Brandy starts over, all over again.

[brandyc]

Hi Brandy :)

There's a website called offbeatmama.com which I think you might find useful - they have info and articles on homeschooling and parenting on a budget as well as other parenting topics.

I am not a parent so I don't feel qualified to talk about the merits of homeschooling v public school, however I am concerned about you saying that you want your kids to be able to get into higher education if they want to. What are the homeschool regulations where you live? Will your kids get a GED? It is near-impossible to get into college without some concrete qualifications. Non-accredited colleges are a waste of time, quite frankly. Even training college for trades surely require at least a GED. They may just be pieces of paper, but those pieces of paper can unlock so many doors in your kids' future - even your future if you wanted to go back to school! Not to say all homeschoolers have this mindset, but certainly I've noticed a lot of anti-academia in fundie homeschooling circles, and that worries me.

I'm glad you decided to join us.

I'll check out that site in a bit :)

The homeschool regulations here in Wyoming are pretty relaxed. Every year, I need to submit a paper with the curriculum we're using that year. There are certain subjects I need to cover -- the basics: math, language, history, science, etc. But that's it. They don't have to approve it, though I'm sure they'd contact a family if they found their curriculum lacking.

Our girls won't be given a diploma by the state when they're done with high school. They can, though, go for a GED. It just means taking a few courses {I guess} just like anyone else going for a GED would have to do.

There are actually accredited curriculums families can use when their children are of high-school age ... and we've definitely thought of switching over to one of those programs. I am keeping records of what we do each year, even though it's not required by our state.

I do know a lot of homeschoolers who won't let their children go for a GED because it's like educating them all over again, but with the public school curriculum .... but Jason and I aren't like that. If you taught them right to begin with, they should breeze right on through the GED course and do just fine on the test, in my opinion.

[Sola]

Yes! Exactly.

Jason actually said the other day that while the conservative {or fundie as y'all call 'em} Christians may be nice people, we need to stay the heck away from all of their blogs. No more back and forth.

Sola, I answered your part-time public schooling question somewhere else in your reply to someone else on here. Didn't want you thinking I was ignoring your question :)

No, I probably missed it. I'm reading this thread and doing several other things at the same time, plus the thread is moving pretty quickly. Anyway, I have to go now and put my daughter to bed, so I'll say 'bye' now and hope that you'll be around here a little more. You can learn a lot from the people here.

[starfish]

Just stopped by FJ for a sec b/c being Friday the 13th and all, our hot water heater decided it was time to break... :evil: .I can live w/o many things, but hot water is not really one of them....Anyway, before the plumber gets here, just wanted to say "hi" to Brandy and say I'm glad you decided to stop by. I hope you stay around--you are welcome here. We haven't been easy on you but truly it's because we like you unlike some others (McKmama, etc).

I know you don't want to homeschool, but I was just wondering what the schools are like where you live and if the school bus comes by your house. Maybe if you went and just checked the school out, you might like it. Just an idea.

I recall that the zoo in Denver is pretty nice. Now it's been several years since we stopped by, but it is nice. Estes Park is also a lot of fun. I know the Colorado-ites tend to groan when I mention Estes Park, as they seem to think it's "touristy" or whatever, but we love it there.

[brandyc]

QFT. Seriously, I've been following you through your many blogs for a few years (which sounds super creepy now that i type it out...) because I actually LIKE you. You are funny and creative, you have cute kids, and your husband obviously ADORES you! I'm the one who sits in the front row cheering "Go Brandy!" when I see that you're enjoying a few beers every now and then, or reading Twilight because it's fun (and hey, it hasn't turned you evil yet now, has it?), or growing dreds, or taking your girls to the library! Who you are is awesome, and if you let yourself be YOU, you'll find it pretty easy to make friends :)

AWANA is a Christian organization similar to scouting: http://awana.org/on/demandware.store/Si ... ault-Start

I bet if you talked to the local Girl Scout leaders/Awana leaders they'd help you find rides for your girls.... there must be a *few* families in your trailer court who can carpool. I can tell you, I ADORED being a guide. My leaders Doris and Joanne were like special aunts to me, and I am still friends with some of the girls I guided with!

