Bro Gary Hawkins 18: Bro In My State...State of the Bro

[Antipatriarch]

17 hours ago, thoughtful said:

"Ya go over to Isaiah chapter uh, ah don't know 'xac'ly where the chapter is raht off hand, but it - the chap - it starts off pretty early in the chapters an' it said 'Ah ah ah ah  Lord there's not a whole lot to me  . . but ah'll go.'

Wow, that's some great Bible teaching right there. Good to know, as Gary extols the virtue of hard work, that he's so invested in his chosen craft.

I wonder how much support Paul would have had to live on, if he'd made tents like Gary preaches sermons.

[thoughtful]

22 minutes ago, Antipatriarch said:

I wonder how much support Paul would have had to live on, if he'd made tents like Gary preaches sermons.

I think a tent made by those standards, if it could talk, would say "Be ye holey, for I am holey."

Thank you - I'll be here all week. Be sure to tip your waiter.

[Alisamer]

16 hours ago, Xan said:

So Gary thinks he's the only thing standing between a person's soul and Hell?  I actually sat with this thought for a moment.  Let's just say Gary's right.  He has the key to salvation.  And, after he dies, he'll go to Heaven and he'll be joined by David and Jill Rodrigues, Lori Alexander, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar, and the rest of the fundies.  You know what?  I choose Hell.  If I thought I'd have to spend an eternity with all that hate and judgment and general stupidity, I'd gladly throw myself into the lake of fire.  

I'm pausing to think about it again.  Are you sure, Xan?  Yep.  None of those fundies seem at all loving and caring.  Lake of fire, it is.

A lot of these fundies make heaven sound a lot like hell. Anywhere Lori Alexander is becomes hell, IMO.

I'm still hoping that heaven is individually tailored for each person to enjoy, and the fundies get their own little less-pleasant part of it all to themselves, since they think they'll be the only ones up there.

What sort of loving creator God gives you a choice between suffering on earth and suffering for eternity? He's omniscient and created everything, right? Put the good people in a good place and the bad people in a bad place. Or just don't make bad people in the first place then none of his children have to suffer. 

[thoughtful]

It's two days since the last service, and two days until the next one, so Gary has to use Facebook to make sure the world hears his wonderful ideas.

When I read this, a heavenly diaper table, with baby jesus on it, came to mind:

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Guess what everybody answered:

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ETA - well, except for this guy, who seems to have gone to the same spelling and grammar school as Gary, and who is offended at the question being asked at all!

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Edited July 23, 2021 by thoughtful

[thoughtful]

Busybody Gary must be worried that Jerry doesn't know there is only one sin that will send you to Hell:

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[Antipatriarch]

Quote

Ok folks a good question.

Has GOD ever forsaken you?

Bro Gary Hawkins

"But Lord, why at the hardest parts of my life are there only one set of footprints?"

And he replied:

"My child, it was then that I ditched you. Do you even realize how whiny you get? Myself! Cowboy up FFS!"

[MayMay1123]

Ham desires... mmmm ?

[AmazonGrace]

Quote

"Ya go over to Isaiah chapter uh, ah don't know 'xac'ly where the chapter is raht off hand, but it - the chap - it starts off pretty early in the chapters an' it said 'Ah ah ah ah  Lord there's not a whole lot to me  . . but ah'll go.'

If Paul wrote letters like Gary they'd never get delivered.

"Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God, to the saints who are in Eph, Epho, well ah don't know 'xactly where raht off hand..."

 

 

[Ozlsn]

1 hour ago, thoughtful said:

Busybody Gary must be worried that Jerry doesn't know there is only one sin that will send you to Hell:

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Now I am curious as to which sins Gary has not repented of. 

Of course it's likely Gary just doing his pedantic thing that "sin" covers everything you've ever done so why the plural - possibly for the same reason it's "forgive us our trespasses"?

Also I'm with Ron, it's a pretty bad question when you about it. "Have you ever felt like God has forsaken you" would be better and fit the theology.

I'm also starting to wonder if Gary has long covid or early onset dementia or similar - it feels like his lapses are getting worse, and his processing is more confused. Of course another explanation could be that he's caring less, or on the conspiracy side, that Becky's drugging him.

 

[thoughtful]

1 hour ago, MayMay1123 said:

Ham desires... mmmm ?

But the ham wishes are unfulfilled, since they ATE NOT!

[thoughtful]

40 minutes ago, Ozlsn said:

Now I am curious as to which sins Gary has not repented of. 

Of course it's likely Gary just doing his pedantic thing that "sin" covers everything you've ever done so why the plural - possibly for the same reason it's "forgive us our trespasses"?

I have no doubt it is Gary making sure that Jerry knows that the only sin that can send you to Hell is not accepting and receiving the gift of the death burial and resurrection of Jesus on that old rugged cross.

He often rants about how only that sin sends you to Hell. Other sins just get you some other punishment. Gary wanted to make sure Jerry wasn't preaching false doctrine by implying that other sins can land you in Hell.

And Ron Godwin's rant is gone now. Gary, you dishonest creep.

I looked at Godwin's page - he's a Calvinist and just as right wing and off-the-rails as Gary. A word-salad fight between them might have been fun.

Oh, well.

[thoughtful]

Andrew, you need to proof-read:

ETA - he noticed:

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However, we don't need to know your blood type, Andrew.

Edited July 23, 2021 by thoughtful

[Bastet]

7 hours ago, Alisamer said:

A lot of these fundies make heaven sound a lot like hell.

