Maxwell 41: Taking a Short Vest Rest

[Odd1Out]

4 hours ago, freethemall said:

I almost wonder if the "girls" are overjoyed to have the parents out of the house. I hope they're staying up all night having dance parties and shucking bean burritos and schedules out the window, eating whatever they want whenever they want, talking about dicks and planning their escape. One can dream. 

You almost wonder if Steve puts up Nanny Cams to see what they’re doing. 

[freejugar]

Imagine being an adult and having to climb a bunk bed everynight.

[Coconut Flan]

Do they even know how odd that is?

[Bethy]

3 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

Do they even know how odd that is?

Possibly no, because they're so sheltered. But if they do know, I guarantee they've been told it's a special blessing and favor that only they have, unlike the heathens who kick their children to the curb (and the eeeevil world) as soon as they turn 18. Their parents LET them stay in the family home...forever...see the spin?

[HoneyBunny]

18 hours ago, SPHASH said:

The unmarrieds needing a sitter reminds me of when I was 18, it was the summer I graduated HS and was living at home and had a job until it was time to move out for college in the fall.  My parents took an overnight trip and were gone less than 24 hours.  My stupid grandmother asks if I needed her to come over and stay with me like I was five years old or something.  Bitch.

In your grandma’s defense, I have almost 17 year old twin boys in my life and, even now that they’re driving, they still like me to stay with them in their McMansion of a house when their folks are gone for awhile (granted, not for 24 hours though).  At some point very soon, if we’re not already there, they’ll be asking me to stay for my benefit, not theirs. 
 

And that’s why I love them. ?

[SPHASH]

6 hours ago, calliopecassandra said:

How many letters? Every answer I'm thinking of is more than one word

 

Two letters, starts with N and ends with O.

[grammyj]

So I know that the daughiters were given the alternative to stay at home and continue to be "sheltered" from the world by T and S or leave home at 18.

If they had left home at 18, which of course they couldn't do because they had no practical social skill-set, would that have meant they were cut off from the family? As in, you chose to leave your godly family so good bye, dont let the door hit you on the way out.  Or would they make new lives but always be welcomed back home to visit.

If it is the former, which I believe it is, it is the worst emotional blackmail. But I've never been sure.

 

[calliopecassandra]

3 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Two letters, starts with N and ends with O.

Ugh I swear I can read lol. I saw you say it was one word but I don't consider no to be rude. I was thinking you said h no or f no. 

[anachronistic]

When I was 25, living with my mom, I came home to a burglar. I was very traumatized and it took me a good year or so to be able to stay overnight alone again, despite having done it for weeks before when my mom traveled. And due to my disabilities I haven’t followed the traditional American path to independence, but I did move out to live with roommates 5 years ago and.....(drumroll) I have now, at 36, just 16 days ago moved in to my own apartment (my OWN, nobody else!) in a low income/disabled/senior housing complex.

It. Is. AMAZING.

Really Sarah has no idea what she is missing. I am so joyful that it is hard to sleep. Decorating and shopping are so much fun but even cleaning is fun. I still see my mom and family all the time but I’m genuinely confused as to how your love for someone can transcend the marvel that is *living alone* and basically why anyone would ever want a live in partner.

I could go on all day about this but damn. Steve deprived every single one of his kids this joy. That is just so terrible. I feel so sorry for them.

[browngrl]

It wasn't until I started my second residency that I moved into my own place to live alone. When I was at home I shared a room with my sisters and when I left for university, I shared space with roommates. I remember sitting down on the sofa after the movers left and after I'd cleaned up and thinking "what now?". I considered all the exciting things I could do but I was paralyzed by all the choice and the next day was going to be a busy one so in the end I did my usual routine. 

I suspect that The Maxwell daughters are have  been hobbled by Steve so they do their routine or they are paralyzed by choice as I was and do their routine. Luckily for me I had lots of time and opportunity to do new things but I don't think the girls are as lucky. I hope that at the very least they treat themselves to TWO or maybe even THREE animal crackers and if things get really wild a Pepsi.

[Dominionatrix]

I'm guessing that while Steve and Teri are gone "the girls" will have a night with homemade pizzas, perhaps make a pan of brownies, and maybe even go out for a round of mochas after their normal run. Other than that, they'll likely stick to their routine.

Still, they're not used to it being only them around the dinner table. I do wonder what they talk about, and if it changes when they're alone. Maybe there will be some sharing of hearts (and minds). Maybe not.

