Mrs. Midwest 3: Feminine Racism

[JermajestyDuggar]

50 minutes ago, Timetraveler said:

Husbear's name is Grant right? Grant Jr. it is.

It’s funny that I’m expecting this too. I wanted to name our son after my husband because his name was one of my favorite names. My husband didn’t ever consider naming a kid after himself. He’s not a narcissist that would demand it. But I could see Grant saying it has to be Grant Jr if they have a boy. I’m not a fan of men emanding it without their wife’s opinion taken into account. 

[Seahorse Wrangler]

Our son has as his first name my grand-father's name which was the first born son's name in his family going back to the early1800's, it is also my FiL's name and my late husband's middle name.

My late MiL was upset that the oldest grandson wasn't named for her husband because I'd claimed the name first. He was instead named for his maternal grandfather.

 

My sister named her second son after our father while my older daughter has the feminine form of his middle name as her middle name.

My mother and grandmother didn't want their names to be passed down and given how my name is associated with not being smart, I don't want another generation being blessed with it. 

 

[kaluce]

I bet it'll be something boring and biblical. I rewatched the intro to her video and she really... doesn't seem that excited lol

[cartouche]

3 hours ago, kaluce said:

I bet it'll be something boring and biblical. I rewatched the intro to her video and she really... doesn't seem that excited lol

I'll put my bets on "Matthew" LOL.

You're right, she doesn't seem very excited.

She's always seemed a bit bored and like her whole brand is a cope for her life. Now she's probably like, oh sh*t, this is real. It's not just a LARP anymore.

Call me cynical, but I feel that with how image-conscious she is, she probably sometimes resents that she settled for her hubby since he's below her league, doesn't have any traits that make him a desirable partner, and doesn't seem very caring towards her. In vlogs she's so performative about serving him that it's like, "Look how lucky you are to be with me!" I guess she'll cope harder by going on about how much more attractive her husband is to her than her better-looking Christian ex because he "puts her in her place" like she did before on Reddit.

I'm usually excited for people having kids, even fundies, but there's just something off about their relationship. I feel like MM tries too hard to convince herself and her viewers that she didn't settle.

[AmericanRose]

I notice MM removed her blogging/YT schedule from her Insta bio. Wise choice - she wasn't following it pre-hiatus anyway.

She seems to be back to her regular posting on Insta, however, and she also posted a new blog:
Sunday Series: Hope and the Invasion of Fear

She is quoting verses and for all her 'everyone is welcome!*' on her channel, I feel she's deep in the religion.

I feel sorry for their kid. And for Michigan.

Spoiler

We may think we know what we need or want in our lives, but God always knows better. And unlike the modern teachings of many American churches, we must remember that God DOES allow us to go through the refining fire. He allows His flock to experience hardship, persecution, sickness, and trials so that He may be glorified.

As humans, we have a very black and white view of "good things." To us, good things are having a lot of money, getting the milestones we want, having happy times with friends and family, and laughing and enjoying life.

Yes, these are all good things, and they are pleasurable, but not all good things ARE pleasurable. Some good things are extremely unpleasant, disagreeable, or downright painful. [Emphasis hers]

 

She seems so light and fluffy, but I read her blog and I'm like... eeeek.

Edited August 10, 2020 by AmericanRose

[kaluce]

13 hours ago, AmericanRose said:

She seems so light and fluffy, but I read her blog and I'm like... eeeek.

This blog post reads like she's INCREDIBLY unhappy right now:

"this is life we are talking about, not a Disney Channel sports movie! It's a broken system in a broken world, and the only thing we are guaranteed in this life is some form of disappointment or heartbreak along the way."

Holy shit- like, isn't this supposed to be a joyous time for her?  Why is she so focused on SUFFERING right now when she should be happy that "God" blessed her?

Going farther into the post, it's obvious that her issues with getting pregnant caused her to get more invested in this Doom and Gloom Christianity (my pet term for christianity where suffering is almost like, fetishized). Like in this statement; "And unlike the modern teachings of many American churches, we must remember that God DOES allow us to go through the refining fire." Allows you to experience great hardship and suffering? I'll pass, thanks. 

