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Erin & Chad 9: The Paine of it All


samurai_sarah

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I wonder if the move and the distancing has to do with whatever caused UP to cancel BuB? The IBLP documentary coming out, the weird pre-emptive defence on the IBLP website, Paine's leaving IBLP board, and UP jettisoning the Bates? Erin may have sided with the Paines against whatever the current board have done/covered up.

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3 hours ago, Dominionatrix said:

My BEC read is that Erin has struggled with having a less central place in the extended Bates family. She was reportedly the favored daughter growing up, and then for years she was the only local married daughter with kids. Now she’s just one of the crowd. 

Do people really move because they feel badly that they aren't the "favored daughter" anymore? I mean, she might feel badly about such a thing (if that's actually happening). But to pack up, leave a beloved home, uproot your husband's business ALL because she doesn't have favored daughter status anymore? That's a stretch. And why would Chad agree to a move for such an odd, questionable reason? Wouldn't he point out that, while it's regrettable Erin is feeling neglected, that really can't be a reason to uproot a business?

Besides, she has five kids, I doubt she has time to worry about such things. 

There were 19 kids in the Bates house. I doubt Erin is used to being spoiled and getting lots of individual attention. Mostly likely, different kids held the spotlight at different times. I remember when Callie was an adorable toddler, the parents seemed to dote on her. And Zach was pretty important as the oldest and a boy. Jackson, at age 5, was very precocious.

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3 hours ago, Jackie3 said:

Do people really move because they feel badly that they aren't the "favored daughter" anymore? I mean, she might feel badly about such a thing (if that's actually happening). But to pack up, leave a beloved home, uproot your husband's business ALL because she doesn't have favored daughter status anymore? That's a stretch. And why would Chad agree to a move for such an odd, questionable reason? Wouldn't he point out that, while it's regrettable Erin is feeling neglected, that really can't be a reason to uproot a business?

Besides, she has five kids, I doubt she has time to worry about such things. 

There were 19 kids in the Bates house. I doubt Erin is used to being spoiled and getting lots of individual attention. Mostly likely, different kids held the spotlight at different times. I remember when Callie was an adorable toddler, the parents seemed to dote on her. And Zach was pretty important as the oldest and a boy. Jackson, at age 5, was very precocious.

The narrative of Erin being the favorite daughter is based on a AMA of someone that was friends with them as teens and that was her opinion. I think people have to remember that it was a personal opinion and as such can be biased. Someone else that knew them at the time can have a completely diferent perspective of the situation.

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From what i read betweend the lines in that video, they were able to finally get a house , although its located in florida. Maybe chad's grandfather moved into a nursing home or died and it is perfect for them ? I lean more in that direction

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I’m trying to think of all the fundies in Florida. Nurthan, Keller parents, Kori and Drew Wissmann, Campbell and John Morton, some Campanas, Alyssa of course. But none of them besides Alyssa actually hangs out with Erin. 
 

Could they be living with Chad’s grandpa to take care of him and they will get the house in the will?

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4 hours ago, llucie said:

The narrative of Erin being the favorite daughter is based on a AMA of someone that was friends with them as teens and that was her opinion. I think people have to remember that it was a personal opinion and as such can be biased. Someone else that knew them at the time can have a completely diferent perspective of the situation.

I'm sure it could have happened (for her entire chldhood? I don't know). But I don't think an adult Erin would pack up and move just because she lost that status.

In fact, many kids don't like being the favored one. It cold be.a relief to be out of the spotlight.

In any event, with five kids, health issues, two business and all those animals, I doubt she is worrying about whether she is is getting enough attention from Gil and KJ. And moving away in a flounce if she is not!

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15 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

Chad's grandfather is in Florida. They went to visit him last month, it was probably also a preliminary move. Erin mentioned that their current businesses could be moved (and Trace is taking over Chad's existing client base). She has been distancing herself from her family from sometime and now she is moving away 

Are there any clues from their posts about where he lives, or what his name might be?

