Another one bites the dust- Daniel Lockwood MERGE

[FakePigtails]

I would like to know too! Scrubbing always piques the curiosity.

And leads to assuming the worst

[nokidsmom]

And leads to assuming the worst

Which means they might be better off leaving things alone. Especially if what they have up isn't going to give any clues.

[meee]

Wow! I actually followed Jaynee with interest (not snark) and was NOT expecting something like this! I didn't realize there were other blogs though, did someone get screenshots of the son's blog?

I hope everything works out for the best for them. I don't agree with their philosophy/politics, but she actually seems to love her family.

Wow.

[formergothardite]

Is there room for one more in the Bitch Corner?

The Bitch Corner is going to be getting crowded. After that last post by Jaynee where she tries to get women to go against the government advice I can't muster up any sympathy for her. I don't think she is a great, loving mother either. This right here:

We’ve had times when the children needed shoes. But I’d rather have children with no shoes than shoes and no children.

shows she is a child collector.

[medievalist1980]

I thought after the last pregnangy/miscarriage that Jaynee couldn't physically have any more children (was there a hysterectomy?) or am I confusing her with someone else? If it was the Lockwoods, I'm assuming this is behind Daniel's moral failings as he may have felt his quiver was not yet full.

[Jana814]

The Bitch Corner is going to be getting crowded. After that last post by Jaynee where she tries to get women to go against the government advice I can't muster up any sympathy for her. I don't think she is a great, loving mother either. This right here:

We’ve had times when the children needed shoes. But I’d rather have children with no shoes than shoes and no children.

shows she is a child collector.

Add me to the bitch corner I completely agree w/ what u guys r saying!

[formergothardite]

I thought after the last pregnangy/miscarriage that Jaynee couldn't physically have any more children (was there a hysterectomy?) or am I confusing her with someone else? If it was the Lockwoods, I'm assuming this is behind Daniel's moral failings as he may have felt his quiver was not yet full.

Yes, she is the one that happened to.

I just can't figure out what they are going to do to support all these children. A work history where he refuses to work on Sunday and then gets fired after 10 years of being a missionary isn't going to go far in getting him a good paying job. I doubt Jaynee will work. Fundies might support them because of the kids but I don't see Shrader levels of money rolling in.

[debrand]

I thought after the last pregnangy/miscarriage that Jaynee couldn't physically have any more children (was there a hysterectomy?) or am I confusing her with someone else? If it was the Lockwoods, I'm assuming this is behind Daniel's moral failings as he may have felt his quiver was not yet full.

She couldn't have anymore kids and I am pretty certain had a hysterectomy. That was a few years back so I don't think that her lack of fertility caused an issue now. Despite the physical problems that having multiple children caused her, Janynee still encouraged women to have more children except in cases where the husband said no.

Remember her husband confessed to some sort of sin. The couple didn't seem to be against Jaynee having a hysterectomy so if it suddenly became a problem with their church board wouldn't they discuss this on their blog? It wouldn't make sense for Daniel to call his actions sinful if he was just protecting his wife's physical health. Something else happened.

Do they seem like pleasant people? Sure. Do I also believe that they taught harmful, fundamentalist beliefs that hurt a lot of people? Yes, and I am glad that they are leaving that country. I also believe that Daniel's sin must have been serious and not just a difference of opinion with his sponsors.

Unless we redefine bitch to mean "someone who is looking at the facts realistically," I don't think that anyone here is being bitchy.

[thoughtful]

Do they seem like pleasant people? Sure. Do I also believe that they taught harmful, fundamentalist beliefs that hurt a lot of people? Yes, and I am glad that they are leaving that country. I also believe that Daniel's sin must have been serious and not just a difference of opinion with his sponsors.

Unless we redefine bitch to mean "someone who is looking at the facts realistically," I don't think that anyone here is being bitchy.

This.

As I always say, one of the things I like about FJ is that there are people here who see past surface niceness, and know that it doesn't signify. Nice is not good.

There is a tiny percentage of feeling bad for her -- and, heck, even him -- in my mind, as there always is for even adult fundies. That's because the process that pulls people into this kind of thinking is, I think, so damaging.

Whether they were raised that way, or chose it for some reason of their own, they were, at one point, babies who had the potential to live without this dangerous crap. There's no such thing as a newborn religious fanatic.

But one can, as an adult, learn better, and they haven't. At this point, it's on them. I think they have continued to make choices that hurt others, and hold opinions that are offensive, and my sympathy is with the children and the locals.

