Dillards 43: Tweeting for God

[feministxtian]

No y'all...I WIN the husband sweepstakes...he's taken me to work and picked me up every day last week and so far this week. Today he took me to pick my car up from the shop...Tomorrow it goes to get smogged and Monday we'll finally get it registered and he'll be released from chauffeuring my fat ass all over town.

[IrishCarrie]

It's the smugness.

That's the single biggest reason that Jill drives me nuts. It's not enough for her to be pleased that someone else cooked dinner while she was busy (we'd all be happy to have that happen!) - she has to relate it back to the amazing godly husband that she got, by being soooooo perfect and doing everything right. First kisses at the altar, y'all! Letting daddy pick your man for you! Be like meeeeeee!

Rant over. Jeebus, she's pitifully unaware of how she comes across. 

[cascarones]

I can't really focus on anything besides the fact they were eating dinner right next to a scented candle. Seems so odd to me since taste and smell are intertwined.

I'll try anyway, while she praised him she also did a humble brag/ took a slight dig at him over how she was putting down fussy kids. Maybe he was helping and went off to make dinner seeing it would take awhile, maybe he wasn't. It's the find a man like mine stuff that is off putting.

I truly think being thankful in a relationship is important, especially for the small things, I also think we give and receive thanks in different ways. While social media isn't a love language yet, Derick's constant tweeting even knowing he'll get major backlash indicates how important it is to him to be a public figure. Jill gets that and maybe she's trying to counter balance his social media feedback with her instagram and comments, people do seem to much more sympathetic and encouraging to her posts.

[VelociRapture]

14 hours ago, HarleyQuinn said:

This is a step up from when she posted her bible on her bed, candlelight, and lifesavers, right? #Fundiekink

 

Once again, it was Derick posting weird shit. Not Jill. 

Spoiler

 

And sorry for the TT photo. It’s just too perfect not to use sometimes... especially in a thread for one of his biggest fan boys. 

ETA: Heres Jill’s Valentine’s Day post. Still sappy, but way less awkward than Derick’s:

Spoiler

 

 

[SapphireSlytherin]

1 hour ago, cascarones said:

right next to a scented candle.

Same. That was my first thought.

1 hour ago, VelociRapture said:

Once again, it was Derick posting weird shit.

That candle ON THE BED gives me the heebie jeebies.

Am I the only one, here, who has ZERO candles in my house? I don't want the fire risk - and that candle ON THE BED??? All I can think of is a slight jostle of the bed as one of them walked past it and whoosh!

[nst]

16 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

All I can think of is a slight jostle of the bed as one of them walked past it and whoosh!

I have candles in my earthquake kit  but they are in jars if that makes any sense 

and I have two earthquake kits - one in the car and one in my apt 

 

[bekkah]

The thing about the Dillards is that they seem to think that there is only one way of doing things according to God. 

As a practicing Christian, one of the most amazing things is being set free from OT law and allowing you to keep your cultural practices.  There is no set way to be saved from Jesus.  For her, her culture is to be super focused on keeping pure and having the babies.  I chalk it up to possibly being a pharisee. 

[samurai_sarah]

2 hours ago, IrishCarrie said:

It's the smugness.

That's the single biggest reason that Jill drives me nuts. It's not enough for her to be pleased that someone else cooked dinner while she was busy (we'd all be happy to have that happen!) - she has to relate it back to the amazing godly husband that she got, by being soooooo perfect and doing everything right. First kisses at the altar, y'all! Letting daddy pick your man for you! Be like meeeeeee!

Rant over. Jeebus, she's pitifully unaware of how she comes across. 

There must be some seriously dark forces in the world at work! Mr samurai_sarah makes me breakfast every single morning, and I cook dinner every single evening. We have a cleaning rota, everyone does their own laundry with shared items on a need-to-do basis, do our food from scratch and don't believe in any deity.

Dark forces are at work in our partnership, I tell you!

[Drala]

Spoiler

 

"Well, you came to the right place - this is it!
I got the most sanctified johnson in all Arkansas" 

Although this is a slight misquote of Frank Zappa on the location of that sanctified johnson,  I can't get the image and lyrics out of  my head.

[clueliss]

I'm certain all of you have wonderful husbands - but I don't believe any of you since you didn't document it with an Instagram or blog post.  (I don't have a spouse/partner, do not want one and the feline headship will not lower herself to such behavior)

[samurai_sarah]

3 minutes ago, clueliss said:

I'm certain all of you have wonderful husbands - but I don't believe any of you since you didn't document it with an Instagram or blog post.  (I don't have a spouse/partner, do not want one and the feline headship will not lower herself to such behavior)

Hush! If you keep this up, they'll all know that we're just human, making it up as we go along!

