Josie & Kelton 7: So Boring that No One Discussed Her Baby Shower

[SassyPants]

Maybe the Bateses girls learned to marry a man with a job and the will to work, while the Duggar girls learned that a scam artist and grifter was the way to go?

[CanadianMamam]

On the topic of appliances for Christmas, my mother bought me a dishwasher 😂. She knows how much I hate mine (it is the one appliance we haven’t replaced since buying hte house) and she told me to pick out a new one 

[Karma]

What bothers me about the fridge gift is that it’s an expensive purchase and does it mean that kelton is the one who controls the finances, rather than then making major purchases in consultation with each other?

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 hours ago, Karma said:

What bothers me about the fridge gift is that it’s an expensive purchase and does it mean that kelton is the one who controls the finances, rather than then making major purchases in consultation with each other?

 

I absolutely hate Christmas car commercials for this reason. My husband and I love to make fun of them. Who the fuck buys a $40,000 new car without telling their spouse?!?! A psychopath that’s who 😝

I would hope they had talked about replacing the fridge sometime in the future and he just surprised her early.

Edited December 26, 2021 by JermajestyDuggar

[sansan]

I guess that I fit some of the examples. I got a shiny red Explorer a long time ago, Christmas Eve. We had talked about getting me a new vehicle but it came sooner than expected. Yes, it was the kind I wanted. We exchange gifts for certain celebrations, empty house now so we spend on each other at times, no big deal really. We had a storm come through about a week ago and it blew down the fence on the side of our house. We had to replace it immediately so on Saturday we told each other Merry Christmas and thanks so much for the fence. Joking of course. 

[just_ordinary]

I think it depends highly on the couple. I can see Kelton and Josie being absolutely fine and happy “gifting” each other bigger purchases they would have splurged on at one point anyway. Now, if Evan buys Carlin a fridge for Christmas I would raise an eyebrow and wonder what’s going on. Certainly not performative Insta romantic for those two. 

[indianabones]

On 12/25/2021 at 5:57 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

I absolutely hate Christmas car commercials for this reason. My husband and I love to make fun of them. Who the fuck buys a $40,000 new car without telling their spouse?!?! A psychopath that’s who 😝

SNL did a sketch about these people.

[LanaBanana]

Josie is on her Instagram stories wondering why her and Kelton are coughing so much while cooking with jerk seasoning and it's killing me. Literally too much spice in the air. I'm glad they are happy with how the dish turned out though, watching Kelton get so into cooking has been pretty interesting.

[JermajestyDuggar]

14 hours ago, LanaBanana said:

Josie is on her Instagram stories wondering why her and Kelton are coughing so much while cooking with jerk seasoning and it's killing me. Literally too much spice in the air. I'm glad they are happy with how the dish turned out though, watching Kelton get so into cooking has been pretty interesting.

I bet the Bateses used very little seasoning in their food when she was growing up. Lots of spices bother me when they are in the air. I just use them carefully. 

[Gottahavedembabies]

Is anyone else shocked at the amount which Kelton, Josie, and Willow all kept their masks on in the airport. I mean I think that’s the most I’ve ever seen a fundie actually pay attention to masking. He was wearing a mask while sleeping on a plane. Granted that’s not a high bar for anyone else- but for them..

[indianabones]

10 minutes ago, Gottahavedembabies said:

Is anyone else shocked at the amount which Kelton, Josie, and Willow all kept their masks on in the airport. I mean I think that’s the most I’ve ever seen a fundie actually pay attention to masking. He was wearing a mask while sleeping on a plane. Granted that’s not a high bar for anyone else- but for them..

Meanwhile, Warden didn't seem to wear a mask at any point in their trip and most of the Bates kept theirs below their noses (included sleeping Kelton).

Not that I'm surprised, as being super spreaders seems to be the family hobby!

[Gottahavedembabies]

Meanwhile, Warden didn't seem to wear a mask at any point in their trip and most of the Bates kept theirs below their noses (included sleeping Kelton).
Not that I'm surprised, as being super spreaders seems to be the family hobby!

Exactly why I was shocked that they masked Willow and actually seemed to keep their masks on (for at least a portion of the trip)

[JermajestyDuggar]

Well at least we know Josie probably isn’t pregnant. She went skiing yesterday in CO with the family. Last year when they went to CO, she didn’t ski because she was pregnant. 

[SassyPants]

11 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Well at least we know Josie probably isn’t pregnant. She went skiing yesterday in CO with the family. Last year when they went to CO, she didn’t ski because she was pregnant. 

The transition from 1 to 2 seems to have been very taxing for Josie. I wonder if they will allow/plan for a bigger spacing the next time?

[CanadianMamam]

Her pregnancy with Hazel was very dangerous and she has been told that future pregnancies will also be dangerous, so maybe they are going to space their pregnancies better because of it. They can't change her clotting factors but they can space their pregnancies out and at least reduce those risks. 