[nausicaa]

She couldn't have anymore kids and I am pretty certain had a hysterectomy. That was a few years back so I don't think that her lack of fertility caused an issue now. Despite the physical problems that having multiple children caused her, Janynee still encouraged women to have more children except in cases where the husband said no.

Remember her husband confessed to some sort of sin. The couple didn't seem to be against Jaynee having a hysterectomy so if it suddenly became a problem with their church board wouldn't they discuss this on their blog? It wouldn't make sense for Daniel to call his actions sinful if he was just protecting his wife's physical health. Something else happened.

I took Medievalist1980's comment to mean that Daniel understood his wife couldn't have any more children, however he still felt the need to spread his seed--with other women. Now perhaps another woman's pregnancy (and the baby who will resemble him) have revealed his extracurricular activities.

If it were a sexual indiscretion (which I suspect it was--it's always either sex or money, and the Lockwoods didn't live high on the hog), I doubt he would just come out with it on his own and put his children at risk. Someone either caught him in flagrante delicto or the other woman/girl is pregnant and asking for money/support.

[WonderingInWA]

That's what I think, too. I bet he got someone pregnant.

[tkr322]

That's what I think, too. I bet he got someone pregnant.

I guess this would make sense. Otherwise if it were just an affair he could easily cover that up as the women down there would be easily influenced by their influential pastor and keep it hush hush if he told them to. But if a baby were involved it'd be much less easy to cover that up. Although if they're making him leave Mexico (which honestly a church/mission team can't make you leave... I'm sure they could stay there were financially able to do so which I'm sure they aren't) then that would make less sense as he wouldn't see the baby after it's born then.

Also wondering, does the church own the home they live in down there? What about their van?

[Georgiana]

That's what I think, too. I bet he got someone pregnant.

That was my gut instinct too.

[Prevention]

I have been a reader of this site for many yrs but only just joined. I know the Lockwoods very well. I grew up with them as well as with Jaynee's family. I was good friends with Daniel at one point and I know Jaynee's sisters.

First, I agree that no one here deserves an explanation but his supporting churches definitely do. Second, I do not believe that this was anything illegal or financial but rather sexual in nature as some have pointed out. Knowing the Daniel that I grew up with: it was most certainly sexual in nature. He was always going after the girls in class at school. He even dated the principal's daughter at one point but had to break it off for touching her inappropriately. Daniel comes from a family of 12 with all but 3 being boys and all those boys are hyper-sexed. Daniel's dad is a bizarre man, but I digress.

I read through here and saw someone asking about Jaynee's family. I know her family well. Although I haven't seen them in recent years I do know that they are sad about her situation. Jaynee's family is genuine and kind--good down to Earth people who were smoothed talked by Daniel like most people are. They had their reservations about their marriage and tried to keep them apart. Daniel was physically abusive toward Jaynee before they were married and that had her Dad in an uproar. Then Dan comes across so repentative and sincere and he just smooth talks his way out of anything. He's been like that since he was a kid---always a charmer, very polite as others have pointed out, but he is a deceptive guy. I never liked him so I don't mind telling it like it is. For those who wondered about Dan's job history-yeah he worked at a grocery store in town for like 10 yrs but his most successful position was at selling food door to door. I know the name of the company but won't put it here. He made good $$$$ doing that. He sold to my parents--one of the things he would do is hand out pictures of his 7 or 8 kids at the time and ppl felt compelled to order from him.

Jaynee is a good girl. I mean an all-around-wholesome-good-girl. One of the sweetest girls I have ever met. I saw her change when she started dating Dan. He manipulated her. She went from being a smart/intelligent/think for yourself woman to a lapdog for him. I know her family was concerned for her and concerned about the multiple pregnancies and the utter lack of regard for her health. My sister was good friends with Jaynee's sister so I have heard some stories. It is all 3rd hand so I won't divulge it here. I don't mind shedding light on some questions ppl have on here but I won't reveal what happened if it ever comes out. It just isn't anyone's business ya know? I feel sorry for Jaynee and those kids....those poor kids...hopefully they will come back to their hometown. I can tell you that I don't think that Jaynee would ever leave him. Dan's Mom FINALLY left his Dad and remarried awhile back. I just cannot see Jaynee ever leaving him after reading her blog for so many years and seeing how far gone she is. He is her world and she worships him instead of God. I am sure that Dan is already spinning this around and somehow making it her fault-he is just that deceptive. If anyone here were to have a face to face convo with Daniel you would walk away thinking that he was a great jolly fellow. He needs to be a used car salesmen so if you are reading this Dan, go ahead and become a USED CAR SALESMEN. Find some other ppl to lie to besides the good woman you never deserved and used up like trash.