Ok, I'm not all hip on y'alls sayings yet ... so what in the world does QFT stand for?

No, LOL, Twilight hasn't ruined me. Either has Harry Potter, for that matter.

Ah, I've heard of Awana now that you mention it. Don't know many involved in it, but I've heard of it.

I probably could, you're right. Jason just told me a lil' bit ago that there are a few Girls Scouts in our town, actually. He's reading what everyone's saying while I type it lol. He's curious what's going on over here :lol:

I enjoyed Girls Scouts when I was in it. And I LOVED helping my folks out in their Daisy group when they did it when we lived in Bermuda. I've thought about starting a group myself a time or two in the past even.

And thanks for your cheering for us you crazy stalker you ;)

[Witsec6]

Ok, I'm not all hip on y'alls sayings yet ... so what in the world does QFT stand for?

No, LOL, Twilight hasn't ruined me. Either has Harry Potter, for that matter.

Ah, I've heard of Awana now that you mention it. Don't know many involved in it, but I've heard of it.

I probably could, you're right. Jason just told me a lil' bit ago that there are a few Girls Scouts in our town, actually. He's reading what everyone's saying while I type it lol. He's curious what's going on over here :lol:

I enjoyed Girls Scouts when I was in it. And I LOVED helping my folks out in their Daisy group when they did it when we lived in Bermuda. I've thought about starting a group myself a time or two in the past even.

And thanks for your cheering for us you crazy stalker you ;)

QFT= Quoted for Truth, and you're welcome.

[Guest Anonymous]

Yeah, lol, I actually do see the irony there. And in other things we've done.

Like I said on my blog, we've been kind of stupid. And made a lot of really stupid mistakes.

I've actually thought about grinding up a few of those buckets of wheat and taking it on over to the nearest homeless shelter as a donation. Because what the freaking heck was I thinking having this huge stockpile?! sort of thoughts.

I get it. Trust me, I do.

This is what I mean about being more frustrated because I think you're a smart person. You don't come across as hateful and nasty, either, like so many of the fundie bloggers. (That I have read, anyway. If Brandy has gone on any rants about burning the witches or stoning the gay people, I will stand corrected.) When you're reading Harry Potter and getting interested in tea and talking about loving other people I find you likeable, even. The thing is, if someone knows better but doesn't put the things that they should into practice, then it has the same end result as someone who is too stupid to know that they're doing it wrong in the first place.

If you settle into liberal Christian mode and get your kids' education and socialization on the right track that will be awesome and hopefully good for your family. But really you could be calling us a den of vipers, telling your daughters that dating will make them slutty, and throwing books in the trash by this time next week, so it's hard for me to throw a party for you yet. That said, I truly hope that this latest change sticks, and that you improve things for your children and yourself. Time will tell.

[Anise]

Our girls won't be given a diploma by the state when they're done with high school. They can, though, go for a GED. It just means taking a few courses {I guess} just like anyone else going for a GED would have to do.

I'm not sure how it is for your state, but for some states, there is a test for highschool students to skip out of highschool and get the equivalent of a diploma. For example, the CHSPE in California.

[MonkeyMomma]

Oh hey there, Brandy. Thanks for joining us. I was actually thinking about posting a comment on your blog, but since you're here, I'll do this instead.

First, a word of caution/advice from my observations: FJ is a pretty wide-open bunch, but calling of the bullshit will happen with speed and regularity. Important questions that are ignored will be repeated until they are answered in a clear manner, or the target of the question flounces. There are no free passes - and this is as it should be.

So, my comment - you know, if we encountered each other somewhere else in the world, we'd probably have a lot in common ... digging healthy food, beer drinking, into homeschooling (although I haven't decided if we are going that road yet), taking wisdom from the length and breadth of Christianity, yadda yadda. You seem like a genuinely nice person, with smart kids and a man who loves you, so kudos to that.

But here is where we part ways - you said in your comments on the ask me anything post that you would likely not allow your daughters to go to college. In fact, you even implied that the desire for higher education in a girl was something that had to be discerned as to whether or not it was "of God." And that just breaks my heart. I just don't get it. And no amount of Biblical citation salad will change that.

