JinJer: When Shorts Attack!

[Kelsey]

I find it interesting that depending on which forum you're on, the made up child is either an absolute genius or has more special needs than anyone ever. I used to read one forum where you could watch people play one-up with their children's special needs. It is really bizarre. Why doesn't anyone have average kids anymore- the ones that get C's in school and act a fool when their parents are away?

[Mela99]

41 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

It is amazing how many people on the internet have genius children. 

I also love it when people are creating fake lives and they can't help but casually mention that they are hanging with brain surgeons, NASA engineers, or best friend and her movie star boyfriend. Dani did this one too. She wasn't just going out to eat she was going out to eat(with doctors). Adding the extra "I'm hanging out with someone I think sounds impressive" makes me roll my eyes. 

I am going out to eat for lunch(with President Obama), though. 

 

Only President Obama? If you were really awesome you'd be taking Biden for ice cream too 

[formergothardite]

I'm going for ice cream with Biden later, I didn't mention it lest it seem like I was bragging. 

[luxfilia]

7 minutes ago, Kelsey said:

I find it interesting that depending on which forum you're on, the made up child is either an absolute genius or has more special needs than anyone ever. I used to read one forum where you could watch people play one-up with their children's special needs. It is really bizarre. Why doesn't anyone have average kids anymore- the ones that get C's in school and act a fool when their parents are away?

I'm sure plenty of people are simply faking, but then again, I wonder if  parents with the straight-A /"genius" children might be more likely to spend time on forums? I dunno.

[MargaretElliott]

What about kids who were deemed extremely gifted in elementary and middle school, only to get to high school/college and find out they were just average? Thus facing the disappointment of parents who always believed you were capable of greatness? Anyone else? Bueller? Bueller?

Yeah, the genius child thing always strikes me as suspicious. I was always grades ahead in reading, but I couldn't remember my multiplication tables. I still can't, and I'm a college graduate. Thank god for smartphones, I always have a calculator in my pocket. Usually, a benefit has a drawback. Excessive humblebragging does not count as having flaws. 

[GoatZombie]

40 minutes ago, MargaretElliott said:

What about kids who were deemed extremely gifted in elementary and middle school, only to get to high school/college and find out they were just average? Thus facing the disappointment of parents who always believed you were capable of greatness? Anyone else? Bueller? Bueller?

Yeah, the genius child thing always strikes me as suspicious. I was always grades ahead in reading, but I couldn't remember my multiplication tables. I still can't, and I'm a college graduate. Thank god for smartphones, I always have a calculator in my pocket. Usually, a benefit has a drawback. Excessive humblebragging does not count as having flaws. 

I was exactly the same in school. I was far ahead with reading, writing, music and pretty much every subject except for math, which I barely passed and that is really what kept me from skipping ahead. Rather than nurturing what I was good at, teachers and to some extent my parents, just focused on where I "struggled". It was the same in university as well.  I actually failed the required basic math classes several times. They had nothing to do with my major of course, but the classes that did I always had exceptionally high marks in.  I think very few people can excel at everything equally. I feel like I could have excelled further if I was encouraged more with what I was good at. But the mindset was more "oh she can get an A+ in that subject, good enough!" 
  15+ years since I've been out of school and I still haven't used any of that damn math.  

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, Kelsey said:

I find it interesting that depending on which forum you're on, the made up child is either an absolute genius or has more special needs than anyone ever. I used to read one forum where you could watch people play one-up with their children's special needs. It is really bizarre. Why doesn't anyone have average kids anymore- the ones that get C's in school and act a fool when their parents are away?

My older son is very average when it comes to intelligence. I always found it so funny that he would always follow those baby development milestones exactly! When it would say, "your baby should be saying 4-6 words now." And he would be saying 5! Ha! 

Anytime I bring up that my oldest is average, people seem to think I put him down! Of course there are things he excels at like making friends and recognizing emotions. He's got a higher EQ than IQ and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that! 

[Georgiana]

15 minutes ago, GoatZombie said:

I was exactly the same in school. I was far ahead with reading, writing, music and pretty much every subject except for math, which I barely passed and that is really what kept me from skipping ahead. Rather than nurturing what I was good at, teachers and to some extent my parents, just focused on where I "struggled". It was the same in university as well.  I actually failed the required basic math classes several times. They had nothing to do with my major of course, but the classes that did I always had exceptionally high marks in.  I think very few people can excel at everything equally. I feel like I could have excelled further if I was encouraged more with what I was good at. But the mindset was more "oh she can get an A+ in that subject, good enough!" 
  15+ years since I've been out of school and I still haven't used any of that damn math.  

