Lori Alexander 44: Ken Galloping Off on the Horse of Truth The Feminists Are Coming!

[Frog99]

@Loveday that post made me so sad. I sometimes wonder if the need for mentoring and teaching these women constantly cite a need for is simply a need to connect to someone, because they have no ability to relate to anyone with more than a limited and narrow view of life. 

Then there’s the comment from the woman whose daughters find the idea of staying home boring, and are excited by their father’s job. I looked at her profile and those girls are young. I’m sad for them because their curiosity and intellect and creativity will be stifled. 

There is a family at our church with three kiddos- 2 school age and a 2 year old. They have home schooled then public schooled and now plan to homeschool again (the oldest is only in 1st grade). The oldest is spunky and social and outgoing, and it makes me sad for her- her education will be impacted as will her socialization needs. They are homeschooling to avoid exposure to things they don’t agree with. 

To clarify- I am not against homeschooling at all. One of best interns I ever had- able to think critically, managed time well, had excellent judgment, and had great ability to relate to others- was homeschooled through grade 12. It can be done well. 

@onemama I love your comment. I’ve read Ken’s response three times and it doesn’t make any sense to me. His presentation makes me question his success. 

[polecat]

1 hour ago, delphinium65 said:

Among other things he says 'God also is the one who gave Lori her personality...'  Should get a refund, or exchange, on that gift. 

Oh no, don't blame God for that monstrosity ...

[delphinium65]

2 minutes ago, polecat said:

Oh no, don't blame God for that monstrosity ...

Right.  I stand (sit) corrected!    The Bible says 'Every good and perfect gift is from above,' doesn't say those gifts will remain perfect.  It must have taken a lot of twisting and mangling to trash that one so thoroughly.   

[polecat]

1 hour ago, Curious said:

 

 

wow up to a 7 on the pain scale.  While that is nothing to sneeze at, I lived for about 7 years at a constant 8-9 with no pain control.  I couldn't watch a comedy movie because laughing hurt so much and sent my back into muscle spasms.

I can (and do) tell people exactly why I have pain.  Not some vague "illness."  My problems are also consistent, they don't just crop up when someone else is the center of attention (like my child's wedding, for example).

There are people who have chronic pain that go to their jobs every day.  They take care of their kids or maybe elderly parents, every day.  They do housework, every day.  They don't have the luxury of laying around in bed or having a "ministry"

Sorry to break it to you, Ken, but Lori is not special because she has chronic pain of some dubious nature.

(note: this is how far I got into Ken's post before I tapped out)

As a fellow chronic pain sufferer, yeah. 

Chronic migraines here as well as a disorder that causes pain in subcutaneous tissue. If my brain isn't hurting, the rest of my body does. And anything between 4-7 is pretty much a normal day. I have to work, take care of my kids, take care of my house, etc. Sometimes things just don't get done if the pain is really bad (like an 8 or 9) -- if the house gets trashed so that I have the energy to go to my kid's drama production, then that's what's going to happen. So be it.

In normal situations, I'd never begrudge a fellow pain sufferer the "luxury" of lying down and preserving their precious energy. You do what you've got to do. But in Lori's case, I find all of her stories suspect. As you said, that pain sure does crop up conveniently when it's time for someone else to be the center of attention. 

And see, that's another thing that strikes me as off: Most people I know with chronic pain go to an awful lot of effort to "fake well," which we do so that our health doesn't become the central topic of conversation or other people's concerns. Not Lori, oh hell no -- she feeds off that shit. 

[polecat]

25 minutes ago, delphinium65 said:

Right.  I stand (sit) corrected!    The Bible says 'Every good and perfect gift is from above,' doesn't say those gifts will remain perfect.  It must have taken a lot of twisting and mangling to trash that one so thoroughly.   

Oh, lol, I wasn't being terse with you but with KEN. He has some audacity. First saying Jesus was wrong way back when, and now blaming God for Lori's nastiness? Oh heck no.

