Another one bites the dust- Daniel Lockwood MERGE

[Jana814]

That's what I think, too. I bet he got someone pregnant.

Same here! Espically if his wife can't have anymore kids.

[TrueRebel1]

Same here! Espically if his wife can't have anymore kids.

Or maybe less due to the fact that his wife can't have kids...more due to the fact that fundies like him may have no concept of using birth control.

Maybe this is weird, but I always wondered if the quiverful men (or women) who cheat on their spouses actually use birth control when they cheat? It's been my impression that to fundies, bc is a far greater sin than adultery.

[WonderingInWA]

Or maybe less due to the fact that his wife can't have kids...more due to the fact that fundies like him may have no concept of using birth control.

Maybe this is weird, but I always wondered if the quiverful men (or women) who cheat on their spouses actually use birth control when they cheat? It's been my impression that to fundies, bc is a far greater sin than adultery.

If he got someone pregnant, I don't think it would have been on purpose. He's smart enough to know to use birth control (I would think, especially if he's sleeping with a woman who is not his wife), but he probably doesn't have access to it where they are (and I think Jaynee does the shopping, so seeing "condoms" on the list would give him away).

And of course, he's been talking the talk to his poor Mexican "subjects" that birth control is evil, so if he slept with a woman in his locale, she's likely one of his subjects and also likely not on birth control. Certainly a man who has 12 children understands you risk pregnancy every time you have sex.

[bunny]

My husband used to sell cars. He got out because it's hard to make a living at it if you have a problem with lying to people. And that's at just about any car lot. He had experience with several.

I remember way back when Daniel posted here. I for one sure didn't see this coming. How sad for Jaynee and the kids....hope she and they can find some peace.

[salex]

Sales is a good choice for former ministers. They can promise life changing results if the person just buys the right (fill in blank here)

Ted Haggard compared selling Jesus to selling Toothpaste. And, most of the disgraced ministers have proven they have no problems lying... so that makes it easier to find something to sell.

[anniebgood]

A few years ago I sent Jaynee a case of pumpkin puree so she could make pies for Thanksgiving and I had a nice email exchange with her. Daniel jumped in on it and he was so damn arrogant. I told him that I was a confident and well versed cradle Lutheran who accepted the grace God offered me and I was confident in my future lodgings in the kingdom. Those guys, don't preach grace. They preach hellfire and damnation and if you don't believe you are doomed. I think that he couldn't bully me down from my perch bothered him.

I think he's a horses ass and he has caused Jaynee to be so afraid that nothing she can do will ever get her into heaven. :nenner:

[Patsy]

I think he's a horses ass and he has caused Jaynee to be so afraid that nothing she can do will ever get her into heaven. :nenner:

Her second (third?) time getting saved really concerned me.

[WonderingInWA]

A few years ago I sent Jaynee a case of pumpkin puree so she could make pies for Thanksgiving and I had a nice email exchange with her. Daniel jumped in on it and he was so damn arrogant. I told him that I was a confident and well versed cradle Lutheran who accepted the grace God offered me and I was confident in my future lodgings in the kingdom. Those guys, don't preach grace. They preach hellfire and damnation and if you don't believe you are doomed. I think that he couldn't bully me down from my perch bothered him.

I think he's a horses ass and he has caused Jaynee to be so afraid that nothing she can do will ever get her into heaven. :nenner:

I remember Jaynee talking about the pumpkin on her blog because of all the things she misses and can't get in Mexico, it's canned pumpkin. That was nice of you!

Interesting that Daniel rubbed you the wrong way even back then. Jaynee has written from time to time on the blog how she often feels she is failing in her walk. I'm sure some of it is self-inflicted, but a lot of it probably stems from how he has groomed her to feel about her role.

[Cassia]

A few years ago I sent Jaynee a case of pumpkin puree so she could make pies for Thanksgiving and I had a nice email exchange with her. Daniel jumped in on it and he was so damn arrogant. I told him that I was a confident and well versed cradle Lutheran who accepted the grace God offered me and I was confident in my future lodgings in the kingdom. Those guys, don't preach grace. They preach hellfire and damnation and if you don't believe you are doomed. I think that he couldn't bully me down from my perch bothered him.

I think he's a horses ass and he has caused Jaynee to be so afraid that nothing she can do will ever get her into heaven. :nenner:

Why did he feel the need to jump in on an email exchange between two grown ass women talking about canned pumpkin purée?

[tkr322]

Wow Prevention, what an eye opening post. So sad that she is/was abused and is still in the relationship. Then again he took her away to a 3rd world country, apart from any family or friends so of course it would be much easier to abuse and manipulate her there. I just hope he's never hurt her in front of their children.

Also, you mention that him and his brothers were hyper-sexed and had many sisters. One wonders if those poor sisters were also abused or if, God-forbid, his daughters have been abused, too. I think we all immediately think "oh he cheated on his wife" but I would hate for it to be something even more terrible like child abuse on his own children or other children in their church. I'm sure he easily had alone time access to many children.

[Jana814]

Thanks Prevention for the information on Jaynee & Dan. So horrible that he abused her. I wonder what made her still marry him if he was abusive.

