Dillards 70: Their Behavior Is Always Pretty Weird

[Carm_88]

1 minute ago, church_of_dog said:

Interesting!  Do you ever regret fast decisions?

No, I treat it like a multiple choice test. I normally go with my gut reaction. Multiple choice really thought me the problems with over analyzing things. My psychology professor pointed out that most people on our first midterm had the right the answer and then went back and changed it. I am more likely to have regret if I spend too much time thinking about it and second guessing myself, my mind will always go back to the "What if I chose that one?" If I make a fast decision, I'm generally happy.

[EmmieJ]

15 hours ago, Cheetah said:

Then the Cal State System is the next tier down, although these days a couple of the Cal States (Cal Poly SLO most notably) are harder to get into than some of the UCs.

I graduated from Cal Poly SLO years ago - and even then, it was hard to get into college there.  I didn't get accepted to Cal Poly at first, so did my first year at a smaller State college, then applied to transfer to Cal Poly at year's end.  At that time, it was a bit easier to get in as a transfer student.  Even then, certain programs were extremely tight - engineering for one; business admin was another. 

3 hours ago, Carm_88 said:

Jill doesn't have enough education to teach the boys and any future kids well enough for them to get into university. There's no way. Unless Derick is going to take over for the high school years, we know that Jill didn't learn biology, physics, chemistry, calculus, English at a high school level, etc. So I'm not sure how that would be possible.

Hopefully Derick will realize Jill's limitations as far as educating their children, and at least agree to hire tutors once they tackle the more difficult subjects.  That's presuming he'll actually be earning an income by that point.

[Lisafer]

32 minutes ago, OyToTheVey said:

I have a Master's in Special Education, birth to 2nd grade. There's no way in hell I would be able to tutor or home school anyone in math or science beyond simple stuff like a gravity project( I have a whole lesson on that, it involves making parachutes, kids love it) anyway, I doubt any Duggar is capable of proper home school. Especially now with common core. I look at my best friends kids homework and it makes me want to cry. None of it makes sense.

I'm homeschooling my 7-year-old. Common Core Math brings me so much freaking joy! Weird, I know, but it makes so much more sense than the way I was educated with rote memorization (I was homeschooled with Saxon Math). All the numbers coming apart, being rearranged so they can be added together and you can see WHY it's happening; it's amazing. 

[OyToTheVey]

7 minutes ago, Lisafer said:

I'm homeschooling my 7-year-old. Common Core Math brings me so much freaking joy! Weird, I know, but it makes so much more sense than the way I was educated with rote memorization (I was homeschooled with Saxon Math). All the numbers coming apart, being rearranged so they can be added together and you can see WHY it's happening; it's amazing. 

Oh man the first time I saw the phrase "what double numbers..." I had the biggest WTF am I reading moment. I still have trouble wrapping my mind around that.

[Georgiana]

I think Jill is just fine intelligence wise.  Do I think she would succeed in higher academia?  No.  But I think that's because she not only LACKS critical thinking skills, but is also AFRAID of thinking critically.  Jill Duggar Dillard seems to be terrified of branching out or in any way criticizing her parents or their belief system.  Even though I do believe she has the intelligence to learn to think critically (and likely very quickly, she's never struck me as a slow learner! In fact, she learns incredibly quickly how to please people, so she can be a fast learner when motivated), I believe she would be unwilling to engage in anything that might lead her to draw conclusions she is interested in avoiding.  But who knows, maybe Derick's law school classes will show her it's not so bad to be critical.

As for homeschooling, I think that Jill's homeschooling would likely be a mildly improved version of Jill Rodrigues'.  I think that the fundie homeschooling mindset has a lot more to do with JRod's poor education of her children than we think, and I think Jill Dillard will likely continue that as well.  JRod is a master organizer (honestly, probably more capable than Jill Dillard in this regard), and I don't think the only reason she fails to educate her kids is laziness.  I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that kids who are poorly homeschooled AND isolated to this degree don't know what actual education should look like.  They don't know that it ISN'T supposed to be just computer courses and workbooks for kids.  They don't know how to evaluate curriculum.  They don't know how to appropriately challenge students, or even that they are SUPPOSED to be challenged, given that likely they never were.  I think this leads to educational models like JRod's, where as soon as they reach a point where they CAN work alone, that is all they do.  Jill's exposure to school thru Derick may challenge that, but I think she'll rely heavily on just paging out workbooks because that's how she was taught.  

[crancraz]

1 hour ago, feministxtian said:

Newport News Shipbuilding is on a hiring spree again...

I don't think I want to go back...I love the desert 

How funny—I live the desert now, too. Arizona to be exact. I do love the desert, but every time I go home, it just feels like HOME. I’ve been out West for 14.5 years though, so chances that I’ll make it back feel slim. 

