Seriously Steve 2: She Was a Woman, So She Probably F*cked Up Somewhere

[Bajovane]

I ran across an old meme that still makes me laugh (think I could find it again? Sigh...)

 

A guy is asking another guy if he had found Jesus yet and other guy explodes "What?! He's lost AGAIN?!  Jesus. H. Christ, someone should put a bell on him or something!!"

I am so going to do that the next time someone tries that crap with me.  

[anniebgood]

On 9/2/2020 at 5:21 AM, Joe Pukepail said:

...this is what we said in junior high when we were insecure about being girls who played ice hockey. Is your stepbrother a junior high girl?

Sometimes I thought so. I haven't spoken to him since we sold my mom's house. He's going to be on my everlasting shit list. 

[IsmeWeatherwax]

Both my girls choose to not do their confirmation. They just didnt want to do the saturday classes. I did ask them to reconsider but I made it clear it was choice. Their Catholic secondary school ran the classes, but mon-fri having to bus and then train to and from school was plenty enough for them and they didnt want that again on their days off lol

 

[CyborgKin]

On 9/4/2020 at 2:29 AM, Bajovane said:

I ran across an old meme that still makes me laugh (think I could find it again? Sigh...)

 

A guy is asking another guy if he had found Jesus yet and other guy explodes "What?! He's lost AGAIN?!  Jesus. H. Christ, someone should put a bell on him or something!!"

I am so going to do that the next time someone tries that crap with me.  

Reminds me of this short sketch (spoiler for large)

Spoiler

 

(there's also a sequel)

[lilith]

On 7/1/2019 at 6:17 PM, MamaJunebug said:

This can’t be Steve — all his neighbors are family.... unless..... oh, Gigi, you scamp!  

Well she does wear pants. And we all know that’s the first step to harlotry and debauchery.

[fundiefan]

Just read Stevie boy's 9/2 "Seriously". 

The boy just regurgitates bible verses with a sentence or two trying to make some sort of connection. 

Do people really pay for that sh*t? I mean, aside from the fact that it's free right there on the website? Do people actually ask for that trash to hit their Inbox?

[Coconut Flan]

No, the email subscription is free.  He's blathering because either he likes to or he hasn't figured out how to gracefully retire from doing his columns.  He probably still enjoys trying to tell people how to live.

[Jana814]

7 minutes ago, Coconut Flan said:

  He probably still enjoys trying to tell people how to live.

He defiantly likes to tell people how to live & shames them for not raising them the way his kids were raised.   

[Bluebirdbluebell]

His new post is very soft for Steve. It's also short and sweet, but it's feels missing a few things. 

[fundiefan]

6 hours ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

His new post is very soft for Steve. It's also short and sweet, but it's feels missing a few things. 

Apparently, one needs religion and some interpretation of a 2,000 year old book in order to treat people with respect and dignity and be a decent human being. And, really, if you need religion to tell you to be nice to your spouse, you're doing life wrong. 

[SPHASH]

Ugly as Sin is today's Seriously topic:

Have you ever seen lambs frolicking in a field? They are the picture of innocence. Now picture a lamb that is being used to pay for your sin, because you broke God’s law. The knife is applied to his neck, and his blood is poured out because of your sin. 

In my Bible reading I just read of the Levitical animal sacrifices again. Had I lived in Old Testament times, it would have been difficult for me to have my sin cause the death of an innocent lamb in such a bloody, graphic way. Yet, I would have been grateful there was a remedy for my sin.

Edited September 30, 2020 by SPHASH
Formatting

[Hane]

25 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Ugly as Sin is today's Seriously topic:

Have you ever seen lambs frolicking in a field? They are the picture of innocence. Now picture a lamb that is being used to pay for your sin, because you broke God’s law. The knife is applied to his neck, and his blood is poured out because of your sin. 

In my Bible reading I just read of the Levitical animal sacrifices again. Had I lived in Old Testament times, it would have been difficult for me to have my sin cause the death of an innocent lamb in such a bloody, graphic way. Yet, I would have been grateful there was a remedy for my sin.

Gee, Steve—I’d find it a lot more productive to understand what I’d done wrong, make reparations, and strive to do better.

[Alisamer]

On 9/3/2020 at 12:29 PM, Bajovane said:

A guy is asking another guy if he had found Jesus yet and other guy explodes "What?! He's lost AGAIN?!  Jesus. H. Christ, someone should put a bell on him or something!!"

I am so going to do that the next time someone tries that crap with me.  

At DragonCon for pretty much the entire 17 years I went there was a guy who dressed as Jesus the entire time. The whole weekend you'd occasionally hear conversations like these:

*Very serious concerned face* "Have you found Jesus?"

"Oh, yeah, I saw him dancing at the Crüxshadows concert last night, and then later at the drum circle. Not sure where he is now, though, maybe at one of the Star Wars panels?"

[fundiefan]

Um, wasn't Jesus hung on the cross to die for Steve's sins?

[usmcmom]

The passenger in this car?  My daughter can imitate her perfectly throughout this movie. I find it hilarious: 

https://youtu.be/zyrnCjW7YMA

P.S. The movie is “New in Town,” if anybody wants to watch something fun. 

