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Alyssa and John 8: Four Daughters, a New House, and a Pool


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Melissa1977
3 hours ago, UnicornHunter said:

It’s almost like she’s talking directly to Alyssa

Absolutely! But I doubt Alyssa will realise it. 

 

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I grew up with some pretty horrific beliefs. One thing that helped me change is that people did react in horror when I said really awful stuff. If people in my life had just quietly tolerated my hatef

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Honestly, I’m a little sad that “school of the dinning room table” didn’t somehow work its way into this thread title...

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QuiverFullofBooks

It’s great that Erin wants dancing to be one of her kids’ best memories.

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OyToTheVey

Erin often shows her kids playing in puddles and feeding the pig. They play with their goats and dance around. Looks like a nice childhood.

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SassyPants

I’ll admit, that Maci is darling. She’s more Webster than Bates.

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HereticHick
2 hours ago, OyToTheVey said:

Erin often shows her kids playing in puddles and feeding the pig. They play with their goats and dance around. Looks like a nice childhood.

Alyssa probably doesn't allow her girls to play in puddles or feed pigs, lest they ruin their flammable-tulle-dollar-story-faerie ensembles sent by Tiki the Stalker

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Mom to Nell
20 hours ago, UnicornHunter said:

It’s almost like she’s talking directly to Alyssa.

I thought the same and then wondered if she read the conversation here on FJ about the 6:00 p.m. bedtime. One of the 1st specific activities Erin listed was "staying up late reading books together in bed".

Love it, both for the ding and the reading with her children.

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AussieKrissy
3 hours ago, Mom to Nell said:

I thought the same and then wondered if she read the conversation here on FJ about the 6:00 p.m. bedtime. One of the 1st specific activities Erin listed was "staying up late reading books together in bed".

Love it, both for the ding and the reading with her children.

bet it is only the bible though... better than nothing i suppose

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Melissa1977
13 hours ago, HereticHick said:

Alyssa probably doesn't allow her girls to play in puddles or feed pigs, lest they ruin their flammable-tulle-dollar-story-faerie ensembles sent by Tiki the Stalker

Alyssa doesn't let them get dirty, but to be fair, they don't wear those tutus in a daily basis. In IG stories, they are often dressed in T-shirts or blouses with leggings or shorts. 

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CanadianMamam

There was also a big difference in Alyssa’s post for Zoey’s birthday and Erin’s for Everly’s. Alyssa posted one picture, of all 3 girls all dressed up from their photo shoot (though only Zoey is in focus) and Erin posted several photos of Everly with a variety of animals (and hugging her brother). 

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OyToTheVey
10 hours ago, AussieKrissy said:

bet it is only the bible though... better than nothing i suppose

I wish I could say this without looking like a leg humper lol but there's been multiple pictures of Chad reading children's board books. Yes the bible is involved but they read animal, car, etc books to them too.

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Melissa1977
1 hour ago, OyToTheVey said:

I wish I could say this without looking like a leg humper lol but there's been multiple pictures of Chad reading children's board books. Yes the bible is involved but they read animal, car, etc books to them too.

There is plenty of nice Christian storybooks. But if those children really like reading, there will be a moment most books will be banned. They will never be free to go to a library or a bookstore by themselves. Censorship is part of their upbringing.

Erin is showing a country uthopia. Green grass, animals and happy children running wild. It's great. But those children cannot socialize in a daily basis (just with several cousins) and have a very limited education despite Erin's efforts. If Carson wants to be a builder or a farmer or a pilot, ok, but what if he wants to join a secular college? And are the girls allowed dream about being a professional adult someday? 

 

 

2 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

There was also a big difference in Alyssa’s post for Zoey’s birthday and Erin’s for Everly’s. Alyssa posted one picture, of all 3 girls all dressed up from their photo shoot (though only Zoey is in focus) and Erin posted several photos of Everly with a variety of animals (and hugging her brother). 

Erin is clearly making an effort lately. I suppose she realises she has to focus in her actual children, instead of in future blessings that are not coming. But for a long time, Everly has been basically a lost girl. Carson was Erin's favourite, Brooklyn the naughty funny one, and then baby Holland. If Erin is noticing Everly now, good for her. But at least Alyssa doesn't play favourites.

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Jackie3
37 minutes ago, Melissa1977 said:

 But at least Alyssa doesn't play favourites.

How do we know this? From the photoshoots she posts? I mean, that is quite a leap. You can only infer so much from a photo of three little girls posed in a field, or lined up in front of the garage.

As for Erin, she's always seemed to like Everly just fine. 