[VelociRapture]

1 hour ago, Carm_88 said:

I'm pretty sure they don't. Some of the older ones may, I think Jana does. I'm not certain about Jill.  Joy and the twins received a diploma from Duggar Academy, which doesn't point to getting a GED.

I’m almost positive I remember reading that some of them, Jill included, do have GEDs. Here’s what Michelle said a few years back:

http://www.tlc.com/tv-shows/19-kids-and-counting/michelle-duggars-blog/homeschooling-milestones/

She obviously could have been just making shit up. But I do think Jill would have needed to show some sort of official documentation to prove she finished her educational requirements considering she had to take some sort of upper level coursework in order to pursue Midwifery. Does anyone know what the North American Registry of Midwives requires? Or what the state of Arkansas would have required had her mentor not screwed her over completely?

[nausicaa]

1 hour ago, singsingsing said:

I only have about half my high school credits. I do have a university degree and could easily teach my hypothetical kids high school level English, History, Social Sciences etc., but not advanced Science, and not Math beyond the most basic level. I’m kind of an extreme example, but I feel like it would be difficult for most people who haven’t been trained as teachers to really effectively give their own children a well-rounded education. 

And even trained teachers are not expected to teach all subjects beyond fifth or sixth grade. High school teachers specialize, and while the English teacher may also teach journalism and drama, a public school high school teacher is not expected to cover AP chemistry, world literature, advanced visual art, and pre-calculus.

I don't mind co-ops theoretically, but seeing some of my former high school classmates (who struggled in basic classes and didn't take a single college course) teach in them really raises my eyebrows. I don't hate homeschooling, and wouldn't rule it out for my (hypothetical) kids in certain situations, but man it can really bring out the Dunning-Krueger in a lot of people. 

[feministxtian]

37 minutes ago, crancraz said:

How funny—I live the desert now, too. Arizona to be exact. I do love the desert, but every time I go home, it just feels like HOME. I’ve been out West for 14.5 years though, so chances that I’ll make it back feel slim. 

We lived in Gilbert for a couple of years before moving here to Vegas. 

[Lisafer]

24 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

And even trained teachers are not expected to teach all subjects beyond fifth or sixth grade. High school teachers specialize, and while the English teacher may also teach journalism and drama, a public school high school teacher is not expected to cover AP chemistry, world literature, advanced visual art, and pre-calculus.

I don't mind co-ops theoretically, but seeing some of my former high school classmates (who struggled in basic classes and didn't take a single college course) teach in them really raises my eyebrows. I don't hate homeschooling, and wouldn't rule it out for my (hypothetical) kids in certain situations, but man it can really bring out the Dunning-Krueger in a lot of people. 

Yeah, I was homeschooled through high school, and the only reason it worked out for me was because I was a very motivated, quick, self-directed learner. But I'm not planning to do that to my kids. By the time they reach high school age, it will be either public school, online learning, tutoring, or some combination...I'm not going to teach high school subjects on my own!

[NotQuiteMotY]

44 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

And even trained teachers are not expected to teach all subjects beyond fifth or sixth grade. High school teachers specialize, and while the English teacher may also teach journalism and drama, a public school high school teacher is not expected to cover AP chemistry, world literature, advanced visual art, and pre-calculus.

Very much this. My mother taught for several decades. Once, when the topic of homeschooling came up, she told us that while she was confident that she could handle the basics and the more advanced language and history courses, once we'd have gotten past middle school grades she couldn't have done math and probably not science, because not only was that never her strength but she had also not done anything in those fields since college.

[marmalade]

5 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

I’m almost positive I remember reading that some of them, Jill included, do have GEDs. Here’s what Michelle said a few years back:

http://www.tlc.com/tv-shows/19-kids-and-counting/michelle-duggars-blog/homeschooling-milestones/

She obviously could have been just making shit up. But I do think Jill would have needed to show some sort of official documentation to prove she finished her educational requirements considering she had to take some sort of upper level coursework in order to pursue Midwifery. Does anyone know what the North American Registry of Midwives requires? Or what the state of Arkansas would have required had her mentor not screwed her over completely?

I'm pretty sure that the only requirement for acceptance into AR's midwifery program was a HS diploma or equivalent. I'm pretty sure that the older ones down to about Jinger have GEDs. After that, it's a Duggar Academy crapshoot.

[marmalade]

Slight correction to my last post (too late to edit). I am referring to the lay midwifery program, not the more advanced nurse midwife one. 

[DarkAnts]

I think Jill has decided to put other desires for others before her own desires. She started out wanting to be a nurse with college plus to become a nurse in the missionary field. She was not allowed to continue with that so she decided that midwife training was the next best option. When she went to Central America her role was further reduced to mother. Nothing wrong with being a mother but I think Jill could have been a mother and more.

