Katie & Travis 3: Married and Expecting to be Expecting Soon….

[front hugs > duggs]

Katie posted on her Instagram stories about how she burnt/singed some of her hair being too close to a fireplace (ironic timing considering the recent deadly space heater fire). Travis helps her with cutting her burnt hair off, and ends up taking too much hair off in trying to make everything even (super relatable - at home haircuts during quarantine anyone?).

It was a very candid, moment where (IMO) you see her true personality. And (again, IMO) she is a Carlin clone.

[theotherelise]

Julia Roberts' character in Runaway Bride didn't know how she actually preferred her eggs because she always adopted whatever preference her partner had. That's what I think of with Katie. Josie was the one interested in hair, but Katie went along with her. Travis' family breeds a certain dog and so Katie loves that kind of dog. She has jumped from one weird koolaid bath to a different flavor of koolaid bath with the Clarks. And at the end of the day I don't think she has any idea what she likes even superficially.

All the other adult Bates daughters seem to have fairly unique styles of appearance and fashion and home décor, at least to the extent allowed within their accepted parameters. But Katie just kind of morphs into whatever she is closest to. Her wardrobe now looks exactly like her sisters in law. I know it's all superficial, but there are so few means of expression for fundie women and I'm honestly a little sad about how much Katie is just assimilating when she never really even found herself to begin with.

While their beliefs are misogynistic and regressive, I at least appreciated with Michael Staddon and Elizabeth Frazer that Elizabeth seems to be loved for who she is and not how she will mold into something else. It's so creepy when the patriarchal headship requires a specific look, not just specific rules, ya know?

[SorenaJ]

I watched the video where they decorate their Christmas tree. Katie comes off as incredibly annoying. She is so dramatic and over the top. 

[Melissa1977]

10 hours ago, theotherelise said:

Julia Roberts' character in Runaway Bride didn't know how she actually preferred her eggs because she always adopted whatever preference her partner had. That's what I think of with Katie. Josie was the one interested in hair, but Katie went along with her. Travis' family breeds a certain dog and so Katie loves that kind of dog. She has jumped from one weird koolaid bath to a different flavor of koolaid bath with the Clarks. And at the end of the day I don't think she has any idea what she likes even superficially.

All the other adult Bates daughters seem to have fairly unique styles of appearance and fashion and home décor, at least to the extent allowed within their accepted parameters. But Katie just kind of morphs into whatever she is closest to. Her wardrobe now looks exactly like her sisters in law. I know it's all superficial, but there are so few means of expression for fundie women and I'm honestly a little sad about how much Katie is just assimilating when she never really even found herself to begin with.

While their beliefs are misogynistic and regressive, I at least appreciated with Michael Staddon and Elizabeth Frazer that Elizabeth seems to be loved for who she is and not how she will mold into something else. It's so creepy when the patriarchal headship requires a specific look, not just specific rules, ya know?

Years ago, the blog showed a young Katie as an avid reader. She seemed to be a good student too (well... at least for Bates Homeschool Academy) and she was an active and funny child. But her parents banned sports, banned her nurse career, pushed her to focus in her looks and marry young etc. She has no personality...because it has been erased. 

[CanadianMamam]

Travis and Katie did another YouTube video and Travis arguing that they had been married "a month because it had been 4 weeks since the wedding" (this was on the 31st) is all you need to know about the quality of education at the Clark's school. 

[llucie]

It was nice to see Addee and Ellie getting to do fun activities with a sister for once instead of babysitting. They better enjoy it while it lasts.

Katies seems really homesick, she said it feels like an eternity since she left home instead of one month and cried while speaking to her dad on the phone to congratule him on his birthday.

Edited January 13, 2022 by llucie
spelling

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 minutes ago, llucie said:

It was nice to see Addee and Ellie getting to do fun activities with a sister for once instead of babysitting. They better enjoy it while it lasts.

Katies seems really homesick, she said it feels like an eternity since she left home instead of one month and cried while speaking to her dad on the phone to congratule him on his birthday.

