Joy and Austin 26: Please Wear the Appropriate Footgear Around Horses

[nickelodeon]

Babyface & More? & More?? What else could possibly be in there?

[BachelorToTheRapture]

1 hour ago, nickelodeon said:

Babyface & More? & More?? What else could possibly be in there?

Baby arms, baby butt, baby dinosaur...you never know

[Cheetah]

9 hours ago, singsingsing said:

Where are my fellow Gryffindors?!

Me!  At least, that's what the Pottermore site put me in when I took the test.  I kind of think I'm more of a Ravenclaw, but it's all for fun so sure.  And since MB is just for fun, too, I'll share that the last time I took it (online, but a longer online version) I got ISTP, which is actually Harry Potter himself on the "which Harry Potter character goes with your Myers Briggs type" chart.  

[Glasgowghirl]

9 hours ago, singsingsing said:

Where are my fellow Gryffindors?!

I'm a Gryffindor

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

Gryffindor here as well.  I've done the MB test in classes but I don't remember what I am. 

 

[Iamtheway]

On 5/6/2019 at 8:22 PM, medimus said:

i wonder this too. Of course it is possible that all three of them don't use anything and things just worked out that way. But it would be unusual for such young women to take a year (or more) to get pregnant.

Oh @medimus you heathen! If you believe in Jesus the right way he will guide the sperm in to the egg at the right time. So if you want to wait a year you just pray the right way and then you can go at it like bunny rabbits without getting pregnant. And if you do get pregnant at the wrong time you or your husband obviously sinned. Shame on you!

[StraightOuttaArkansas]

12 hours ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

weird that they would do one at only 10 weeks at a place like that. I thought that was more of a thing trying to get good 3/D pics of the baby. 

Where I live (Northern Ireland) it is not really odd at all to go that early to a boutique place. They don't do anything to actually establish you are pregnant until 12 weeks here (including see you and make sure you know basic pregnancy health and safety?). I was so nervous that we had one done at 9 weeks just to make sure for ourselves, it was not expensive and really basic "yep it is there, looks good, here is a due date estimate that will probably change at your 12 week one". We didn't tell anyone or actually ever show the picture, but it gave me peace of mind and I ended up not getting my appointment until almost 13 weeks (I swear the whole country was having babies last May). It is also common to make a second trip to one to find out the sex of the baby. I never got the full reason explained to me, but they refuse to tell you even if they know at your official 20 week (?) scan, which I found to be an uncomfortable thought, a stranger knowing something about my baby that I am not "allowed" to know. I get that it has to do with possibly being wrong, but still, sometimes it is painfully obvious. I heard a lot in my baby group that other parts of the UK are similar, but I think it might be a bit extreme here. Just another perspective.

[Ivycoveredtower]

4 hours ago, StraightOuttaArkansas said:

Where I live (Northern Ireland) it is not really odd at all to go that early to a boutique place. They don't do anything to actually establish you are pregnant until 12 weeks here (including see you and make sure you know basic pregnancy health and safety?). I was so nervous that we had one done at 9 weeks just to make sure for ourselves, it was not expensive and really basic "yep it is there, looks good, here is a due date estimate that will probably change at your 12 week one". We didn't tell anyone or actually ever show the picture, but it gave me peace of mind and I ended up not getting my appointment until almost 13 weeks (I swear the whole country was having babies last May). It is also common to make a second trip to one to find out the sex of the baby. I never got the full reason explained to me, but they refuse to tell you even if they know at your official 20 week (?) scan, which I found to be an uncomfortable thought, a stranger knowing something about my baby that I am not "allowed" to know. I get that it has to do with possibly being wrong, but still, sometimes it is painfully obvious. I heard a lot in my baby group that other parts of the UK are similar, but I think it might be a bit extreme here. Just another perspective.

I have heard in some parts of the world they won't tell you because certain groups only want one Gender (Usually boy) and will abort a girl if they find out early enough. 

[Glasgowghirl]

5 minutes ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

I have heard in some parts of the world they won't tell you because certain groups only want one Gender (Usually boy) and will abort a girl if they find out early enough. 

