Maxwell 22: Maxhell University Coursework

[mango_fandango]

I have seen a few LPs, but I wouldn’t know how to do one myself. I do have a fundie Sims blog on here, though. 

[SPHASH]

12 hours ago, socalrules said:

I just saw an episode of Mama’s Family where Mama bit into a sandwich and realized someone left the plastic on the cheese. I immediately thought of the Maxwells, although I am sure Teri was nowhere near as funny as Mama. 

I bet it was Naomi

[Dru]

Hi everyone,

Just want to reintroduce myself since I've been gone forever. I'm not into fundies in general, but I got into the Maxwells when SA invaded the forum back in the day. And no, I don't wish to discuss SA or my (previous?)membership there at all.

 

I've been following along for a couple of months after being on hiatus and having my account go inactive. I had a momsboard account and emailed with terri privately many times. I in no way think I'm an expert, just here to give my input and go along for the ride.

 

P.S. I'm a little drunk right now so...

[johnhugh]

New post is up.

Hi Stevie! 

[Eternalbluepearl]

3 hours ago, johnhugh said:

New post is up.

Hi Stevie! 

Wow I can't believe Sarah responded to why she doesn't own a house. It struck me that it's really easy to say "the Lord has not led me to" about anything! Sorry, God didn't tell me to. *Shrug* That christian language is so strange to me sometimes. I've never heard anyone in real life talk this way, just blogs and fundie reality shows.

[anjulibai]

Oh Sarah, you sadden me so.

[freethemall]

Looks like Sarah made some typos, here I fixed it!

"My dad has not led me to, and will not allow me to own a house."

Plain and simple indeed! 

[Lgirlrocks]

If she doesn’t want to own a home she could always rent one or an appartment. I know she won’t do either. It’s so sad. She’s in her thirties and has never been on her own. She’s probably never spent the night away from home by herself. What kind of life is that? I truly hope, but doubt, that it is her choice to stay at home.

[Foudeb]

"Please note: this is only meant to respond to the questions, and I won’t approve comments that are negative or debating why I’ve made this choice!"

So on some level she is indeed aware that being a sad SAHD in her late thirties doing unpaid work on her brothers' businesses and earning pocket money with badly written self-published drivel is... not an ideal life. One that people will criticise her for anyway. 

Sarah, if you read here, we don't blame you. We only want a better life for you. And independence (financial, emotional etc) is a big milestone in achieving happiness. 

It is also unfair that your brothers are being allowed that option when you are not. You are in every way as capable, clever and strong as they are. You parents may tell you otherwise, but they are wrong. 

[Anonymousguest]

On 7/13/2018 at 5:19 AM, LilMissMetaphor said:

Sarah, you loon, what even IS this? Now mornings are evil? Is there a statistically higher chance of something fun happening in the morning that makes it worthy of avoiding? 

I actually can relate to this. If I have an appointment or something in the morning I feel like my whole day is shot. I have a lot of trouble getting back on track and getting stuff done. This was especially true for homeschooling. We never had a schedule, but did have a routine. And if that routine was interrupted in the morning we didn't get school done that day. I tried to only schedule stuff in the afternoon after school was done for that reason. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Well that post came off quite defensive. 

It’s obvious she thinks she’s free as a bird with the life she wants to lead. How incredibly sad. 

[usedbicycle]

Is Sarah obtuse or just pretending that she doesn't understand the question?

No one cares that she likes to write and hates remodeling. Everyone wants to know under which circumstances she would ever  leave her parents, and her answer is not very optimistic. 

The real reason she can't buy an apartment is because men provide for women, women don't provide for themselves. That would be highly offensive to all men who are insecure about their manhood and use tight financial control to exert their power over women (hi Stevie!).

 

[LurkerOverThePond]

Ok, now what is this "mission trip" she talks about??? A visit at the state fair dressed as Lolly the Fucking Clown? Or is she going to talk at some "young women's" gathering?

[IReallyAmHopewell]

Right, Sarah. I'm so believing you!  NOT.

Hands up if the answer to this "question" shocks you? I didn't think so.

Most disingenuous blog post ever!

[The Mother Dust]

On 7/14/2018 at 12:57 PM, The Mother Dust said:

This reference is so perfect, you have to take it to it's conclusion!  "We are the Borg  Maxwells.  You will be assimilated.  Your culture will adapt to service us.  Resistance is futile." 

For non-trekkies:

Spoiler

 

Can you picture this voice coming out of Steve's mouth 

@MakeitSew  I see you  LOL 

[Koala]

She's a 36 year old woman, and her parents monitor her cell phone.  Of course she can't own a house!  What a silly idea!   She needs free time to watch her brothers live their lives.

Steve and Terry?  You've robbed her.  Pure and simple, you are stealing her life away.  Shame on you both.

