Alyssa & John 3: Modesty Make-Up

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, just_ordinary said:

In the end it doesn’t matter what Alyssa learned from her parents about it. Only Johns opinion truly matters. He is her headship and that includes spiritual leadership as well. 

Now, I hope (and to some extent believe) that her opinion matters too but I am not sure if she even has one apart from his. She was raised to follow. 

I’d put my money on John’s opinion before I would her parents’ opinions. With John there might be some hope of a logical decision, with Gil and Kelly we all know better.

[TheRadleyPorch]

Ok what someone tell me about Jill’s “I love sex” comment—something besides her sex advice blog post?? It’s very time consuming to keep up with the Dillard thread! 

[VelociRapture]

5 hours ago, TheRadleyPorch said:

Ok what someone tell me about Jill’s “I love sex” comment—something besides her sex advice blog post?? It’s very time consuming to keep up with the Dillard thread! 

As far as I know the blog post is the only time she’s really discussed sex. I’m pretty sure that comment was made in the blog post. 

[nickelodeon]

7 hours ago, TheRadleyPorch said:

Ok what someone tell me about Jill’s “I love sex” comment—something besides her sex advice blog post?? It’s very time consuming to keep up with the Dillard thread! 

Sex is created by god!!! ❤️

[OyToTheVey]

40 minutes ago, nickelodeon said:

Sex is created by god!!! ❤️

And here I thought it was about 10,000 nerve endings being stimulated at the same time. IDK what I was thinking.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

2 hours ago, nickelodeon said:

Sex is created by god!!! ❤️

My mom always said it was one of God’s greatest gifts to mankind.

maybe that’s why I indulged so much in my wilder youth...it’s jist rude to reject a gift!!

[Iamtheway]

On 6/14/2019 at 8:48 PM, just_ordinary said:

In the end it doesn’t matter what Alyssa learned from her parents about it. Only Johns opinion truly matters. He is her headship and that includes spiritual leadership as well. 

Now, I hope (and to some extent believe) that her opinion matters too but I am not sure if she even has one apart from his. She was raised to follow. 

I really hope he wouldn’t make her take the pill if he’s ok with it but she believes it is basically the same as murdering babies. That would be horrible for her.

I hope they all value her life enough to listen to her doctors and that they are preventing pregnancies if that’s what the doctors recommend but I wouldn’t be sure they are not still ”leaving it up to god”. 

If they are though they should also have left fixing her heartcondition up to god. If pregnancy is god’s will, then so is that. 

[Hisey]

Alyssa commented in her insta yesterday that she is not pregnant (the Bates wikipedia had erroneously said she was due in August!)

[19tacos&counting]

I hope they are practicing some SERIOUS nfp, meaning charting ovulation sticks, and completelyyyyy avoid any fertile time, or even condoms. Alyssa needs to get her heart condition under control and let her body rest for at least 6+ months before she even considers getting pregnant. I truly hope we don’t see a pregnancy announcement from the Webster’s until 2020 

[llucie]

11 hours ago, Hisey said:

Alyssa commented in her insta yesterday that she is not pregnant (the Bates wikipedia had erroneously said she was due in August!)

She has denied being pregnant 3 times in the last month. Maybe its time for people to believe her.

[Hisey]

1 hour ago, llucie said:

She has denied being pregnant 3 times in the last month. Maybe its time for people to believe her.

Why are her followers so desperate for a pregnancy? She posrs plenty of pics of her three cuties. 

[fluffernutter]

On 6/22/2019 at 12:46 PM, Hisey said:

Why are her followers so desperate for a pregnancy? She posrs plenty of pics of her three cuties. 

Exactly. Plus her health condition! I can't even imagine wanting someone to go through a pregnancy directly after a heart issue. Their obsession with churning out precious blessings is not only ridiculous, it's dangerous. I so hope her and her husband listen to her doctor if he did in fact tell them to not get pregnant. Here's hoping someone has some damn common sense. 

[SassyPants]

I think most of these people pining for her or any of them to be PG are young, immature fan girls. People who think that having a baby is like playing with dolls. A small minority might be part of the no birth control or you will go to hell crowd. They don’t want AW or JW to be going to hell. 

[AmericanRose]

Well, if anyone is wondering about the fundie-ness of Alyssa, her father's day tribute to John called him (among other things), "our leader" and "our protector". Of course, maybe it's normal for women to think of their husbands as their protectors? ?‍♀️

I am quietly amazed by how she can find matching everything for her daughters.