 

ETA: they also recently switched churches. I wonder if their old one was "too positive" for them. 

Edited August 10, 2020 by kaluce

[Marmion]

7 hours ago, kaluce said:

Going farther into the post, it's obvious that her issues with getting pregnant caused her to get more invested in this Doom and Gloom Christianity (my pet term for christianity where suffering is almost like, fetishized). Like in this statement; "And unlike the modern teachings of many American churches, we must remember that God DOES allow us to go through the refining fire." Allows you to experience great hardship and suffering? I'll pass, thanks

This has not been all that unusual within American evangelicalism  .  For example , take these two songs .  

Spoiler

 

Spoiler

 

 

[Giraffe]

@Marmion, I listened to (well, a minute and a half) Blessings. It's the first time I've heard it since leaving Christianity. I was funny when that song came out and felt really guilty that I never liked it! There was something about it I found off-putting but I couldn't put my finger on it. @kaluce you're right; pain is fetishized in the fundy world! That song in particular was the go-to in my circle for those going through a hard time and at the time I was convinced I had some hidden sin and that was why I didn't like the song! 

[kaluce]

3 hours ago, Marmion said:

This has not been all that unusual within American evangelicalism  .  For example , take these two songs .  

  Hide contents

 

  Hide contents

 

 

I’m definitely a total outsider to evangelicalism and while I grew up like, in an area where it was around, only the past few years have I been really learning about it. It’s absolutely so strange how these people are so content with feeling such heavy GUILT and shame allll the time. I don’t understand how they function ?

[Petronella]

It's important to acknowledge pain, and I don't find it weird that religious people try to find a place for it in religious context.

Fetishizing it is gross, but to me that's a problem with extremes, not with accepting the reality of difficult times and still believing in God.

[kaluce]

5 hours ago, Petronella said:

It's important to acknowledge pain, and I don't find it weird that religious people try to find a place for it in religious context.

Fetishizing it is gross, but to me that's a problem with extremes, not with accepting the reality of difficult times and still believing in God.

Acknowledging pain is fine, but there seems no room for celebration. It feels more like constant self denial ? but again- I’m not super educated on all the inner workings and details of that specific faith so this is my outsiders ~uneducated opinion lol

[Giraffe]

To me it’s the difference between acknowledging “this hurts and I wish I weren’t going through it and I need to sit with my pain for a while while I relearn how to breathe and find a new normal and it’s ok that I don’t feel like praising God right now” vs “I’m in pain but yay Jesus! Jesus takes my pain away yay!”

[Pecansforeveryone]

There also needs to be room to say "fuck the almighty deity that let this happen without  having to worry about begging forgiveness from said deity. It's also important to allow people the freedom to not have to believe everything happens for a reason. To not have  to believe a tragedy is part of a good and perfect plan. I know how personally anguishing it can be to force oneself to believe everything that happens is part of a perfect plan. 

[kaluce]

She's realllllllly pushing out that stomach. Her "bump" is so inconsistent in photos ahaha

[AmericanRose]

I have a feeling the farther along she is, the fewer full body pics we'll get.

So! MM posted a new blog:
Random Things That Have Improved My Life

I, for one, am eager to find out what these random things are!

Spoiler

Adding a tall folding stool to my kitchen
Now, I should have done this even BEFORE I got pregnant, but it's official: I need to sit down while waiting for the water to boil LOL.
I've never been pregnant, so I'm not going to judge what a pregnant person does, but... she should have done this pre-pregnancy? She makes it sound as though her home-making life is really tiring and tough, but her Insta Stories tell a different tale...

Tree Hut Sugar Scrub
I swear this stuff has been in and out of my possession since high school, but I recently repurchased it with a goal: leg exfoliation. While I do not suffer from strawberry legs, I watched this amazing video explaining the ins and outs of how to rid your legs of ALL bacteria to get the best shave ever.
Lol, of course she had to reassure her readers that she doesn't suffer from strawberry legs.

Witch hazel on scalp on oiling night
So I explained in my shower routine blog post that I usually do a hair oil treatment at night every two or three days and then wash it out in the morning. However, in these past few months I've noticed that my scalp seemed to be getting itchy and red. I upped the oil in my routine, hoping it would help, but it seemed to have the OPPOSITE effect, making my hair even itchier! So I did some research and decided to try witch hazel for itchy skin.
No snark here, just surprised she admitted to occasionally having an itchy and flaky scalp!