Man, I gotta disagree with you strongly here.  In a world where something like 70% of people work in fields not directly related to their degree, I think it's imperative that we ensure that graduates of any system are well rounded.  Plus, you learn more about how to learn from studying things that don't come easy to you.  

Life isn't always going to be easy sailing.  There are some projects I work on that come naturally to me and I FLY through them, loving every moment.  And then there are those that suck and I just can't get my bearings on.  But those are BOTH part of life, and when I get a tough project, knowing how to break it down and tackle it piece by piece is essential.  And those were skills I learned in subjects I HATED.  I think adults who never faced adversity as kids tend to be more fickle, prone to giving up if things don't fall into place right away, and that's not someone anyone wants on their team.  I want someone who will STILL nail their shit, even when it is a project that is difficult, mundane, and otherwise the worst.  

My Papa told me growing up "Everyone's best is nice and shiny.  You want the measure of a person, you have to see how good they are at their worst."  That's why when my aunt brought her now husband home to meet the family the first time, my grandfather picked a fight with him.  Everyone is great when they are on their best behavior, but my grandpa didn't care about that.  What he wanted to know was how this guy handled anger.  When someone was behaving irrationally, was he still a good person?  Could he still be respectful to someone who was perhaps a bit out of line?  THIS was the kind of man my grandpa wanted to make sure his daughter had.  And that's why I still subject people to whiteboard coding exercises in interviews.  Yep, it's absolutely the worst way to code.  It's garbage.  No one excels at it.  And that's what I want to see: how good are you when everything is stacked against you?  Are you going to turn in good work, or am I going to have to write it for you?

Plus, it was through classes I was required to take that were unrelated to my major that I found my truest love.  My favorite course I ever took in college was a course I only signed up for to check off a few requirement boxes as a sophomore.  It turned out that I was truly gifted in that field, and I never would have known otherwise.  Changed the whole trajectory of my life, and I couldn't be happier.

There's really nothing to learn from sailing through something you're good at (besides confirmation that yes, you excel here).  But there are all sorts of incredibly useful skills you learn from taking on something you are weak at and still making it through.  

[VelociRapture]

2 hours ago, formergothardite said:

It is amazing how many people on the internet have genius children. 

I also love it when people are creating fake lives and they can't help but casually mention that they are hanging with brain surgeons, NASA engineers, or best friend and her movie star boyfriend. Dani did this one too. She wasn't just going out to eat she was going out to eat(with doctors). Adding the extra "I'm hanging out with someone I think sounds impressive" makes me roll my eyes. 

I am going out to eat for lunch(with President Obama), though. 

 

I'm sitting here just kind of impressed that my baby is on track. Like, yeah she's not a genius but at least she's supporting her head on a consistent basis. 

I do have one problem with her though. She's three months and refuses to get a job - she's kind of lazy like that. It's about time she starts pulling her weight! 

1 hour ago, formergothardite said:

I'm going for ice cream with Biden later, I didn't mention it lest it seem like I was bragging. 

Joe Biden is all of us. 

[Grimalkin]

14 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

My older son is very average when it comes to intelligence. I always found it so funny that he would always follow those baby development milestones exactly! When it would say, "your baby should be saying 4-6 words now." And he would be saying 5! Ha! 

Anytime I bring up that my oldest is average, people seem to think I put him down! Of course there are things he excels at like making friends and recognizing emotions. He's got a higher EQ than IQ and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that! 

      I appreciate this very much. There is so much more to intelligence than academic progress, and so much more to success than merely being smart.

      A friend of mine recently went through hell with her oldest who was adopted. excelled until junior year of HS and went through a huge downward spiral involving mental illness rearing its ugly head. She likes to say "I aim for happy and well adjusted."

        

[Platipus]

1 hour ago, luxfilia said:

I'm sure plenty of people are simply faking, but then again, I wonder if  parents with the straight-A /"genius" children might be more likely to spend time on forums? I dunno.

My parents were like this, bragging and exagerating their childrens' achievements to make themselves look good. I wish parents everywhere would STOP doing this. It's harmful to 1 - your child, when they inevitably dissapoint you, 2 - their siblings, which will have impossible standards to live up to, and 3 - everyone else by creating a culture of competition.