Here in Lanarkshire for brief time, the NHS had stopped telling people the gender because a few families had threatened to sue them for being wrong. It didn't last long and they now make clear that they can be wrong, I know a few people that it's happened with.

Finding out at those boutique places does still happen here if the person goes to their scan and they can't tell the sex people will then pay to find out. A lot of people still don't find out here.

[medimus]

43 minutes ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

I have heard in some parts of the world they won't tell you because certain groups only want one Gender (Usually boy) and will abort a girl if they find out early enough. 

Unlikely to be the case for Northern Ireland though, as abortion is still illegal there.

It might be a combination of fear of being sued if wrong and saving time (and therefore money) for the NHS. Looking for the sex might only take a few minutes, but a few minutes means you could probably do an entire extra scan for every ten you do, so multiple per day. I know lots of places charge for pictures as well (because that is not a medical need and they can and it is a very welcome source of income for the NHS).

 

[nolongerIFBx]

On 5/4/2019 at 11:54 AM, twoandthrough said:

Speaking of personalities... has anyone figured out their Enneagram? I saw it going around on Instagram and quickly wanted to know mine, so I took a bunch of tests and did some readings. I'm a solid 2 (the Helper), which correlates with my ESFJ Myers-Briggs. I don't know why these all fascinate me so much, but is has caused a great deal of introspection and helped me work out some issues I deal with within myself. 

I did it years ago and I think it has changed because some people talking about it now are posting numbers? Anyway, I was a Romantic and a Realist which I was told wasn't possible because your two top traits are supposed to be next to each other. This is actually very common for me on personality tests. I have a fantasy of how life could be and spend some time there mentally but I'm too practical to visit for long. My auto-response (which I have tempered to spare feelings) to those "some-day-my-prince-will-come"posts is to point out that there are more women than men so don't count on it. Go live your life.

 

ETA: I found the numbers: I was 4 and 9.

Edited May 8, 2019 by nolongerIFBx

[LoonyLovegood]

My first post on a Duggar thread... funny, because the Duggars are what brought me here to lurk for years. 

Anyhow, I wanted to chime in on the MBTI discussion. I’m a therapist. We did learn about the MBTI in my grad program and there are definitely different camps within psychology about the assessment. My professor for Clinical Appraisal (the class where you learn about all kinds of formal clinical assessments), said he didn’t put much stock into it, except for possible use in marriage counseling (he works only with children, lol). I had other professors who loved it. We had to take the official assessment for one of my classes as a way to gain more insight about ourselves and who we were as therapists. Personally, I like the MBTI as a tool to understand yourself and how you interact with the world, but it is not a diagnostic sort of assessment. I may have used it with 2 clients ever and these were adolescents who were doing some identity work as well as wondering about possible career paths. I think it can be helpful as long as it is not looked at as deterministic. 

I’m an INFJ, a 9 on the enneagram, and a Hufflepuff.

And on topic, my suspicion is that Jill may have been using some sort of NFP prior to conceiving Sam, and possibly now, but I’m not so sure Joy is. ?‍♀️

Edited May 8, 2019 by LoonyLovegood
Missing words

[Lullu-Beanz]

On 5/6/2019 at 8:05 PM, fluffernutter said:

INFJ and Hufflepuff here. 

I'm also INFJ and Hufflepuff.

[clueliss]

INFJ and no clue what house.

[theotherelise]

• INTJ (have occasionally gotten INFJ)
• Hufflepuff (on retake at age 27, got Gryffindor when I was 22)
• Enneagram 5 (got three different results over multiple testings and finally just picked the one I think fits best)
• Strengths: Strategic, Ideation, Restorative, Individualization, Input
• On DISC, I get 51% dominance, 21% influence, 16% compliance, 12% steadiness
• Of the four tendencies, I am a questioner with a rebel streak

I think it's a fun thing to take personality tests. I will say the Strengths Finder and Four Tendencies were most helpful to me in looking at how I can grow positively and how I can mitigate my shortcomings. For instance, I will never be motivated to continue with a new health habit just because I've got an accountabili-buddy for it. I just don't care about doing something unless I find a way to make myself care.