Extra strength Benadryl itch stopping gel
This is a lifesaver in the summer months when our unfriendly mosquito friends come out to play.
Also no snark here - MI is terrible with mosquitoes in the summer. I had no idea Benadryl made a gel! Though I would rather avoid the bites in general.

Grape-seed oil on growing belly
I've been relying on grape-seed oil to keep things lubricated for the inevitable stretching, and I've been enjoying it.
I C THIS WHOLE SENTENCE NOW. I guess grapeseed is the new thing.

Workouts for 50 year old women
Even before getting pregnant I was never interested in high impact or jumping workouts, but now with baby on the way, those are even LESS appealing! Thankfully, I have found the answer: workouts aimed at older women.
I seem to remember her touting walking as her amazing weight-loss no-bulk secret? Either way, most workouts you can modify... also, barre doesn't involving high impact or jumping! It is a tough workout, though.

THIS podcast about organization
These ladies motivated me to organize three cupboards, two drawers, and a closet just from two episodes. They are positive, upbeat, and HELPFUL! Love!
No snark here; I also love organising.

Having 2-3 kids toys in the house
So obviously in a year or so we will have MANY kids toys in the house, but I wanted to recommend to your average childless reader to have a couple kids toys in the house for whenever a kid might stop by.
Don't parents usually travel with essentially everything their kid owns? I dunno... this seems really weird to me. But I'm childless, so.

Wallgreens photo center and Walmart frames
It hasn't even been a week and I already have framed photos from our baby announcement photoshoot hanging and displayed in the house. THAT is how quick I am with photos these days LOL! So many people rely solely on the Internet for their photo needs, but there is so much joy in placing printed photos around your home. Guests love to see it and they will truly help you personalize your space!
Walmart? What happened to thrifting?? I personally use a local drug store to print my photos, and I like to find unique frames (I also refuse to shop at Walmart).

Smaller loads of dishes
And the last thing that has truly been working for me is to run smaller loads of dishes. I have been told this for years but never wanted to listen to this sage wisdom until RECENTLY when I realized that I find myself much more eager and willing to empty the dishwasher if I know that there is a moderate amount of dishes in there instead of my usual exploding at the seams arrangement.
I seem to remember a video of MM saying we should be careful of the environment, and that's why she thrifts... so I don't really understand this one. Of course it's easier to unload smaller loads, but that just means you have to run more washes, which uses more water.

 

 

Edited August 12, 2020 by AmericanRose

[kaluce]

 

4 minutes ago, AmericanRose said:

keep things lubricated for the inevitable stretching, and I've been enjoying it

For someone who's talked in detail about her intimate shower routine and lingerie, this is coming off high-key sexual. Gotta leave something for those thirsty bros following her. 

[freejugar]

There's plenty of no/low impact workouts out there, no need to jump straight into 50 year old woman workouts

[Pecansforeveryone]

I do think as she gets bigger, yeah fewer full body shots. Will she be able to be candid about stretch marks and the nitty-geitty of pregnancy? I kind of doubt it. 

[Stormy]

This has the same energy I felt when I invested in a foldable moon chair to slip under my bed when not in use. My TV is in my bedroom, so now I can curl up comfortably with my back supported instead of hunching over on the edge of my bed when I play video games! Caitlyn and I lead very different lives.

[quiversR4hunting]

32 minutes ago, AmericanRose said:

Adding a tall folding stool to my kitchen
Now, I should have done this even BEFORE I got pregnant, but it's official: I need to sit down while waiting for the water to boil LOL.
I've never been pregnant, so I'm not going to judge what a pregnant person does, but... she should have done this pre-pregnancy? She makes it sound as though her home-making life is really tiring and tough, but her Insta Stories tell a different tale...

I have had 3 babies. Only during the last month or so in the first 2 pregnancies did I feel the need to sit during traditionally standing jobs (blow drying my hair, dishes, etc.). The last pregnancy I had to sit earlier, she tried to come at 30 weeks and then she grew so big that the weight was hard on me (I am only 5'2 1/2" and small frame- size 4 or 6 most of my life). If she is this tired at first trimester, oh boy, we are gearing up for her being the first woman to ever be pregnant type posts. 