[delphinium65]

1 minute ago, polecat said:

Oh, lol, I wasn't being terse with you but with KEN. He has some audacity. First saying Jesus was wrong way back when, and now blaming God for Lori's nastiness? Oh heck no.

I didn't think for a second that you were.   I knew it was aimed at Ken.  In fact my second thought, after 'you really need to return that gift' was 'oh, hell no!  Don't blame God for Lori's bullshit, that's all her!'  

[Sarah92]

Ken continues to remind of a stereotypical used car salesman. Also if they didn't care they wouldn't feel the need to defend so much or go on 2.0 and FJ. 

And the thing about writing is, if it's that easy to supposedly misinterpret what you're writing (I.e Ken's molestation comment which btw I don't think was taken out of context like he complains) then you need to improve your writing. If it's not clear then you as the writer are at fault. Maybe take a class? Actually utilize that education?

 I'm pretty good at BSing, it's how I made it through in class debates in HS when I didn't prepare. That combined with a serious presence and an analytical attitude made me pretty believable. I know, I know women shouldn't have an analytical mind but God blessed me with this personality, right Ken? Just like Lori? But it makes it easier to pick through the BS others spew and honestly Ken isn't as good at using word salad as he thinks he is; he's not as bad as Trump but not great. 

P.s. Despite being pretty good at BSing I value honesty and integrity and only use my powers in certain situations lol. 

[littlemommy]

Oof, that took a lot of paragraphs to say “FJ, we will never see eye to eye, but we’re in the right, and if you don’t agree you just hate God.—Ken”

[refugee]

11 hours ago, Sarah92 said:

Except for she's using that verse out of context as the passage specifically refers to widows, referencing children taking care of their aging parents. Further down it mentions young women taking care of widows already in their care. This seems to note that it's a collaborative effort within the church. Wealthy widows were expect to pay for their own care it would seem. Young widows could remarry. The point seems to be not to drain funds away from those who could truly use them. Funnily enough outside of this passage I don't think men providing is ever mentioned again, although you see both genders doing so in different ways. 

On that note someone with a Greek understanding might be better at interpreting the use of masculine pronouns in this particular passage. 

Also didnt LoriKen say you can't create an entire theology out of one verse? Hmmmm

I can play that game, too! That verse says nothing that prohibits a wife from working; it simply prohibits a man from being a lazy slob living off his wife’s income.

There. All fixed. Lori style, of course.

(look at a verse, “meditate” on the word, figure out how to prove it says what I think it should say. Voila.)

[SuperNova]

Spoiler

The painting chosen for today's post sets the tone for me. If this doesn't scream superior man thinking, I don't know what does. A lone, virile male perched above it all on a precipice. Ken is here, girls, and he's preachin' gods truths. The arrogance is astounding to behold.

He uses the phrase "finding common ground" several times. No, Ken. Common ground isn't what your looking for. You want compliance and argeement. It's very transparent by the overall tone. I can see him just shaking his head at us poor mislead women. According to Ken, without common ground we are blinded to god's ways. 

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"If our circles of understanding do not intersect, it is because we stand by God’s Word as fully inspired by God and all that is within it is is the gift of wisdom God has given His church to show us how we are to live our lives before Him."

I understand what Ken and Lori are saying. I clearly understand their belief system. That is why we can't have common ground. I cannot prescribe to an ideology that promotes submission based solely on what sits between our legs.

Quote

"Knowledge and belief systems go hand in hand and cannot be separated. Many nonchristians falsely believe that they have no belief system, but that is not true. Their belief system may not be as well formulated as is Christianity, but a belief that there are no valid religions is in itself a religion of humanism and self-worship as it exaults one’s mind above the mind of God."

I found this paragraph particularly interesting as I am an atheist. It is a Christian understanding of what it means to be godless. I do not exalt myself as godlike, I do not self worship, I am unable to put myself above the mind of god because no such diety exists for me. I do have a belief system that's incredibly simple. Do no harm. That's it. 