[crunchycarrots]

On 8/19/2020 at 6:29 PM, Bethy said:

Is it too much to hope that they sneak out and buy a burner phone and a few GB of data and start researching things like "spiritual abuse" and "problems with patriarchy"?

I was secretly hoping they'd sneak out, buy a burner phone, and find a guy on Tinder. ?

[mango_fandango]

I’m still living with my parents, but I did go to university. So while I had that support system, particularly in first year when I lived in university halls, it’s still more than what the Maxwell sisters have ever done. I even lived abroad for ten months in my third year (which I found difficult in many ways, but I got through it!) 

[lilith]

1 hour ago, crunchycarrots said:

I was secretly hoping they'd sneak out, buy a burner phone, and find a guy on Tinder. ?

How sad is it that even making a profile on a Christian dating site is forbidden for those “girls”, one of whom is only a year younger than me, a twice married mother of four.

[JordynDarby5]

13 hours ago, Howl said:

I can easily see Terri swilling an entire Pepsi.

I certainly hope so. Chug those Pepsis Teri! Chug them by the liter! I have learned this year that I certainly couldn't and wouldn't give up my Pepsi (or coke) for any man. I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes this year and its been hard giving up my Pepsi. Thankfully I can still have one just not all the time. But going from one a day (which I had been so proud of myself for getting down to one a day for the last couple years) to one everyone once in awhile has been hard. The other night I was watching the First 48 at the detectives were questioning a suspect but my eyes kept going to the Pepsi can on the table. My husband telling me to quit my Pepsi would have been met with a no and then walk if he didn't accept it. 

[lilith]

8 minutes ago, JordynDarby5 said:

I certainly hope so. Chug those Pepsis Teri! Chug them by the liter! I have learned this year that I certainly couldn't and wouldn't give up my Pepsi (or coke) for any man. I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes this year and its been hard giving up my Pepsi. Thankfully I can still have one just not all the time. But going from one a day (which I had been so proud of myself for getting down to one a day for the last couple years) to one everyone once in awhile has been hard. The other night I was watching the First 48 at the detectives were questioning a suspect but my eyes kept going to the Pepsi can on the table. My husband telling me to quit my Pepsi would have been met with a no and then walk if he didn't accept it. 

Once you’ve been a Pepsi holic you can’t just have one cup. Get in touch with Teri, she’ll walk you through the 12 steps. The first step is giving up your will to your pathologically controlling husband. I think the last step is resigning yourself to a joyless life in the hope that Jesus will schedule you a spot in eternity. Enjoy! (but not too much).

Edited August 21, 2020 by lilith

[allyisyourpally5]

10 hours ago, grammyj said:

So I know that the daughiters were given the alternative to stay at home and continue to be "sheltered" from the world by T and S or leave home at 18.

If they had left home at 18, which of course they couldn't do because they had no practical social skill-set, would that have meant they were cut off from the family? As in, you chose to leave your godly family so good bye, dont let the door hit you on the way out.  Or would they make new lives but always be welcomed back home to visit.

If it is the former, which I believe it is, it is the worst emotional blackmail. But I've never been sure.

 

When Anna did a post about why she wasn’t going to college, there was a part that really stuck out for me which makes me think that all the “children” were victims of constant yet possibly subtle emotional blackmail.

Anna talked about how hard her parents had worked so hard to shelter her from bad influences of the world (exact phrasing forgotten would have to find post) and then stated “why would I want to go to college and undo everything my parents have done for me?”

You can picture it easily. Just the odd line dropped here and there whilst they did school work “just think if you were in an unsaved family and were pushed out to learn with unbelievers, you may not be saved anymore”

” you don’t want to go to college and sin after everything we’ve done for you do you?”

[Joe Pukepail]

On 8/16/2020 at 3:40 PM, mango_fandango said:

Yeah, Steve is always so rude in his comment replies. Teri and Sarah make more of an effort. 

I've known a lot of engineer types, and many of them were very direct, almost curt. Only a couple of them would have been so rude to someone who politely asked a well-intentioned question. Wtf, Steve?

It's bizarre to read his abrupt responses to these women who are really almost fawning over the family he feels he has built singlehandedly. It's upsetting, and I probably don't even like any of the commenters much more than I like Steve or Teri. He has to have hurt some feelings during the time they were actively touring if that is his usual response style. If you don't want to answer questions about something, maybe you should keep it off your stupid blog, Steve.

[Melissa1977]

17 hours ago, freejugar said:

Imagine being an adult and having to climb a bunk bed everynight.