Your daughters deserve to be able to chart their future, even if it doesn't look like what you have chosen.

And finally, this:

Our girls won't be given a diploma by the state when they're done with high school. They can, though, go for a GED. It just means taking a few courses {I guess} just like anyone else going for a GED would have to do.

There are actually accredited curriculums families can use when their children are of high-school age ... and we've definitely thought of switching over to one of those programs. I am keeping records of what we do each year, even though it's not required by our state.

I do know a lot of homeschoolers who won't let their children go for a GED because it's like educating them all over again, but with the public school curriculum .... but Jason and I aren't like that. If you taught them right to begin with, they should breeze right on through the GED course and do just fine on the test, in my opinion.

If you're doing as excellent of a job homeschooling them as you seem to be (like I said, they sound like bright kids who enjoy learning), they may not have to take any special classes for the GED. When I got mine to essentially "graduate" from high school in PA, I simply registered for the test, took it cold, and scored high enough to be awarded a high school diploma by the state. Don't know how other states do it, but it may be an option for your kids in the future. :)

[brandyc]

Time for me to call bullshit, had you not scrubbed your blog I'd rub your nose in your lies. You were quite specific that your kids had no friends or playmates. You were quite clear that you and your spouse were not social. You were quite clear that the only folks you associated with were people who thought the same as you. The real world doesn't work that way. Talking to children about 'differences' or 'others' is not socialization. It does not teach kids who are virtually isolated how to get along with others. Interaction does.

You teach what you live, and for some reason you think religion is the bees knees and the most important thing you can instill in them. Well, sounds like your parents went for the firm foundation in faith, and it didn't seem to work for you did it? You're also discussing this in the future tense. Be here now. Do it now. You're so full of bullshit plans for the future that you let your children's present escape you.

riffle

Hey I'm all for calling bullshit when calling bullshit is required. But you're not right here. Yes, my girls aren't as social as we once were. However, I've said several times that we do have a couple of families here in town that we've hung out with several times. I've said it here and I've said it in comment sections on my blog. Granted, that's not as social as we used to be .... but both of those families do have children {one family has 2 boys older than both my girls, the other family has a daughter a year or so younger than my oldest, a son about my youngest daughters age, and a new baby} and my girls have loved hanging out with them. They ask about them when they see Jason and I are on FB all the time.

Yup, I said we wouldn't associate with people who didn't think or believe like we did. Can I call my own bullshit for a moment? Cuz that's not true. Both of those families I mentioned are actually more conservative than Jason and I are in some areas. One of the families is a bit more "liberal" in certain areas though.

Yes, I do believe our faith is one of the most important things we can instill in them. However, I'm not entirely sure where you got the idea that my family brought me up in religion because I never said that. LOL. My dad read us stories from the Bible as bedtime stories for a couple of years, yeah. We had a crucifix hanging up in our house, yeah. But we were not Christians at all. My dad thinks Jesus is a good teacher with good moral lessons, but that's it. My sister isn't sure she believes in a god at all. My mother is open to Christianity, but not a Christian. My parents are into horoscopes, tarot cards, and all that jazz. They always have been. I've never seen them step into a Church .... well, except for a couple of weddings.

Jason's family are the ones who are Christians. They're what some would call "liberal Christians" .... and they've NEVER agreed with our ways when we were on the more conservative flip of the flip-flopping. They raised him differently than that.

Except for our times when we cut out family, we didn't isolate our children from either side of the family at all. They all talked on the phone as often as we could.

And, as you probably know, we lived with Jason's family a couple of times. So our oldest was definitely exposed to lots of different ways of living .... via his family AND all their friends. And, again as you probably know, we lived with my dad for awhile. So they were definitely exposed to a way of life without any sort of religion via him. :)

Like I said, we were more social in the past than we've been the past 3yrs or so.

Yes, I spoke in the future. Heck, tomorrow is the future ... so I don't think talking about stuff in the future is bad. :)

As I've said, we've been making intentional changes for the better here. Cut me just a bit of slack and give me just a bit of time to get it going, alright? ;)

[brandyc]

You can also cook the berries like rice and have a delicious grain for salads or add honey and fruit to make a sweet porridge.