“Heaven for the climate, hell for the company.” (Not sure who I should attribute this to.)

[Black Aliss]

4 hours ago, Antipatriarch said:

"But Lord, why at the hardest parts of my life are there only one set of footprints?"

And he replied:

"My child, it was then that I ditched you. Do you even realize how whiny you get? Myself! Cowboy up FFS!"

I'd give an attribution but I don't know the author. There are a couple of variants in circulation.

Quote

One night I had a wondrous dream,

One set of footprints there was seen,

The footprints of the Goddess they were,

But mine were not along the shore.

But then some stranger prints appeared,

and I asked Her, "What have we here?

These prints are large and round and neat,

But much too big to be from feet."

"My child," She said in somber tones,

"For miles I carried you alone.

I challenged you to walk in faith,

But you refused and made me wait."

"You would not learn, you would not grow,

The walk of faith, you would not know,

So I got tired, I got fed up,

And there I dropped you on your butt.

"Because in life, there comes a time

When one must fight, and one must climb,

When one must rise and take a stand,

Or leave their butt prints in the sand."

 

[thoughtful]

Bored, Gary?

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[AmazonGrace]

Are you a hirling? 

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Ok folks I am hear a man in the White House saying something about another shut  down and mandates.  If you are a Pastor and you shut your Church  down you're not a Pastor you are a hirling. I know that the virus is real and folks have die from it.  They have died from other virus and the the world still went on. Folks this is more about what the the democrats want. You can bow down to the government like so many has. GOD Said Obey me when it comes to the Church. Now I have to say this because I have lots of critics. This is my page and I will put what I believe need to be said.  Just remember every person will stand before GOD face to Face. And your excuses won't work there. 
Bro Gary Hawkins

 

[thoughtful]

Hmmmm . . . "hirling" . . .

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Nah.

A salmon trout?

https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/hirling

We know he says "puking" and "vomicking" for that kind of hurling.

So I'm guessing he meant "hireling," which is used in the KJV pretty often:

https://www.biblegateway.com/quicksearch/?quicksearch=hireling&version=KJV

So, anyone who closes their church is an employee of Biden?

Of course, this is Gary, so what word he thought he was using is anybody's guess.

[thoughtful]

Evangelist Craig Moss (not to be confused with any other Craig Moss!) has commented under Gary's "I am hear a man in the White House" post:

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You don't sound archaic, Craig - you sound pigheaded and conspiracy-addled.

[Xan]

3 hours ago, thoughtful said:

Evangelist Craig Moss (not to be confused with any other Craig Moss!) has commented under Gary's "I am hear a man in the White House" post:

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You don't sound archaic, Craig - you sound pigheaded and conspiracy-addled.

I wonder if Craig reads anything besides Newsmax or listens to anything but OAN?  That fake statistic about the number of "real" Covid deaths sounds like stuff I've heard from other nutters who never stray from the rightwing areas.

I'm a little curious about Becky.  She hasn't posted in almost a month.  Usually, she'll add a photo when they've gone to the beach.  We know she's still around and looks okay because she's in Gary's preaching videos.  

[Black Aliss]

I am not a salmon trout, which may be why I haven't heard anyone from the White House talking about shutdowns and mask mandates. I also don't need anyone telling me to wear a mask. My only change in behavior since the mandate ended in our state is to start wearing an N95 whenever I have to be indoors, rather than one of my fashionable cloth masks that I prefer. 

My state was down to fewer than 300 cases per day less than 2 weeks ago. Now it's closer to 900/day. I am beyond furious with these idiots and I am completely out of compassion for them.

[thoughtful]

Joshua is referring to the verse about forsaking not the assembling of themselves together. Because, of course, one quote from Paul, that was directed at a particular community, cancels all of that caring for one another that Jesus suggested.

Mary, you seem like a person with a fine brain. Don't waste it trying to convince Gary of anything. Any guesses as to whether Gary will fight with her, delete the comment, or never notice it because he's so busy preparing a fresh, new, never-before-preached message for tomorrow?

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[thoughtful]

And, we have our answer:

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Mary, you thanked him too soon - Gary always get belligerent, sooner or later.

Also, Gary doesn't seem to understand how vaccines work. Big surprise.

[Joyster]

40 minutes ago, thoughtful said:

And, we have our answer:

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Mary, you thanked him too soon - Gary always get belligerent, sooner or later.

Also, Gary doesn't seem to understand how vaccines work. Big surprise.

I looked at Mary Bair's Facebook page.  I really like her, and I predict we won't be seeing her in the future.  She's way too rational for Gary. She loves dogs and wants all political sides to be accountable to higher standards.  She hates racism and Trump.  She is a Christian who had multicolored hair at one point and lives in Texas although her heart is in Tuscon. She has posts that made me laugh and posts that make me think.

She could be one of you, but we'll never know because it's against the rules. It was so refreshing to click on one of his commentator's pages and not cringe.

[thoughtful]

She's still trying. I imagine she will get another nasty answer from Gary.

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ETA - Gary answered. He ain't for sell.

Edited July 25, 2021 by thoughtful

[thoughtful]

Mary gave it the old college try, one more time (but Mary, Gary don't like college - he ain't got no high-dollar education):

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Gary found a gig for tonight, so he doesn't have to go to Daddy's church and miss out on a love offering:

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And there's another fight going on this morning. Will you been in a KJV church?
 

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ETA more. Gary, you are going to make yourself late for church.

Edited July 25, 2021 by thoughtful