I only imagine an adult sleeping in a bunk bed if they were sailors or prison immates. Oh wait...

[freejugar]

how old is Mary?

[nvmbr02]

14 minutes ago, freejugar said:

how old is Mary?

24 today, I believe. 

[allyisyourpally5]

Haha actually a couple of my friends slept in bunks last year when we went to a cabin for a vacation - 8 of us, and one of the rooms at bunks. It was quite funny. 
 

Funnily enough the coin toss was to NOT sleep up top.....as kids it was the opposite

[nvmbr02]

5 minutes ago, allyisyourpally5 said:

Haha actually a couple of my friends slept in bunks last year when we went to a cabin for a vacation - 8 of us, and one of the rooms at bunks. It was quite funny. 
 

Funnily enough the coin toss was to NOT sleep up top.....as kids it was the opposite

Yep, when my two co troop leaders and I took my daughter's girl scout troop to camp the leader's room (attached to the main cabin but a separate area with a curtain) had 2 sets of bunk beds. Most troops only had two leaders so the tops bunks are just extra beds but our troop was large so we had the three of us. I was the youngest leader by about 5 years so i got voted up top. Getting up wasn't bad but I was a bit scared going back down. ?

[Bethy]

4 hours ago, allyisyourpally5 said:

When Anna did a post about why she wasn’t going to college, there was a part that really stuck out for me which makes me think that all the “children” were victims of constant yet possibly subtle emotional blackmail.

Anna talked about how hard her parents had worked so hard to shelter her from bad influences of the world (exact phrasing forgotten would have to find post) and then stated “why would I want to go to college and undo everything my parents have done for me?”

You can picture it easily. Just the odd line dropped here and there whilst they did school work “just think if you were in an unsaved family and were pushed out to learn with unbelievers, you may not be saved anymore”

” you don’t want to go to college and sin after everything we’ve done for you do you?”

I absolutely believe this. Who were the FJers who went and saw the Maxes when they still had the dog and pony show? (I think they were the ones that humped Uriah in the parking lot on the way out, for good measure.) They approached at least Mary letting her know that there's life outside Maxhell and her parents' way of thinking, and she actually made a heart with her hands and said "I love my daddy." They're convinced that Steve and Teri are sacrificing to do the very best thing for them, not to hold them back and cripple them emotionally to the point where they could never make a break for it even if the opportunity presented itself. 

And how about the legacy Steve and Teri are leaving for their children when it comes to marriage and relationships? They regard Steve as a hero for deciding to get the reversal so the youngest five would exist. But surely Sarah is old enough to remember, and remember well, how bad off Teri was in Sarah's youngest days...and then for the next decade or so as her mother battled postpartum depression over and over (or continuously) while all of the Reversals arrived, with nothing more than a strict schedule and some topical hormone cream to treat the depression. So what did she learn? True love forces the woman to do what's killing her, over and over and over. She saw her mom hold her tongue when it was time to order pizza, and even if Sarah doesn't remember the event, surely she edited/formatted/posted the Corner it's featured in. So what did she learn? True reverence for your husband means you won't even remind him of the thing he promised to do. You'll do without if he forgets. She's old enough to remember all the chapters of the Pepsi Chronicles. So what did she learn? True love takes away the one thing that offers a modicum of enjoyment in the wife's life.  She saw her brothers pulled out of sports they enjoyed, the TV removed from the family's home, and various siblings banned from playing instruments that they enjoyed. So what did she learn? A truly loving father will arbitrarily remove anything that is pleasant.

It's possible, after all that, that they don't want to leave the mothership. Marriage is the only means they have to leave, and for all they put on the blog about their parents faithfully loving each other, I don't know that it looks appealing enough to be better than living like perpetual teenagers in their bunk beds - especially considering that Steve is the gatekeeper who will decide who the girls would be permitted to marry - meaning, someone just like him.

It's a whole other level of tragedy. They're stuck being forever children, sad because they're missing out on marriage and motherhood which is all they've been trained to ever want, yet they know they aren't in a position to ever be happily married, if they're ever even allowed to marry at all. And Sarah is in the same boat, even as she closes in on 40.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

Is anyone else kind of surprised they have been open about Teri's depression?  

I'd think this would be the kind of thing they would keep to themselves and present as a shiny, happy, thrilled to be homeschooling mom.

Don't get me wrong, I am not advocating for depression be hidden and stigmatized....I'm just trying to figure out why they have been open to sharing this when it's pretty out of character for them.