What's with these jerk adoptive mothers?

[alexandracabot]

Oprah doesn't even have a show anymore.

[Catey]

 

Earlier in the thread someone posted the most recent inspection report for the daycare.

I did, here is the link https://secure.dss.ca.gov/CareFacilitySearch/Search/DisplayWebReport/103909225?iRptNum=0

 

This is sadly what I have come to regarding this woman, she is not going to get help. SHE is not the one who needs it, THEY are.

She is doing enough for those girls to avoid any type of real encounter, so it would seem. Clean, well dressed (notice all the sweaters that the girls are wearing in the Birthday pic) seem basically fed, takes them for Dr appointments makes some sort of effort at education or at least enough of one to fly under the radar.

She also must have some form of congregation that is supporting her, she mentions that they helped her with letters of reference that were required for a single parent adoption. So even though she is a vile wretched human she is a "Good Christian" woman bravely raising 4 special needs orphans that she "rescued" from a horrible life in an Orphanage, in China no less *gasp*

People are going to also be willing to look the other way when it is someone who is an ABUSER, yet the abuse is not as cut and dry as her beating them while swilling Gin.

Her Fireman (FAD I hate hearing her say that) just bolsters her security, and though it is not said she clearly has some means. International adoption is not cheap, nor are many of the things that she mentions as well as the fact that she lives in a decent sized house.

So to sum up, we have a White Christian woman who has some means, has a long term partner who is a Fireman and a local Church that she must be at least on some level involved with. She is trusted enough by the State to be allowed a permit to care for other children and as you see above when they popped in for a random visit all was well.

Unless there is some other under cover abuse going on I do not think that anything will be done, I think that she has her own little group of leghumpers who validate her enough that no matter what else she hears she will always have them to go to and they will keep telling her everything is OK.

 

 

[littlehouse]

If she doesn't go private by this time next year, I predict that Sissy will be moved to a group home.  She will spin it as she is an adult now, and wanted to be independent.  Not a far stretch to imagine this happening at all.

I might be dreaming, but I am pretty sure at one point there was an entry stating that this is what would happen....at 18 she is an adult.  Could be wrong.

[Eater of Worlds]

If her child really does have auditory processing disorder, that kid should be learning sign language ASAP.  It's also something that is diagnosed with an audiologist.  Has there been any mention of that happening, or does she just think her kids have that?  It's also confused with other things, and I took this from some site as they say it better than me , "For many children and adults with these disorders and others - including mental retardation and sensory integration dysfunction - the listening and comprehension difficulties we often see are due to the higher-order, more global or all-encompassing disorder and not to any specific deficit in the neural processing of auditory stimuli per se. As such, it is not correct to apply the label APD to these individuals, even if many of their behaviors appear very similar to those associated with APD.   She attributes so many of the problems these kids have to conditions and situations that are in her mind or caused by her that I don't know if Jie Jie really has this.

[rosalitta]

I find the "My Firefighter" thing so odd.  I'm assuming he just doesn't want his name on the blog, but I keep having this feeling that Kimmie dreamed of dating Her Firefighter just like she dreamed about having her daughter Apple

[DaffyDill]

I find the "My Firefighter" thing so odd.  I'm assuming he just doesn't want his name on the blog, but I keep having this feeling that Kimmie dreamed of dating Her Firefighter just like she dreamed about having her daughter Apple

I think for her he's the perfect prop to the story of the saintly, long suffering, yet wondrous mother who took in four needy children. Who better than a firefighter, nurse or a paramedic? All occupations that people quite rightly admire for what they do. He's an added bonus.

What an awesomely giving household they are. The sainted mother and the brave firefighter. Couldn't make up anything better.

[Anonymousguest]

When I worked in day care in the early 90s our regulation was 1:8 workers to children under 24m. We were maxed out,  16 kids for 2 of us.  And I was only 20.

[iheartchacos]

But the fireman thinks he's in over his head too. I'm sure I read a post of him having to think long and hard if he could continue dating/handle the needs of all her kid.

How does she get those bangs and parts so dang straight?! Crazy. And has she mentioned Apple's diagnoses? She talks(degrades) the other so much, I maybe have missed it.

[Maggie Mae]

But the fireman thinks he's in over his head too. I'm sure I read a post of him having to think long and hard if he could continue dating/handle the needs of all her kid.

 

How does she get those bangs and parts so dang straight?! Crazy. And has she mentioned Apple's diagnoses? She talks(degrades) the other so much, I maybe have missed it.