 

If your child goes into a high-ranking career, it should be because they LIKE the job, not to impress and please you/society. 

[grandmadugger]

1 hour ago, MargaretElliott said:

What about kids who were deemed extremely gifted in elementary and middle school, only to get to high school/college and find out they were just average? Thus facing the disappointment of parents who always believed you were capable of greatness? Anyone else? Bueller? Bueller?

Yeah, the genius child thing always strikes me as suspicious. I was always grades ahead in reading, but I couldn't remember my multiplication tables. I still can't, and I'm a college graduate. Thank god for smartphones, I always have a calculator in my pocket. Usually, a benefit has a drawback. Excessive humblebragging does not count as having flaws. 

1

To the bolded, this was me.  I was put in the gifted program in elementary school.  Patted on the head and told how smart I was, took community college classes in high school, got to real college and found out that while my IQ says I am smart I'm barely average in the real world.  No one helped me to figure out social stuff, binge parties aren't social, or relationships.  It was a rude awakening and something I still struggle with.  

[vspielman]

54 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

I do have one problem with her though. She's three months and refuses to get a job - she's kind of lazy like that. It's about time she starts pulling her weight! 

Obviously, you simply haven't been scheduling this lazy child correctly!  Hop to before satan gets hold of her!!! 

[louisa05]

I know too many people in real life who think their kids are geniuses. My nephew's mother decided he was a genius by the time he was 5. She told him that all the time, too, and attributed his failures to people not understanding his genius. Results: he failed out of a prep school, failed enough classes his first semester of college to lose his scholarship and now failed out of his major. And none of it is his fault. My professional opinion of nephew's abilities has long been average student and great at multiple choice tests with some difficulty n reading comprehension.

My inlaws insist that their 8 yr old nephew is a genius. So do his parents. Their reasoning is a phenomenon I have seen frequently: kids are now reading and doing some basic math by the end of kindergarten. For most adults, those things did not come until 1st grade, so if their kids are doing it earlier--wow, they must be brilliant. Except it is really just because of curricular changes.

[singsingsing]

1 hour ago, Georgiana said:

Man, I gotta disagree with you strongly here.  In a world where something like 70% of people work in fields not directly related to their degree, I think it's imperative that we ensure that graduates of any system are well rounded.  Plus, you learn more about how to learn from studying things that don't come easy to you.  

[snip]

There's really nothing to learn from sailing through something you're good at (besides confirmation that yes, you excel here).  But there are all sorts of incredibly useful skills you learn from taking on something you are weak at and still making it through.  

That's an awesome ideal, and I agree with you insofar as you're talking about subjects that are difficult or unpleasant. But I never would have graduated university if I had been required to take math or, say, higher level science. It wouldn't have been unpleasant for me, it would have been completely impossible. I'm incredibly grateful that I was able to get a degree anyway. Much like I'll never be a ballerina, or compete in the Olympics, or swim across the English Channel, I'll never be able to do a job that involves accounting, become an architect, or get a degree in Physics. I'm okay with that.

Quote

That's why when my aunt brought her now husband home to meet the family the first time, my grandfather picked a fight with him.  Everyone is great when they are on their best behavior, but my grandpa didn't care about that.  What he wanted to know was how this guy handled anger.  When someone was behaving irrationally, was he still a good person?  Could he still be respectful to someone who was perhaps a bit out of line?  THIS was the kind of man my grandpa wanted to make sure his daughter had.

I think it's a woman's job to get to know the man she's dating and learn about his behaviour and reactions organically. It's not her father's job to 'test' her suitor. That would have been a red flag to me as the boyfriend.

[Mela99]

3 hours ago, formergothardite said:

I'm going for ice cream with Biden later, I didn't mention it lest it seem like I was bragging. 

I, for one, am green with envy. I wanna get milkshakes with Uncle Joe. 

[Georgiana]

3 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

That's an awesome ideal, and I agree with you insofar as you're talking about subjects that are difficult or unpleasant. But I never would have graduated university if I had been required to take math or, say, higher level science. It wouldn't have been unpleasant for me, it would have been completely impossible. I'm incredibly grateful that I was able to get a degree anyway. Much like I'll never be a ballerina, or compete in the Olympics, or swim across the English Channel, I'll never be able to do a job that involves accounting, become an architect, or get a degree in Physics. I'm okay with that.

I think it's a woman's job to get to know the man she's dating and learn about his behaviour and reactions organically. It's not her father's job to 'test' her suitor. That would have been a red flag to me as the boyfriend.

