JinJer & Felicity 44: The Glossy Veneer is Slipping

[VanillaBean]

I admit it--I saw her without mittens,  and I counted her fingers.  Anyone else?

[SapphireSlytherin]

Nah. I had already counted her fingers when they posted her newborn pic, sans mittens.  

[elliha]

I hate to say it but Felicity is my favorite Duggar baby, she beats Spurgeon. She is really cute! (And yes, they are all awful)

[AtlanticTug]

2 hours ago, elliha said:

I hate to say it but Felicity is my favorite Duggar baby, she beats Spurgeon. She is really cute! (And yes, they are all awful)

It's funny because I find her to be one of the least cute Duggar babies so far...

[Lurky]

These two are the dangerous Duggars.  Jinger is the polar opposites of Jill when it comes to social media, and whoever they have on hand to take the coupley photos is great at it.

If I saw those pics of Jeremy cuddling his daughter out of nowhere, I'd think it was adorable.  But how typical that he's captioning his own picture with a self-aggrandising caption like "her happy place" rather than how it makes him feel - or how much she loves being held by her mum? 

And some how seeing these pretty, well-crafted photos just makes it feel worse that in their cult their daughter has only one purpose in life - to become a submissive wife and mother.  I really, really hope that all this generation of Duggars get to go to school, and have a better education and more chances than their parents, but I especially feel for the little girls, who are destined to be sister moms and brood mares, unless they get to escape.  I would hope that as Jeremy's sister and mother are educated, he'll want that for his own daughter, but I suspect it's going to be Jinger repeating the pattern of SOTDRT, only without even Michelle's educational advantages.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

27 minutes ago, Lurky said:

only without even Michelle's educational advantages.

That is a very sobering thought.

[byzant]

On 9/21/2018 at 5:39 AM, just_ordinary said:

 

I would love to know how they process their actions with their wife’s past. I would even more love to know how Jill and Jinger think and feel about their past, if they really talked about it with their husbands, if they have been able to brush it off or if their husbands actions hurt them? I think maybe non of those four even makes the connection that we do. It is a common pattern that they see their own problems as valid but others in the exact same spot are treated as if they are just whiny.

 

Given their beliefs about purity I would guess it's never discussed because it's a reminder their wives are'inpure' there is some good work going on by survivors  of csa about the damage purity culture does .For example rape survivors and the sticky tape example.  

[farmerannie]

13 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

That was me.

For the record, I don’t have an issue with Jinger being arm candy if that’s what she truly wants. I do have an issue with it if she feels pressured (by anyone) to look or act a certain way and I definitely take issue with her parents raising her to think she should be a submissive helpmeet.

What really concerns me though is how this could impact their parenting and how Felicity is raised. I feel very badly for everything Jinger was put through growing up and that won’t ever change, but Jinger is also now in a position of power over an innocent child. She, like her other siblings with children, is at the point in life where she could potentially* become both victim and abuser**. I feel strongly that Felicity and all the other Duggar grandchildren deserve better than their parents got when they were growing up. I hope Jinger and Jeremy (and the others) do right by their daughter and any other children they may have, but I’m also not going to be surprised if they don’t. 

*Potentially is starred, bolded, and underlined so no one mistakenly accuses me of saying this is guaranteed to happen. It’s not. The possibility is there though and I think we should be prepared for that possibility, no matter how slim it may be. 

**And abuser is starred as well because I’m specifically thinking of how her parents abused her by forcing her to be a Sister Mom and by limiting her opportunities in life. Again, I want to be clear so no one accuses me of implying anything I would never suggest. 

I think it’s possible for most people to change, though I also think some people won’t want to put in the time and effort to do so. It’ll be interesting to see which - if any - of the Duggar and Bates kids will be willing and able to put in that time and effort to change their own beliefs and ways of thinking. 

And I give you a lot of credit for being strong enough and brave enough to re-examine your own beliefs. From what I know (and based off my very limited experience) it can be a very difficult process. I think you did your children and yourself a world of good by doing so though and you should be proud of yourself. Not everyone is able to confront their beliefs like you did. 

It isn't an easy process. I grew up in a very religious house hold and was taught that certain things were fact. Although I will give my grandparents credit in the sense that they were very loving and kind and education was a priority in our house. My mistake was marrying the first boy I dated and having kids at a young age. Then I proceeded to teach my children those same beliefs and believing that my husband had all control over me. It took me until I was 30 to look at things and realize this is  not ok and me and my girls are not property. My children have come out of it against all odds and are amazing humans. So I did a little something right by always fighting for them.

[VeryNikeSeamstress]

I don't remember Jinger's hair being that responsive to the sun. I've noticed some lighter streaks recently, but it looks really light in this most recent picture.

Felicity's facial expressions are really cute.

[Sky with diamonds]

14 hours ago, formergothardite said:

Use a cute baby to make people forget that they just admitted to believing horrific things. That poor baby will be raised in a household teaching her that hate is normal. 

Leg humpers might just forget or gloss over their ugly beliefs. I'm thankful that not everyone does, including most of us who currently post here.

Felicity is a cute baby. I was hoping her birth and her being here would have made Jinger and Jeremy see or have  sense about equality. I'm sad but not surprised it hasn't happened...maybe one day it will.

[Jinder Roles]

55 minutes ago, VeryNikeSeamstress said:

I don't remember Jinger's hair being that responsive to the sun. I've noticed some lighter streaks recently, but it looks really light in this most recent picture.