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Posted (edited)

If he is Chad's paternal gfather then his name is Charles Stephen Paine.

Edited by Bobology
less info
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Posted (edited)
27 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

Are there any clues from their posts about where he lives, or what his name might be?

He lives in Brooksville, Florida. 

Chad's parents house in Oklahoma is up for Sale, so maybe they are also moving to Florida?

Edited by CanadianMamam
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13 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

Are there any clues from their posts about where he lives, or what his name might be?

Someone on Reddit said he lives in Brooksville, which is basically straight north of Tampa/straight west of Orlando. Someone else said Chad/Erin commented on the YT video that they will be about 50 minutes from Alyssa, which would be about right from Alyssa's to Brooksville. It's a fairly rural area that would probably feel similar to where they were living in Tennessee, I think.

Given that Chad is Charles Steven Paine III (and Carson is IV) I assume Chad's paternal grandfather would be Charles Steven Paine as well, but I can't find any properties under that name in Hernando County or any of the surrounding counties. I don't know Chad's mom's maiden name or her parents' names, so either it's Chad's maternal grandfather, it's Chad's paternal grandfather but he doesn't own the property where he lives, or it's Chad's paternal grandfather and he owns the property under some sort of LLC or trust that doesn't include his name. 

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Posted (edited)
2 minutes ago, OHFL2009 said:

Someone on Reddit said he lives in Brooksville, which is basically straight north of Tampa/straight west of Orlando. Someone else said Chad/Erin commented on the YT video that they will be about 50 minutes from Alyssa, which would be about right from Alyssa's to Brooksville. It's a fairly rural area that would probably feel similar to where they were living in Tennessee, I think.

Given that Chad is Charles Steven Paine III (and Carson is IV) I assume Chad's paternal grandfather would be Charles Steven Paine as well, but I can't find any properties under that name in Hernando County or any of the surrounding counties. I don't know Chad's mom's maiden name or her parents' names, so either it's Chad's maternal grandfather, it's Chad's paternal grandfather but he doesn't own the property where he lives, or it's Chad's paternal grandfather and he owns the property under some sort of LLC or trust that doesn't include his name. 

Oops. I misunderstood the post. I found the address but no idea who owns it 

Edited by CanadianMamam
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I did a little more looking during lunch, and it appears that Chad's paternal grandfather (Charles Steven Paine, Sr.) was President of the Wesleyan Bible Conference Association from 2006-2012. The WBCA developed and runs a "Christian retirement community" located in Brooksville called Wesleyan Village. It appears to be a combination of single family homes, apartment buildings and trailer/mobile homes. I'm guessing Chad's grandfather lives in community owned housing and that's why his name isn't on any property records. 

If he does live there, Chad and Erin would not be able to take over his home, since the community is 55+. But maybe he found them a connection to buy property elsewhere in the area. It also looks like Chad's parents' home in Oklahoma is for sale, so maybe they are moving to Florida too? 

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6 minutes ago, OHFL2009 said:

I did a little more looking during lunch, and it appears that Chad's paternal grandfather (Charles Steven Paine, Sr.) was President of the Wesleyan Bible Conference Association from 2006-2012. The WBCA developed and runs a "Christian retirement community" located in Brooksville called Wesleyan Village. It appears to be a combination of single family homes, apartment buildings and trailer/mobile homes. I'm guessing Chad's grandfather lives in community owned housing and that's why his name isn't on any property records. 

https://wesleyanvillage.org/

Maybe grandfather is moving to a nursing home or similar, Chad's parents are taking over his house in Wesleyan Village? The houses are dirt cheap.

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If the retirement village is expanding, maybe Chad secured a contract to do the building. That would address the issue of establishing his business in a new area. 

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Posted (edited)

Chad’s parents are over 55 so they could move into the community. I think all their kids are adults now. Although I think 2 boys are not yet married. 