To answer other questions: They own their home and van in Mexico.

I'm not interested in stirring the pot. People stop talking when ppl get answers and stop speculating. Christians mess up. Fundies mess up. Doesn't mean that God isn't real. Just means that the Bible is right that EVERYBODY is a sinner and no one is above that.

[Cleopatra7]

I have been a reader of this site for many yrs but only just joined. I know the Lockwoods very well. I grew up with them as well as with Jaynee's family. I was good friends with Daniel at one point and I know Jaynee's sisters.

First, I agree that no one here deserves an explanation but his supporting churches definitely do. Second, I do not believe that this was anything illegal or financial but rather sexual in nature as some have pointed out. Knowing the Daniel that I grew up with: it was most certainly sexual in nature. He was always going after the girls in class at school. He even dated the principal's daughter at one point but had to break it off for touching her inappropriately. Daniel comes from a family of 12 with all but 3 being boys and all those boys are hyper-sexed. Daniel's dad is a bizarre man, but I digress.

I read through here and saw someone asking about Jaynee's family. I know her family well. Although I haven't seen them in recent years I do know that they are sad about her situation. Jaynee's family is genuine and kind--good down to Earth people who were smoothed talked by Daniel like most people are. They had their reservations about their marriage and tried to keep them apart. Daniel was physically abusive toward Jaynee before they were married and that had her Dad in an uproar. Then Dan comes across so repentative and sincere and he just smooth talks his way out of anything. He's been like that since he was a kid---always a charmer, very polite as others have pointed out, but he is a deceptive guy. I never liked him so I don't mind telling it like it is. For those who wondered about Dan's job history-yeah he worked at a grocery store in town for like 10 yrs but his most successful position was at selling food door to door. I know the name of the company but won't put it here. He made good $$$$ doing that. He sold to my parents--one of the things he would do is hand out pictures of his 7 or 8 kids at the time and ppl felt compelled to order from him.

Jaynee is a good girl. I mean an all-around-wholesome-good-girl. One of the sweetest girls I have ever met. I saw her change when she started dating Dan. He manipulated her. She went from being a smart/intelligent/think for yourself woman to a lapdog for him. I know her family was concerned for her and concerned about the multiple pregnancies and the utter lack of regard for her health. My sister was good friends with Jaynee's sister so I have heard some stories. It is all 3rd hand so I won't divulge it here. I don't mind shedding light on some questions ppl have on here but I won't reveal what happened if it ever comes out. It just isn't anyone's business ya know? I feel sorry for Jaynee and those kids....those poor kids...hopefully they will come back to their hometown. I can tell you that I don't think that Jaynee would ever leave him. Dan's Mom FINALLY left his Dad and remarried awhile back. I just cannot see Jaynee ever leaving him after reading her blog for so many years and seeing how far gone she is. He is her world and she worships him instead of God. I am sure that Dan is already spinning this around and somehow making it her fault-he is just that deceptive. If anyone here were to have a face to face convo with Daniel you would walk away thinking that he was a great jolly fellow. He needs to be a used car salesmen so if you are reading this Dan, go ahead and become a USED CAR SALESMEN. Find some other ppl to lie to besides the good woman you never deserved and used up like trash.

To answer other questions: They own their home and van in Mexico.

I'm not interested in stirring the pot. People stop talking when ppl get answers and stop speculating. Christians mess up. Fundies mess up. Doesn't mean that God isn't real. Just means that the Bible is right that EVERYBODY is a sinner and no one is above that.

Thank you for your response, Prevention. It sounds like this is at heart a classic domestic violence situation, with mentions of "God" thrown in every now and then for good measure. Whatever happens, I hope Jaynee can find herself again, for her sake and for her children's sake. :cry:

[Georgiana]

I've always thought that the jump from Biblical Patriarchy to "I deserve a second wife/new woman when my first can no longer give me children/is no longer young/cannot fulfill my desires because of health issues" was deceptively short.

I mean, this isn't as uncommon as it should be in secular society. Take a society where the man is a God and all his desires must be fulfilled and where a book which contains polygamy is touted as law, and I don't see what else you're going to get.