I bet that instead of questioning themselves and beliefs that young marriage is good, they will just tell themselves Katie will be fine And eventually get used to it. Michaela also seemed to really miss her family when they lived in Illinois. Brandon moved to Tennessee for her but I doubt Travis will move to Tennessee for Katie. His family seems to have total control and will make sure their three kids stay in their area. 

[Fundielandobserver]

2 hours ago, llucie said:

It was nice to see Addee and Ellie getting to do fun activities with a sister for once instead of babysitting. They better enjoy it while it lasts.

 

Saw Katie's youtube video ....It was a stark difference from Alyssa's stories where they just stayed in and cleaned ,babysat( for her datenite) packed christmas deco . Katie had a lot of fun activities for her sisters that was nice!

[HideousGreenShirt]

And now her brother Jackson is visiting. She said her best friend is flying in soon too. This is such a sad marriage already.

Who thinks these two will conceive this year? I hope they wait like JinJer until Katie is ready and actually settled in NJ.

What is Travis going to do for work? 

[JermajestyDuggar]

24 minutes ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

And now her brother Jackson is visiting. She said her best friend is flying in soon too. This is such a sad marriage already.

Who thinks these two will conceive this year? I hope they wait like JinJer until Katie is ready and actually settled in NJ.

What is Travis going to do for work? 

Like I said before, I think Travis’s parents still have a hold on him. If his parents are okay with some sort of NFP, I think they will wait a year before getting pregnant. 

[Smash!]

3 hours ago, llucie said:

Katies seems really homesick, she said it feels like an eternity since she left home instead of one month and cried while speaking to her dad on the phone to congratule him on his birthday.

In a normal world Katie could have decided she wanted to live near her family. Travis and her would have eventually broken up because they couldn‘t agree to where to live. She would have married someone who was okay living in that part of Tennessee. 

Instead she was expected to move to her husbands place and get used to it. Fundamentalism is so cruel to the females.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Yet another problem with fundies. There is a high number of long distance relationships. I was in a semi long distance relationship and I personally don’t recommend them for young people. It’s just too hard. You rarely ever spend long amounts of time together. It’s always just planning the next time you see them. And when you do see them, you keep thinking about how they will leave soon. It’s a huge roller coaster of emotions added to an already emotional time. Then fundies are always faced with the decision of where to live. Of course men rule so what they say goes. I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s why a lot of fundie couples break up. Because the girl has to live where her husband says. So the only way she can avoid that is breaking up. Fundies who think just like you are few and far between. So that means it’s likely you’ll do a long distance relationship. It’s just a shitty situation to put your kids in. 

[CanadianMamam]

1 hour ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

And now her brother Jackson is visiting. She said her best friend is flying in soon too. This is such a sad marriage already.

Who thinks these two will conceive this year? I hope they wait like JinJer until Katie is ready and actually settled in NJ.

What is Travis going to do for work? 

Jackson is in the area for work, with his boss and they just met up for dinner. 

[SassyPants]

41 minutes ago, Smash! said:

In a normal world Katie could have decided she wanted to live near her family. Travis and her would have eventually broken up because they couldn‘t agree to where to live. She would have married someone who was okay living in that part of Tennessee. 

Instead she was expected to move to her husbands place and get used to it. Fundamentalism is so cruel to the females.

And the only approved activity to fill her time is baby after baby. This is so cruel, I agree.

[irish_dancing_canadian]

I watched their most recent Youtube video and I am glad Katie got to spend time with her sisters (and I can't believe how much they have grown). She seems really hands on with them and the activities they did looked fun. Hope Katie will be this involved with her future children. I know every one keeps saying this but it is way too obvious that Travis and Katie are not ready for marriage. 

[lizzybee]

I stream the Bates' church sometimes and this weekend Gil was asking the congregation to pray for Katie because she's so homesick and that she wanted him to tell them all that she really misses them so much. Add me to the group that she was too young to ask to leave her family and live far away. Before she got married she was ALWAYS with one her sisters. To go from always with your family to never seeing them, while married to someone who isn't much more than a stranger in a lot of ways can't be a good type of shock to the system. I felt sick to my stomach watching her cry facetiming her dad on his birthday. I went to college an hour and a half away when I was 18 and was so homesick I drove home every single weekend and transferred the next year to somewhere closer. I can't imagine being permanently 10 hours away that young and not wanting to be. 