[SassyPants]

10 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

Her pregnancy with Hazel was very dangerous and she has been told that future pregnancies will also be dangerous, so maybe they are going to space their pregnancies better because of it. They can't change her clotting factors but they can space their pregnancies out and at least reduce those risks. 

For mannnnnnnnnnnnnnny couples the clotting issues plus the experience with Hazel requiring  care d/t to these medical issues, and the Dr’s warning that the problems likely would only be worse with future pregnancies (IIRC) would be enough to end the procreation train.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Most of my friends and family members around my age (born in the 80s) are two and through. It’s such a common amount of children in middle class white america. Which means people will marvel at those that have 4 as if it’s a huge amount. I try not to comment on the size of one’s family because I don’t want to be rude. But others definitely comment. 

[SassyPants]

55 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Most of my friends and family members around my age (born in the 80s) are two and through. It’s such a common amount of children in middle class white america. Which means people will marvel at those that have 4 as if it’s a huge amount. I try not to comment on the size of one’s family because I don’t want to be rude. But others definitely comment. 

Children are one of the most expensive commodities in which a  couple can partake. 

Edited January 28, 2022 by SassyPants

[JermajestyDuggar]

13 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

Children are one of the most expensive commodities in which a  couple can partake. 

I have noticed some of the wealthier people I’ve come across around here have more than 2. It’s usually 3 or 4 though. It’s not like the wealthy are having 10 kids, lol.

[Expectopatronus]

14 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I have noticed some of the wealthier people I’ve come across around here have more than 2. It’s usually 3 or 4 though. It’s not like the wealthy are having 10 kids, lol.

It tends to be regional where I live. The southern part of the province is predominantly Mennonite, Brethren or off-shoots thereof so big families are common. Not Duggar/Bates big but 7-13 kids. Apparently, the child benefit payments from the government can be over $2000/month so I gather that helps. A lot of these families public school and as a teacher I just needed to accommodate by not showing movies, reading stories related to Halloween, using playing cards for math games etc. It worked fine and I was glad the kids at least got a grade 12 education. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

44 minutes ago, Expectopatronus said:

It tends to be regional where I live. The southern part of the province is predominantly Mennonite, Brethren or off-shoots thereof so big families are common. Not Duggar/Bates big but 7-13 kids. Apparently, the child benefit payments from the government can be over $2000/month so I gather that helps. A lot of these families public school and as a teacher I just needed to accommodate by not showing movies, reading stories related to Halloween, using playing cards for math games etc. It worked fine and I was glad the kids at least got a grade 12 education. 

I think the Bateses did gifts on “I love you day” February 14th because Gil and Kelly had a ton of money during tax time due to their many dependents. They didn’t have the money at Christmas but they had it at tax time in February. 

[CanadianMamam]

2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Most of my friends and family members around my age (born in the 80s) are two and through. It’s such a common amount of children in middle class white america. Which means people will marvel at those that have 4 as if it’s a huge amount. I try not to comment on the size of one’s family because I don’t want to be rude. But others definitely comment. 

My circle of friends tends to have 3 or 4. The ones with 2 or less are the oddities and usually there is a reason. 3 seems to be the new cool numberm

2 hours ago, SassyPants said:

For mannnnnnnnnnnnnnny couples the clotting issues plus the experience with Hazel requiring  care d/t to these medical issues, and the Dr’s warning that the problems likely would only be worse with future pregnancies (IIRC) would be enough to end the procreation train.

But she only has girls. If Hazel had been a boy, I wonder if they would be done. 

[just_ordinary]

8 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

My circle of friends tends to have 3 or 4. The ones with 2 or less are the oddities and usually there is a reason. 3 seems to be the new cool numberm

But she only has girls. If Hazel had been a boy, I wonder if they would be done. 