The worst part about Ken's entire post is that it is abundantly clear that they feel that this is all very personal. And I guess for them it is. For me, it's a concept, an idea that weak minded people can be drawn to. Its dangerous and I don't care who's on the other end. Lori, Ken, or someone else entirely. I'm opposed to their views. They are so deeply entrenched in their single prism view and narcissism that they believe this is a personal attack. Pathetic.

 

 

Can an admin please put my quotes in boxes? Eta, thank you curious. Sometimes I no computer so good.

[usmcmom]

I've always wondered why none of Lori's "success stories" have commented on her blog or Facebook page. I've never seen a a comment that reads "Lori saved my marriage. I am so thankful she taught me.....(fill in the blank)."

Also, I think the church story is fake. I doubt Lori has ever actually pointed to a woman and whispered to Ken "I saved her marriage;" and then that woman whispered in her ear after services. In fact, I hope it is a lie because Lori should not be pointing out to Ken the women she mentors; at least not in a public place where others can overhear. She clearly cannot keep things to herself; so, if she DOES have a record of saving marriages, she would have made sure the whole congregation knew about it. 

Where are the satisfied customers who could easily defend Lori?  She even has an Amazon page on which they could comment, but...nothing. 

[Curious]

5 hours ago, polecat said:

As a fellow chronic pain sufferer, yeah. 

Chronic migraines here as well as a disorder that causes pain in subcutaneous tissue. If my brain isn't hurting, the rest of my body does. And anything between 4-7 is pretty much a normal day. I have to work, take care of my kids, take care of my house, etc. Sometimes things just don't get done if the pain is really bad (like an 8 or 9) -- if the house gets trashed so that I have the energy to go to my kid's drama production, then that's what's going to happen. So be it.

In normal situations, I'd never begrudge a fellow pain sufferer the "luxury" of lying down and preserving their precious energy. You do what you've got to do. But in Lori's case, I find all of her stories suspect. As you said, that pain sure does crop up conveniently when it's time for someone else to be the center of attention. 

And see, that's another thing that strikes me as off: Most people I know with chronic pain go to an awful lot of effort to "fake well," which we do so that our health doesn't become the central topic of conversation or other people's concerns. Not Lori, oh hell no -- she feeds off that shit. 

If I am at a 3 or under I consider it pain free.  I can tolerate up to about a 7 without needing to take break thru meds.  Now that I have meds, if I hit 8+ I take a break thru pill because it's stupid to suffer when I don't have to (though my husband/friends still have to remind me about that sometimes)

The weather here has been very rainy and I've been running 4-5 the last few days.  I notice the difference, but it's not bad enough for extra meds (I like my liver and kidneys so try not to heap extra abuse on them ).

I, too, would normally allow quite a lot of latitude toward a chronic pain sufferer, but there is something about Lori's stories that just don't make sense and we know she is prone to lying/contradicting/hypocrisy.

I find her story about "parasites" to be suspicious as well.  If I had "parasites" I would say I had a tapeworm or I was walking barefoot outside at picked up hookworms (which thankfully has never happened to me!).  She never names the "parasites" and I also find it a bit hard to believe that she and at least several of her children had an active "parasite" infestation and Drs weren't falling all over each other to figure out what was going on.  They live in California, not a developing country which may have medical facilities few and far between.

TL;DR: I think Lori is a liar

[Sarah92]

Lori.... This new post is ridiculous once again. Women have been working for thousands of years. They have however fought for liberation to work in good conditions, to work where they want, and to have respect. Also why is okay for men to work under this slavery but not women? If you wouldn't use this analogy for what a man is doing you can't use it for a woman. 

[SuperNova]

1 hour ago, Curious said:

find her story about "parasites" to be suspicious as well.  If I had "parasites" I would say I had a tapeworm or I was walking barefoot outside at picked up hookworms (which thankfully has never happened to me!).  She never names the "parasites" and I also find it a bit hard to believe that she and at least several of her children had an active "parasite" infestation and Drs weren't falling all over each other to figure out what was going on.