[Mrs Ms]

I have no clue if Katie and Travis would have been too young to marry in the real world. But in the fundie world? Clearly yes!
In the real world they would have spent time alone together, made decisions about where to live together and she would have been free to work or study.

But no. No alone time until marriage, move to where it suits the husband and work or study IF the husband wants the wife to. And put a smile on that face because “testimony” 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I think growing up with divorced parents who had 50/50 custody really helped with any possible home sickness at college. I was so used to waking up at a different house all the time. I loved having sleepovers at a young age. I was never the kid who asked to go home at 11pm at sleepovers. I was the kid who didn’t want to leave the next day! Yes, I can be a homebody. But I could be a homebody in a dorm too. So although I was a little homesick at first when I went to college, it wasn’t overwhelming. I never cried over it and I hardly ever went home since it was a 3.5 hour drive. So I guess there’s one good thing about having divorced parents 😉

[Bluebirdbluebell]

Trigger Warning! Abuse of child/adult child!

Second Trigger Warning! Abuse of teenager

Travis's parents posted videos of his older male relatives wishing Travis a Happy Birthday! 

Spoiler

In the first video, Travis and his granddad try to hit each other with belts. His grandfather doesn't seem all that old (50s or 60s).  Granddad looks healthy and fit and young enough to be an active participant and not just an old guy badgered into this. 

Spoiler

This is the link for Reddit where you can see the video. Please don't click the link if that sounds triggering. 

The second video:

Spoiler

The second video shows Travis wrestling with his dad. It might sound fun, but Travis complains about it being physically painful. Travis's dad says "Are you big enough to beat your dad? No, sir. Remember that. God is big enough, but you ain't."

Quote

Here is the link for the reddit thread for that video. The video is in that thread. Those that might be triggered please don't look!

 

I think the Bates are pretty horrible, but now I'm concerned about the family of monsters Katie married into! Run Katie Run!

[RosyDaisy]

WTF did I just watch?  What kind of fundie shit is this?

[Marly]

wtf did I just watch??? How do they think this is normal behavior?
For me it's mainly the first video that is really wtf, see spoiler. Second is weird because of what the dad says, and weird if he really hurts Travis.
My dad is a martial arts instructor, and he used to practice moves with my brother when my brother was in his teens (16 and up), but as soon as my brother would say "ouch" or "you're hurting me now", my dad would stop/back away immediately, and if my brother was up for it try again but with less force. But it was always in a clear practice setting. And when they would play-fight and someone got hurt, the party that inflicted the hurt always apologized and definitely did not try to reinforce the notion that they were the more powerful one.
Like, wtf? Why does the dad feel the need to show his who's boss in this way? This is so weird. And honestly, if that was my FIL doing that to my spouse, I would get really upset. And the inlaws wouldn't be seeing us for a long time.  
 

Spoiler

Especially when his grandpa grabs him around the throat and throws him on the couch. That was really nasty. That straight up looked like an abusive move. That's not what you do in normal play-fighting. Wtf???? How do they think this is normal???

 

Edited January 25, 2022 by Marly

[formergothardite]

That is insane even for fundies. I am very worried for any children born to Katie and Travis. The father and grandfather seem to delight in hurting and humiliating Travis. 

[Bluebirdbluebell]

20 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

That is insane even for fundies. I am very worried for any children born to Katie and Travis. The father and grandfather seem to delight in hurting and humiliating Travis. 

And they're young for father and grandfather. They'll be around for a while.

[JermajestyDuggar]

I’ve been worried for Katie because the parents seem to have control over the 3 adult kids. It’s scary when there’s so much control that all three children have the exact same type of no touch courtship, the same engagement, and I think they all still live in the area as well. If you create your own church and college that all your kids go to, you probably want to control your great grandkids too. Katie’s children will be Clarks not Bateses. Poor kids. I always hope for boys to be born but now I’m hoping they are girls. They might avoid the beatings that they pretend are fun.

Edited January 25, 2022 by JermajestyDuggar

[Keys]

Wtf?! That was seriously disturbing and so wrong.