescension Of The habit, yes. It cheapens & condescends. 

Interesting, @Botkinetti, that you specify “much younger” people. I'm trying to think of a time a person/stranger my age has used the “d” word on me. I’m going to be on high alert for it! (Oh, woe betide the first sister-boomer who says it...)

i do have a friend of over a decade who recently has begun to call us all “dear.”  She’s 5 years older than me and has walked thru the fire — trust me, you do not want her life, no matter how great it is now.   Anyhoo, she’s an occasional “dearer” and while it flustered me at first, I almost expect it now — it’s become part of her charm. But she’s - so far - unique on that score.

5 minutes ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

Sarah? Be careful, Sweetie. Coffee is dangerously close to being the new Pepsi. Just sayin.....

My first belly-chuckle of the day!! Much appreciated!!!

[Botkinetti]

I worked with a woman only a few years older who used the term dear. Even though I don't ever use the word except sarcastically she only said it to people she liked and respected so I was okay with it.

One of my sons former girlfriends told me that she felt like part of the family the first time I called her sweetie rather than her name. I then felt badly because I considered her part of the family much earlier but didn't want to overstep boundaries. Sweetie just slipped out.

[StacyW]

Michelle Obama said that when she met with groups of children when she was First Lady, she would call them all "sweetie" because she would never remember all their names. I think that it is one of the few valid reasons to call a stranger "sweetie."

[mango_fandango]

I wouldn't mind being called sweetie by someone as awesome and lovely as Michelle Obama. Alas... 

Anna's birthday tomorrow. Here's last year's post:

 

Happy Birthday to our dear, sweet Anna! We delight to see your love for the Lord Jesus, your family, ministry, and children. You are a totally fun aunt (you should hear her teaching kids’ songs to the nieces and nephews!), and your sparkle for life adds joy to all of our lives.

You are beyond amazing in the kitchen, and for those who haven’t tasted Anna’s cooking, I’ll simply say, “I’m sorry!” She is incredible and creative.

Anna and Mary are partners in doing surprise cleanings of the sister-in-laws homes, and Anna delights in serving.

Happy birthday, Anna! We love you!

The one for 2015 was similar. I forget how she takes her coffee.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

1 hour ago, mango_fandango said:

I wouldn't mind being called sweetie by someone as awesome and lovely as Michelle Obama. Alas... 

Anna's birthday tomorrow. Here's last year's post:

 

 

Poor Anna.... here have a lemon slice in your water--it is a your birthday. [From the long-ago Josh/Anna engagement skit on Eleventy-hundred Kids and Counting.] I wonder if she'll get to do something to serve others? And I bet Bible time is just the bestest tomorrow! Happy Birthday Anna! Hope you get a 2nd burrito and are allowed to pet the dog.

[Coconutwater]

New post up for Anna’s Birthday. She has a passion for the unborn like Mary and is energetic and loves children...

[PennySycamore]

Waitresses from Philly or Jersey (maybe the whole MidAtlantic region) are allowed to call you "hon" especially if they work in a diner.  That has it's own special charm.  Otherwise, it's not appropriate.

[MamaJunebug]

54 minutes ago, PennySycamore said:

Waitresses from Philly or Jersey (maybe the whole MidAtlantic region) are allowed to call you "hon" especially if they work in a diner.  That has it's own special charm.  Otherwise, it's not appropriate.

There was a great lady, dithery as all get-out but a very good waitress, who we all caked “Honey” because she called everyone “oh, honey” — everyone!!!  She always seemed breathless and so eager to serve.  Yes, absolutely, they can “honey” me all they like! 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Chelsy says she will be barefoot for her wedding ceremony :-/ 

What would Steve think of this? Is it appropriate to be barefoot in a church?

[hollyandivy]

12 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Is it appropriate to be barefoot in a church?

Exodus 3:5 Putt off Thy shoes from Thy feet, for the place whereon Thou standest is holy ground.