A quick google search for how to get rid of parasites in the gut brings up a host of woo medicine sites. I clicked on several links and no one seems to give a specific name, just parasites. they do list ways that the bugs make their way into your body, like vacations or eating pork. Parasites are closely linked to the old woo standby, leaky gut. Each site I visited had a different pill for sale or a recipe for a home remedy that they happen to sell ingredients for. Or you can follow the link to their favorite health food store. Interestingly, coconut oil factors in quite often. Isn't there someone we know who constantly talks about coconut oil?

[Free Jana Duggar]

I don't doubt Lori had some kind of parasite. Just look how she cleans her kitchen.

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

One of her leghumper fangirls girls had this comment about Lori's latest doodle.

Quote

"..... i love that the family comes home to a clean house...home cooked meals...dishing it up and serving my husband and boys..the smiles on their faces says it all"

None of these women, nor Lori, will ever believe that this happens in my house.  I am an evil, childless, career-having jezebel who leaves home for hours every work day and works for a boss (who is not my husband).  Yet I still manage to have a clean house and a home cooked meal nearly every night.  I serve dinner and Mr. Dress is all smiles about it.  Because he loves my cooking.  Not because I'm serving him, because he doesn't care about that. Although I will admit I get kick out of making him things I know he'll really enjoy,

Housework is not rocket science. Having a clean house and cooking dinner can be done by anyone. It's not the exclusive job of women.  Men can cook too.  They can also clean.  What does Lori think single men do?  Live at home and let their mothers do everything or have a bachelor apt with a maid and eat out every night?

My mother and all her friends were SAHM.  Intelligent, driven, interesting, opinionated, well-read, educated women --  they were all bored out of their minds without careers.  Not one of them would have said she loved being home no matter how much they loved the hubs and children (and they all did).

So they filled their days with clubs and committees and charitable works.   I will admit they were all amazing cooks, but none of them were doing more than what my mother called "plain cooking" for dinner.  It was healthy, nutritious. tasty and from scratch-- but it was things like meatloaf, beef stew, baked chicken, pounded round steak, etc. with 2 veg, possibly salad, and a starch. 

TL:DR  My point is that being a "keeper at home" and cooking dinner only took up a fraction of their time.

And obviously it doesn't take up all of Lori's time as she has her FB, blog, You Tubes, chatroom and IG to handle as well as her 5-6 hours of research per day.  Wow -- with all of that no wonder she only has time for 5-10 minutes and some lube every 2nd day or so.

Adding:  I've told Mr Dress some about Lori and her "Christian" beliefs. Lately every time he sees me reading TW, he refers to her as the Uninformed Wife

[Loveday]

 What exactly IS 'leaky gut?' I'm afraid to google it for fear I'll just get a bunch of woo sites SuperNova mentioned, trying to sell me crap (no pun intended). Or worse, hour-long videos that go on and on, Ken Alexander-style, before getting to the point,  if they even do (which Ken usually does not). I'm always having minor gut issues, so I need to know--are my guts leaking, and if so, where is it all going?

Sorry, that just sounds gross, doesn't it?

[Frog99]

2 minutes ago, Loveday said:

 What exactly IS 'leaky gut?' I'm afraid to google it for fear I'll just get a bunch of woo sites SuperNova mentioned, trying to sell me crap (no pun intended). Or worse, hour-long videos that go on and on, Ken Alexander-style, before getting to the point,  if they even do (which Ken usually does not). I'm always having minor gut issues, so I need to know--are my guts leaking, and if so, where is it all going?

Sorry, that just sounds gross, doesn't it?

Here’s a link: https://www.webmd.com/digestive-disorders/features/leaky-gut-syndrome 

It does bring up woo sites but I found the one above relatively quickly. 

[Loveday]

2 minutes ago, Frog99 said:

Here’s a link: https://www.webmd.com/digestive-disorders/features/leaky-gut-syndrome 

It does bring up woo sites but I found the one above relatively quickly. 

Thank you! And it's WebMD, one of my go-to sites!  