All these tests certainly are affected by how you view yourself and what role you're considering when you take them (employee versus relationship partner versus child/sibling). I've taken all the above tests more than once and never got the same results. I was a gryffindor previously, but then I went through a severe depressive episode and I think that rock bottom during that time was a real turning point for me in how I viewed myself, others, and the world. 

[Italiangirl]

Welcome @LoonyLovegood

[StraightOuttaArkansas]

@Ivycoveredtower Yes of course that could be a concern, but I doubt that is often the case here.

@medimus The abortion issue reaches even further in terms of information. I am a total worrier and like to be prepared. All the other ladies in my group were have the standard tests for the risk of Down's Syndrome and other genetic issues (not older risk categories, women in their 20's and 30's) in the rest of the UK. I was not given these tests and when I finally asked when it would be done (because again, I wanted to make sure I was as prepared as possible for anything that could known in advance, this was a planned for and wanted baby). The nurse told me: "We don't do that in this country. Why would we? It's not like you can abort it." I was floored. I really wanted to scream. Why would anyone assume another person would abort just because of that? If they did, that is still their choice to do so, at a younger age and a less stable life, I can absolutely understand it as an option. On top of that it wasn't even true. I could have flown to another UK country (or now gone to the Republic I think) and had one. They view it as a way to "stop abortion" or paid for a private test, got the information, and done it, though those tests are very expensive. I simply wanted to be able to prepare myself and not be in for a shock of such life changing news at such a vulnerable moment if I COULD know in advance and prepare. Assuming I would not want my baby anymore because they would in some way be different really rubbed me the wrong way.

[J.O.Y.nomore]

1 hour ago, StraightOuttaArkansas said:

Why would anyone assume another person would abort just because of that? If they did, that is still their choice to do so, at a younger age and a less stable life, I can absolutely understand it as an option. On top of that it wasn't even true. I could have flown to another UK country (or now gone to the Republic I think) and had one. They view it as a way to "stop abortion" or paid for a private test, got the information, and done it, though those tests are very expensive. I simply wanted to be able to prepare myself and not be in for a shock of such life changing news at such a vulnerable moment if I COULD know in advance and prepare. Assuming I would not want my baby anymore because they would in some way be different really rubbed me the wrong way.

They probably think that because incidence of Down Syndrome in some places has dramatically decreased as a result of abortion related to prenatal diagnosis. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/down-syndrome-iceland/

[IsmeWeatherwax]

I am from Ulster and I had my 2nd child there in 1998. The only scan you were offered was the 20 week anomaly scan, and they would tell you the sex if they could see it. If the 20 week scan showed any anomalys you were offered a medical termination if that was your wish. If your family had a history of genetic conditions you were able to have scans and testing done much earlier and then the choice was yours to carry on or not with the pregnancy, tho you did have to go Belfast for that as the local hospitals didnt cover that.

My friend wasn't allowed to know to know the sex of her 2 at any of the scans she had, as the policy in Portmouth is not to tell due to some cultures have been known to abort girls as boys are more prized. That was the policy in there in 2002 and 2004.

Where I am, South East, Ive been able to know with babies 1, 3 & 4 at the 20 weeks scans.

[VelociRapture]

This ultrasound discussion is really interesting to me. I’ll be 12 weeks tomorrow and I’ll also be having my fourth ultrasound that same day. The first two ultrasounds were for dating purposes because I have recently diagnosed PCOS and we weren’t sure when I conceived. The third was a surprise, but my Doctor just wanted to be positive Baby was still doing ok. This next one is an optional Nuchal Translucency scan to check for certain genetic conditions - my husband admitted he would be worried if we didn’t do it and we don’t need both of us worrying for weeks until the anatomy scan.

After tomorrow I should get a break from ultrasounds and testing. Once I hit 16 weeks though I’ll start having weekly appointments to measure my cervical length via vaginal ultrasound and a separate weekly appointment to be given my Progesterone shot. That means I’ll be seeing and hearing the baby on a weekly basis until I’m around 30 weeks. This is all due to my last pregnancy ending in an unexplained premature birth at 34 weeks, so most expectant parents here do not have to go through all this during their pregnancies. As far as I know, most expectant mothers get their first scan at their first appointment and then don’t have another until the anatomy scan, unless they opt for a Nuchal Translucency scan between 11 and 13 weeks. I’m not positive about that though because I’ve never been lucky enough to have a “typical” pregnancy. 

