Alyssa and John 8: Four Daughters, a New House, and a Pool

[OHFL2009]

John and Alyssa officially purchased the house last Wednesday, so they did most of the renovations before they owned it. But I guess when you have an existing relationship with the seller that's not as risky as it seems. They also financed with a mortgage from the seller, so they didn't have to worry about an appraisal or anything before closing. It seems like a fair number of the 2nd gen kids don't subscribe to the no debt philosophy.

[SassyPants]

23 minutes ago, OHFL2009 said:

John and Alyssa officially purchased the house last Wednesday, so they did most of the renovations before they owned it. But I guess when you have an existing relationship with the seller that's not as risky as it seems. They also financed with a mortgage from the seller, so they didn't have to worry about an appraisal or anything before closing. It seems like a fair number of the 2nd gen kids don't subscribe to the no debt philosophy.

I don’t think G and KJ vocally talked about living debt free. That’s more of a Maxwell, Duggar tenet. Was that a B Gothard thing? Dollars to donuts G and KG were in debt at times. Living debt free without any education, skills or work history (looking at you G-2 Duggars) is pie-in-the- sky thinking.

[FrumpyAtheist]

So much processed food in that pantry. I guess some habits from her childhood die hard.

[OHFL2009]

7 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

I don’t think G and KJ vocally talked about living debt free. That’s more of a Maxwell, Duggar tenet. Was that a B Gothard thing? Dollars to donuts G and KG were in debt at times. Living debt free without any education, skills or work history (looking at you G-2 Duggars) is pie-in-the- sky thinking.

I'm not sure where the debt-free thing started, but this article from 2011 talks about Gil and KJ having no debt (except to Lawson, because having to borrow money from your 19-year-old son makes you look like great parents). But they aren't always known for being entirely honest, so it wouldn't surprise me if they had debt and rationalized it as not really debt. I could also see them being more ok with a mortgage held by an individual they know well vs. a bank mortgage.  

[Johannah]

3 hours ago, FrumpyAtheist said:

So much processed food in that pantry. I guess some habits from her childhood die hard.

I was thinking the same thing. I’m far from a paragon of nutritional standards. I had a rough day and just gave my kids happy meals for dinner, but we try to make that a very occasional occurrence.

Some of the things in Alyssa’s pantry seem inexcusable. Or maybe she just doesn’t know better? Kool-aid????? Why not at least 100% juice boxes? Or give them each a refillable water bottle. Also, individually packaged oatmeal is not only heavily processed and filled with added sugar, but rolled oats are just as fast to make in the microwave, and you can quickly and easily add your own milk or fruit or sugar. It’s not only healthier, but also significantly cheaper and tastes infinitely better.
 

Again, she just might not know better. My parents also fed me a bunch of processed shit in the 80s, and they’re well-educated; I think they were just super busy and didn’t care. They kind of had the mindset that “kid food” was supposed to be crap. Plus there was a lot less emphasis on nutritional food standards 35 years ago. Not sure what Alyssa’s excuse is. 

[SassyPants]

55 minutes ago, Johannah said:

I was thinking the same thing. I’m far from a paragon of nutritional standards. I had a rough day and just gave my kids happy meals for dinner, but we try to make that a very occasional occurrence.

Some of the things in Alyssa’s pantry seem inexcusable. Or maybe she just doesn’t know better? Kool-aid????? Why not at least 100% juice boxes? Or give them each a refillable water bottle. Also, individually packaged oatmeal is not only heavily processed and filled with added sugar, but rolled oats are just as fast to make in the microwave, and you can quickly and easily add your own milk or fruit or sugar. It’s not only healthier, but also significantly cheaper and tastes infinitely better.
 

Again, she just might not know better. My parents also fed me a bunch of processed shit in the 80s, and they’re well-educated; I think they were just super busy and didn’t care. They kind of had the mindset that “kid food” was supposed to be crap. Plus there was a lot less emphasis on nutritional food standards 35 years ago. Not sure what Alyssa’s excuse is. 

Maybe she is living vicariously through her kids? Maybe she lusted for sugary, prepackaged junk in her youth, yet I’m sure those items would have been cost prohibitive for a family with 19 kids. She also likely lacks basic nutrition knowledge.

[UnicornHunter]

I was surprised there’s not a lot of adult food in there.  Maybe it’s because they just moved in but 75% of that pantry is drinks and kid food.