 

[Frog99]

The whole bit about having parasites baffles me too. It makes me remember a show from years ago- it was on nbc or cbs I think- a drama medical show where people would show up in the ER with medical mysteries and the doctors would be scrambling to identify what was wrong (I can’t remember the name- I don’t think it lasted long). Anyway, on one episode, a girl reported with intense abdominal pain and such. They did some sort of scan and it turned out that she had parasites all in her intestines. She has been taking fat burners or diet pills. Makes me wonder if Lori didn’t have her kids and herself on some herbal remedy that kept reintroducing them into their systems (far fetched I know). 

I wonder where the disordered thinking regarding food and health actually stems from. One of Lori’s sisters is into that (she seems to be a resource for Lori and was at the same NT convention with Alyssa)- it has me kind of curious. 

[Briefly]

20 minutes ago, Frog99 said:

The whole bit about having parasites baffles me too. It makes me remember a show from years ago- it was on nbc or cbs I think- a drama medical show where people would show up in the ER with medical mysteries and the doctors would be scrambling to identify what was wrong (I can’t remember the name- I don’t think it lasted long). Anyway, on one episode, a girl reported with intense abdominal pain and such. They did some sort of scan and it turned out that she had parasites all in her intestines. She has been taking fat burners or diet pills. Makes me wonder if Lori didn’t have her kids and herself on some herbal remedy that kept reintroducing them into their systems (far fetched I know). 

I wonder where the disordered thinking regarding food and health actually stems from. One of Lori’s sisters is into that (she seems to be a resource for Lori and was at the same NT convention with Alyssa)- it has me kind of curious. 

I remember that show, it was only on a few episodes. It was really badly done, the doctors never wore any protective gear, etc. and seemed to be able to diagnose things just be looking at the patient.

7 hours ago, polecat said:

As a fellow chronic pain sufferer, yeah. 

Chronic migraines here as well as a disorder that causes pain in subcutaneous tissue. If my brain isn't hurting, the rest of my body does. And anything between 4-7 is pretty much a normal day. I have to work, take care of my kids, take care of my house, etc. Sometimes things just don't get done if the pain is really bad (like an 8 or 9) -- if the house gets trashed so that I have the energy to go to my kid's drama production, then that's what's going to happen. So be it.

In normal situations, I'd never begrudge a fellow pain sufferer the "luxury" of lying down and preserving their precious energy. You do what you've got to do. But in Lori's case, I find all of her stories suspect. As you said, that pain sure does crop up conveniently when it's time for someone else to be the center of attention. 

And see, that's another thing that strikes me as off: Most people I know with chronic pain go to an awful lot of effort to "fake well," which we do so that our health doesn't become the central topic of conversation or other people's concerns. Not Lori, oh hell no -- she feeds off that shit. 

I have had migraines since I was about 12, they are a lot better now (mid-50's) but they were killers for many years. I have fairly constant pain from my knees.  I know that what I have to deal with is nowhere near as bad as other people have and it really makes me mad that people with severe or chronic pain/illness issues are not believed.  Then Lori comes along and you know what?  I don't believe her.  I think you are right, Polecat - she feeds off of others.

[mango_fandango]

Fuck me. Lori is an arse.

My ASD makes me pretty literal-minded at times. I can’t bullshit. I found English essays hard at school because I don’t have that analytical kind of mind, trying to work out what exactly the question was asking was always difficult for me. I can *spot* bullshit (which is useful for this site and following fundies) but can’t waffle in essays. I wasn’t really a maths/science person either, my skill was in languages. 

I also have some kind of anxiety. I don’t get physical symptoms, I just shut down mentally/can get upset fairly quickly. It’s primarily social as you’d expect with ASD. I’m trying to get some kind of CBT/counselling type thing. I don’t know if I’d be serious enough to warrant meds, but I would never ever tell someone they don’t need any. That’s crazy talk. Sure, you get side effects, but you can get side effects with any drug. 

Oh, one last thing: FUCK YOU LORI YOU ASSHAT

[Koala]

Lori's "homeworker" post on FB is a complete joke.  She wouldn't know work if it bit her.

While Lori was enjoying her carpet that "never needs to be vacuumed", wiping her counters with rags she honestly thinks don't need to be washed, and eating week old soup and salad, I was doing...actual work.