Edited by JermajestyDuggar
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If TN wasn't already super conservative, I'd speculate they were moving for political reasons. Maybe they also just want to be closer to Chad's family - didn't Chad's mom help out a lot when Erin had COVID? Perhaps they are slightly healthier than the Bates'? Kind of like the Dillard situation?

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Posted (edited)

I’m thinking they are going to “buy” grandpas house and be his carer 

Edited by AussieKrissy
Well further reading if he is in over 55 that is out. Lol
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8 hours ago, neuroticcat said:

If TN wasn't already super conservative, I'd speculate they were moving for political reasons. Maybe they also just want to be closer to Chad's family - didn't Chad's mom help out a lot when Erin had COVID? Perhaps they are slightly healthier than the Bates'? Kind of like the Dillard situation?

Paines have a lot of children too (maybe 8?), so not sure they can focus on helping Erin and Chad.

With "healthier" do you mean emotionally healthier? They are not. The father has hiden Gothard abuse, has brainwashed young women into thinking abuse is not bad and was ok with her daughter marrying a rapist!

 

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According to fundie wikie, 

  • the Paines have 10 kids (which I actually remembered. Erin and Chad had said they had assumed they would have at least 10 kids.)
  • Most of them are boys
  • Most of them are married and all of the kids are adults
  • Chad's father is 61 and his mother is almost 58.

Not on fundie wiki, but someone here discovered that Chad's father left the board sometime in 2020.

I hope Erin and Chad are able to move. They really need more room!

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3 hours ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

I hope Erin and Chad are able to move. They really need more room!

I hope they aren't living in the RV.

On 5/20/2022 at 11:43 AM, llucie said:

The narrative of Erin being the favorite daughter is based on a AMA of someone that was friends with them as teens and that was her opinion. I think people have to remember that it was a personal opinion and as such can be biased. Someone else that knew them at the time can have a completely diferent perspective of the situation.

I followed the old blog and Erin was clearly the favourite girl. Kelly and Gil considered her music practice very important and she had less chores than the others, in order to study music. Alyssa and Michaela were maids, Erin wasn't. Erin was constantly portrayed as the most pious, the best pianist, the prettiest etc. 

I'm not sure if she is hurt because she is getting less attention since her sisters are adults and becoming Kelly's "best friends" and marrying. I doubt it... Erin seems comfortable in her position, she's the queen of her own house now. If Erin is is distancing from the Bates, it must be because something else.  

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The Paines may have 10 kids but that’s 9 less than the Bateses. And all their kids are grown. I would think just going by numbers, the Paines have more time to give to Erin and Chad if they lived closer. 

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Posted (edited)
On 5/19/2022 at 7:17 PM, CanadianMamam said:

I think she gave a lot to her family because she is a perfection and had a hard time seeing things down half-assed, so she took over but that is not sustainable and I think she and Chad had hard conversations about stepping back.

What did Erin take over for Gil and KJ? I don't see her doing anything for them, but I may have missed it. Do you mean she drives over there with the kids and does projects?

About the move--if Chad's business were booming and he was making a ton of money, I don't think they'd be moving.

Edited by Jackie3
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In the beginning, Chad did A LOT for. Kj and Gil.

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37 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

In the beginning, Chad did A LOT for. Kj and Gil.

The OP was talking about Erin

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6 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

I hope they aren't living in the RV.

I followed the old blog and Erin was clearly the favourite girl. Kelly and Gil considered her music practice very important and she had less chores than the others, in order to study music. Alyssa and Michaela were maids, Erin wasn't. Erin was constantly portrayed as the most pious, the best pianist, the prettiest etc. 

I'm not sure if she is hurt because she is getting less attention since her sisters are adults and becoming Kelly's "best friends" and marrying. I doubt it... Erin seems comfortable in her position, she's the queen of her own house now. If Erin is is distancing from the Bates, it must be because something else.  

Well yes, but being considered the most pius, the best etc can be a curse too. And practicing piano all the time is not exactly something most kids would love, even if they are good at it. We dont know how Erin felt about that and how that afected her relationship with her parents. She doesnt seem that close to them at the moment.

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