That's a pretty cool idea that I didn't know you could do. I'll definitely be giving that a try.

We probably will keep it all .... I was just saying I've had thoughts of giving some to the homeless too. :)

[Austin]

Oh hey there, Brandy. Thanks for joining us. I was actually thinking about posting a comment on your blog, but since you're here, I'll do this instead.

First, a word of caution/advice from my observations: FJ is a pretty wide-open bunch, but calling of the bullshit will happen with speed and regularity. Important questions that are ignored will be repeated until they are answered in a clear manner, or the target of the question flounces. There are no free passes - and this is as it should be.

So, my comment - you know, if we encountered each other somewhere else in the world, we'd probably have a lot in common ... digging healthy food, beer drinking, into homeschooling (although I haven't decided if we are going that road yet), taking wisdom from the length and breadth of Christianity, yadda yadda. You seem like a genuinely nice person, with smart kids and a man who loves you, so kudos to that.

But here is where we part ways - you said in your comments on the ask me anything post that you would likely not allow your daughters to go to college. In fact, you even implied that the desire for higher education in a girl was something that had to be discerned as to whether or not it was "of God." And that just breaks my heart. I just don't get it. And no amount of Biblical citation salad will change that.

Your daughters deserve to be able to chart their future, even if it doesn't look like what you have chosen.

And finally, this:

If you're doing as excellent of a job homeschooling them as you seem to be (like I said, they sound like bright kids who enjoy learning), they may not have to take any special classes for the GED. When I got mine to essentially "graduate" from high school in PA, I simply registered for the test, took it cold, and scored high enough to be awarded a high school diploma by the state. Don't know how other states do it, but it may be an option for your kids in the future. :)

If a high school senior has been educated adequately, no additional classes should be needed. I have tutored people to prep for the GED and it is a pretty basic test that the average high school sophomore should be able to pass.

[brandyc]

It's the worst thing that's ever happened to mine...

Fundamentalism is a sad system. It basically slaps Jesus' sacrifice in the face and says it wasn't good enough (my husband said that to me recently and it was a :idea: moment). I understand living to a certain moral code and doing that you think is "Christian", but when you lose your individuality and blend into a crowd of thoughtless robots who just spew out exactly what the person before them just said without rational thought as to WHY (which is the EVILLLLL question among fundies) then you've lost sight of it all. When I started asking WHY I felt the way I did instead of just basically copying and pasting others' thought and interpretations of things, (ESPECIALLY Biblically) my whole life changed, my whole faith changed.

I still get guilted in sometimes, but have a great group of friends and a wonderful man who grab me by my jean pockets and pull me back out. THEY know what is best for me because they honestly KNOW me. Sure, internet friends can be "real" friends but a majority of them are a pic and a few words on a profile.

I know you can find happiness and I wish you the best. Freedom is a good thing, and no matter what your so called fundie friends say, a true friend is happy for you no matter what and hangs with you, they don't ditch you because of petty things like a blog entry.

That's what started the whole journey for us when we were still in the Church of God Pentecostal church .... us starting to ask "why" ... ... and getting NO answers from those in authority in the church.

[brandyc]

Just stopped by FJ for a sec b/c being Friday the 13th and all, our hot water heater decided it was time to break... :evil: .I can live w/o many things, but hot water is not really one of them....Anyway, before the plumber gets here, just wanted to say "hi" to Brandy and say I'm glad you decided to stop by. I hope you stay around--you are welcome here. We haven't been easy on you but truly it's because we like you unlike some others (McKmama, etc).

I know you don't want to homeschool, but I was just wondering what the schools are like where you live and if the school bus comes by your house. Maybe if you went and just checked the school out, you might like it. Just an idea.

I recall that the zoo in Denver is pretty nice. Now it's been several years since we stopped by, but it is nice. Estes Park is also a lot of fun. I know the Colorado-ites tend to groan when I mention Estes Park, as they seem to think it's "touristy" or whatever, but we love it there.

Heh, I can't live without my hot water either lol. Heck, I get ticked when they're working on the well house here and we lose water for a few hours. Sucks. Hope your water gets fixed soon.