I could also see John getting a lot of fast food on his way home from work since Alyssa can’t cook for shit. I could also see her drinking a ton throughout to the day to help her eat less to stay so thin.

[freethemall]

5 hours ago, FrumpyAtheist said:

So much processed food in that pantry. I guess some habits from her childhood die hard.

We've seen Alyssa is majorly addicted to processed junk food and is carrying that on to her kids because she doesn't seem interested in healthy meals and cooking,  even compared to some of her sisters like Erin. They constantly eat Chik Fil A, her dream baby making vacation was laying on a couch of junk food snacks,  and she seems to rely on boxed mac and cheese for kid lunches and dinners with sugary pastries for breakfast.  Just based on what we've seen from her social media. 

One thing I was perturbed by in the video was that she plans to get a desk to start Zoey on online school in the summer. It's already age inappropriate to strap her older preschoolers to a desk for hours for such passive learning,  but Zoey is even more so. Dont bother with homeschooling if your main priority is how cute the school room looks rather than keeping the kids engaged,  exploring,  and learning through active play. 

[UnicornHunter]

38 minutes ago, freethemall said:

We've seen Alyssa is majorly addicted to processed junk food and is carrying that on to her kids because she doesn't seem interested in healthy meals and cooking,  even compared to some of her sisters like Erin. They constantly eat Chik Fil A, her dream baby making vacation was laying on a couch of junk food snacks,  and she seems to rely on boxed mac and cheese for kid lunches and dinners with sugary pastries for breakfast.  Just based on what we've seen from her social media. 

One thing I was perturbed by in the video was that she plans to get a desk to start Zoey on online school in the summer. It's already age inappropriate to strap her older preschoolers to a desk for hours for such passive learning,  but Zoey is even more so. Dont bother with homeschooling if your main priority is how cute the school room looks rather than keeping the kids engaged,  exploring,  and learning through active play. 

I was bored and on YouTube and came across her video on homeschooling. She said she starts her kids at 1.5. Just like her older ones “homeschool” means sorting them in front of a portable DVD player. It’s so sad because a few videos later in a q&a someone asked why they homeschool and they said because every kid learns differently and they can tailor education to their kids needs. Sitting them all in front of DVDs for 2-3 hours a day is not at all tailoring to their needs. They’d get more teacher interaction in public school.

[Jackie3]

2 hours ago, freethemall said:

One thing I was perturbed by in the video was that she plans to get a desk to start Zoey on online school in the summer. It's already age inappropriate to strap her older preschoolers to a desk for hours for such passive learning,  but Zoey is even more so. Dont bother with homeschooling if your main priority is how cute the school room looks rather than keeping the kids engaged,  exploring,  and learning through active play. 

Come on! It is super hard for Alyssa to put on her makeup in the morning with a two year old wandering around. Of course she is in a rush to start "school" with Zoey--"school" means the kid is busy watching videos in the "schoolroom." I noticed she says that the schoolroom was the first room she set up. Of course it was.

From what I can tell, she isn't doing any "tailoring" of their education to fit their needs. Nor is she encouraging active, hands on learning. Fingerpainting and paper mache would mess up that pretty schoolroom, not to mention the kids' outfits. Videos of other kids fingerpainting is much neater! 

[Melissa1977]

I said it before, but before her wedding, Alyssa was very interested in healthy food and had a full pinterest board with healthy easy recipes. Baby Allie was feed with veggies. It was later when she became addict to junk food, or too lazy to cook or whatever. 

[Jackie3]

22 minutes ago, Melissa1977 said:

I said it before, but before her wedding, Alyssa was very interested in healthy food and had a full pinterest board with healthy easy recipes. Baby Allie was feed with veggies. It was later when she became addict to junk food, or too lazy to cook or whatever. 

There are lots of things on a pintrest board that people never do. You'd think my house was gorgeous, judging from my pintrest board.

[GreenBeans]

10 hours ago, OHFL2009 said:

John and Alyssa officially purchased the house last Wednesday, so they did most of the renovations before they owned it. But I guess when you have an existing relationship with the seller that's not as risky as it seems. They also financed with a mortgage from the seller, so they didn't have to worry about an appraisal or anything before closing. It seems like a fair number of the 2nd gen kids don't subscribe to the no debt philosophy.

What does “mortgage from the seller” mean? That they are basically paying the seller in installments over 10, 20 years, like they would pay off a loan from the bank? How does that work and why would a seller agree to this?