[SPHASH]

Coward Steve has brainwashed his daughters into thinking the world is evil.  Poor Sarah is so afraid of the world she won't even sit next to a man on a flight.  She also couldn't handle a sleepover at a friend's house when she was an adolescent.

She reminds me of a cousin of mine who at 60 still lives with her mom.  She tried to move out when she was in her early 20s, got an apartment 12 miles away from home and moved back home after few weeks cuz she was homesick.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Sarah says she doesn’t want to be independent from her family. 

Well it seems her brothers want to be independent from her. And one day her parents will die and it might be 20 years before her. So if her parents never prepare her to be independent, what is she to do when her parents are dead? How will she cope with being alone? Especially if Steve allows her sisters to marry.

[MamaJunebug]

3 hours ago, Anonymousguest said:

I actually can relate to this. If I have an appointment or something in the morning I feel like my whole day is shot. I have a lot of trouble getting back on track and getting stuff done. This was especially true for homeschooling. We never had a schedule, but did have a routine. And if that routine was interrupted in the morning we didn't get school done that day. I tried to only schedule stuff in the afternoon after school was done for that reason. 

See, I'm exactly the opposite.  If I know an appointment is coming up in the afternoon, I can't get into anything in the morning.  Afraid I'll forget the appointment or won't get as good a start as I should on a project, or fluff the project entirely in my distraction.  This morning I had a dentist appointment (second-least-favorite thing to the GYN) and just now my 12 noon caller came and went early.  I'm deliriously happy about that -- but marking time until my 3:30.

It's counterintuitive, but if I have nothing scheduled for the afternoon, I can get vast tracts of land covered by noon and have the afternoon to relax, read, shop, visit...

In truth, Poor Sarah and her coterie just don't want women to Go Out.  Ever.  

3 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Sarah says she doesn’t want to be independent from her family. 

Well it seems her brothers want to be independent from her. And one day her parents will die and it might be 20 years before her. So if her parents never prepare her to be independent, what is she to do when her parents are dead? How will she cope with being alone? Especially if Steve allows her sisters to marry.

She conflates what we would call "having a life of her own" with what she terms "being independent of her family." Those are loaded words  -- well, both phrases are, but for this discussion, the latter.  Define independence; how much is too much, etc.

By the same token, we shoot ourselves in the foot occasionally (and yes, I have a couple of mini-me's in my pocket, thus the "we" and "us") when we say she has "no life of her own."  Of course she does, everyone does.  Some choose, or are forced, to spend their lives in unpaid servitude.  What we [sic] mean to say is, "Do you ever feel sad that you've never loved (chastely, of course) nor been loved by a man?  Have you felt at all disappointed that you have not become a mom? If so, how have you handled that?"

PS is well and truly assimilated into the borg and like a little piggy, happy in her sty.  I, for one, shall put her out of my thoughts, as obviously she disdains the thought of me having them.  Enjoy your life as you know it, PSarah.  Some have worse than you, some -- IMHO -- better. You do you, girlfriend.

[BullyJBG]

23 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Sarah says she doesn’t want to be independent from her family. 

Well it seems her brothers want to be independent from her. And one day her parents will die and it might be 20 years before her. So if her parents never prepare her to be independent, what is she to do when her parents are dead? How will she cope with being alone? Especially if Steve allows her sisters to marry.

It's been said that she then would have the house. She's flown alone, but as for sleeping away from home, she's been on trips to visit friends, but that's as close as it comes. She came across as, that she has enough work that, when Steve and Teri die, she'd be able to manage. She'd probably get lonely being home alone, though. Probably the siblings and nieces/nephews would take turns coming over for a meal with her every day. Assuming none of them move outside of their vicinity.

[Palimpsest]

5 minutes ago, BullyJBG said:

It's been said that she then would have the house.

Yes.  Steve claimed that if the daughters never married then they would inherit the house.  But if Anna and Mary actually marry that would leave Sarah all alone.

And wow.  That was practically a temper tantrum from Poor Sarah, but she got a lot of positive feedback from the followers.  She's so lucky.  Not.

Sarah won't know whether she is "capable" of living alone unless she tries it.  My guess is that she'd panic and run home after less than a week.

I think she only answered the question because it came from a known quantity and not from a hater like us.  Even within Maxwell-humper circles people must be wondering why she is still serving at home. 

Even if she stays at home, why shouldn't she buy an investment property - she doesn't have to buy a fixer-upper that needs home renovation.  But that doesn't seem to be within her comprehension.  She actually has quite a sweet deal if Steve and Teri aren't charging her for rent, food, and utilities, and she has built in housekeepers and cooks in Anna and Mary.

Quote

 At the moment, my time is jam-packed between working on my newest book (just finished the first draft last week!), my normal Titus2 work plus part-time bookkeeping for three companies, and preparing talks to go on a ministry trip myself in less than two weeks.