The bus runs here, yeah. I guess you could say it's about a city block away? It's at the beginning of the mobile home park.

I used to live in Colorado {Colorado Springs} .... real nice state. And since we don't live there, I'm all for touristy spots LOL! We'll keep Estes Park in mind when we head on down that way.

[brandyc]

This is what I mean about being more frustrated because I think you're a smart person. You don't come across as hateful and nasty, either, like so many of the fundie bloggers. (That I have read, anyway. If Brandy has gone on any rants about burning the witches or stoning the gay people, I will stand corrected.) When you're reading Harry Potter and getting interested in tea and talking about loving other people I find you likeable, even. The thing is, if someone knows better but doesn't put the things that they should into practice, then it has the same end result as someone who is too stupid to know that they're doing it wrong in the first place.

If you settle into liberal Christian mode and get your kids' education and socialization on the right track that will be awesome and hopefully good for your family. But really you could be calling us a den of vipers, telling your daughters that dating will make them slutty, and throwing books in the trash by this time next week, so it's hard for me to throw a party for you yet. That said, I truly hope that this latest change sticks, and that you improve things for your children and yourself. Time will tell.

I don't agree with certain lifestyle choices, but I don't recall ever going on a "burn the witches and stone the gays" sort of rant. I've got a few homosexual friends that I went to high school with, actually. And, nope, I don't go all "you're going to hell" on 'em either. :lol:

Everyone should be free to make their own life choices. :)

I get what you're saying and you're totally cool being a bit reserved in believing me or not. Completely understandable.

People do make stupid decisions though .... sometimes quite often, in our case ;) .... doesn't mean they don't eventually come to see truth when it's smacked 'em in the face. As you said, time will tell. And I'll expect a damn party. :lol:

[ilovetchotchkes]

That's what started the whole journey for us when we were still in the Church of God Pentecostal church .... us starting to ask "why" ... ... and getting NO answers from those in authority in the church.

This is what I'm hoping for you girl- that you be YOU like others have said- my doula is a Christian, for SURE she's a Christian. However, she's a hippie Christian - has dreads, eats vegan organic, dresses like someone out of Woodstock.... so if she can, you CAN be YOU and follow your faith. I think a lot of the problem is that with legalism, is that this fear that people hold, that they're WRONG so that if everyone is the same, and everyone in their family and church are the same, they can't possibly be wrong, and the lady in the corner with dreads and the tie dye skirt dancing to the same praise songs they are couldn't POSSIBLY be one of THEM. KWIM?

I had to leave Christianity entirely to find myself. And it was the hardest thing I've ever done but dude, it was the best thing I"ve ever done. Bar none, the best. I wish you luck on your journey.

[brandyc]

I'm not sure how it is for your state, but for some states, there is a test for highschool students to skip out of highschool and get the equivalent of a diploma. For example, the CHSPE in California.

One of the families we hang out with has a son who's about to graduate high school. I'm not entirely sure if she's got her facts straight or not {we're quite awhile away from high school yet}, but if I'm not mistaking, she said here they don't just go in and take a test. They've gotta take some courses like someone who dropped out of high school going back for a GED.

I'll be checking into that though.

[emilymea]

There are some many opportunities out there for homeschoolers - get your kids involved in something. They need it. Hanging out with a couple families is good, but there is so much more out there.

My mentor homeschools her kids. Her kids are in a co-op, church groups, sports, art classes designed for homeschoolers, etc. We don't live in a huge area and there is all that available for kids who homeschool. I'm a private tutor and she's already consulted me about what is best for her kids - looking into private tutoring services to help her kids succeed.

Go to a local bookstore/coffee shop and find someone tutoring a child near your child's age. Wait till they get done and talk to them about private lessons tailored to your child's interest if you feel unsure about teaching something. Trust me, good tutors will connect you with someone else if they can't help your specific case.

Homeschooling can be a wonderful thing, but the key is consistancy. Find out what works with your kids and do it for a long time. Work through the summers if you need to in order to get them "caught up." Make it hands on. Make it fun. Get help if you need it.