This is completely unheard of where I’m from. The seller will want the purchase price immediately, so as a buyer, unless you have the entire purchase price in cash, you have to find a bank to grant you a loan.

[Melissa1977]

1 hour ago, Jackie3 said:

There are lots of things on a pintrest board that people never do. You'd think my house was gorgeous, judging from my pintrest board.

Sure, but people say Alyssa eats junk food because she doesn't know better. It's not true, not only she knows, but also she feed healthy her first baby. 

[OHFL2009]

4 hours ago, GreenBeans said:

What does “mortgage from the seller” mean? That they are basically paying the seller in installments over 10, 20 years, like they would pay off a loan from the bank? How does that work and why would a seller agree to this?

This is completely unheard of where I’m from. The seller will want the purchase price immediately, so as a buyer, unless you have the entire purchase price in cash, you have to find a bank to grant you a loan.

Yes, the seller of the property is the mortgagee, and they will pay him monthly (based on the monthly payment/interest rate, it looks like a 30 year loan); it's called a purchase-money mortgage. They are pretty rare, but not unheard of. The article I linked says it's usually done when the buyer can't get traditional financing, but based on the purchase price, the fact that they made a 20% down payment, and their estimated income based on John's job, I think they would've easily qualified for a traditional mortgage. 

I'm guessing they went this route because the seller is their previous landlord and I'm pretty sure he's also a relative, so maybe they were more comfortable "keeping it in the family" than dealing with outside lenders. Given that the seller has owned the house for more than 10 years but doesn't live in it, I'm guessing it's been a rental property, so not much is changing in the month-to-month structure of their relationship. He'll probably find new renters to rent their old house, so he'll still be getting paid for both houses monthly, and John and Alyssa will continue to pay him monthly. But now this house is off his books, and John and Alyssa are responsible for taxes/insurance, and they are building equity. It's definitely an unusual situation but I'm not surprised by it.

[UnicornHunter]

5 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

Sure, but people say Alyssa eats junk food because she doesn't know better. It's not true, not only she knows, but also she feed healthy her first baby. 

I agree. I see the “she doesn’t know any better” argument a lot. Yes, she was failed in terms of her home education but that can’t be an excuse forever.

in their homeschool YouTube video the kids get a “school snack” when they are done. A basket full of cookies, processed snacks and juice. It doesn’t take a college education to know an apple and cheese stick are better than a bag of cookies with juice. 

[Johannah]

I wish Alyssa would at least hire a tutor to “tailor” learning to the girls’ needs, but I guess that would out her as the mom who isn’t actually homeschooling. Plus, cost. Those poor kids. I’d rather go to the school of the dining room table where there is at least human interaction rather than sit in a dark room alone on a computer all day. 

[Melissa1977]

6 minutes ago, Johannah said:

Those poor kids. I’d rather go to the school of the dining room table where there is at least human interaction rather than sit in a dark room alone on a computer all day

Exactly! Plus I doubt children are actually learning. Erin said she watched the videos with Carson because screen alone was not enough to learn. While I doubt she does it in a daily basis (and definitely she won't have the time to watch 4 videos when 4 children will be schooled), at least she realises a screen teacher is not enough for young students.

[Jackie3]

6 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

Sure, but people say Alyssa eats junk food because she doesn't know better. It's not true, not only she knows, but also she feed healthy her first baby. 

We really have no idea what she fed Allie. You can't make a determination based on a video of her feeding Allie for the camera, or a pintrest board, for that matter.

I'm sure she knew that vegetables and fruits are good for a baby, everyone with a minimal education knows this.

27 minutes ago, Melissa1977 said:

Exactly! Plus I doubt children are actually learning. Erin said she watched the videos with Carson because screen alone was not enough to learn. While I doubt she does it in a daily basis (and definitely she won't have the time to watch 4 videos when 4 children will be schooled), at least she realises a screen teacher is not enough for young students.

I imagine that small children watch for a while, if it's moderately entertaining. Then they wiggle around in their chair, climb down, go see what their sister is doing, distract their sister, get their sister mad, mess with the school supplies, take a sip of the iced coffee Alyssa accidentally left there, wander off to get a toy from the next room. . . 

36 minutes ago, Johannah said:

I wish Alyssa would at least hire a tutor to “tailor” learning to the girls’ needs, but I guess that would out her as the mom who isn’t actually homeschooling. Plus, cost. Those poor kids. I’d rather go to the school of the dining room table where there is at least human interaction rather than sit in a dark room alone on a computer all day. 