[oldfashionedgal]

Where I am the standard scans are the NT scan at 12 weeks abc and anatomy scan at 20 weeks. Most women also get a dating scan somewhere between 6 and 8 weeks, but that not quite standard.

[AprilQuilt]

On 5/8/2019 at 10:28 AM, StraightOuttaArkansas said:

Where I live (Northern Ireland) it is not really odd at all to go that early to a boutique place. They don't do anything to actually establish you are pregnant until 12 weeks here (including see you and make sure you know basic pregnancy health and safety?). I was so nervous that we had one done at 9 weeks just to make sure for ourselves, it was not expensive and really basic "yep it is there, looks good, here is a due date estimate that will probably change at your 12 week one". We didn't tell anyone or actually ever show the picture, but it gave me peace of mind and I ended up not getting my appointment until almost 13 weeks (I swear the whole country was having babies last May). It is also common to make a second trip to one to find out the sex of the baby. I never got the full reason explained to me, but they refuse to tell you even if they know at your official 20 week (?) scan, which I found to be an uncomfortable thought, a stranger knowing something about my baby that I am not "allowed" to know. I get that it has to do with possibly being wrong, but still, sometimes it is painfully obvious. I heard a lot in my baby group that other parts of the UK are similar, but I think it might be a bit extreme here. Just another perspective.

yep, here in England I paid for a scan at 9 weeks. My booking-in appointment with the community midwives wasn't til 11 weeks (even though I'd called them up with the pee barely dry on the stick), but I'd had previous miscarriages and was just climbing the walls for reassurance I wasn't imagining it, there was a baby in there and it was OK. I just dreaded going to the official 12-week NHS scan and there being no heartbeat.

That little shrimp is now 10 weeks old and firmly attached to my boob as I type, so it worked out OK, but I loved my scans and at the beginning of pregnancy when everything feels so surreal and uncertain they are quite special. I'd have had one every week if I could afford it. OTOH, I don't think I'd ever have a later 3D scan, it always looks like the baby's made of porridge.

[SassyPantswithASideofClass]

On ‎5‎/‎8‎/‎2019 at 7:25 AM, Ivycoveredtower said:

I have heard in some parts of the world they won't tell you because certain groups only want one Gender (Usually boy) and will abort a girl if they find out early enough. 

Originally from the continent of Asia. In my country at one time, boys are valued way more than girls. I am not sure if that is still the same now in 2019. From what I have been told, girls in my country can be sold into slavery, become child brides, or are sex trafficked (especially if the family is poor)

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

2 hours ago, oldfashionedgal said:

Where I am the standard scans are the NT scan at 12 weeks abc and anatomy scan at 20 weeks. Most women also get a dating scan somewhere between 6 and 8 weeks, but that not quite standard.

Man, when I had my kids my insurance didn't pay for ANY u/s unless something warranted it,  With my 1st they did an u/s at 9 weeks to confirm my dude date, they did them weather insurance covered it or not, I wasn't charged for it since it was just quick in office scan, they were a big OB office that had 9 doctors and 2 midwives, so they had 2 u/s machines. My 2nd baby I went back to my preferred OB who was in his own practice so I didn't get an u/s until 32 weeks when I started bleeding, this was 21 & 19 years ago so I'm guessing standards have changed, or at least I hope they have, but knowing the state of insurance in the US, if you have shitty insurance, like we've always had you don't get the greatest care because you can't afford it. 

[CarrotCake]

On 5/6/2019 at 9:17 AM, medimus said:

Myers-Brigg is very american, I've never seen it mentioned outside of an american context, which is intriguing, because the way we think about personality/what is normal is very culturally bound as well. I think I remember something about there being five major personality axes, of which introversion-extroversion is one (can't remember the others).

I live in Europe and I know it as well. I have also seen it coming up in conversations where multiple people knew which personality they were, so definitely not only American.

I am INFP, fiance is ISTP. According to this graph we should not work together.