Maxwell 14: Editing Out Fun-Loving

[johnhugh]

Quote

Kylie M. says:

October 27, 2017 at 4:52 pm

This is a blessed testimony and helps us believe that as a wife i too are leading a life on the right path and serving him until he comes.

Love and blessings 

Kylie M.

;-)

[anjulibai]

New post up - those friends of Sarah's that she visited in Texas are visiting her. She went out with them and Mary and Anna.

Interesting that they came to visit. Potential courtship going on? Someone for Jesse? Do they women have a brother? 

[lilith]

1 minute ago, anjulibai said:

New post up - those friends of Sarah's that she visited in Texas are visiting her. She went out with them and Mary and Anna.

Interesting that they came to visit. Potential courtship going on? Someone for Jesse? Do they women have a brother? 

Sorry Sarah, you no longer qualify as a “young lady serving Jesus”. You are nearing middle age and serving your father’s vanity and delusions.

I’m the same age as Sarah - I don’t consider her old, but when I’m talking about young ladies it’s referring to my teenage daughter and her friends, not to myself.

[Captain Obvious]

4 hours ago, anjulibai said:

Interesting that they came to visit. Potential courtship going on? Someone for Jesse? Do they women have a brother? 

They're the Leake family, and they're mostly girls. The only brother that is marriageable age is Gideon, who's 19 - so a possibility for Mary I suppose.

There was an older brother who might have been a possibility for Sarah at one stage, but sadly he died in a car accident in 2002 (in Kansas City, which explains how the Maxwells know the family).

http://www.homeschools.org/noahLeake/index.html

[anjulibai]

11 hours ago, lilith said:

Sorry Sarah, you no longer qualify as a “young lady serving Jesus”. You are nearing middle age and serving your father’s vanity and delusions.

I’m the same age as Sarah - I don’t consider her old, but when I’m talking about young ladies it’s referring to my teenage daughter and her friends, not to myself.

Yeah, I'm just a few years younger (34 in March) and no, I would not call myself a young lady. Of course, I'm also a married mother with two boys who went to college and has a job, all things that Sarah will never do even if she wants to. I wonder if she will still think of herself as a young lady when she's 40? 

 

6 hours ago, Captain Obvious said:

They're the Leake family, and they're mostly girls. The only brother that is marriageable age is Gideon, who's 19 - so a possibility for Mary I suppose.

There was an older brother who might have been a possibility for Sarah at one stage, but sadly he died in a car accident in 2002 (in Kansas City, which explains how the Maxwells know the family).

http://www.homeschools.org/noahLeake/index.html

Thanks for the info. Very sad about that brother.

[nomoxian]

11 hours ago, lilith said:

I’m the same age as Sarah - I don’t consider her old, but when I’m talking about young ladies it’s referring to my teenage daughter and her friends, not to myself.

The only time I would refer to anyone as a "young lady" is if they are elderly, and even then it would only be in German. I noticed my husband doing it, and the women like it (at least compared to being called 'old' or 'elderly')

Just the term "young lady" sounds like something a really old person - or a young person who grew up a long time ago - would say. 

 I was born in the early/mid 80s, so I'm not old but I'm not young either; but I also don't think I'm middle aged, though I guess I almost technically am

[JermajestyDuggar]

I could definitely see Jesse courting one of those girls in a few years. He probably isn't ready to buy a home near Maxhell just yet. I give him at least 2 years. For some reason I just don't see the Maxwells letting their youngest son leave in the next couple of years. 

[HermioneSparrow]

Yeah, Sarah at 35 should look for a retirement place... you are all crazy, she IS young. Sure, she's not in her teenage years but that doesn't mean she's not young. The whole mentality of thinking women in their thirties and beyond are middle age or old is ridiculous, no wonder in the entertainment industry and everywhere people don't hire women of a certain age because we as a society propagate that BS of being old when we leave our twenties.

 

[Palimpsest]

36 minutes ago, nomoxian said:

The only time I would refer to anyone as a "young lady" is if they are elderly, and even then it would only be in German. I noticed my husband doing it, and the women like it (at least compared to being called 'old' or 'elderly')

I doubt it.  They are probably just humoring him.   Why refer to age at all in casual conversation?  It isn't relevant.  Call older people by their names or titles.

FTR, I snarled at a 20 something car salesman about two weeks ago for calling me "young lady."  I'm 62. 

[formergothardite]

I got called young lady by a teen cashier at Walmart the other day. It was annoying. 

[Captain Obvious]

12 hours ago, lilith said:

Sorry Sarah, you no longer qualify as a “young lady serving Jesus”. You are nearing middle age and serving your father’s vanity and delusions.

I’m the same age as Sarah - I don’t consider her old, but when I’m talking about young ladies it’s referring to my teenage daughter and her friends, not to myself.

I think in fundie terminology, "young lady" is code for "unmarried woman". If a woman is married, then her term is "wife" or "wife and mother", even if she's only 19 like Joy Duggar.

i wonder if there's a cut off though. Kelly Reins is 40+ - does she still call herself a young lady?

[Jana814]

I have been called young lady before. It's annoying. I'm 37 granted I could probably pass for being in my 20's though. 

[Howl]

27 minutes ago, Palimpsest said:

FTR, I snarled at a 20 something car salesman about two weeks ago for calling me "young lady."  I'm 62. 

One of the most annoying things ever, IMHO.  I'm almost 70 and HATE it when guys do that; it comes across as condescending. 