I taught my kids the wonder that is making freezer meals, today.  Last night my husband and I went on a "date" to Sam's to buy all of the ingredients and containers.

Then today we made manicotti, baked spaghetti, chili, hashbrown casserole, shepherd's pie, enchiladas, a breakfast casserole,  2 dinners worth of vegetable beef soup, and pulled pork.  We made a hell of a mess doing it, but it's all done, cleaned, and in the freezer now (thank God).  

While we cooked, I explained to my daughter that make ahead freezer meals were a great way for moms w/ careers to save time and make their lives easier.  You see, while I may be a sahm, my daughter wants to go into the medical field.  I think sometimes she worries about how she'll do it all, since I've always been a sahm, but I assure her that she is going to be just fine (and she is!).  

While various things cooked, my daughter did her own laundry, cleaned her room, and read a book she got for her birthday.  She loved learning all of the recipes, and I could tell she really enjoyed the day.  So did I.  

All of that said, my daughter doesn't need to skip college to learn how to keep a house- she already knows how to do that, and so does my son.  In fact, both of my teenage children know how to cook and keep a house.  

I am so proud of my kids, and my heart breaks for the girls who desperately want college and careers, but have the opportunity literally robbed from them by their parents.  It's not right.  

And can I just say again that the idea of Lori being a "homeworker" is a complete joke?  Because it is.  

 

[Koala]

Okay, chiming back in one more time, because seriously?  Is Ken out of his mind?  

Here they are, wasting yet another Saturday, soliciting back pats for Lori.  Pitiful. 

Ken writes:

Quote

The list is many and varied with much of the angst over how Lori runs her blog, not allowing detractors to plant their weeds of comments on her pages. In today’s world of “no holds barred” social media, how can that be fair?

Hey, Ken?  Remember this post?  You wrote it.  The summary?  "Life isn't fair, but you're still pretty damn privileged, so suck it up buttercup."

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2012/08/its-not-fair.html

Quote

The problem is that Lori’s blog only belongs to one person, the Lord God. 

No, Ken.  A deity doesn't own your wife's blog, she does.  She's been very clear about that.

See this post?  It's called "Welcome to My New Blog".  

https://thetransformedwife.com/welcome-to-my-new-blog/

Unless you are claiming that God himself wrote that post, then it can only serve as further evidence that The Transformed Wife and Always Learning both belong to Lori.

If that's not enough to convince you, take a look at this.

Lori Alexander:

Quote

... it’s my blog. Just as you wouldn’t like my dog pooping on your yard and leaving it there, I don’t allow others to poop all over my blog and Facebook page since it takes away and distracts from what I am trying to teach. 

You see, these blogs very much belong to Lori, and what they contain (in Lori's words) is HER interpretation of scripture.  Interpretation is the key word here.  She writes what she THINKS scripture means.  

Lori Alexander:

Quote

 I share my views and interpretations of God’s Word 

Now that we've established who owns LORI ALEXANDER'S blog <---because it's definitely hers, let's move on.

Ken writes:

Quote

Even children will be abused if you teach modest spanking like the Bible and our parents taught us.

Ken, we've gone over this multiple times, but there is nothing "modest" about a leather strap.  There is nothing "modest" about telling a clearly abusive mom (who thought she'd broken her child's arm) that if she hits hard enough it will work.  

You have admitted that you and Lori disagree on this subject, so it's probably best to just stick with that instead of propagating the lie that Lori advises "modest spanking".  She doesn't, and pretending that she does just makes you look foolish.  

Shall I quote the comments where one of Lori's readers admitted to spanking her non verbal/non mobile 11 year old??  Lori allowed those comments to stand.  Do you consider that "modest"?  Do you REALLY think that's okay?

Up Next...

Ken Alexander:

Quote

Lori and I have regularly repeated the mantra that if you feel you are being abused in any way, please seek local counsel on the matter

Oh, Ken.  No. No, that's no true at all.  Not one little bit.  Here's why.