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SassyPants

Just an observation based on my husband’s family that had 7 kids in 10 years time, and the first 5 in 4 years. Ages now range from late 60s to late 50s. My husband is #5, so the youngest one in the four year span (4 boys, 1 girl). Boys 3 and 4 were very, very, very high spirited. #3 so much so that he got shipped to boarding school, but was eventually kicked out. My husband said he learned to just keep quiet and keep his head down. He didn’t want his parents to know he was even there. One time my FIL told me that “ we didn’t even know that C. Was here most of the time.” When you have too many kids close together, the squeaky wheel gets the grease and the rest are just assumed to be doing fine. Constantly putting out fires is such a horrible way to raise a family and live life, IMO.

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Melissa1977
26 minutes ago, Jackie3 said:

How do we know this? From the photoshoots she posts? I mean, that is quite a leap. You can only infer so much from a photo of three little girls posed in a field, or lined up in front of the garage.

As for Erin, she's always seemed to like Everly just fine. 

Erin used to say Carson was her best friend. Her posts about him were very different from the posts about Brook (she wasn't as "perfect" as Carson), but at least she said things about Brook, while we knew anything about Everly. Conversely, Alyssa writes similar posts for all the girls.

Not saying one is better mom than the other. But based on their social networks, I have the feeling that Erin plays favourites. Is IG an evidence? Not, but this is a snark forum. If we cannot base our opinion in what they post, we wouldn't have opinion at all.

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rebeccawriter01
8 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

Erin used to say Carson was her best friend. Her posts about him were very different from the posts about Brook (she wasn't as "perfect" as Carson), but at least she said things about Brook, while we knew anything about Everly. Conversely, Alyssa writes similar posts for all the girls.

Not saying one is better mom than the other. But based on their social networks, I have the feeling that Erin plays favourites. Is IG an evidence? Not, but this is a snark forum. If we cannot base our opinion in what they post, we wouldn't have opinion at all.

I will say I had a flashback of Sex and the City when Erin took Carson to Tori's beach vacay bachelorette deal. She kept saying she couldn't be without him and that he was her best friend. Meanwhile Brooklyn who was at least a year old at the time was left at home. In season one of Sex and the City the girls head to a baby shower and are shocked by some of the moms who are coddling their sons and are inseparable from them, including one who says her son is a god and she tells him so every day. 

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UnicornHunter

I absolutely think Alyssa favors her eldest. From their YouTube videos the middle child (or was middle before newest baby) is a bit spirited and doesn’t fall in line like the eldest. She needs to heavily praise her sister mom so she keeps up the performance.

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Melissa1977
2 hours ago, UnicornHunter said:

I absolutely think Alyssa favors her eldest. From their YouTube videos the middle child (or was middle before newest baby) is a bit spirited and doesn’t fall in line like the eldest. She needs to heavily praise her sister mom so she keeps up the performance.

She trains Allie to be a sistermom. Allie is probably going to get the hardest trainings and a lot of responsibility (if Maci is the last one, Lexi and Zoey won't be sistermoms). Yes, Alyssa praises Allie for her "job", the same way Kelly praised Michaela, but it doesn't mean she's her favourite. Favourite (for me) means a kid that is liked more than the others and treated better for no reason. 

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Melissa1977
5 hours ago, rebeccawriter01 said:

I will say I had a flashback of Sex and the City when Erin took Carson to Tori's beach vacay bachelorette deal. She kept saying she couldn't be without him and that he was her best friend. Meanwhile Brooklyn who was at least a year old at the time was left at home. In season one of Sex and the City the girls head to a baby shower and are shocked by some of the moms who are coddling their sons and are inseparable from them, including one who says her son is a god and she tells him so every day. 

It was absurd. Who leaves a baby at home, while travels with a toddler, because he's her best friend and can't be without him? A 2 year old is your best friend? Sorry? Erin sounded very unhealthy those times. Lately she's not saying that kind of things, I wonder if she realised how weird she sounded.

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HermioneSparrow
On 4/1/2021 at 12:22 AM, UnicornHunter said:

I absolutely think Alyssa favors her eldest. From their YouTube videos the middle child (or was middle before newest baby) is a bit spirited and doesn’t fall in line like the eldest. She needs to heavily praise her sister mom so she keeps up the performance.

Alyssa is always saying sweet things about Zoey, I think if anyone is a "favourite" is Zoey, she seems to like how funny and sweet and how much of a "mommy's girl" she is. That being said, she doesn't really lean on her posts towards any daughter.

Erin on the other hand, has shown favouritism towards Carson all the time and I bet if she doesn't have any more children, it'll be worst since Carson is her only son.***

 

***this is obviously just speculation.

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Jackie3
28 minutes ago, HermioneSparrow said:

Alyssa is always saying sweet things about Zoey, I think if anyone is a "favourite" is Zoey, she seems to like how funny and sweet and how much of a "mommy's girl" she is. That being said, she doesn't really lean on her posts towards any daughter.

