Trace Bates 1: The Flossing Fundie

[anjulibai]

18 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

If I was a fundie match maker, I would tell Nathan to approach Allison Bontrager. She’s a farm girl who would likely move for her intended and would likely be fine with having a big family. Plus she already has a bit of notoriety with her family. So she could probably handle the filming of BUB. 

And I would tell Trace to go after Hannah Wissmann. She is also a farm girl who would probably move away from her family and have lots of kids no problem.

Ooo, Allison and Nathan would be perfect for one another. She's got a bit of spunk and does wear pants occasionally, but likes the farm life and being at home submitting to her godly husband. I bet she'd love the prestige of being married to a (wanna-be) preacher, too. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 minutes ago, anjulibai said:

Ooo, Allison and Nathan would be perfect for one another. She's got a bit of spunk and does wear pants occasionally, but likes the farm life and being at home submitting to her godly husband. I bet she'd love the prestige of being married to a (wanna-be) preacher, too. 

They know each other. Actually Nathan was at Chelsy and John’s wedding. But that was 2 years ago and no announcement. So I guess they don’t think they would be a good match. I personally think Allison is currently in a relationship (not Nathan) because her mood has been so much better this past year. The Bontragers don’t announce until engagement but I feel like it would be impossible for Allison and Nathan to date longer than a month without people finding out. 

Edited February 4, 2020 by JermajestyDuggar

[rebeccawriter01]

I have always assumed that Carlin had a failed relationship (maybe not courtship). In the episode where she visits Evan in Nashville and goes skateboarding while Katie chaperones, there is a bit of a clue. Evan wrote a song that was "inspired" by her and what she had "gone through." The lyrics describe someone who had her heart broken and how the guy didn't appreciate her.

I feel bad for Trace to have to go through a break up in a family that puts a lot of value on marriage and kids. I hope he has a Zach healing process more than a Nathan one though. Find a non-fundie and piss off your parents, Trace.

[Tangy Bee]

3 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

For some reason, the Morton boys seem to be able to do this. They find the little spunky fundie girls that are somehow willing to live on the Morton farm and pop out 4 kids in less than 3.5 years. 

This is true, but don't forget just about all their wives grew up with them. So they didn't have to look too far. Roberts, Smith, Campanas, and Sanders, etc.

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, Tangy Bee said:

This is true, but don't forget just about all their wives grew up with them. So they didn't have to look too far. Roberts, Smith, Campanas, and Sanders, etc.

I will say that I think the Roberts kids are really different from the Mortons though. And I’m still surprised Campbell signed up for that kind of life. While her brother is getting married in Scotland this year. They just seem too pretentious and wanna be hipsters to want to live on the Morton farm and pop out babiesleft and right. And that’s why I wonder if Campbell not being pregnant yet was actually planned.

[formergothardite]

5 hours ago, kmachete14 said:

I think these Bates boys want a girl who wears jeans, and is funny and outspoken, has some education, and cares about having cute hair, and likes to do fun hobby things like skiing and hiking etc., but then can't comprehend how those girls aren't going to suddenly become meek, humble, give up their body for 10 kids, and stop doing fun activities to be perpetually pregnant. 

I agree. The Bates sons want a woman that doesn't exist. She has to be pretty and dress trendy, but also willing to conform to what they want, like Nathan and his weird ideas about hair. She has to be educated, but not too educated. Likes doing whatever activities the Bates son likes to do, but can't be better than him. Has to be willing to have her life put on display for reality TV. Can be outspoken, but also also to always agree with them. She will be expected to marry and immediately start popping out baby after baby but also maintain her figure and look cute for social media. 

On top of always appearing like they are self-absorbed jerks, the Bates sons don't have a lot going on for them career wise outside of reality TV. They really aren't a good catch for any fundie maiden. It seems like as these women really get to know they Bates sons, they run away. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

6 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

On top of always appearing like they are self-absorbed jerks, the Bates sons don't have a lot going on for them career wise outside of reality TV. They really aren't a good catch for any fundie maiden.

Whatever happened to the tree trimming/landscaping business?  Seems like that could have been lucrative and expanded as the sons got old enough to participate, if they so chose.  Did they stop doing that?

[formergothardite]

58 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Whatever happened to the tree trimming/landscaping business?  Seems like that could have been lucrative and expanded as the sons got old enough to participate, if they so chose.  Did they stop doing that?

Gil always kept  short hours for his tree business so I never got the impression it was huge to begin with. Their FB page hasn't been updated since 2013. The most recent review was from a Bates son-in-law and the other most recent review said they refused to respond. I know they have shown the tree business in the show but I wonder how much it is real. 

A son could take over the business and make a good amount of money, but it doesn't seem like any of the sons have done that. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

43 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

Gil always kept  short hours for his tree business so I never got the impression it was huge to begin with. Their FB page hasn't been updated since 2013. The most recent review was from a Bates son-in-law and the other most recent review said they refused to respond. I know they have shown the tree business in the show but I wonder how much it is real. 