Apple has Apert's Syndrome. 

[Mercer]

If she doesn't go private by this time next year, I predict that Sissy will be moved to a group home.  She will spin it as she is an adult now, and wanted to be independent.  Not a far stretch to imagine this happening at all.

Honestly that's probably the best thing that could happen for Sissy at this point, as long as she's placed in a good group home. She would have staff to tend to her needs, and she would have an individualized care plan with her input on what goals she wants to try to achieve. She probably would be able to obtain more community independence and supportive employment. She would also have built in peer support from other young people facing some of the same challenges she is. 

It's even possible that her mother would develop a better ability to bond with her, with the pressures of a daily care burden the mom is struggling to meet removed.

Group home placement isn't necessarily a bad thing. It could benefit Sissy in the long run, as long as she gets into a decent quality program.

[DaffyDill]

Honestly that's probably the best thing that could happen for Sissy at this point, as long as she's placed in a good group home. She would have staff to tend to her needs, and she would have an individualized care plan with her input on what goals she wants to try to achieve. She probably would be able to obtain more community independence and supportive employment. She would also have built in peer support from other young people facing some of the same challenges she is. 

It's even possible that her mother would develop a better ability to bond with her, with the pressures of a daily care burden the mom is struggling to meet removed.

Group home placement isn't necessarily a bad thing. It could benefit Sissy in the long run, as long as she gets into a decent quality program.

It could be a good thing as you say, in a good home, but regarding the bolded, I can totally imagine that Kimi would rarely see her, and probably not have her to stay on weekends or anything, rather than bond more with her. She may even be reluctant to let her go, as she'd lose an unpaid employee in her daycare facility.  She is so self-centred, I just can't see her doing what is best for Sissy, unless it also is to her advantage.

[Taters]

Show her crap to Oprah. She gets things done.

Why don't you do it? She's everywhere, Twitter, Facebook, own website, magazines.

[Antimony]

http://fencingmama.blogspot.com/2011/12/i-kid-you-not.html

This post is also really disturbing - it's along the lines of the post where she feels she has to knock the surgeon down a notch. 

[RosyDaisy]

I would be upset too if a pharmacist got my prescription wrong, but she didn't have to be a bitch about it.

[Antimony]

I would be upset too if a pharmacist got my prescription wrong, but she didn't have to be a bitch about it.

It wasn't even the wrong drug. It was that it should have been pre-mixed by somebody in the back who seemed to have passed over it. 

It sounds like her conversation was just a miscommunication. He thought she thought it was supposed to be a powder, or he dispenses 1000 bottles a day and isn't hyper-familiar with all of their weights. The telling him to not kill somebody is what really gets me. It's so incredibly rude. She also mentions that it was packed so I suspect everybody working the back was also swamped.

[Sera's Arrow]

First she says that she'll mix it at home and how she can do this because she does it for cats and then she lectures HIM about medical mistakes and how HE shouldn't make a mistake with medication that can kill someone? Ooookaaay.

[laPapessaGiovanna]

... She's everywhere...

Like 

 she must be 

[ILoveJellybeans]

Wow, this woman is really horrible. Keeping an eleven year old on a baby leash all day? That is just cruel and abusive. How is it responsible of her to be advertising her business as having her oldest two teenage daughters as her assistants (at about 15 and 17?) and on her blog, she talks about how they have learning disabilities, far behind others their age in maturity, unable to think logically or problem solve and need to be treated like toddlers. That is irresponsible if those girls function at the level that Kim talks about on her blog. They shouldn't be helping out in a daycare, especially unsupervised. Its also obvious how much she favourites Apple. and its creepy how she had been dreaming of "Apple" for years, as an idealised child she would adopt one day. You cant do that with a child, as they are born with personalities, the real child will never live up to the expectations and fantasy of the dream child, because no child is perfect. She may love Apple more now, but I bet she wont feel the same when Apple is a teenager and asserts her independence.