These men have been so spoiled and catered to for so long, they've forgotten how to tell themselves 'no'.

[debrand]

Thank you for giving us some information on the Lockwoods. Hopefully, they will return to their hometown where Jaynee and the kids can get support.

Among the people that I know who were in abusive relationships, the first sign of abuse was never physical, it always involved tearing down the other person's confidence.

[apple1]

... If anyone here were to have a face to face convo with Daniel you would walk away thinking that he was a great jolly fellow. He needs to be a used car salesmen so if you are reading this Dan, go ahead and become a USED CAR SALESMEN...

Aside: Every instance I have known IRL in which a pastor had a "moral failure" resulted in his next career being car sales. (Really.)

[Howl]

Quietly curious how news of the moral failure got back to the home church in the US.....

[Palimpsest]

Aside: Every instance I have known IRL in which a pastor had a "moral failure" resulted in his next career being car sales. (Really.)

Come to think of it, me too! I always assumed it was because car sales are usually commission only and references and experience are not required. John Shrader also sold cars for a while.

If even half of what Prevention is saying about Daniel Lockwood's abusiveness is true, then I am truly sorry for Jaynee. I believe it is true.

I still remember when she was looking utterly exhausted, overwhelmed and depressed before the birth of one of the later babies, she said that Daniel preached at her that joy comes from within and that she should examine her failings. Or some crap like that making everything all her fault.

I hope Jaynee's family can give her support and, if possible, get her and the kids away from Daniel now he's demonstrated a "moral failure." I'm not terribly optimistic though.

[Prevention]

The letter that was posted on their blog was also sent out in a mass email to anyone who was on their email list. Word has not spread to my knowledge. ppl who got the email know.

[Prevention]

Quietly curious how news of the moral failure got back to the home church in the US.....

The letter that was posted on their blog was also sent out in a mass email to anyone who was on their email list. Word has not spread to my knowledge. ppl who got the email know.

[Letgo]

Thank you, Prevention. I have been reading Jaynee's blog for years. She always seemed like such a warm, caring person. Jaynee seems to really love her children and to enjoy being a mother. Some of her comments about herself made me very uncomfortable, however. I mean the ones about how she was a terrible wife, especially in the early years of the marriage, and she has such a wonderful husband, how Daniel is so patient with her, with her failures, shortcomings, her faults. Daniel shows her how she erred, sets her straight, is so wise, etc. Jaynee forever appeared to be in the wrong and in need of instruction. And Daniel was there to do just that. Reading your post confirmed my suspicions about Daniel. He seemed to be a controlling, manipulative, abusive person. No one could ever be so right and wonderful all the time as Jaynee's posts made him seem to be-unless he "taught" and manipulated her to believe that over the years.

I think Jaynee is a victim. As are the children. Some FJers may believe Jaynee is just as bad as Daniel, but I think she has been groomed and then mentally (and possibly in other ways) beaten down for years. I feel sorry for the family. And for the latest victim in Mexico. I am betting that he confessed because he was found out, or as some suspect, he got someone pregnant.

Perhaps returning to the US will help Jaynee and the children, especially if they are near her family. At least I hope this is the case.

[WonderingInWA]

All speculation about the moral sin aside, Daniel's letter states "My pastor and church have given me three months to transition from Mexico to the United States and to find a Mexican pastor to take over the ministry here."

He has to find a Mexican pastor to take over the ministry? Good luck with that one!

[apple1]

Come to think of it, me too! I always assumed it was because car sales are usually commission only and references and experience are not required. John Shrader also sold cars for a while.

If even half of what Prevention is saying about Daniel Lockwood's abusiveness is true, then I am truly sorry for Jaynee. I believe it is true.

I still remember when she was looking utterly exhausted, overwhelmed and depressed before the birth of one of the later babies, she said that Daniel preached at her that joy comes from within and that she should examine her failings. Or some crap like that making everything all her fault.

I hope Jaynee's family can give her support and, if possible, get her and the kids away from Daniel now he's demonstrated a "moral failure." I'm not terribly optimistic though.

You have a more positive outlook than I do on why failed pastors end up as used car salesman. I tend to think that the pastors in question moved from one arena of skilled manipulation of people into another arena of skilled manipulation of people. (Aside: I wish that I didn't have that cynicism; I wish I tended to more positive thinking).

I also feel for Jaynee. I really hope someone is able to get her in a place where she can make a better life for herself and for her kids, especially the daughters.