Jam-packed indeed.  The latest book, check.  The Titus2 work (the blog and helping Teri with a few emails and Mom's Corner, and filling in for Anna and Mary on the mailing.)  Part-time bookkeeping for 3 companies.  That would be CCI for Nathan, Swift Otter for Joseph, and possibly one other job for a non-family member.  I doubt that John needs bookkeeping services for his irrigation business at the moment.  There is no evidence of past projects or testimonials on his website.

But seriously, folks, the Maxwells really are in a new season of life these days.  It's not just Teri putting up her feet after 35 years of homeschooling, the businesses have been completely restructured.  Steve is now support staff for Swift Otter and Nathan has taken over CCI.  I think Steve is practically retired. 

And all these mystery "ministry trips" are quite unprecedented.  Sarah is preparing talks!  Is she travelling solo?  This inquiring mind wants to know.

[Lgirlrocks]

Sorry Sarah but some people become independent because they are growing up. Yes you can choose to live at home as an adult. 

[Anonymousguest]

I never lived alone, I went from my parents house, to the dorm, to living with roommates (which included my now husband before we were married) to living with my husband. I think that's a fairly normal scenario for a lot of people.  I did things both for fun and to help the living situation run smoothly in all those cases. I wasn't alone but I was independent. I've been married and had children for so long now that I sometimes have trouble with the conceptt of being "independent" because my decisions effect so many other people. But I think it comes down to me being responsible for my own thoughts and growth as a human (and whatever practical actions I need to take to make that growth happen) which is what Sarah is missing. Could she go to a different church? Join a singles/meet up group? Take a writing class? You can do all those things and still enjoy your family. She would probably say she could, but that she doesn't want to. Her parents might even say she could, but what would the emotional consequences if she did something they ultimately didn't approve of?

I have a couple of adult children living at home, and it's a tricky relationship. One in particular has a mental illness that makes independence even harder. It's really hard to know when to step back and say, "this is your decision/situation/etc, you need to figure it out" or just take care of it. On some level it would just be easier to continue treat them like children. But ultimately I want them functioning without me. And honestly I'm looking forward to having an empty nest someday. There will be no tears from me, LMAO. 

[IReallyAmHopewell]

4 hours ago, Koala said:

She's a 36 year old woman, and her parents monitor her cell phone.  Of course she can't own a house!  What a silly idea!   She needs free time to watch her brothers live their lives.

Steve and Terry?  You've robbed her.  Pure and simple, you are stealing her life away.  Shame on you both.

Steve and Terry are thinking only of the money they'll save on their lack of need for a nursing home. Their dutiful drudge, Sarah, will be the "useful spinster" who stays home and changes Mom and Dad's diapers instead of those of children of her own. How unbelievably selfish of them. With how many ever kids and grandkids their care would be assured anyway--let her "grow up" and live her own life. She'll be that much more willing to care for you!!!

1 hour ago, Anonymousguest said:

I never lived alone, I went from my parents house, to the dorm, to living with roommates (which included my now husband before we were married) to living with my husband. I think that's a fairly normal scenario for a lot of people. 

I have a couple of adult children living at home, and it's a tricky relationship. One in particular has a mental illness that makes independence even harder. It's really hard to know when to step back and say, "this is your decision/situation/etc, you need to figure it out" or just take care of it. On some level it would just be easier to continue treat them like children. But ultimately I want them functioning without me. And honestly I'm looking forward to having an empty nest someday. There will be no tears from me, LMAO. 

6

"I never lived along" No, but you LEFT HOME!! And you had a choice TO live alone if you wanted. [I know you know this]

On grown up kids: I'm with you on this. We need our own sisterhood. But we were not supposed to create dependency in giving birth, but to foster independence in our kids. The Maxwells go beyond "mere" helicopter parents--those kids can still make a run for it. Living in Prison Camp Maxwell is to be a toddler all your days. So sad.

[nastyhobbitses]

I think the Maxwells seem to have a very all-or-nothing mindset when it comes to family dynamics/closeness. Either you're totally enmeshed to the point where moving a block away but planning to come to every single family event no matter how insignificant sends the entire family into wailing hysterics, or you're cutting everyone off forever because you're "independent". 

I live 3,000 miles away from my family. I do miss them and I'm happy when I get chances to see them, but my saying "I'm probably going to travel this Christmas since we've done two huge family Christmases in a row" to my mom doesn't translate to "I HATE YOU FOREVER AND I WILL NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN"; it translates to "I love you and I am grateful that you loved me enough to give me the skills and drive I need to live my own life, and the curiosity to love seeing the world". 

Side note unrelated: Chris's wedding photography site is a guilty pleasure of mine, and I see text when I mouse over the photos that link to the individual wedding shoots he did, but then I can't read the whole blurb! I need context for his weird-ass photos!