Witch hazel on scalp on oiling night
So I explained in my shower routine blog post that I usually do a hair oil treatment at night every two or three days and then wash it out in the morning. However, in these past few months I've noticed that my scalp seemed to be getting itchy and red. I upped the oil in my routine, hoping it would help, but it seemed to have the OPPOSITE effect, making my hair even itchier! So I did some research and decided to try witch hazel for itchy skin.
No snark here, just surprised she admitted to occasionally having an itchy and flaky scalp!

It could be standing under a hot shower with it hitting her head the entire time. Hot water = itchy skin (even on the scalp). She seems like a long hot shower type of person. 

<snip> 
Workouts for 50 year old women
Even before getting pregnant I was never interested in high impact or jumping workouts, but now with baby on the way, those are even LESS appealing! Thankfully, I have found the answer: workouts aimed at older women.
I seem to remember her touting walking as her amazing weight-loss no-bulk secret? Either way, most workouts you can modify... also, barre doesn't involving high impact or jumping! It is a tough workout, though.

Ugh. If a woman is active prior to pregnant she can do the same activities (sometimes needing modifications as body weight shifts). I know equestrian riders, runners, yoga, etc that all do their workouts throughout their pregnancy. The women I know continued with permission from medical professionals. Also they say don't start a new impact type activity (say riding a horse) while pregnant because your body isn't used to the movements. I remember trying to swing a golf club when I was 8 months pregnant the first time, oh boy was my center of gravity off! If I had kept golfing the entire time while my belly was growing I probably wouldn't have had an issue. (I tried swinging one just to see how hard it was to get around my belly, it was a funny sight.)

Adding more thoughts to AmericaRose's thoughts about MM's post. 

12 minutes ago, Pecansforeveryone said:

I do think as she gets bigger, yeah fewer full body shots. Will she be able to be candid about stretch marks and the nitty-geitty of pregnancy? I kind of doubt it. 

I think if her boobs get bigger we will be getting pictures that emphasize "the girls" as long as they are bigger than the bump. And in the picture that @kaluce posted, she is completely pushing out her belly. 

[Black Aliss]

On 4/16/2020 at 5:29 PM, Pecansforeveryone said:

Many of the Evangelical Christian's, I know aren't anti-Semites. Many of them are zealously pro-Israel/pro-Zionism. I know Stefan Moleneux, Richard Spencer, and company overlap with Mrs. Midwesr on some things. I just don't think anti-Semitism is one of them. 

I must respectfully disagree. They are pro-Israel because the Bible says in the last days before the rapture, the Jews will all return to Palestine. Where, presumably, they will die during Armageddon. Israel has to exist, and grow, because the hope, as voiced by more than one fundie preacher I was forced to pay attention to when I was growing up, is that ALL the Jews will abandon the diaspora and go to Israel. It's a short hop from that hope to driving the Jews back to Israel by launching waves of persecution towards them in the US and other countries. It's radical Christianists, not atheists and Muslims, who are setting fire to synagogues and painting swastikas on Jewish-owned businesses.

[JMarie]

7 hours ago, AmericanRose said:

I have a feeling the farther along she is, the fewer full body pics we'll get.

So! MM posted a new blog:
Random Things That Have Improved My Life

I, for one, am eager to find out what these random things are!

  Hide contents

Adding a tall folding stool to my kitchen
Now, I should have done this even BEFORE I got pregnant, but it's official: I need to sit down while waiting for the water to boil LOL.
I've never been pregnant, so I'm not going to judge what a pregnant person does, but... she should have done this pre-pregnancy? She makes it sound as though her home-making life is really tiring and tough, but her Insta Stories tell a different tale...

Tree Hut Sugar Scrub
I swear this stuff has been in and out of my possession since high school, but I recently repurchased it with a goal: leg exfoliation. While I do not suffer from strawberry legs, I watched this amazing video explaining the ins and outs of how to rid your legs of ALL bacteria to get the best shave ever.
Lol, of course she had to reassure her readers that she doesn't suffer from strawberry legs.