[Bluebirdbluebell]

Steve wants our thoughts on this guys:

Mankind has been made with an innate need/desire to worship. What do you see people  worshipping today? How would you define worship?

I’ll read all of your responses when you reply to this email.  

I'm sure some of you are subscribed, but we can still leave responses here.

Edited October 8, 2020 by Bluebirdbluebell

[Black Aliss]

34 minutes ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

Steve wants our thoughts on this guys:

Mankind has been made with an innate need/desire to worship. What do you see people  worshipping today? How would you define worship?

I’ll read all of your responses when you reply to this email.  

I'm sure some of you are subscribed, but we can still leave responses here.

I guess I wasn't in the room when god handed out the innate need/desire to worship. Because I can't remember a time in my entire life when I experienced that need. I do feel a spiritual connection to something-or-other when I'm out in nature, especially in the mountains, and my friends and joke about going to church when we hike on Sundays, but that's all I got.

[fundiefan]

I actually feel an aversion to anything resembling worship, never mind some innate desire to do so. 

This is just another of Stevie's attempts to feel superior. "Everyone has an innate need/desire to worship and you ignore it but I am so very special I dedicate my life to it! It makes Jesus happy and I am very special to him because of it".

[Bluebirdbluebell]

huh. I'm weird I guess. I do have some instincts to worship.

What Steve is looking for are "new idols" to condemn:

You neighbor "worships" a local sports franchise. That's a column for Seriously Steve.

Your best friend constantly talks about her favorite musician. That's a column for Seriously Steve.

You teenage son does everything as fast as possible so he can spend all his free time playing video games. A Seriously Steve column on worshipping video games.

etc.

Steve may read enough news (as the headship) to hear milennials don't necessarily own a television, and sports are good idol to talk about, but he needs to be more in touch with the modern world so he demonize today's idols. 

[Giraffe]

Steve’s comments about worship shows he probably believes what a lot of fundies do, that there aren’t any real atheists. Atheists know full well Steve’s god exists but we refuge to acknowledge him. I put the verse under the spoiler but it’s the one I’ve heard it used to prove to atheists they’re not really atheists, they only think they are. 

Spoiler

Romans 1:19 Because that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for God hath shewed it unto them.

 

[fundiefan]

1 hour ago, Giraffe said:

Steve’s comments about worship shows he probably believes what a lot of fundies do, that there aren’t any real atheists. Atheists know full well Steve’s god exists but we refuge to acknowledge him. I put the verse under the spoiler but it’s the one I’ve heard it used to prove to atheists they’re not really atheists, they only think they are. 

  Hide contents

Romans 1:19 Because that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for God hath shewed it unto them.

 

And that holds as much water to an atheist as the whole "the bible proves the bible" thing. 

Their bible is relevant to them, not to atheists/non Christians. Just as if someone quoted the Quran to them. But, of course, they're too arrogant to have any understanding of that at all. 

[thoughtful]

On 9/3/2020 at 12:29 PM, Bajovane said:

A guy is asking another guy if he had found Jesus yet and other guy explodes "What?! He's lost AGAIN?!  Jesus. H. Christ, someone should put a bell on him or something!!"

I am so going to do that the next time someone tries that crap with me.  

If your dog is with you, she can serve as the perfect fellow actor in this drama:

"Lassie, Jesus is down the well again! Let's go save him, girl!"

[Bluebirdbluebell]

I think Steve believes everyone worships something, so if you don't worship God, you worship something else. Hence his search for false idols to knock down.

He seems to have serious problems with the idea of moderation. If someone does something, they must do to excess. If someone really like or respects another person/celebrity, they must be worshipping them (according to Steve). 

P.S. Steve, since you're looking for Idols to condemn, you might condemn the worship of Pres. Trump. Some people are making an idol of him and worshipping him. Some have even called him the second coming, which I find blasphemous. 

Edited October 9, 2020 by Bluebirdbluebell

[CyborgKin]

On 10/1/2020 at 4:02 AM, fundiefan said:

Um, wasn't Jesus hung on the cross to die for Steve's sins?

You'd think he'd find that more significant and life-changing than a baby sheep.  People eat lamb every day.

[HeartsAFundie]

On 10/8/2020 at 10:03 PM, Bluebirdbluebell said:

I think Steve believes everyone worships something, so if you don't worship God, you worship something else. Hence his search for false idols to knock down.

He seems to have serious problems with the idea of moderation. If someone does something, they must do to excess. If someone really like or respects another person/celebrity, they must be worshipping them (according to Steve). 

P.S. Steve, since you're looking for Idols to condemn, you might condemn the worship of Pres. Trump. Some people are making an idol of him and worshipping him. Some have even called him the second coming, which I find blasphemous. 

Steve would love this one; the hardcore Trumpers have referred to Trump as GEOTUS-God Emperor Of The United States.  If you google GEOTUS in relation to Trump, it is used by supporters "in a semi-joking way".  I didn't even know GEOTUS was a thing until my son told me about it.