Ken Alexander:

Quote

just because a wife is emotionally abused does not mean she should leave her man or take him to the elders, or separate.

THAT is your mantra.  

Ken continues:

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Lori wants to keep our opponents’ opinionated comments from distracting what the Word and her wisdom teaches.

Well unfortunately for Lori, she doesn't get to control other people or their opinions.  If someone says something that distracts from Lori's "wisdom" (hang on just a second...gotta do something.    <---Sorry!  That was my reaction to the notion that Lori has wisdom.  Anyway, if someone says something that distracts from Lori's "wisdom", then as Lori reminds her readers often, "Life is NOT fair".   She certainly doesn't worry when she's "distracting" from Sarah Young's wisdom, does she?

Lori's wisdom... Gets me every time.

Ken:

Quote

If you want to live within an Egalitarian marriage and work a forty hour work week away from your babies… then go for it. It’s your life

Does anyone remember the time that Ken came here and told us that his marriage to Lori was very much egalitarian in practice?  I do.

Quote

It might surprise you too that my marriage is very much egalitarian in the way it functions, and I like it that way. 

Does anyone remember who required Lori to work a 40 hour week away from her baby (until she sabotaged her birth control and had their second baby)?  I do.

Lori:

Quote

Ken told me I could stay home after I had my second baby. I was a full-time school teacher. I wanted to stay home with Alyssa so badly that I put a hole in my diaphragm and we conceived Ryan!

Yes, Ken required Lori to "work a forty hour work week away from her baby".

Moving along, Ken says (in the comments):

Quote

As if we have any need to be frugal at our stage of life having been relatively frugal and successful for the last 40 years.

Well excuse me Ken, but I believe it's Lori who is regularly harping on readers to be more frugal/bragging about how frugal she is.  THAT is why people find it so absolutely over the top funny/hypocritical when she goes on to brag about how much money she wastes.  I could link COUNTLESS posts she's written on this topic, but this one immediately comes to mind:

https://thetransformedwife.com/dissipating-her-husbands-substance/

But by all means, if you have no need to be frugal, then knock yourself out.  I guess a person who considers their children "the best retirement plan" doesn't really have a need to save money.  You can just let your adult kids support you and your $14 butter habit.  Good luck with that.

Quote

But once one gets onto the gossip and destruction cycle, it is hard to get off as it provides a certain kind of high 

If anyone would know, it'd be Lori.

What a post.    

[Carol]

Lori, I think you're a liar and a narcissist.  I don't think you have a loving bone in your body towards anyone who doesn't think you are the best thing since almighty god.  You married Ken because he was "cute" and wanted to be successful, therefore affording you the life you thought you deserved.  You didn't love him, you saw him as your meal ticket.  After you married he wanted you to work...an unexpected delay in your plans to be a lazy, entitled housewife.  You got angry enough to have kids you didn't want so you wouldn't have to continuing working.  They were another meal ticket, a means to an end to an easy life.

You treated them like shit.  You abused them and excused yourself by quoting hand- picked bible verses.  You were so disinterested in being a mom you hired a nanny to care for them.  When that didn't help as much as you thought it might, you devised an illness that was suitably horrible but hard to pin down with a clear diagnosis.  Parasites.  It allowed you to be  so sick that you had to be the center of attention in your family.  You ruined countless family outings, marriages and get togethers because you didn't like the focus on anyone besides yourself.

For 30 years your marriage was hell for everyone involved until at some point Ken gave you an ultimatum.  "Put out or leave"  and, like you, he used Bible versus to back his demands.  Oops!  That's when you and he began building your own little sick theology because, god knows, it had to be biblical for you to have a reason to give in.  In turn, you developed a mean blog full of self hate.  If you had to give in, every other woman had to give in, too.  Despite your desire to become to be an internationally successful christian blogger, you've received far, far more derision than accolades.  You are desperate for another post to go viral, even if it paints you as an ugly person.  At least it gets attention, something you crave desperately even as you watch other christian female bloggers with kinder and gentler approaches beat you all to hell in the numbers game.

Bless your heart.