Witch hazel on scalp on oiling night
So I explained in my shower routine blog post that I usually do a hair oil treatment at night every two or three days and then wash it out in the morning. However, in these past few months I've noticed that my scalp seemed to be getting itchy and red. I upped the oil in my routine, hoping it would help, but it seemed to have the OPPOSITE effect, making my hair even itchier! So I did some research and decided to try witch hazel for itchy skin.
No snark here, just surprised she admitted to occasionally having an itchy and flaky scalp!

Extra strength Benadryl itch stopping gel
This is a lifesaver in the summer months when our unfriendly mosquito friends come out to play.
Also no snark here - MI is terrible with mosquitoes in the summer. I had no idea Benadryl made a gel! Though I would rather avoid the bites in general.

Grape-seed oil on growing belly
I've been relying on grape-seed oil to keep things lubricated for the inevitable stretching, and I've been enjoying it.
I C THIS WHOLE SENTENCE NOW. I guess grapeseed is the new thing.

Workouts for 50 year old women
Even before getting pregnant I was never interested in high impact or jumping workouts, but now with baby on the way, those are even LESS appealing! Thankfully, I have found the answer: workouts aimed at older women.
I seem to remember her touting walking as her amazing weight-loss no-bulk secret? Either way, most workouts you can modify... also, barre doesn't involving high impact or jumping! It is a tough workout, though.

THIS podcast about organization
These ladies motivated me to organize three cupboards, two drawers, and a closet just from two episodes. They are positive, upbeat, and HELPFUL! Love!
No snark here; I also love organising.

Having 2-3 kids toys in the house
So obviously in a year or so we will have MANY kids toys in the house, but I wanted to recommend to your average childless reader to have a couple kids toys in the house for whenever a kid might stop by.
Don't parents usually travel with essentially everything their kid owns? I dunno... this seems really weird to me. But I'm childless, so.

Wallgreens photo center and Walmart frames
It hasn't even been a week and I already have framed photos from our baby announcement photoshoot hanging and displayed in the house. THAT is how quick I am with photos these days LOL! So many people rely solely on the Internet for their photo needs, but there is so much joy in placing printed photos around your home. Guests love to see it and they will truly help you personalize your space!
Walmart? What happened to thrifting?? I personally use a local drug store to print my photos, and I like to find unique frames (I also refuse to shop at Walmart).

Smaller loads of dishes
And the last thing that has truly been working for me is to run smaller loads of dishes. I have been told this for years but never wanted to listen to this sage wisdom until RECENTLY when I realized that I find myself much more eager and willing to empty the dishwasher if I know that there is a moderate amount of dishes in there instead of my usual exploding at the seams arrangement.
I seem to remember a video of MM saying we should be careful of the environment, and that's why she thrifts... so I don't really understand this one. Of course it's easier to unload smaller loads, but that just means you have to run more washes, which uses more water.

 

 

She sterilizes her legs before shaving? Why? (And I'm an RN, so I know a thing or two about sterile environments). Through I would be interested in learning more about workouts for older women. I actually am 50, and have never been good at plyometrics. 

[AmericanRose]

3 hours ago, JMarie said:

She sterilizes her legs before shaving? Why? (And I'm an RN, so I know a thing or two about sterile environments). Through I would be interested in learning more about workouts for older women. I actually am 50, and have never been good at plyometrics. 

To avoid "strawberry" legs, I guess?

I feel certain MM could have just kept going on her walks... but then she would have one less item for her list.

[kaluce]

Nothing about her look here screams "elegant". She's wearing a little house on the prairie dress ffs. Just more of the same info over and over again I assume (I haven't watched but I can't listen to more basic "tips"  anymore)

Spoiler

 

 

[AmericanRose]

I know taste is in the eye of the beholder and all that, but... there is nothing about that neckline I find feminine or flattering.

"5 Ways to be More Feminine TODAY" - Feb 20 2019
"7 Easy Ways to Look More Feminine" - May 8 2020

I knew that that video sounded familiar!

I imagine a few months after Baby Midwest is born, we'll get an updated video about how they thrive on one income as a family of 3.