The Seewalds, Part 11: Future Baby Mama

[Gillyweed]

3 minutes ago, Carm_88 said:

I thought the same thing! I don't think that Izzy will ever not look like JB, he has his eyes. Spurgeon seems to have big eyes like Jessa which makes him look less like JB. Somewhat similar but not like mini Boob! 

Same! When I look at Izzy, he looks like all the other Duggar kids. Spurgeon, on the other hand, looks different. I think his hair also sets him apart-- it's wavy and dark. All the Duggar kids/M kids/Izzy have/had blonde hair as a little kid.

[Carm_88]

18 hours ago, Gillyweed said:

Same! When I look at Izzy, he looks like all the other Duggar kids. Spurgeon, on the other hand, looks different. I think his hair also sets him apart-- it's wavy and dark. All the Duggar kids/M kids/Izzy have/had blonde hair as a little kid.

Oh wow! I think you're right, part of it is the blonde hair and the thought that Izzy could be put in with the Howlers when they were young and there wouldn't be much difference. Spurgie definitely has the curls. It will be interesting to see what the next child looks like he or she may be all Ben. 

[actuallyjessica]

Oh wow! I think you're right, part of it is the blonde hair and the thought that Izzy could be put in with the Howlers when they were young and there wouldn't be much difference. Spurgie definitely has the curls. It will be interesting to see what the next child looks like he or she may be all Ben. 

I think if there's a girl they'll look like Guinn and Ben's sister... Michelle? Just a feeling.

[Carm_88]

22 minutes ago, actuallyjessica said:

I think if there's a girl they'll look like Guinn and Ben's sister... Michelle? Just a feeling.

If it's a baby that looks like Ben's sister Danielle. That will be a pretty cute baby too. Let's hope that a girl looks more like Ben's side than Michelle...

[Percy]

That blind item page has Ben going to strip shows.

How does the writer he get his information?  Does he confirm things before printing them?

How does he not get legal action taken against him?

I read for the giggles but it must hurt some he writes about.

[VixenToast]

Ooh, I wouldn't mind seeing a Danielle 2.0 with some of Jessa's features. That'd be stunning. Keeping my fingers crossed for them to have a girl.

[Bad Wolf]

I think the blind item had JB and Josh going to strip shows too. 

[Carm_88]

17 hours ago, Percy said:

That blind item page has Ben going to strip shows.

How does the writer he get his information?  Does he confirm things before printing them?

How does he not get legal action taken against him?

I read for the giggles but it must hurt some he writes about.

I was just about to question if Ben is old enough to get into strip shows but he is. I'm not sure how the writer gets his information or if he confirms it. I think he doesn't get legal action taken against him because he never says names. Just stays perfectly vague. 

[VineHeart137]

18 hours ago, Percy said:

That blind item page has Ben going to strip shows.

How does the writer he get his information?  Does he confirm things before printing them?

How does he not get legal action taken against him?

I read for the giggles but it must hurt some he writes about.

I didn't read the page, but if it's not true, shame on the writer. Strip clubs and the like are already a tender spot for the Duggars. Even an unsubstantiated rumor could cause some pain. I don't really care about Boob and DQ but I do still have some empathy for the kids.

[SassyPants]

16 hours ago, Bad Wolf said:

I think the blind item had JB and Josh going to strip shows too. 

AND... I personally believe this one.

[Carm_88]

17 hours ago, Bad Wolf said:

I think the blind item had JB and Josh going to strip shows too. 

Josh probably was. Given the things that we know about him now...I don't know about JB though. 

And I don't know about Ben either. It's hard to say. He hardly risk it would he? After being around through the Josh scandals? 

[VooDooChild]

26 minutes ago, Carm_88 said:

Josh probably was. Given the things that we know about him now...I don't know about JB though. 

And I don't know about Ben either. It's hard to say. He hardly risk it would he? After being around through the Josh scandals? 

Would Binny be smart enough to understand that might damage his future wannabe career as preacher?

Ooo...Interesting.  This is like asking "How many licks does it take to the get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?"

One may never find out....

[calimojo]

I imagine that Blind Item is baseless.  I honestly think that Ben is pretty sincere in his convictions and faith.  I think Josh was not.  But he was too cowardly to walk away from the cult because he would have lost his job with FRC and lost his financial security from JB.  I don't condone anything that Josh has done, but I have empathy for him.  He was  raised by terrible parents.  His actions show just how harmful that restrictive lifestyle and belief system really are.  