A son could take over the business and make a good amount of money, but it doesn't seem like any of the sons have done that. 

They don’t want to do manual labor if they can just appear on the show, advertise products on instagram, sell dresses, take missioncations, ride in the Dixie Stampede, and record songs.

[Perrierwithlemon]

Wow, just caught up on all this. I think it was a good thing that they broke up. Remember when we first found out about Chaney and her Instagram before she deleted a bunch of posts that violated the Bates' modesty standards? Yeah, I think it's always a bit of a red-flag when you have to change who you are in order to make a relationship work. I hope Chaney will end up with someone who will let her dress how she wants. 

[singsingsing]

I think it’s really interesting/telling that all of the Bates boys who have courted so far have had broken courtships. Only Zach has had a successful relationship, and he and Whitney obviously broke/ignored many of the courtship rules (even though they tried to double down after the fact, their relationship did not have a ‘courtship’ beginning).

I think the Bates boys are attracted to more “liberal” (extremely relative term) girls, but once these girls realize what reality awaits them, they nope the fuck out. Smart.

[fluffernutter]

28 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

I think the Bates boys are attracted to more “liberal” (extremely relative term) girls, but once these girls realize what reality awaits them, they nope the fuck out. Smart.

And yet the boys act like they are the best catches in the world. ?

[Perrierwithlemon]

I'm intrigued by these Bates boys and their failed courtships. I would watch a documentary about them. They come across as having massive egos online and on their shows, but I wonder what they actually think about themselves in their everyday lives -- the parts that aren't on camera. And what do their ex-girlfriends and everyday acquaintances think of them? Do these boys ever think that they might need to change after their courtships don't work? Or do they really think it's the girl's fault? I wish there was a person who could do a Shane Dawson-style documentary to serve us some fundie-realness. I just have so many questions for them.

As a single woman in my 20s, I would NEVER court/date/whatever-you-want-to-call-it any of these self-proclaimed-mamma's-boys, but I would want to meet with them and get to know what they're really like and hear their stories. What are their secret lives? What do they do all day since they aren't in school and don't work? etc. Not in a leg-humping way, but in a journalistic way.

Edited February 9, 2020 by Perrierwithlemon
typo

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 minutes ago, Perrierwithlemon said:

I'm intrigued by these Bates boys and their failed courtships. I would watch a documentary about them. I they come across as having massive egos online and on their shows, but I wonder what they actually think about themselves in their everyday lives -- the parts that aren't on camera. And what do their ex-girlfriends and everyday acquaintances think of them? Do these boys ever think that they might need to change after their courtships don't work? Or do they really think it's the girl's fault? I wish there was a person who could do a Shane Dawson-style documentary to serve us some fundie-realness. I just have so many questions for them.

As a single women in my 20s, I would NEVER court/date/whatever-you-want-to-call-it any of these self-proclaimed-mamma's-boys, but I would want to meet with them and get to know what they're really like and hear their stories. Not in a leg-humping way, but in a journalistic way.

I’ve dated true mama’s boys. And it was disasterous. I don’t recommend it to anyone. 

[MaryOrMartha]

On 2/5/2020 at 9:52 AM, formergothardite said:

I agree. The Bates sons want a woman that doesn't exist. She has to be pretty and dress trendy, but also willing to conform to what they want, like Nathan and his weird ideas about hair. She has to be educated, but not too educated. Likes doing whatever activities the Bates son likes to do, but can't be better than him. Has to be willing to have her life put on display for reality TV. Can be outspoken, but also also to always agree with them. She will be expected to marry and immediately start popping out baby after baby but also maintain her figure and look cute for social media. 

On top of always appearing like they are self-absorbed jerks, the Bates sons don't have a lot going on for them career wise outside of reality TV. They really aren't a good catch for any fundie maiden. It seems like as these women really get to know they Bates sons, they run away. 

They exist alright, it's just that the happen to be their sisters.

Would the Bates visit the Duggar family and vice versa and see what is available in their areas? There may not be someone in TN for the Bates but maybe Kendra or Lauren Duggar has a friend or sister suitable?

[clueliss]

We've seen the Bateseses boys (Nathan and Lawson in particular) hanging at the Duggar compound repeatedly.  They've had those opportunities.  Also Nathan was in Hattiesburg MS for quite some time for his flying.  (also the Duggars still have several boys to marry off and may want the local female fundie population for that)

[Thorns]

Many is the relationship that has been canceled on account of relatives. 

(Or something like that). I would not be surprised if the girls after some time and consideration finds that the package deal Bates Boy, Bates Clan and Bates Show both on and off media is too much for comfort. Their way of living is my introvert nightmare, and might possible be enough in itself for me to cancel a life long commitment, no matter how much I liked the boy. 

[Kelsey]

IME, if the man you're seeing tells you he's a "Mama's Boy," run and never look back!