Felicity's facial expressions are really cute.

Those are most probably highlights. She’s had them since she was pregnant (they look retouched) 

[miss_batson]

It seems some od the Duggar boys visiting Jinger.

Spoiler

https://www.instagram.com/p/BoK2wMxgSWe/?utm_source=ig_share_sheet&igshid=10rc1j0oe5j6f

 

[PuttingTheFunInFundies]

2 hours ago, miss_batson said:

It seems some od the Duggar boys visiting Jinger.

  Hide contents

https://www.instagram.com/p/BoK2wMxgSWe/?utm_source=ig_share_sheet&igshid=10rc1j0oe5j6f

 

Who's the boy between Jinger and Jed?

[miss_batson]

9 minutes ago, PuttingTheFunInFundies said:

Who's the boy between Jinger and Jed?

James?

[Chewing Gum]

Yeah that’s James. Him and Jed are meeting Lissy for the first time, or so her insta tells us. Nothing weird about that. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

1 hour ago, PuttingTheFunInFundies said:

Who's the boy between Jinger and Jed?

I thought that was Josiah. lol

And they are BUYING NEW!!! omg

[VBOY9977]

The boy is not a Duggar. I think it’s David Swanson.

[PuttingTheFunInFundies]

59 minutes ago, Chewing Gum said:

Yeah that’s James. Him and Jed are meeting Lissy for the first time, or so her insta tells us. Nothing weird about that. 

Yeah, but...James is the one on the right. Who's that kid in the background?

[Pecansforeveryone]

21 hours ago, formergothardite said:

Use a cute baby to make people forget that they just admitted to believing horrific things. That poor baby will be raised in a household teaching her that hate is normal. 

They will start by teaching her to hate herself. I found the doctrine of original sin to be an incredibly damaging, abusive doctrine. Teaching a young child that they are a hopelessly, corrupt, soul born wicked from the day of their birth is crushing. Adding to that the guilt of a completely, innocent man having to suffer and die the most excruciating of deaths because you snuck cookies as a child and pulled your sister's hair. That's a set up for a never ending cycle of guilt and shame. 

[formergothardite]

15 minutes ago, Pecansforeveryone said:

They will start by teaching her to hate herself. I found the doctrine of original sin to be an incredibly damaging, abusive doctrine. Teaching a young child that they are a hopelessly, corrupt, soul born wicked from the day of their birth is crushing. Adding to that the guilt of a completely, innocent man having to suffer and die the most excruciating of deaths because you snuck cookies as a child and pulled your sister's hair. That's a set up for a never ending cycle of guilt and shame. 

Oh yeah. When I talked to my therapists about my childhood and how some of the first things I remember was being told that I was born sinful, worthy of hell, and that Jesus had to suffer a terrible death to save me so I better follow him and be grateful because I don't deserve anything but death and damnation, she said my various mental health issues really weren't surprising. That wasn't IBLP teachings, that was just your typical, you are born sinful and need Jesus teachings. I can't imagine teaching that to my children. 

[Pecansforeveryone]

Oh yeah, original sin is a core doctrine of Christianity going back millenia. The whole "warm and fuzzy Jesus is your best friend" brand of Christianity is mostly product of the re-branding of the last 30-40 years. My parents were never involved in IBLP. I have a bachelors in psychology from a State university. Original sin was happily preached by the various Christian ministries at this State university. 

[Mama Mia]

49 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

Oh yeah. When I talked to my therapists about my childhood and how some of the first things I remember was being told that I was born sinful, worthy of hell, and that Jesus had to suffer a terrible death to save me so I better follow him and be grateful because I don't deserve anything but death and damnation, she said my various mental health issues really weren't surprising. That wasn't IBLP teachings, that was just your typical, you are born sinful and need Jesus teachings. I can't imagine teaching that to my children. 

Awful. What a horrible thing to lay on children!

My impression as a little kid from my church 50 years ago - was “everyone is sinful” = “everyone makes mistakes” -and  God loves everyone . And then the Golden Rule - which basically = be kind. 

My favorite church song I can’t find - but the lyrics went something like “ I am a child of the light, I radiate. Peace and love surround me as I walk through the valley of light.” . There was only one mention of the Devil or Hell that I recall - and it was in a really silly song that had a refrain of “ if the Devil doesn’t like it he can sit on some tacks!” that we all giggled at. 

There were also crafts. It was a very nurturing, warm experience. 

 

[Chewing Gum]

1 hour ago, PuttingTheFunInFundies said:

Yeah, but...James is the one on the right. Who's that kid in the background?

Ah I didn’t read properly. No idea! 

[PennySycamore]

@Mama Mia, the lyrics to that song about the devil sitting on tacks is something like this:*

I've got that joy, joy, joy down in my heart

(where?) Down in my heart.

(where) Down in my heart

I've got that joy, joy, joy down in my heart to stay.

 

And if the Devil doesn't like he can sit on a tack

(what?) Sit on a tack

(what?) Sit on a tack

And if the Devil doesn't like it he can sit on tack to stay.

 

*That's the best I can remember it.  I probably learned the first verse in Sunbeams almost 60 years ago, but the second much, much later.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

@PennySycamore I would give you the f- you button but don't want to really down vote you, I'm now going to have this song stuck in my head all day.   

Sadly not the worst song stuck in there this week.