Another one bites the dust- Daniel Lockwood MERGE

[WonderingInWA]

I've read back over this thread - quickly, I admit. But, am I missing something? What's all this about a baby? Do we even know if his presumably sexual moral failing was with a female human being?

No, we don't. Just all speculation here.

[Caramel]

Just all speculation here.

Ookay. Whew! I thought maybe I'd missed the juicy revelation.

[TrueRebel1]

Sadly, I don't think most fundie churches see that as a moral failing. They'd just say he was toughening up the kids and teaching the wife she needed to submit more.

Yeah, the only way I'd see that being the case is if he physically hurt a family member enough that they had to go to the hospital, and somehow the mission board found out about it.

[Georgiana]

Well, I will be banished to the Prayer Closet/Bitch Corner for this one, but I don't give Jaynee Lockwood a pass. Because she is hurting other women.

I've been in manipulative/abusive relationships myself, and while I was the victim, I was still an adult. And I still bore responsibility for my actions. I still said things to others, did things to others that I later had to apologize for. I may have been manipulated into those views, but when I turned those views onto others, when I started trying to manipulate others, that was all me. I don't give a woman who abuses her children a pass just because her spouse is abusing her, and I don't give a woman who encourages other women to say in abusive marriages a pass because hers is abusive either.

Personally, I feel bad for Jaynee. But she still did what she did, and now it looks like going forward, her blog will be an encouragement for other women to stay in their terrible marriages. I don't support that. At all.

[Jana814]

Can someone give me their blog address. I've seen it before but I forgot it.

[Howl]

Jaynee's most recent blog post:

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Will you walk with us?

When I posted on Monday, I thought that letting everyone know what had happened was simply the right thing to do. Looking in on someone's life through a blog or other media or trying to share your life with another this way can be hard. I have loved sharing what the Lord has done in our lives and love being able to encourage another.

It wasn't an easy thing to post Monday, and while I don't share every little detail of life here, I have always tried to share both the joys and trials....the good and the not so good. And so I share what has been the hardest trial yet. I thought that after I shared, I would close this chapter of life via the blog. I would privatize the blog so I could someday print it up as a journal of our time here in Mexico, but didn't see the need to write further.

We have been so blessed by the outpouring of love, care, and prayer for our family. To truly experience God's grace in such a real way has touched our hearts in the midst of our pain and given us such hope.

The first few days after everything happened, I was in such a dark cloud. I remember standing in the kitchen, sobbing, and saying, "Lord, I don't know how to do this. I don't know what to think, what to do, what to feel, how we will make it. I just don't know how." I hadn't read a book on this. Nor would I have ever wanted to. I'd heard about this happening before, but I'd hear someone confessed, had to leave, and that was the end. I don't know what happens next.

Confession, repentance, brokenness, forgiveness, love, grace, growth....ashes to beauty. That is what I believe our Lord can do! I don't want Monday to be the end of our story. Yes, this chapter has come to a bleak end, but another chapter is about to be written.

Will you walk with us? I think the Lord may want me to share this journey. I don't know how often or how much. But while I don't know the way, don't know what lies ahead, and my heart is sometimes overwhelmed with so much, I know the ONE who is not only walking with me but is leading the way. I trust Him. I love Him. And I know He is here.

So many praying for us. Tear flow unceasingly as we hear from those who care.

Psalms 143. That is the Psalm the Lord gave me in my darkest night. I will share that with you soon.

[terranova]

Way to say nothing at all. My money's still on an affair.

[Palimpsest]

Can someone give me their blog address. I've seen it before but I forgot it.

lockwoodfamilytomexico.com

[green]

It's been brought up before, but I want to bring it up again: the Lockwoods weren't just converting Catholics. They were also trying to undo the social programs and education provided by the Mexican government to combat poverty and other social ills because Jesus.

The Mexican Government was trying to promote family planning as a way to combat poverty. The Lockwoods were telling people to not worry about how they were going to feed their children and just keep having babies. Because Jesus.

The Mexican Government was trying to empower women, educate them about domestic abuse, and make sure they knew they had rights and support to provide for their own families and the right to leave any man who was dragging them down. The Lockwoods told women to stay in questionably abusive relationships and potentially let their children starve rather than going to work. Because Jesus.

The Lockwoods were not helping anyone. They did not set up any social services. They set up a Church and preached a set of rules that contained many things shown to exacerbate, not alleviate, poverty. They used tricks like free food and Christmas boxes to lure people in. Their family set an unattainable example to their congregation. They may be nice people, they may have good hearts, but what they did in Mexico was deplorable.