[Austin]

One of the families we hang out with has a son who's about to graduate high school. I'm not entirely sure if she's got her facts straight or not {we're quite awhile away from high school yet}, but if I'm not mistaking, she said here they don't just go in and take a test. They've gotta take some courses like someone who dropped out of high school going back for a GED.

I'll be checking into that though.

In my state, as long as you're 18 and the class you would have been in high school has graduated, you can sit for the GED. Many people who quit school several years prior may definitely benefit from some refresher/prep classes, or a GED tutor.

[brandyc]

Oh hey there, Brandy. Thanks for joining us. I was actually thinking about posting a comment on your blog, but since you're here, I'll do this instead.

First, a word of caution/advice from my observations: FJ is a pretty wide-open bunch, but calling of the bullshit will happen with speed and regularity. Important questions that are ignored will be repeated until they are answered in a clear manner, or the target of the question flounces. There are no free passes - and this is as it should be.

So, my comment - you know, if we encountered each other somewhere else in the world, we'd probably have a lot in common ... digging healthy food, beer drinking, into homeschooling (although I haven't decided if we are going that road yet), taking wisdom from the length and breadth of Christianity, yadda yadda. You seem like a genuinely nice person, with smart kids and a man who loves you, so kudos to that.

But here is where we part ways - you said in your comments on the ask me anything post that you would likely not allow your daughters to go to college. In fact, you even implied that the desire for higher education in a girl was something that had to be discerned as to whether or not it was "of God." And that just breaks my heart. I just don't get it. And no amount of Biblical citation salad will change that.

Your daughters deserve to be able to chart their future, even if it doesn't look like what you have chosen.

And finally, this:

If you're doing as excellent of a job homeschooling them as you seem to be (like I said, they sound like bright kids who enjoy learning), they may not have to take any special classes for the GED. When I got mine to essentially "graduate" from high school in PA, I simply registered for the test, took it cold, and scored high enough to be awarded a high school diploma by the state. Don't know how other states do it, but it may be an option for your kids in the future. :)

Like I said, I'm all for calling bullshit when calling bullshit is needed. And I'm trying my best to answer every question, as fast as their coming in, but my internet is rather slow .... and I do have a family here lol .... so a lil' patience is needed.

Not asking for a free pass, just some patience as I slowly get to everyone :)

When I opened up my blog to y'all, I did so with the thinking that a lot of us would actually get along if we could just understand each other a bit more. Then I got all into "ACK! Don't question me .... my way is better than yours" mode. Like I said, I was being a douchebag .... and, I believe I said this on my blog: I was saying things that I didn't know if I quite bought into myself.

"But here is where we part ways - you said in your comments on the ask me anything post that you would likely not allow your daughters to go to college. In fact, you even implied that the desire for higher education in a girl was something that had to be discerned as to whether or not it was "of God." And that just breaks my heart. I just don't get it. And no amount of Biblical citation salad will change that.

Your daughters deserve to be able to chart their future, even if it doesn't look like what you have chosen."

Yes, I actually agree. Jason and I talked about that at great length and, honestly, we wouldn't stop them if they wanted to go to college. As I've said before on the blog, Jason's actually considering going to college himself. ANd he's always been very supportive of me taking some classes if I wanted to. And I've thought about it.

"If you're doing as excellent of a job homeschooling them as you seem to be (like I said, they sound like bright kids who enjoy learning), they may not have to take any special classes for the GED. When I got mine to essentially "graduate" from high school in PA, I simply registered for the test, took it cold, and scored high enough to be awarded a high school diploma by the state. Don't know how other states do it, but it may be an option for your kids in the future."

I answered this in my above comment to someone else. I'm not entirely sure how exactly it works here .... and I've got some time before I need to be really concerned with it {only having an 8yo and 3yo} .... but it's something I definitely will be checking into. Regardless on if they have to take classes or just go take the test, I don't understand why so many homeschoolers are against getting their children a GED. If you've done your job educating them, it should be a piece of cake test. :)

[brandyc]

If a high school senior has been educated adequately, no additional classes should be needed. I have tutored people to prep for the GED and it is a pretty basic test that the average high school sophomore should be able to pass.