[Belugaloo]

On 2/3/2020 at 7:56 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

I suppose it’s possible that the Bates boys tend to go after girls that are all wrong for them. Ashley was 100% wrong for Nathan. I’m still amazed that he went after her. She is a city girl through and through. There’s no way she would have been happy in the middle of nowhere Tennessee. Chaney might have been all wrong for Trace too. These Bates boys need to go after fundie girls who actually want to live in TN, possibly film their entire relationship, and get pregnant every other year. I have a suspicion that they aren’t doing that. 

Not to sound like a total dick- but I tend to think the Duggar boys have pursued girls in "their league" while the Bates' men seem to be pursuing girls out of their league. and maybe that has something to do with the inevitable ending. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

6 minutes ago, Belugaloo said:

Not to sound like a total dick- but I tend to think the Duggar boys have pursued girls in "their league" while the Bates' men seem to be pursuing girls out of their league. and maybe that has something to do with the inevitable ending. 

If you're talking about looks, only in the fundieverse would Kendra give a guy like Joe a second glance.  Lauren is also significantly better looking than Josiah.  

I'd agree with you on Anna and Abbie - far more closely matched looks wise to their spouses.

Or were you talking about something else?

[Belugaloo]

2 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

If you're talking about looks, only in the fundieverse would Kendra give a guy like Joe a second glance.  Lauren is also significantly better looking than Josiah.  

I'd agree with you on Anna and Abbie - far more closely matched looks wise to their spouses.

Or were you talking about something else?

honestly, I haven't kept up with the bates much, but I was referring to personality. With Lauren and Kendra, who I agree are both beautiful, I think their personality is in line with the Duggars. From what I know, it doesnt seem like Marjorie Jackson or Chaneys personality line up with the Bates or Duggars so it makes sense that their relationship ended. 

 

I also agree with Anna and Abbie hitting the mark on both looks and personality. And I dont mean that to sound rude- I think they are both attractive women. The difference is that they dont pack on the makeup and have a natural beauty to them, which seems more in line with the Duggar personality. Can you imagine John with a girl who spends an hour contouring her makeup?  it looks like Chaney is very fashionable and likely knows how to countour her makeup (nothing wrong with that at all- just different from what I would think would fit in with the personalities of the bates/duggar brand!) 

[Perrierwithlemon]

Summary for reference (feel free to add any information or opinions):

Successes:

• Whitney - fundie-lite,* needed a close-knit family
• Anna - devout fundie, idolized Michelle Duggar
• Kendra - devout fundie, pro-mega-family
• Lauren - devout fundie, seems to only want to be a mother
• Abbie - gave up carrier for starting a family, seems fairly centered in the devout fundie/fundie-lite spectrum

Failures:

•  Majorie (Jackson) - fundie-lite
•  Zach's failed courtship which I know nothing about
•  Ashley - fundie-lite 
•  Lawson's speculated "heartbreak" (which has supposedly inspired some of his songs?)
•  Chaney - fundie-lite

I imagine that for young women marrying into the Duggar family is like marrying royalty. The Duggars are celebrities in their sphere/bubble. The Bates boys, while having better hairlines, have less fame than the Duggars. I'm speculating that Zach originally courted a devout fundie under traditional courtship rules. He ended up with someone who seems somewhat fundie-lite while simultaneously embracing the Bates-sisterhood. That's quite a different pattern. 

*I'm using "fundie-lite" loosely to mean that they have a career outside of being a stay-at-home-mom and wear pants.

[Smoochie]

On 2/8/2020 at 4:40 PM, singsingsing said:

.. they nope the fuck out

This! 

I think a big difference from Zack to the older boys now, is the TV show. They were much more humble in the beginning.  Seeing how shy Zack was, to the way the boys act now, especially on Instagram is night and day.  Other than some of their beliefs, which are horrific, they are 'of the world' which many Evangelical Christians deride.

Kelly & Gil are so hypocritical as to the way their children were/are treated.  Women are controlled with their strict morality & 'modesty', while her boys other than Zack, have really had none of that and are complete douche canoes who think their opinion is all that!  The fact that not one of them holds a steady job or has the potential income to support a family, plus with all the broken relationships, it seems the girls are fundie lite & expect their husband to have a job/life. 

The strength of their old convictions are clearly wavering from the older to children to those being raised now and, again, I think it's their exposure on TV & influence from social media.

 

Edited February 10, 2020 by Smoochie
the bit re jobs

[JermajestyDuggar]

Remember when I said Hannah Wissmann would be a much better match for Trace? Look who is right in the middle if this picture!  I’m sure he won’t take my advice. He will probably go after another girl that’s wrong for him. 

[GreyhoundFan]

3 hours ago, Perrierwithlemon said:

 Zach's failed courtship which I know nothing about

That courtship was with Sarah Reith, who is a musician with her family's group.  Zack's courtship proposal was featured on an episode of 19 Kids. It's worth digging up for the cringe factor. She looked like she was hoping the earth would open up and swallow her. Zack also had a massive case of the sweats and had to keep mopping his face.