I could not agree more. I am familiar with these policies. A lot of mexican families from one or two generations ago were numerous. My Mother for example has 9 brothers and sisters. Usually traditional Catholic families had the children that "God sent them". In the 70's-80's Mexican authorities started anti-poverty campaigns related to birth control, the slogan was "Small families live better".

The saddest part of the Lockwood's post is when she says that "Many here who receive medical care provided by the government are required to attend monthly meetings. My friends have told me some of what is taught at these meetings. A couple months ago, the meeting was on how a woman is not under her husband. If a husband asks or tells his wife to do or not do something, the wife needs to make her own decision. If a woman wants to work and her husband tells her he wants her to stay at home, that is abuse. She isn't to listen to that."

It seems that she is not familiar with Mexico's "machismo" and misogynous culture. A lot of Women in Mexico suffer harsh physical and emotional abuse from their partners- or other males-. Some of these Women still defend their abusers or believe that the abusive behavior is the woman's fault. The meetings that Jaynee mentions are meant as education and support for Women, not only regarding domestic violence but health issues in general.

I would also like to share an experience regarding "Missionaries" in Mexico. I had the great privilege of studying in a private University in Mexico. I went there on a full scholarship, since my family could not afford the tuition. Most of my fellow students were rich, as they were sons and daughters of affluent families. Many of them had every luxury: brand name clothes, electronic gadgets, luxury cars, international trips.. you name it. As you are aware, this is NOT the situation that most Mexicans live in.

Since Mexico is an evil evil Catholic country, we do not have our Spring Break on the same dates that US schools have theirs. On US Spring Break dates, we would get "Misionaries" from the US - at my private University. These were University students from the US on their Spring Break.. spending their time trying to convince us evil Catholics that our beliefs were, like.. SO wrong! Doing what is correct you know, being a "Missionary" for Jesus! Instead of spending their Spring Break getting drunk in Cancun, they would be "Missionaries" who would go and preach the right set of beliefs to rich mexican students. It is not like they could even pretend they were doing "social" work... :wtf: To this date, I still do not understand.

[Letgo]

Way to say nothing at all. My money's still on an affair.

I agree. There may not be a baby, but I think he got caught with someone. Jaynee's latest post mentions her praying and crying and says that she had heard of this happening before. Missionaries don't usually have access to much money, do they? And there isn't much to buy where they live anyway, so it would not do him much good. I don't think I have ever heard of a missionary money scandal. Sex scandal, yes. Jaynee also wonders how they "will make it." They could probably get through a money issue more easily than sex. Could it be porn? They have Internet so it could be a not-in-person sex issue.

[MrsFoxx]

I agree. There may not be a baby, but I think he got caught with someone. Jaynee's latest post mentions her praying and crying and says that she had heard of this happening before. Missionaries don't usually have access to much money, do they? And there isn't much to buy where they live anyway, so it would not do him much good. I don't think I have ever heard of a missionary money scandal. Sex scandal, yes. Jaynee also wonders how they "will make it." They could probably get through a money issue more easily than sex. Could it be porn? They have Internet so it could be a not-in-person sex issue.

Would they send someone off the mission field for porn alone, though?

[theologygeek]

Well, I will be banished to the Prayer Closet/Bitch Corner for this one, but I don't give Jaynee Lockwood a pass. Because she is hurting other women.

I've been in manipulative/abusive relationships myself, and while I was the victim, I was still an adult. And I still bore responsibility for my actions. I still said things to others, did things to others that I later had to apologize for. I may have been manipulated into those views, but when I turned those views onto others, when I started trying to manipulate others, that was all me. I don't give a woman who abuses her children a pass just because her spouse is abusing her, and I don't give a woman who encourages other women to say in abusive marriages a pass because hers is abusive either.

Personally, I feel bad for Jaynee. But she still did what she did, and now it looks like going forward, her blog will be an encouragement for other women to stay in their terrible marriages. I don't support that. At all.

There's a party in the bitch corner. I cooked enough Italian food to feed Italy. I make the best sauce, but don't tell my mother that.

I agree with you. While she may feel that she is in a hopeless situation with no way out, that does not give her a pass to hurt other women.

[Jana814]

lockwoodfamilytomexico.com

Thanks!

[theologygeek]

Since Mexico is an evil evil Catholic country, we do not have our Spring Break on the same dates that US schools have theirs. On US Spring Break dates, we would get "Misionaries" from the US - at my private University. These were University students from the US on their Spring Break.. spending their time trying to convince us evil Catholics that our beliefs were, like.. SO wrong! Doing what is correct you know, being a "Missionary" for Jesus! Instead of spending their Spring Break getting drunk in Cancun, they would be "Missionaries" who would go and preach the right set of beliefs to rich mexican students. It is not like they could even pretend they were doing "social" work... :wtf: To this date, I still do not understand.