Edited June 24, 2019 by AmericanRose

[VelociRapture]

1 hour ago, AmericanRose said:

Well, if anyone is wondering about the fundie-ness of Alyssa, her father's day tribute to John called him (among other things), "our leader" and "our protector". Of course, maybe it's normal for women to think of their husbands as their protectors? ?‍♀️

I am quietly amazed by how she can find matching everything for her daughters.

The protector in my house depends on the situation, which of us is dealing with more anxiety at the time, and whether our 30 pound beagle mix with the oversized bark feels like protecting us or having us protect her. But we’re just sinful heathens. Not super Jesus fans like Alyssa and John. 

[nickelodeon]

1 hour ago, AmericanRose said:

Well, if anyone is wondering about the fundie-ness of Alyssa, her father's day tribute to John called him (among other things), "our leader" and "our protector". Of course, maybe it's normal for women to think of their husbands as their protectors? ?‍♀️

I am quietly amazed by how she can find matching everything for her daughters.

"Every child has a HERO. We call ours DADDY." Why is she including herself as one of John's kids, or did I just miss the post where she talks about her daddy dom kink?

[HerNameIsBuffy]

4 minutes ago, nickelodeon said:

"Every child has a HERO. We call ours DADDY." Why is she including herself as one of John's kids, or did I just miss the post where she talks about her daddy dom kink?

I know you were kidding but I’ve long thought this type of dynamic is D/s based for many (not all) of the participants.

and the way their raise their kids they are trying to deliberately embed it I to their sexualities, whether they realize it or not.

im all for people having whatever kind of private relationships they like, but don’t involve unsuspecting people in your kink.  

[Melissa1977]

14 hours ago, AmericanRose said:

Well, if anyone is wondering about the fundie-ness of Alyssa, her father's day tribute to John called him (among other things), "our leader" and "our protector". Of course, maybe it's normal for women to think of their husbands as their protectors? ?‍♀️

I am quietly amazed by how she can find matching everything for her daughters.

I really dislike these comments. But it's not only fundies who talk that way. It's a obnoxious trend in social networks! Couples write over-sugared comments about their boyfriend/girlfriend, daddies are heroes, moms are hot and kids are the cherry on the top. 

Alyssa pushes patriarchy and it's bad for her daugthers' emotional development. But I suppose she is sincere when praises John. He works and looks after the girls and seems to be a caring husband. When Alyssa praises John, is she just parroting fundie ideas, or comparing John to Gil and realising how lucky she is? I think Erin acts similar, like if she couldn't believe how good her husband is. 

[Melissa1977]

On 6/22/2019 at 6:46 PM, Hisey said:

Why are her followers so desperate for a pregnancy? She posrs plenty of pics of her three cuties. 

I think that some people has a confusion between reality and fiction when it comes to a person in the screen. They want action, and in the Bates *series*, action means babies. It's like they don't understand what a heart surgery means, or just imagine it's an episode and on the next one she'll be healed. Also babies/toddlers are hard work, but as Alyssa looks always so groomed and smiley, those fans may think that it's easy to add more and more babies.

It's shocking how FJingerites are more concerned about Alyssa's health than some of her fans. 

[Flossie]

I think a lot of the leghumpers don't actually think of these people as being real people.  Sure, they're told that these are real people just living their everyday life in front of cameras, and they're encouraged to believe it.  They think they really know these people.  The Bates family are attractive, on TV, and not hiding behind walled mansions and bodyguards.  Viewers can tune in regularly to see what they're doing and are privy to totally not staged conversations and asides to the camera.  They have Facebook pages, Instagram's, and whatever else, where they post stuff and reply to questions from their friends and family, just like real people do.

But at the same time, they see notices from other fans and TLC that the Bateses are 'shooting again for the next season'.  The Bates themselves post reminders to watch the show, shill products, and sometimes talk about making appearances at (carefully selected) religious events.  Sometimes their posts look like attempts to keep the fans engaged between seasons or efforts to cultivate a faux personal relationship with their audience.  

The line gets blurred.  They're obviously not Hollywood type celebrities, but they're not just a large family doing their thing and sharing it with just a few people that they actually know.