[NotQuiteMotY]

16 hours ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

Y'all. I win:  my hubby TEXTED ME today.

Mine LOADED THE DISHWASHER. 

Seriously, this glorifying of things husbands do is ridiculous (on the fundie Instagrams. Not the thread). Woo-hoo, your spouse contributes to the house he lives in and takes care of the kids he fathered! Whatta guy! 

3 hours ago, cascarones said:

I can't really focus on anything besides the fact they were eating dinner right next to a scented candle. Seems so odd to me since taste and smell are intertwined.

It does seem bizarre. Unless his cooking is that bad? 

I do agree with the rest of your post. It's important to be thankful in a relationship. It's just the way it's presented on Jill's posts lately is...odd. Maybe passive-aggressive? Something. Though I'm not sure whether it's aimed at her husband or us doubting heathens.

1 hour ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

That candle ON THE BED gives me the heebie jeebies.

Oh yes. Can anyone say "fire hazard", boys and girls?

[llg1234]

Anddd more cooking praise, this time from Derick.

Spoiler

 

He then used this energy to go work/get into an arguement on Twitter. The initial tweet:

Spoiler

 

 

[zygote373]

Between what @llg1234 just posted and the following tweet:

I think we need an eyeroll reaction just for our friend hipster jesus, bravely spreading the truth about apples.

[ViolaSebastian]

This is a moron bully. You can dress it up like a smart, caring person, but it's still a bully moron. #FactsFirst

[samurai_sarah]

1 hour ago, NotQuiteMotY said:

Mine LOADED THE DISHWASHER. 

Seriously, this glorifying of things husbands do is ridiculous (on the fundie Instagrams. Not the thread). Woo-hoo, your spouse contributes to the house he lives in and takes care of the kids he fathered! Whatta guy! 

(snip)

Men can carry their share in the household?!? That's just crazy-talk. /end snark

[PennySycamore]

OK, this is BEC, but that omelet that Dwreck posted a picture of looks  completely unappetizing and I love omelets.  And FFS, use a real plate that has to be washed.

[Marly]

When used unironically, like Derick does, I find  'wifey' to be an utterly condescending term. 
Ugh. No, just no. Just hearing/reading the word makes me feel disgusted. 
Using wifey = no respect for women, and your wife in particular, whatsoever.
 

[MayMay1123]

is that a paper plate on top of a styrofoam plate? there's only 4 of them, there's no excuse for that shit! although the plastic bag and the toothpicks suggest he took it with him somewhere...but why? the whole thing is weird

and is the tweet a thinly veiled, anti-transgender people, what passes for a thought from him?

[Buzzard]

52 minutes ago, llg1234 said:

 

  Hide contents

 

Work?  What is this "work" that you speak of?  

[front hugs > duggs]

So, 1- Samuel looks both amazingly adorable with those eyes in that picture, while at the same time looking like he's internally screaming "help meeee!"

and 2- CNN has been actually posting the Apple picture with the question "Is this an apple or banana?" and a lesson on Facts First. Is it remotely possible that Dwreck is reading CNN over the magnificent Fox News?!?!?

[apandaaries]

21 minutes ago, MayMay1123 said:

is that a paper plate on top of a styrofoam plate? there's only 4 of them, there's no excuse for that shit! although the plastic bag and the toothpicks suggest he took it with him somewhere...but why? the whole thing is weird

 

Seriously!  Enough with the fucking paper plates!  What kinds of "stewards of the Earth" are these lazy fools?  And why a plastic bag? No place mats? Just wipe up afterwards. Why waste more plastic in a world already swimming in it? Stop it! 

Why are these people so simultaneously arrogant and lazy?!? 

[nst]

1 hour ago, Marly said:

When used unironically, like Derick does, I find  'wifey' to be an utterly condescending term. 
Ugh. No, just no. Just hearing/reading the word makes me feel disgusted. 
Using wifey = no respect for women, and your wife in particular, whatsoever.
 

when he uses the term wifey - I just think of Judy Blume

 

[VelociRapture]

@MayMay1123He stated in the caption that Jill sent it for his lunch at work. I’m assuming by “work” he actually means, “Tweeting hate at transgender teens from the Cross Church basement,” but I could be wrong. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

Am I the only one who thinks poor little Sammy is screaming for someone to come save him from the fucking crazy that is his life?