 

[VaSportsMom]

One of the things that I noticed throughout Kimi's blog was her inability to create normal expectations for her children.  All four of these girls have been through an unbelievable amount of physical and emotional trauma and she hasn't managed to adjust her expectations of them at all.  When she first adopted Jie Jie, she didn't lament the fact that Jie Jie felt bad about herself or was in pain due to her feet, no, it was that she'd never be a Prima ballerina.  Even though Jie Jie loved to dance, Kimi didn't see the point in putting her in dance classes unless she could be the best at it and make a career in it.  There was another entry where Kimi was upset that Jie Jie couldn't be a gymnast as talented as one of her friend's daughters.  Never mind that children can be less than stellar at an activity and still reap rewards from engaging in it.  I've sat through tons of boring, badly choreographed dance routines without pointed toes and t-ball games where only one child manages to hit the ball and runs the bases in the wrong order.  And that's okay, because the kids in my family that were involved in those activities made friends, exercised their bodies, engaged in teamwork, worked hard, and learned something about themselves and I will support them in doing that because it's helping them develop into adults.  Her expectations for her girls are just way, way too high, and she has set them up for failure in her own mind.  

I hate parents like this. My oldest is a naturally gifted athlete and shined anytime he had a ball in his hand. My youngest wasn't blessed with that natural talent. He fell in love with soccer at age 4 but everyone thought I was wrong to let him play because he was short, chubby and far from graceful but B wanted to play and that was good enough for me. I fought with many people over the unfair comparisons to his big brother but B never let it bother him. He played on 3 leagues a year and attended every camp around. He's 15 now and is the most versatile player on his varsity team.

I have yet to meet a coach that doesn't prefer B over his brother. Jay's natural talent doesn't compare to B's love of the game and determination. A child that loves what they are doing and is grateful for every opportunity to get their hand (or foot) on the ball can go a long way. B may never be fought over by college teams but he has made life long friends and earned the respect of every coach and teammate he has ever had. You can't put a price on what that does for a child's self esteem and personal growth.

[Mercer]

It could be a good thing as you say, in a good home, but regarding the bolded, I can totally imagine that Kimi would rarely see her, and probably not have her to stay on weekends or anything, rather than bond more with her.

She may not have that option, depending on the program. Where I work, regular family contact is a basic expectation.

[halcionne]

It wasn't even the wrong drug. It was that it should have been pre-mixed by somebody in the back who seemed to have passed over it. 

It sounds like her conversation was just a miscommunication. He thought she thought it was supposed to be a powder, or he dispenses 1000 bottles a day and isn't hyper-familiar with all of their weights. The telling him to not kill somebody is what really gets me. It's so incredibly rude. She also mentions that it was packed so I suspect everybody working the back was also swamped.

Kimi sucks and is clearly an unhappy person who is determined to spread unhappiness to others. I was a pharmacy technician for many years and this episode annoys me. Those medications don't get water added to them until the patient comes to pick them up because they have a very short shelf life once mixed. So there was a miscommunication between the clerk and the pharmacist about whether the drug was ready to be mixed yet, that's all. What a jerk. 

[Jeebusismycopilot]

I  looked at the web page for her day care and all I can say is I would never send my children (hypothetical children) into that centre. 

 

[laPapessaGiovanna]

Kimi sucks and is clearly an unhappy person who is determined to spread unhappiness to others. I was a pharmacy technician for many years and this episode annoys me. Those medications don't get water added to them until the patient comes to pick them up because they have a very short shelf life once mixed. So there was a miscommunication between the clerk and the pharmacist about whether the drug was ready to be mixed yet, that's all. What a jerk. 

Here you have to take home your medication and then add the water and mix. You only have to follow instructions, it's so easy. No one would expect it from the pharmacist and no one, that I know of, ever died for it. She's such an ass.

[foreign fundie]

When I worked in day care in the early 90s our regulation was 1:8 workers to children under 24m. We were maxed out,  16 kids for 2 of us.  And I was only 20.

Wow, how is that even possible? My daughter's day care was 1:3 for under 24 months and 1:2 for little babies. They had maybe seven kids and three care takers. Do you feel looking back you were able to meet the needs of all those kids? And I certainly hope they payed you well. It must have been very demanding on you.

[blessalessi]

It could be a good thing as you say, in a good home, but regarding the bolded, I can totally imagine that Kimi would rarely see her, and probably not have her to stay on weekends or anything, rather than bond more with her. She may even be reluctant to let her go, as she'd lose an unpaid employee in her daycare facility.  She is so self-centred, I just can't see her doing what is best for Sissy, unless it also is to her advantage.

I saw a comment by Kimmie on another terrible adoption blog, where she said that Sissy will need to move to another state in order to get the residential care she requires as an adult.  She spoke about it as if she was considering moving, but facing up to the reality that her family may one day be split up.

Among the Terrible Adopters Club, she seems to be very well regarded.