 

(and I used King James, as all other translations are evil ;)

[Eternalbluepearl]

18 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Is it appropriate to be barefoot in a church?

I don't know but the Duggars certainly think so. It's totally okay if one wanted to wear flats. Flats are still an option. I wore the tiniest kitten heel to my wedding because I'm not one for high heels, but we had a non-religious ceremony in a butterfly conservatory so bare feet would have been kinda gross.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

Wow! Amazing! Anna loves Jesus!    I did NOT know that. And that picture of her grimacing into the distance--must be seeing her future, bless her tightly-bound heart.

Happy Birthday SWEET Anna! You are so PRECIOUS! I hope Daddy lets you out to get married before you are 50.

 

http://burrito.jpg

[JermajestyDuggar]

She's getting married in winter. So she will eventually have to put shoes on. I don't like heels either but I wore flats in my wedding. It was no big deal. 

[IReallyAmHopewell]

43 minutes ago, hollyandivy said:

Exodus 3:5 Putt off Thy shoes from Thy feet, for the place whereon Thou standest is holy ground.

 

(and I used King James, as all other translations are evil

I thought it just meant they were into being barefoot and pregnant! [honestly!]  Like that girl who posted "I believe in doorsteps" [as in prince charming will arrive on her doorstep]. 

[SPHASH]

Happy Birthday Goofy Anna.  You love fetuses more than actual living breathing people.  You don't serve others only your extended family cuz its the only time daddy will let you out of the house.  Oh and you love Jesus.  Happy birthday and Fuck you and your concern for the unborn bullshit.

[catlady]

i don't know what to make of the no shoes thing.  on the one hand, what she wears is her business.  on the other hand, it doesn't seem like appropriate attire for a church or for the solemnity of the event.  maybe her church is casual and encourages parishioners to attend services barefoot; if that's the case, then shoes off.  or maybe her whole theme is casual.  otherwise, it strikes me as weird and something i would never do; formal attire/event and bare feet just don't go together for me.

[Alisamer]

Eh, I've gone barefoot at church before. I don't see anything wrong with someone going barefoot in their wedding if they choose to, as there's a long tradition of removing shoes in holy places in a variety of cultures and religions. Although if it's a sign of "submission" I would side-eye that a bit just due to the concept.

Myself, if I ever get married, I'm planning to use it as an excuse to buy a pair of 20-hole Doc Martens, or possibly some Fluevogs. 

[mango_fandango]

How do we know Chelsy's going to be barefoot?

And staaaaahp with those weird curls, Anna. They're halfway to a crunchy Duggar perm. She looks much better with straight hair. 

Of course we get a link to that stupid video again. Urgh. Before they only mentioned Jesse as having a heart for the unborn in the birthday posts, now Mary and Anna have it in their birthday posts too. Is this a thing? They've got no hopes of marriage (well, Jesse has more than the girls) so they're gonna spend their time being pro-life wankers? Bleurgh

[Coconutwater]

16 minutes ago, mango_fandango said:

How do we know Chelsy's going to be barefoot?

She mentioned it in a comment on her blog, she’s not much of a shoe person. 

[anjulibai]

On 10/30/2017 at 10:46 AM, StacyW said:

Michelle Obama said that when she met with groups of children when she was First Lady, she would call them all "sweetie" because she would never remember all their names. I think that it is one of the few valid reasons to call a stranger "sweetie."

That's how I started calling all of my students "sweetie" - I couldn't remember all their names quickly enough, but didn't want them to think I didn't care because I didn't remember. They all are my sweeties, though. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I think it's the going barefoot in winter part that gets me. I guess if it was out on on their farm in the summer it would make sense. My church was a bit chilly in winter when I was growing up. No one went barefoot for your toes would be little icicles. 

[anjulibai]

Anyone else think it weird that in a post about Anna, they compare her to Mary? Like, why? Why not just say she has a heart for the unborn (gag me), without making a reference to a sibling? That would annoy the shit out of me.