Erin on the other hand, has shown favouritism towards Carson all the time and I bet if she doesn't have any more children, it'll be worst since Carson is her only son.***

 

***this is obviously just speculation.

Yes, if there is a favorite, I think it's Zoey, too.

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just_ordinary

Alyssa very well may have a favourite but she hasn’t publicly shown such a big difference in how she talks about her children. I mean, I get it. If you finally, after several miscarriages, have your long wished for baby and an easy one at that - that is heaven. Brocklyn was very spirited from the beginning. How much of a handful your child is definitely also depends on your personality and past experience. A very easy and quiet child will make even an ordinary loud and more demanding child look much louder and demanding than it objectively is. And then two more girls happened, seemingly easier again. Brook definitely has gotten the short straw. Never forget the “school” episode with Tori. 
It’s interesting, both women tried the more healthy, active and less rigid way initially after the wedding. I think both men are rather laid back in terms of being the leader of the family and do help much more then expected.  But Erin, which I think is more into the Bates flavour of koolaid, stuck with it.

Both sets of children are lucky as the chances of more siblings have shrunken enormously due to unfortunate health problems. 
It’s actually very comforting to realise that neither 2ndGen couple seems to follow their mega family, hyper-fertile parents (willingly or not). 4-6 is still a big family but 10+ is definitely something else.

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freethemall
7 hours ago, just_ordinary said:

Alyssa very well may have a favourite but she hasn’t publicly shown such a big difference in how she talks about her children. I mean, I get it. If you finally, after several miscarriages, have your long wished for baby and an easy one at that - that is heaven. Brocklyn was very spirited from the beginning. How much of a handful your child is definitely also depends on your personality and past experience. A very easy and quiet child will make even an ordinary loud and more demanding child look much louder and demanding than it objectively is. And then two more girls happened, seemingly easier again. Brook definitely has gotten the short straw. Never forget the “school” episode with Tori. 
It’s interesting, both women tried the more healthy, active and less rigid way initially after the wedding. I think both men are rather laid back in terms of being the leader of the family and do help much more then expected.  But Erin, which I think is more into the Bates flavour of koolaid, stuck with it.

Both sets of children are lucky as the chances of more siblings have shrunken enormously due to unfortunate health problems. 
It’s actually very comforting to realise that neither 2ndGen couple seems to follow their mega family, hyper-fertile parents (willingly or not). 4-6 is still a big family but 10+ is definitely something else.

I think you're either confusing Erin and Alyssa or there was a word missing. Erin is the one who had multiple miscarriages before Carson who always seemed to be her favorite especially now that he may be her only boy forever. Not sure if it was Carson or Allie that was the easy one? But its understandable for both that the first is going to be a favorite in some ways because they were able to pour the most attention into them. I say that as I'm expecting my 2nd soon and am having a lot of anxiety about how I'll give similar attention I did to my first, if I'll love him in the same way way (I've been told by many this is normal and that it ill immediately see the whole "heart multiplying"thing and even without doing firatvyear scrapbooks the love will be the same).

I actually think Alyssa has indicated Lexi as a favorite, she always had more of a "keep sweet" countenance than Allie.

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mollysmom
On 3/22/2021 at 3:44 PM, Melissa1977 said:

I have a "white collar job" and I'm positive (for my own experience) that in "intellectual" jobs, more hours don't make you more productive, but the contrary. Brain needs to disconnect. I think that extremely long journeys are not a beneficial for the worker, neither for the employer. 

 

Thankfully I have a boss who feels this way. He does not want us "killing ourselves" by working long hours or weekends. He says people are much more productive when they're not exhausted and you can deal with the stress of the job alot better if you're not working crazy hours. I agree 100% I've just never had a boss that felt that way and I love it. 

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Melissa1977
2 hours ago, freethemall said:

I say that as I'm expecting my 2nd soon and am having a lot of anxiety about how I'll give similar attention I did to my first, if I'll love him in the same way way (I've been told by many this is normal and that it ill immediately see the whole "heart multiplying"thing and even without doing firatvyear scrapbooks the love will be the same).

You will love him equally, but no, you probably won't give him the same amount of attention your eldest had.  And it's not bad... I think many of us gave an extraodinary amount of attention to our eldests, so giving a bit less to the youngers is still right or even better. 

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Jackie3
17 minutes ago, Melissa1977 said:

You will love him equally, but no, you probably won't give him the same amount of attention your eldest had.  And it's not bad... I think many of us gave an extraodinary amount of attention to our eldests, so giving a bit less to the youngers is still right or even better. 

Actually, it seems that second children are often more relaxed, less rigid, even happier than the typical over-achieving first children. I wonder if they are better off because they get less attention?

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