The odd thing is, those Abeka videos aren't cheap! With the same money, you could buy a huge amount of paint, paper, scissors, playdoh, construction paper and markers. Those kids could have a good old time!

1 hour ago, OHFL2009 said:

How does that work and why would a seller agree to this?

It's an investment. They get paid interest. The same reason a bank issues a mortgage. They want to make money and have a steady source of income (the monthly mortgage payment).

Edited March 24, 2021 by Jackie3

[rebeccawriter01]

8 hours ago, GreenBeans said:

What does “mortgage from the seller” mean? That they are basically paying the seller in installments over 10, 20 years, like they would pay off a loan from the bank? How does that work and why would a seller agree to this?

This is completely unheard of where I’m from. The seller will want the purchase price immediately, so as a buyer, unless you have the entire purchase price in cash, you have to find a bank to grant you a loan.

Sometimes a seller has priced a house or property higher than the bank will finance it for overall. The seller might be willing to finance it himself or herself at that point so they get the asking price plus interest. Typically, the interest is much higher than a traditional loan.   

[Lgirlrocks]

3 hours ago, Jackie3 said:

 

I imagine that small children watch for a while, if it's moderately entertaining. Then they wiggle around in their chair, climb down, go see what their sister is doing, distract their sister, get their sister mad, mess with the school supplies, take a sip of the iced coffee Alyssa accidentally left there, wander off to get a toy from the next room. . . 

I hope she doesn’t punish them for wondering off. 

[Jackie3]

1 hour ago, Lgirlrocks said:

I hope she doesn’t punish them for wondering off. 

I also hope she doesn't expect blind, rigid obedience. But she was raised that way herself.

[postscript]

11 hours ago, GreenBeans said:

What does “mortgage from the seller” mean? That they are basically paying the seller in installments over 10, 20 years, like they would pay off a loan from the bank? How does that work and why would a seller agree to this?

This is completely unheard of where I’m from. The seller will want the purchase price immediately, so as a buyer, unless you have the entire purchase price in cash, you have to find a bank to grant you a loan.

I was going to answer this (I write mortgages for a living), but others have already done so. If they’re trying to live debt-free, they may not have sufficient credit history to obtain a bank loan. They’re probably paying a higher interest rate with a private mortgage, with the understanding that with a year or two of good payment history, they may be able to qualify for standard financing. The seller is also far less likely to foreclose if they don’t make their payments. 

in addition, they can deduct the interest and real estate taxes on their income tax returns, and they’re building equity in the property.

Another thought - Florida has an insanely high recording tax, calculated on the amount of the mortgage. They may be doing some sort of workaround to avoid paying the full amount of tax. 
 

 

[Bazinga]

I'm wondering why we are making excuses for Alyssa period? This is 2021, a quick google search on nutrition will show you the basic building blocks of eating. I don't think we should judge anyone on their eating habits. She wants to eat processed foods, then that is what she is going to do. Sure, I can WISH she fed her kids real,  home cooked meals, but my wishes don't matter here. Her kids are fed, the end. Not every child out there has that luxury. But to say Alyssa doesn't know better seems a bit of a stretch. I see Whitney, Erin, and Josie talk about eating more healthy (and even sharing recipes in their stories). Just like me and my girlfriends, I'm sure Alyssa has gabbed about food and weight loss with her sisters and SIL. During those discussions, it's quite likely nutrition is discussed. I mean come on. She is making a conscious choice to feed her children like that. Maybe it's because she never had it as a kid and wants her children to experience it too, but again, she is making the choice (and can I be allowed to be a wee bit jealous that she eats so much crap, but looks that thin!!!).

I have said it before, but I'll say it again, I think Alyssa is the type of person who would thrive being in a working environment. I think she likes the idea of being a stay at home mom, but she comes off as awfully self serving and immature. Her children pay the price by getting TV for "school", crazy early bedtimes, forced naps, and easy meals. Most likely so Alyssa can do what Alyssa wants to do. I think if Alyssa had a job, where she can feel important and spend some time with just herself for 8 hours a day, she might come home to her children a completely different person. Some people are just like that. They need the mental break from small humans, to feel like an adult. Then come home and give the best version of themselves to their kids. Anyways, I'm rambling now and honestly this is all randomness in my brain. I could be extremely off base here.

[Jackie3]

I'm actually glad she isn't homeschooling them herself. Her latest insta story informs us that it's never to late" to do something great. Is this a typo, or does she really not know the different between to, too and two?