I don't see Ben visiting a strip club.  If he were ever involved in extra-marital situations, I think it would be more likely to come about from him becoming close to someone he was attempting to minister to.  Someone who might have more spark and intelligence than Jessa.  I believe it is likely that Jessa is as self-actualized as she is likely to get for a long time, where as I think Ben is more likely to mature and grow past her at some point in time.  He seems more willing to open his mind, and he does seem to value education.  He will out grow Jessa eventually, and she will be unable to keep up because she is first off arrogant about her own ignorance, and she will be mired in raising children, or rather directing her sister moms to raise her children.

If Josh had a better education, he may have had the courage to go off on his own.  But instead he had a substandard education, and he was forced to marry off early so as to contain his sexual issues within a framework that was acceptable to the cult.  Josh never seemed to really be into Anna other than as a vehicle through which he could finally have some sexual relief.  I think it is possible that he grew to love her in some way that he can, but I think he was truly left with a giant hole in him that was asking "Is this all there is?  Is this really the wonderful life that I was promised if I lived in a Godly way?"  And because he never got true therapy or possibly never suffered much in the way of consequence or understanding of his past actions,  he was not able to contain his sexual urges yet again.  I have never been one to believe that Josh has a predilection for pedophilia as much as he acted out with his sisters because they were available to him, and because in the family  power structure, he had power over them.   

[CorruptionInc.]

I honestly don't think Bin would have time to visit the strip club. He hangs out at the TTH with  works with JB and then spends a lot of time with his immediate family. Plus anyone can write rubbish on the internet.

[Carm_88]

I don't think that Ben is going to strip clubs either. Josh I could see, he has the sleazy feel to him. Ben just seems like  someone who has no idea what's going on outside of their own little bubble. I know that he does but I don't think strip clubs would appeal to him. I could be completely wrong, he could be throwing dollar bills at strippers. That's just not the vibe I get of him though

[3KidsAndStopped]

Re Josh, I honestly believe the things he did were a direct result of an overly repressive attitude of the family unit to a teenage boys naturally developing sexuality. Whereas most teenage boys (and girls!) explore both on their own and with their peers this was never an option for Josh. All sexual activity pre marriage was seen to be sinful, it is unlikely Josh even understood the ramifications of what he was doing. We judge him as people who know what he did to be wrong. How would Josh know? I abhor what he did but he cannot in all honesty be held to the same account as someone who has knowledge of what they are doing to be wrong  (as in specifically...to the Duggars everything pre marriage is wrong)  

If Josh had not had it drummed in to him that even touching his own body is wrong, had he been able to develop sexually as any other non repressed teenager and interact with peers his own age and experiment, it is highly unlikely it would have happened. Sure, he may still have had a very high sex drive (hereditary? !) He may still have had affairs. But as unpopular as this comment may be I firmly lay the blame of Josh being inappropriate with whoever when he was still in effect a child himself at Jboob and Jchelles door. Sorry it's how I feel.

[halcionne]

22 hours ago, calimojo said:

Someone who might have more spark and intelligence than Jessa. 

She has more spark and intelligence in her little finger than he does in his whole body. And she's out of his league in most other categories, too.

/unapologetic Jessa stan  

[Carm_88]

3 minutes ago, halcionne said:

She has more spark and intelligence in her little finger than he does in his whole body. And she's out of his league in most other categories, too.

/unapologetic Jessa stan  

Hahah I think that Ben would agree with you on that one! He does seem to be rather in awe of her.  

[SassyPants]

I don't find either one of them particularly intelligent.

[MargaretElliott]

I agree with @3KidsAndStopped, to a degree. I wouldn't venture to guess that Josh wouldn't have committed his crimes if he was raised in a better home environment, we can never truly know. But the toxic culture he was raised in certainly didn't help, and I think with proper sex ed and healthier attitudes about human sexuality instead of the crazy guilt, some of the negative effects could have been mitigated, or avoided altogether.

And yeah, neither Jessa nor Ben seem particularly smart to me. Jessa might have some natural cleverness, but she doesn't see the value of learning, and she's arrogant in her own ignorance. Ben just doesn't seem too smart, even if he's recently started being more curious about the world (that arroz pseudo-joke after Jinjeremy's proposal was physically painful to me. So much cringe)

[calimojo]

Just to amend my previous point of view a bit.  I do agree that Jessa has natural cleverness, but it is exactly as @MargaretElliott said she is doesn't seem to value learning and she is arrogant about her own ignorance.  I think Ben is not very skilled with self expression.  I don't necessarily think that is something that can be learned, though with practice he might be better.  But I think there is some objective evidence that he is fairly bright.  If I recall, he graduated with some sort of academic recognition from the 2 year school he went to, and he is evidently enrolled with Moody Bible College or whatever it is called.  They must have some sort of standards for admission. 