It's a contest for them. They are more concerned with being right when it comes to Catholicism vs Protestantism. Watch some videos. Pay attention when they are talking about being saved. These types always get louder and stress "We are saved by GRACE, and not WORKS." I know this kind. I spent time with them. They absolutely hate the fact that there is a Christian faith out there that puts such an importance on works. It makes them go into a panic. They have had hellfire drummed in their heads for so long that they panic thinking that they might be judged on their works to the point that it might put their salvation in jeopardy. I wore one woman down years ago to get to the bottom of this nonsense and she said that deep down she was terrified that she would go to hell if she was judged on works. That's what it boils down to. Converting Catholics to Born Agains isn't mission work. It comes from a paralyzing fear of going to hell. You'd be surprised what fear does to some people.

[lipstickgoalie]

Lord god in heaven when will these Fundie bloggers stop using center alignment.

[terranova]

Would they send someone off the mission field for porn alone, though?

I think they would. Porn and masturbation are pretty high up there on the scale of bad things you can do as a human being, in their world. But Daniel would had to have either been caught, or confessed his sins. Both would have been very stupid.

[mypsychoticself]

I think they would. Porn and masturbation are pretty high up there on the scale of bad things you can do as a human being, in their world. But Daniel would had to have either been caught, or confessed his sins. Both would have been very stupid.

I don't think he would have been kicked out if he confessed, unless it was something they would consider really bad.

[MrsFoxx]

I don't think he would have been kicked out if he confessed, unless it was something they would consider really bad.

I agree, mypsychoticself. Gay porn? Maybe. Posting videos of himself? Maybe?

In my experience in Christian circles, porn is a struggle that is like pridehumbleshame - proud I have such a manly sex drive, humble that I have misused my manly sex drive in this way, shame that I was caught - it's great fodder for confessional sermons - how I've grown and changed and how the Lord has sanctified my lust.

ETA: and this is only a man-thing. God help you if you're a girl porn user - that's just perverted.

[yetanothermeg]

Maybe hookers? Either hookers or an affair. If his wife had a hysterectomy that can cause pain and difficulty with sex, so my guess is he stepped outside the marriage.

[Howl]

If Ted Haggard can be "rehabilitated" ..... phoenix like, from the ashes....

"Controversy involving Haggard first erupted in November 2006, when a former prostitute, Mike Jones, said the pastor had paid him for sex over three years and had used methamphetamine in his presence.

Haggard initially admitted in interviews that he received a massage from Jones but denied having sex with him. He also said he bought methamphetamine, but threw it away instead of using it."

I'm intrigued that he has said he is bisexual, and yes, it is obvious that he smoked meth and had frequent sex with "that guy" but he also knows he can never truly come clean about it, because massage and buying and then throwing away drugs still has an air of not crossing some line.

He also admitted to a relationship with a male church volunteer at the New Life Church: "Boyd (replacement pastor at New Life) said an "overwhelming pool of evidence" pointed to an "inappropriate, consensual sexual relationship" that "went on for a long period of time ... it wasn't a one-time act." Boyd said the man was in his early 20s at the time. He said he was certain the man was of legal age when it began."

Now everything is hunky dory with Ted, God, and even with his wife & family, because Jesus. Ted leads a church and you can read about it on his Website! and on FaceBook!

tedhaggard.com/

His wife's book on why she stayed is the first thing you see on tedhaggard dot com

So, yes, you have not heard the end of Daniel Lockwood.

He's a manly man with a photogenic wife and kids and is charming and manipulative. IF he plays his cards right, is appropriately publicly contrite, there may be a book deal! :o

[southerncharm]

Kind of ironic that having too many children to feed and the inability to escape a poor domestic situation may just be around the corner for them, hmmm?

It's not kind of ironic. People getting their comeuppance isn't irony. (Irony is saying the opposite of what you mean. It's sarcasm, not coincidence.)

[WonderingInWA]

Tomorrow is Sunday. I wonder if they've already told their congregation? And, WHAT they've told them.

[margiebargie]

Wow! I was away from FJ for quite a bit. I've been reading through some of the big threads.

First, the Tool, then GotHard. Now Daniel Lockwood. They're falling like dominoes.

I know a lot of people think the Lockwoods are "nice" but they've always squicked me out. Maybe they'll keep their destructive beliefs to themselves for a while. The world could certainly use break from all their nonsense.

[Jana814]

Tomorrow is Sunday. I wonder if they've already told their congregation? And, WHAT they've told them.

I wonder what they told their congregation also I wonder if some already knew.

[tkr322]

I so wish I could have been a fly on the wall at their church service today! Although when was the first blog post posted about it again? Don't fundies usually do church on Wednesday evenings too?