I didn't mean higher level courses, but I think it's important that you at least take the basics.  Higher maths may not be important, but if you're missing basic logic skills (which is why most universities allow coding or logic courses to fulfill the math requirement), that's sort of a red flag.  A technical certification is the correct award for a course of study that was focused on only one thing.  A degree implies, or ought to, a certain amount of well rounded study with a specialization in a certain area.  A college degree holder should be able to write decently, construct a logical argument, and be familiar with basic scientific principals, even if that is not their field of study.  From my experience, Gen Recs are already very flexible, bare minimum stuff.  I'm not in favor of making them more stringent, but I'm not in favor of abolishing them entirely either.  

And I'm not trying to knock technical certs.  I obtained one last year, and I'd say it was a more difficult year of study than any towards my degree.  But a degree lets you go into other fields BECAUSE it implies you are a well rounded student where a technical cert doesn't.  And I think that is a good thing, and we should continue to challenge students that way.

And I didn't mean to imply that my aunt did NOT test my now uncle.  Certainly she did, or she wouldn't have brought him over the pass.  But people in love overlook things, they miss things, and sometimes it's the people we love who need to bring these things to our attention.  Obviously, it's my siblings responsibility to make their own decisions about their partners, but does that mean I don't vet them too?  Hell no.  That's why I encouraged my sister to break up with her ex for years.  SHE didn't see his temper as an issue. SHE didn't see the red flags.  She's 9 years younger than me and had never been in an abusive relationship, but I had, and because of that, I had a different read on him.  One person can only vet another person so far.  We NEED the opinions of others to bring things to our attention that we may have missed due to our personality or lack of experience.  

[Irishy]

I have four kids, three of whom are managing very comfortably in school, if a little bored. One who is average and struggling with languages and homework. The only one I ever talk about to people is my average kiddo, cos he's a worry to me sometimes. I never ever talk about the other three, unless asked! I'm completely secure in the other three and frankly I take their competence for granted.  In my experience, parents who boast about their kids intelligence, reading level, grades, super powers, etc, are full of shit and compensating for their own disappointment in their kid's abilities 

[VineHeart137]

So... I guess now's not a good time to mention that my toddler just pre-enrolled at Harvard?

I also went ahead and put in an application for my youngest child to attend a special elite pre-school for the gifted. S/he hasn't been conceived yet, but a mother just knows these things, y'know?

[grandmadugger]

43 minutes ago, VineHeart137 said:

So... I guess now's not a good time to mention that my toddler just pre-enrolled at Harvard?

I also went ahead and put in an application for my youngest child to attend a special elite pre-school for the gifted. S/he hasn't been conceived yet, but a mother just knows these things, y'know?

 

You had to wait until he was a toddler?  Gah I had my grandson enrolled while he was still in the womb!

[Mela99]

My fur-child, Sonny, is obviously gifted. He learned on the first try to poop in the litter box. You guys don't know the weight on my shoulders raising such an intelligent little man. I just hope I'm strong enough for it.

 

[candygirl200413]

Whenever my parents would try to hype me up as a child, I always had the sassy remark like "I was 4 when I potty trained, I'm not that smart". But I also think it's interesting cause like at least now being out of my local school district it nice to not hear 24/7 about everyone thinks their child is the next Einstein.

[Bad Wolf]

I happen to know that both my grandsons are geniuses. The fact that no one else has recognised it is irrelevant. 

[Carm_88]

1 hour ago, Mela99 said:

My fur-child, Sonny, is obviously gifted. He learned on the first try to poop in the litter box. You guys don't know the weight on my shoulders raising such an intelligent little man. I just hope I'm strong enough for it.

 

Genius cats are sooo hard. Praying for your strength to continue through this trying trial/this season of life! 

[Georgiana]

I don't want to brag of course, but I'm homeschooling my cats.  They stay home all day, also I keep books in the house that they can get to, and since this counts for homeschooling human children in Rodriguii and Naugler-land, I will have to assume it counts for them as well!

We're un-schooling, of course, so they do not have a set curriculum.  Mostly they just study what interests them in a manner that interests them.  We tried more standardized schooling with the dog, and it didn't take, so we're hoping the cats do better on this method!

I am fully expecting them to graduate early.  Will they continue on to college?  Possibly.  There was a cat who was admitted to an Ivy League school a while back because someone checked the "Legacy" box on his application.