[MrsFoxx]

Thanks Prevention for the information on Jaynee & Dan. So horrible that he abused her. I wonder what made her still marry him if he was abusive.

The same kind of thing that has trapped other recent Fundy victims, I would guess. Someone wears down your self worth, makes you feel they are the only person who will ever see value in you, reminds you what a horrible person you are and makes you feel that they really "just want to help you be a better person." Add a generous dose of charming when not abusing, so you feel that they really only want the best for you, and you have it. Abusive relationships don't happen overnight. An abuser grooms you, sometimes you and your whole family.

[thoughtful]

From what Prevention wrote, it does sound like Jaynee has been pulled in by a manipulator. :(

[Prevention]

Need to make a quick clarification: Dan is the oldest of 12 kids, all but 3 being boys---means--9 boys and 3 girls in the bunch.

[WonderingInWA]

From what Prevention wrote, it does sound like Jaynee has been pulled in by a manipulator. :(

But it was a lonnnnngg time -- they've been married something like 18 years and presumably dated a year or two before that. So it didn't happen over night.

[WonderingInWA]

Need to make a quick clarification: Dan is the oldest of 12 kids, all but 3 being boys---means--9 boys and 3 girls in the bunch.

Interesting that he and Jaynee also have 12 -- 9 boys and 3 girls.

[Prevention]

But it was a lonnnnngg time -- they've been married something like 18 years and presumably dated a year or two before that. So it didn't happen over night.

They started dating in high school and she was married at 21 or 22. I think they dated at least 4 years with a year off for when Jaynee's Dad found out about physical abuse.

[Prevention]

Interesting that he and Jaynee also have 12 -- 9 boys and 3 girls.

No wait...my wife just told me that they have 10 boys and 2 girls. IDK, LOL. I thought there was a 3rd girl in there somewhere. :whistle:

[thoughtful]

But it was a lonnnnngg time -- they've been married something like 18 years and presumably dated a year or two before that. So it didn't happen over night.

? Not sure why you wrote that as an answer to me, with "but" at the beginning -- can you clarify?

I certainly agree that it can take a long time -- that's the nature of subtle grooming by people who don't show their true colors right away. That's how ordinarily sensible and decent people get pulled in.

Assuming Prevention's POV is accurate, it sounds like Jaynee could have taken a whole other life path if it weren't for meeting him, which saddens me.

[WonderingInWA]

? Not sure why you wrote that as an answer to me, with "but" at the beginning -- can you clarify?

I certainly agree that it can take a long time -- that's the nature of subtle grooming by people who don't show their true colors right away. That's how ordinarily sensible and decent people get pulled in.

Assuming Prevention's POV is accurate, it sounds like Jaynee could have taken a whole other life path if it weren't for meeting him, which saddens me.

Sorry -- "pulled in" to me made it sound rapid, but that was probably not what you meant (and probably my own misinterpretation).

ETA: My apologies! :)

[thoughtful]

Sorry -- "pulled in" to me made it sound rapid, but that was probably not what you meant (and probably my own misinterpretation).

ETA: My apologies! :)

Ah, got it -- thanks for clarifying!

I just looked at what I wrote, and "has been pulled in" does sound like it was something recent -- sorry I was unclear.

[medievalist1980]

Sorry I wasn't completely clear earlier. I did mean that I think the moral failing is an affair due to Daniel trying to have more children as I could see him feeling that HE didn't decide his quiver was full (even if God did via a hysterectomy - or at least to me it would seem like a pretty blatant closing of the womb).

If they head back to the states with an additional adopted baby ... I won't be completely shocked.

[WonderingInWA]

Sorry I wasn't completely clear earlier. I did mean that I think the moral failing is an affair due to Daniel trying to have more children as I could see him feeling that HE didn't decide his quiver was full (even if God did via a hysterectomy - or at least to me it would seem like a pretty blatant closing of the womb).

If they head back to the states with an additional adopted baby ... I won't be completely shocked.

I thought about the possibility of him adopting the baby, too, if in fact that's what is going on. The timing would be about right. Jaynee's last happy blog post was in Jan/Feb about how her husband was encouraging her to ramp up her blogging because she liked it so much and she'd made a plan to do it several times a week. And then, she fell silent after a couple initial posts. Which may have been (probably was) around the time she would have found out about a pregnancy that wasn't hers. So based on that idea, the baby could very well be due anytime up until July when they are being ordered back to the States (well, are probably being offered the money to move as a last supportive effort and if they don't take it, that's their decision).

All pure speculation on my part, though.

[Letgo]

No wait...my wife just told me that they have 10 boys and 2 girls. IDK, LOL. I thought there was a 3rd girl in there somewhere.

They have three girls. Third, fifth, and ninth children are girls.

Edited: Oh, sorry! Obviously, I thought he meant Jaynee and Daniel. I wonder how the other boys in Daniel's family turned out. Are there others like him? Did his position as firstborn in a large family influence his control issues?

[Coconut Flan]

I think he meant Daniel's parents. That Daniel was one of ten boys and two girls.