I've not experienced it from a woman. 

[Hane]

33 minutes ago, Palimpsest said:

I doubt it.  They are probably just humoring him.   Why refer to age at all in casual conversation?  It isn't relevant.  Call older people by their names or titles.

FTR, I snarled at a 20 something car salesman about two weeks ago for calling me "young lady."  I'm 62. 

THANK YOU. When a 20-something douchebag called me that and I begged to differ with him, he flippantly replied, “Well, that’s what I was taught to say.” I wish I’d had the presence of mind to reply, “So you were taught to call people things that they find objectionable?” I’ll be 65 in two weeks.

[Palimpsest]

2 minutes ago, Hane said:

“So you were taught to call people things that they find objectionable?”

Oh, that is good!  

I merely glared at the car salesman and said, "I'm a lot older than you are, young man!  My name is XXX, and who are you?"  I also did not buy a used car from him - and I was shopping for one. 

[church_of_dog]

I’m in my mid-50s and most of the people I hang out with are around 70ish.  And even beyond my personal group of friends, my community demographics skew heavily toward elderly at this point.  Occasionally one of the town oldsters will call me “young lady” and I just take it as an intended kindness (and with a dollop of assumption that they are wishing they were my age again, lol).

I don’t think I would feel comfortable calling an elderly woman “young lady” unless I already knew she liked it.  I might call a girl a “young lady” though, since there is a cultural assumption that kids want to be older than they are, and that indicating they seem grown-up is a compliment.

[Palimpsest]

26 minutes ago, Captain Obvious said:

i wonder if there's a cut off though. Kelly Reins is 40+ - does she still call herself a young lady?

I think after a certain age unmarried Fundie women merely become "ladies."  Then "elderly ladies."  

[JermajestyDuggar]

I'm Sarah's age and I haven't been called young lady in a very long time. But I also have kids that have aged me and I probably look old for me age 

[SPHASH]

I always found the term young lady patronizing no matter my age

 

[Cassia]

I’m 33 and my mom calls me a young woman all the time. (I’ll say something like, my back hurts, and she says, “But you’re still just a young woman!”)

So I find that term rather endearing, nothing patronizing about it when it comes from my mother.

But to me, young lady is something I would say to a pre-teen/teen who was in trouble ie. “You watch that tone, young lady!”

Different connotation. 

[nomoxian]

3 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

I doubt it.  They are probably just humoring him.   Why refer to age at all in casual conversation?  It isn't relevant.  Call older people by their names or titles.

This is more in a setting where it's a random person. Like telling someone "let the young lady have a seat" if the train is full and some young, able bodied douchebag who is taking up 1.5 seats with their bag won't move it let alone their ass.

What do older people prefer to be called? Usually I just say "lady" or "woman"  I think it's a bit different in German though, because people quickly assign titles to people based on things like appearance. For example, if you're overweight, you're the "fat woman" or just "the fat".

Personally, when I'm older, I wouldn't mind a guy - especially a cute guy - calling me a young lady.

[anjulibai]

35 minutes ago, nomoxian said:

This is more in a setting where it's a random person. Like telling someone "let the young lady have a seat" if the train is full and some young, able bodied douchebag who is taking up 1.5 seats with their bag won't move it let alone their ass.

What do older people prefer to be called? Usually I just say "lady" or "woman"  I think it's a bit different in German though, because people quickly assign titles to people based on things like appearance. For example, if you're overweight, you're the "fat woman" or just "the fat".

Personally, when I'm older, I wouldn't mind a guy - especially a cute guy - calling me a young lady.

How about "lady" or "ma'am" or "madam"? Or whatever the German equivalent is? Frau? 

This is....really not that hard without being insulting. 

[SPHASH]

If the Leake girls lives are as mundane as the Maxwells do what do they have to discuss when they get together?  Tips on ceiling fan cleaning?  How to cut lettuce without a pizza cutter?  How to sneak meat into burrito filling without your headship knowing?  

[anjulibai]

Just now, SPHASH said:

If the Leake girls lives are as mundane as the Maxwells do what do they have to discuss when they get together?  Tips on ceiling fan cleaning?  How to cut lettuce without a pizza cutter?  How to sneak meat into burrito filling without your headship knowing?  

Probably, but mainly about Jesus I'm guessing. What are their favorite hims, life verses, stupid shit they are praying about.

Beyond that, it probably really is a lot of small talk. No deep conversations like you would have close friends. 

[Palimpsest]

17 minutes ago, nomoxian said:

Personally, when I'm older, I wouldn't mind a guy - especially a cute guy - calling me a young lady.

Wait until you are older. You might find it very condescending then. 

What is your husband's cut off point when he starts calling people "young lady?"  Does he count their grey hairs or wrinkles?  And does he address older men as "young man?"

My German is rusty and was never very good, but I'd say it is quite simple in English speaking countries.  Some are more formal than others.

If you are asking someone to offer their seat or move their bag so that an older person (or disabled person or a pregnant woman) can sit down on public transportation then I would say "... so this person (or lady or gentleman) can sit down."

If offering your own seat to someone in greater need of it, then get their attention with an "excuse me," (and  "Sir," or "Ma'am"* if you like) and ask "would you like to sit down? "  In German use the formal "sie."

The person who is offered the seat should always say thank you, whether they accept the seat or not.

*It is always a shock the first time you are called Ma'am. or Madam.