That was always my understanding too. But each state has different requirements and I just need to check into ours. :)

[brandyc]

This is what I'm hoping for you girl- that you be YOU like others have said- my doula is a Christian, for SURE she's a Christian. However, she's a hippie Christian - has dreads, eats vegan organic, dresses like someone out of Woodstock.... so if she can, you CAN be YOU and follow your faith. I think a lot of the problem is that with legalism, is that this fear that people hold, that they're WRONG so that if everyone is the same, and everyone in their family and church are the same, they can't possibly be wrong, and the lady in the corner with dreads and the tie dye skirt dancing to the same praise songs they are couldn't POSSIBLY be one of THEM. KWIM?

I had to leave Christianity entirely to find myself. And it was the hardest thing I've ever done but dude, it was the best thing I"ve ever done. Bar none, the best. I wish you luck on your journey.

I couldn't do vegan organic. Love my meat too much ROFL.

I know EXACTLY what you mean. Exactly. We have people trying to talk us out of dreads because "what will people think of you? What will people think of Jesus? People will judge based on your appearance and you'll be telling them you're some rhastafarian druggie or something looking like that/dressing like that!"

Or something along those lines.

Some people are gonna judge no matter WHAT you look like or how you dress though. We can't look like other people think we need to look though or we'll never be happy, dang it.

[brandyc]

There are some many opportunities out there for homeschoolers - get your kids involved in something. They need it. Hanging out with a couple families is good, but there is so much more out there.

My mentor homeschools her kids. Her kids are in a co-op, church groups, sports, art classes designed for homeschoolers, etc. We don't live in a huge area and there is all that available for kids who homeschool. I'm a private tutor and she's already consulted me about what is best for her kids - looking into private tutoring services to help her kids succeed.

Go to a local bookstore/coffee shop and find someone tutoring a child near your child's age. Wait till they get done and talk to them about private lessons tailored to your child's interest if you feel unsure about teaching something. Trust me, good tutors will connect you with someone else if they can't help your specific case.

Homeschooling can be a wonderful thing, but the key is consistancy. Find out what works with your kids and do it for a long time. Work through the summers if you need to in order to get them "caught up." Make it hands on. Make it fun. Get help if you need it.

I don't disagree with you at all. As I said, we're not nearly as social as we used to be. We've heard there's actually a lot of homeschoolers in this area. And we're looking forward to finding out where they are and getting to know them. We also want to get out there and volunteer more .... at the animal shelter up the road, at the nursing homes in town, etc. And, as I said, I'll be calling the leader of the local homeschooling group and talking to her about when they meet and where .... and also picking her brain to see if there's co-ops and such here locally.

Right now our oldest is just finishing up 3rd grade and I've been able to teach her everything just fine. However, I am weak in art and a couple other extras, so I'll definitely keep in mind your advice about talking to a tutor for some help. Absolutely!

I'm not opposed to asking for help when it's needed. Goodness knows I don't know everything lol

[Witsec7]

Hey I'm all for calling bullshit when calling bullshit is required. But you're not right here. Yes, my girls aren't as social as we once were. However, I've said several times that we do have a couple of families here in town that we've hung out with several times. I've said it here and I've said it in comment sections on my blog. Granted, that's not as social as we used to be .... but both of those families do have children {one family has 2 boys older than both my girls, the other family has a daughter a year or so younger than my oldest, a son about my youngest daughters age, and a new baby} and my girls have loved hanging out with them. They ask about them when they see Jason and I are on FB all the time.

Yup, I said we wouldn't associate with people who didn't think or believe like we did. Can I call my own bullshit for a moment? Cuz that's not true. Both of those families I mentioned are actually more conservative than Jason and I are in some areas. One of the families is a bit more "liberal" in certain areas though.

Yes, I do believe our faith is one of the most important things we can instill in them. However, I'm not entirely sure where you got the idea that my family brought me up in religion because I never said that. LOL. My dad read us stories from the Bible as bedtime stories for a couple of years, yeah. We had a crucifix hanging up in our house, yeah. But we were not Christians at all. My dad thinks Jesus is a good teacher with good moral lessons, but that's it. My sister isn't sure she believes in a god at all. My mother is open to Christianity, but not a Christian. My parents are into horoscopes, tarot cards, and all that jazz. They always have been. I've never seen them step into a Church .... well, except for a couple of weddings.