I think the fans think they have the perfect meld of movie stars as their person friends.  They're used to watching shows with obvious story lines and a shtick to hook their target audience, but they also somehow seem to think that none of this is planned in advance and it's just like things just happen to happen when Uncle Harold is standing there with his camcorder.  But then again, it's a show, and a show needs something new to happen to keep things going.  With the Bates (and the Duggars), it's courtships, marriages, and kids.  Someone has a health issue?  That was good for an episode or two, but now it's time to forget that and get back to the business at hand.  Have another baby.  We don't have enough cast members yet.  We'll never have enough cast members, because if we stopped adding them, we'd find out the whole bunch is actually pretty boring.

[Palimpsest]

5 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

I really dislike these comments. But it's not only fundies who talk that way. It's a obnoxious trend in social networks! Couples write over-sugared comments about their boyfriend/girlfriend, daddies are heroes, moms are hot and kids are the cherry on the top. 

Alyssa pushes patriarchy and it's bad for her daugthers' emotional development. But I suppose she is sincere when praises John. He works and looks after the girls and seems to be a caring husband. When Alyssa praises John, is she just parroting fundie ideas, or comparing John to Gil and realising how lucky she is? I think Erin acts similar, like if she couldn't believe how good her husband is. 

True.  In psychology it is called illusory superiority.  Overestimating one's abilities and qualities in comparison to others.  It is thought to be culture and population based and seems particularly prominent in the US.  It also runs rampant in Fundiedom. 

Also known as the Lake Wobegon Effect:  "Where all the mommies are exceptional, all the daddies are heroes, and all the children more perfect and Godly than yours."

@Flossie, excellent and very perceptive post.  Thank you. 

I'd add that this is not necessarily limited to their fans, or that some of their fans have become lost and wandered onto Free Jinger at times.  They really think they know these people.  And the boundaries between "real" and "the show" are very blurred in their minds.

I've had (now former) posters swear to me that X didn't happen because Michelle Duggar said Y on the show.  We had one fangirl argue for ages that of course <name that Bates> was no longer Fundie or  Gothardite because there were no photos of them at Big Sandy.  Uh, absence of evidence ≠ evidence of absence.  

And it is not as though the Duggars and Bateses haven't lied either. There are some big lies by omission (like about Josh's history of molestations) and there are numerous other little lies and misrepresentations.  

Whether it is primarily to disguise their faith, or to maintain some semblance of privacy, or whether they are asked to misrepresent timelines and keep secrets by producers of the show for story-lines is unclear.  Perhaps it is all of the above. 

We know though that both the Duggars and Bateses have deliberately tried to hide their links to Gothard and IBLP. 

Kelly Jo is particularly skilled at misrepresentation.  My favorite examples are morphing the Gothard birthday cake into a groom's cake, and Kelly Jo posting pictures of vacationing with Gil at Niagara Falls.   Smoke and mirrors.  That very same week Gil and Kelly were standing on the stage at Big Sandy preaching to the flock.  Up to their necks in IBLP poison.

They are real people.  But we don't get a real picture of who they are and what their activities are from the sanitised and prettied up version on the show.

 

[Shouldabeenacowboy]

6 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

They are real people.  But we don't get a real picture of who they are and what their activities are from the sanitised and prettied up version on the show.

I assume nothing in any reality show (not just the Bates, Duggars, etc.) is...reality. 

I also assume that whatever people post on social medial is maybe 50% of the whole story. 

I take both of the above for their entertainment value - or snark factor. 

[JanasTattooParlor]

Alyssa is on her Instagram story saying how her girls are so temperamental and asking how she is going to deal with teenage drama. The pics she uses don’t really show anything dramatic other than Zoey crying with a caption that she’s the boss. I hate that she’s reinforcing these stereotypes that girls are emotional and dramatic when her girls are toddlers. Toddlers are dramatic, it doesn’t matter if they’re male or female. 

Edited June 25, 2019 by JanasTattooParlor

[19tacos&counting]

In her defense, the girls may be wild and crazy and sassy and scream and yell.  Just none of this is posted on her picture perfect Instagram. I’m not even close to an influencer and I normally post pictures of my two young boys smiling, arms around each other, swimming, or general doing something fun/sweet. But make no mistake my boys are extremely high energy and wild boys. 

Her girls do seems pretty chill, but just because we don’t see certain things in her extremely polished social media image, doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen behind closed doors 

[CarrotCake]

Alyssa emphasizes a lot on her instagram that she still has health issues, I have the feeling she does this also to try to avoid getting too many 'are you pregnant yet?' comments.