BIB: in my country 0-2 was the overwhelming majority. In the late 80/90s 3 was a BIG family, 4 was basically a social worker case. But I definitely see a shift in the last 7 years. 3 is definitely on the rise and even 4 are more and more publicly accepted. But 4 is definitely still a BIG family here. Not just because of the amount of children but because our infrastructure is definitely not exactly build for bigger families. Big cars (family vans) have problems with our more narrow parking garages and spaces, gas/fuel is EXPENSIVE and taxes/insurance/purchase prices for cars as well. So buying such a car and running it is a massive cost factor. Our houses are definitely smaller than in the US + renting is very popular, especially in cities (it’s pretty much an average between 50% owning and 50% renting). But that’s expensive as well and most flats are 2-4 rooms + kitchen + bathroom (a second guest toilet if you’re lucky). If you are renting the average square metres are between 60 and 75m2 (depending on where you live). That’s a tight squeeze with 4 children (depending on how your flat is designed). And we have some other weird quirks that make more children more expensive. We have a weird thing about shoes. Second hand shoes are not the norm. I think it is a weird foot health obsession from the 80s - when our parents all forced our poor feet into those torture devices called Birkenstock. So orthopaedic (maybe after you got over the 6 months blister stage). The idea that a shoe deforms fitting to your foot structure and therefore is not good for someone else is really prevalent. Many parents try not to use hand me down shoes that have actually been worn a lot. And there is definitely an obsession with brands that are all about foot health for children aka expensive. If you think about how quickly children’s feet are growing sometimes that can add up to quite the substantial amount. It’s an interesting quirk of us, because I don’t think we have healthier feet than the rest of the world as a result. Almost everyone sends their child to kindergarten (age 3-6). They want you to store rain boots, mud clothes etc. there, so they can go out at every weather. Which means you have often enough two sets per child. Same for indoor shoes and footwear for inside the gym. One in kindergarten permanently and one at home (because no one carries a massive set back and forth daily). Obviously you can do it differently but that’s the overall cultural and expectation we subconsciously subscribe to. Things thankfully seem to go more into a less rigid judging direction nowadays. Just like the bottle or boob, natural or C-section discussion have eased up quite a bit. More people just don’t care what others think and people start to accept that different choices are not a threat to/invalidating your own decisions.

Edited January 28, 2022 by just_ordinary

[SassyPants]

I think there are many reasons why people limit family size, but probably cost ranks pretty near the top. I had 1 coworker with 4 kids ( 2 sets of spontaneously occurring twins). She had a good deal of family help and a husband who was extremely hands on. Her kids are early to mid 30s, so it was sometime ago. In my 35 year career I never worked with anyone who had more than 4 kids.  More people means you need more money to survive and provide for. We only have two and could never figure out how to have 3 without needing more money or how to cut back on our work schedules. More people and less income? Nope-

[HerNameIsBuffy]

7 hours ago, just_ordinary said:

BIB: in my country 0-2 was the overwhelming majority. In the late 80/90s 3 was a BIG family, 4 was basically a social worker case. But I definitely see a shift in the last 7 years. 3 is definitely on the rise and even 4 are more and more publicly accepted. But 4 is definitely still a BIG family here. Not just because of the amount of children but because our infrastructure is definitely not exactly build for bigger families. Big cars (family vans) have problems with our more narrow parking garages and spaces, gas/fuel is EXPENSIVE and taxes/insurance/purchase prices for cars as well. So buying such a car and running it is a massive cost factor. Our houses are definitely smaller than in the US + renting is very popular, especially in cities (it’s pretty much an average between 50% owning and 50% renting). But that’s expensive as well and most flats are 2-4 rooms + kitchen + bathroom (a second guest toilet if you’re lucky). If you are renting the average square metres are between 60 and 75m2 (depending on where you live). That’s a tight squeeze with 4 children (depending on how your flat is designed). And we have some other weird quirks that make more children more expensive. We have a weird thing about shoes. Second hand shoes are not the norm. I think it is a weird foot health obsession from the 80s - when our parents all forced our poor feet into those torture devices called Birkenstock. So orthopaedic (maybe after you got over the 6 months blister stage). The idea that a shoe deforms fitting to your foot structure and therefore is not good for someone else is really prevalent. Many parents try not to use hand me down shoes that have actually been worn a lot. And there is definitely an obsession with brands that are all about foot health for children aka expensive. If you think about how quickly children’s feet are growing sometimes that can add up to quite the substantial amount. It’s an interesting quirk of us, because I don’t think we have healthier feet than the rest of the world as a result. Almost everyone sends their child to kindergarten (age 3-6). They want you to store rain boots, mud clothes etc. there, so they can go out at every weather. Which means you have often enough two sets per child. Same for indoor shoes and footwear for inside the gym. One in kindergarten permanently and one at home (because no one carries a massive set back and forth daily). Obviously you can do it differently but that’s the overall cultural and expectation we subconsciously subscribe to. Things thankfully seem to go more into a less rigid judging direction nowadays. Just like the bottle or boob, natural or C-section discussion have eased up quite a bit. More people just don’t care what others think and people start to accept that different choices are not a threat to/invalidating your own decisions.

I don't know where you live, but I when my kids were small thrifting was becoming a thing and it was impressed hard upon me by my parents that you never, ever buy second hand shoes.  My father didn't believe in second hand anything, but even growing up with siblings where you'd get hand-me-downs never shoes.  Same reason, they conform to the feet of the previous wearer and can cause issues.

Buying quality shoes and mattresses was always a thing in my family, as to skimp on those things can hurt your back, gait, and such.  

We also had indoor shoes to be left at school as did my kids.  

You aren't German by any chance, are you?