Jason's family are the ones who are Christians. They're what some would call "liberal Christians" .... and they've NEVER agreed with our ways when we were on the more conservative flip of the flip-flopping. They raised him differently than that.

Except for our times when we cut out family, we didn't isolate our children from either side of the family at all. They all talked on the phone as often as we could.

And, as you probably know, we lived with Jason's family a couple of times. So our oldest was definitely exposed to lots of different ways of living .... via his family AND all their friends. And, again as you probably know, we lived with my dad for awhile. So they were definitely exposed to a way of life without any sort of religion via him. :)

Like I said, we were more social in the past than we've been the past 3yrs or so.

Yes, I spoke in the future. Heck, tomorrow is the future ... so I don't think talking about stuff in the future is bad. :)

As I've said, we've been making intentional changes for the better here. Cut me just a bit of slack and give me just a bit of time to get it going, alright? ;)

I don't keep pet fundies, and I don't cut fundies any slack. I personally think you are a hot mess and need some help, and I'd like to see you get it before you get pregnant again. The crap you told your daughter about sex was vomit producing for many here. You need to get off the fucking internets, call community services and see what kind of assistance is out there. If you are unwilling to work outside of the home, find something to do volunteer wise in town. And quit being so friggin concerned that you're gonna run into or have contact with some ebil heathen. Thats life in the real world. Deal with it.

FWIW seeing peoples pictures on facebook isn't socialization. Your girls are how old now? And they've been isolated for 3 years? You've lived in a community for 3 years, and I'm guessing there isn't a person in town that you can count on for some respite care, or a ride to the library.

How many playdates did your girls have since March? When was the last time they went to story book hour at the library? Did they get to go to town for Xmas and see the any holiday programs at the schools or churches in town? Did you take them to the parks last summer or enroll them in any summer play programs? Internet 'friends' can't give you a ride to town can they Brandy?

I've been following your different incarnations for years, you always have the best of intentions when you do another switcheroo.

riffles and format

[formerlyfundie]

We have people trying to talk us out of dreads because "what will people think of you? What will people think of Jesus? People will judge based on your appearance and you'll be telling them you're some rhastafarian druggie or something looking like that/dressing like that!"

Whoever these "people" are are clearly idiots, Jesus isn't some clean cut fundie in a suit passing out tracts to people on the street. Ugh.

My husband always says it to me like this, "God isn't some stuffy old man sitting in Heaven waiting on you to mess up and excited to smite you if your clothes, hair, etc aren't "right". Jesus wasn't perfect either, he was offensive, he was controversial, but most of all was a MAN."

All of these little rules and image things fundies rely on show a huge lack of compassion for God sacrificing His son and a lack of understanding of grace. Grace isn't a key to the door of sin, it is a gift given to us so that we, as imperfect as we are, could one day reach Heaven because God WANTS US THERE. If He wanted us to sit around and condemn one another for being unique and being the creations that HE made, it makes no sense for Him to have sent Jesus.

I'm so passionate about this for you because I am also speaking to myself. Be you, be free, let the haters hate and continue to spread that hate because God has nothing to do with HATE, and be unafraid to be happy and enjoy life. The only image you should want to copy is that of a confident, happy, faithful woman and Mom- and there is NO set standard for that.

[Guest Anonymous]

I don't agree with certain lifestyle choices, but I don't recall ever going on a "burn the witches and stone the gays" sort of rant. I've got a few homosexual friends that I went to high school with, actually. And, nope, I don't go all "you're going to hell" on 'em either. :lol:

Everyone should be free to make their own life choices. :)

I get what you're saying and you're totally cool being a bit reserved in believing me or not. Completely understandable.

People do make stupid decisions though .... sometimes quite often, in our case ;) .... doesn't mean they don't eventually come to see truth when it's smacked 'em in the face. As you said, time will tell. And I'll expect a damn party. :lol:

Being gay is not "a lifestyle choice." That's a hurtful thing to say, really. What age were you when you chose to be straight?

I think this is an issue that you should really look at and study, because it seems you have some lingering fundie attitudes in regards to this one.