 

I don't hold out hope that he will be the next great intellect of our time, but I do think he could surpass Jessa in terms of insight and understanding, mostly because he is at least willing to learn and to seek knowledge.  Instead of assuming he already knows whatever he needs to know about life after studying with JB and Michelle, he seems to try to improve his understanding.    He can't stray too far though because JB will cut him off.  He needs to stay in the family fold until he finishes school.  By then he and Jessa will likely be on number 3 and maybe the reality of this life he chose will start to really resonate with him. 

 

I guess, having a son about the same age as Ben,  I am kind of willing to give him more time to be fully formed.  His  upbringing seems to have been less rigid as evidenced by some of the freedoms we have seen his sister Jessica embrace as well as they seem to place more value on education. 

[nausicaa]

1 hour ago, MargaretElliott said:

And yeah, neither Jessa nor Ben seem particularly smart to me. Jessa might have some natural cleverness, but she doesn't see the value of learning, and she's arrogant in her own ignorance. Ben just doesn't seem too smart, even if he's recently started being more curious about the world (that arroz pseudo-joke after Jinjeremy's proposal was physically painful to me. So much cringe)

Yes, exactly what I was thinking.

 I think Jessa has quite a bit of natural intelligence--probably the top tier of the Duggar kids we've seen grow to adulthood so far. But she does seem to be incredibly arrogant in her ignorance. Ben comes off as a total doofus, and probably isn't working with tons of extra IQ points, but if he continues to learn about the world and becomes more humble and open, but the time they're 30 he will be loads more interesting and thoughtful than she is. I've seen this happen with kids from high school now that we've been out a little more than a decade.

I think they both will outgrow each other in different ways in the next few years, if they aren't already. One of the biggest drawbacks to getting married so young, especially with so little experience and rushing things so that your sexy time lenses are still blurring everything.

[nastyhobbitses]

7 hours ago, nausicaa said:

Yes, exactly what I was thinking.

 I think Jessa has quite a bit of natural intelligence--probably the top tier of the Duggar kids we've seen grow to adulthood so far. But she does seem to be incredibly arrogant in her ignorance. Ben comes off as a total doofus, and probably isn't working with tons of extra IQ points, but if he continues to learn about the world and becomes more humble and open, but the time they're 30 he will be loads more interesting and thoughtful than she is. I've seen this happen with kids from high school now that we've been out a little more than a decade.

I think they both will outgrow each other in different ways in the next few years, if they aren't already. One of the biggest drawbacks to getting married so young, especially with so little experience and rushing things so that your sexy time lenses are still blurring everything.

BoJack Horseman really does have a quote for everything: "You know, it's funny. When you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags."

[eleanora3]

18 hours ago, Carm_88 said:

Hahah I think that Ben would agree with you on that one! He does seem to be rather in awe of her.  

I don't know if he seems in awe of her. In their joint talking heads he frequently seems annoyed and uncomfortable when she talks. 

[VooDooChild]

21 hours ago, 3KidsAndStopped said:

Re Josh, I honestly believe the things he did were a direct result of an overly repressive attitude of the family unit to a teenage boys naturally developing sexuality. Whereas most teenage boys (and girls!) explore both on their own and with their peers this was never an option for Josh. All sexual activity pre marriage was seen to be sinful, it is unlikely Josh even understood the ramifications of what he was doing. We judge him as people who know what he did to be wrong. How would Josh know? I abhor what he did but he cannot in all honesty be held to the same account as someone who has knowledge of what they are doing to be wrong  (as in specifically...to the Duggars everything pre marriage is wrong)  

If Josh had not had it drummed in to him that even touching his own body is wrong, had he been able to develop sexually as any other non repressed teenager and interact with peers his own age and experiment, it is highly unlikely it would have happened. Sure, he may still have had a very high sex drive (hereditary? !) He may still have had affairs. But as unpopular as this comment may be I firmly lay the blame of Josh being inappropriate with whoever when he was still in effect a child himself at Jboob and Jchelles door. Sorry it's how I feel.

I guess he had some idea it was wrong since he confessed to his parents.  Then repeated the action.  Then confessed again.  While I do place most of the blame for his actions on his parents, I have a hard time seeing him as completely innocent.