[libgirl2]

22 hours ago, feministxtian said:

We lived in Gilbert for a couple of years before moving here to Vegas. 

My cousin lives in Gilbert! 

My best friend home schooled until one child reached high school and the other middle school. Both did very well transitioning to public. My friend gave them a great start. She also has a Master's degree and is very intelligent. The main reason for home school was to give the kids a religious education. Both are in the their 20s and neither (including my friend) is very religious. 

[HarleyQuinn]

I'm so amused that the conversation for the last few pages was whether or not Jill was intelligent, then someone on reddit shared that old photo of her sticking a straw in a can of tomato sauce and letting Izzy drink it. Amazing companion pieces.  

[SassyPants]

55 minutes ago, HarleyQuinn said:

I'm so amused that the conversation for the last few pages was whether or not Jill was intelligent, then someone on reddit shared that old photo of her sticking a straw in a can of tomato sauce and letting Izzy drink it. Amazing companion pieces.  

The Duggars do have some weird methods. Cue all the “ we don’t know that the Duggars actually fed babies right out of cans with huge spoons or have stuck straws in tomato sauce to hydrate a toddler.” If I see a Duggar doing something on their show, I just assume that they actually partake in such activities, or that they’d refuse to do for the show. At the very least I’d expect some sort of disclaimer. IE, we really don’t feed babies cold or room temperature food directly  from a tin can. After having 19 kids and counting, we are brighter than that!

[Georgiana]

16 hours ago, DarkAnts said:

I think Jill has decided to put other desires for others before her own desires. She started out wanting to be a nurse with college plus to become a nurse in the missionary field. She was not allowed to continue with that so she decided that midwife training was the next best option. When she went to Central America her role was further reduced to mother. Nothing wrong with being a mother but I think Jill could have been a mother and more.

I personally believe that Jill very genuinely wanted a big family.  I think she hoped to outdo her parents.  I think being a mother of many was her primary desire, and that nursing/midwifing was something to fill the gaps before the kids came along.  So I think it's not that she put other desires before her desires when she toned them down or dropped outside commitments, but that she reassessed her priorities and desires and then managed them accordingly.  

I think Jill anticipated that she would be kept busy with an ever increasing number of children she would be responsible for while also either nursing a young infant or going through another pregnancy.  Obviously with only two kids spaced well apart, Jill has time on her hands she could fill, but that was never the plan.  Jill's plan probably was to have motherhood consume her entirely for a time, and she acted in accordance with that.  Without complications, Jill would be close to working on Dillard #4 by now, and it WOULD be nearly impossible for her to have her own substantial commitments in this lifestyle. 

And then nothing panned out like she thought it would.  

[SassyPants]

13 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

I personally believe that Jill very genuinely wanted a big family.  I think she hoped to outdo her parents.  I think being a mother of many was her primary desire, and that nursing/midwifing was something to fill the gaps before the kids came along.  So I think it's not that she put other desires before her desires when she toned them down or dropped outside commitments, but that she reassessed her priorities and desires and then managed them accordingly.  

I think Jill anticipated that she would be kept busy with an ever increasing number of children she would be responsible for while also either nursing a young infant or going through another pregnancy.  Obviously with only two kids spaced well apart, Jill has time on her hands she could fill, but that was never the plan.  Jill's plan probably was to have motherhood consume her entirely for a time, and she acted in accordance with that.  Without complications, Jill would be close to working on Dillard #4 by now, and it WOULD be nearly impossible for her to have her own substantial commitments in this lifestyle. 

And then nothing panned out like she thought it would.  

And I do wonder about the fact that many of the things that Jill claimed on the show to like or desire have not planned out at all. Mission work, Spanish language and midwife skills, having in Jill’s words “lots of kids” have all proved unsuccessful. I do wonder how these disappointments have affected the Dillard’s relationship and both of their temperaments. 

[JesSky03]

57 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

The Duggars do have some weird methods. Cue all the “ we don’t know that the Duggars actually fed babies right out of cans with huge spoons or have stuck straws in tomato sauce to hydrate a toddler.” If I see a Duggar doing something on their show, I just assume that they actually partake in such activities, or that they’d refuse to do for the show. At the very least I’d expect some sort of disclaimer. IE, we really don’t feed babies cold or room temperature food directly  from a tin can. After having 19 kids and counting, we are brighter than that!

I gave my almost 10 month old some baked beans the other day straight out of the can*. I didn't bother heating them up because then I would just have to cool them down and he doesn't really care for warm food 
 

*He was seated properly in a high chair and he feeds himself so he was in full control of how much was in his mouth at one time and only ate as much has he wanted (which is actually a surprisingly large amount haha). 

[Dandruff]

11 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

And then nothing panned out like she thought it would.

I agree with this, though I don't see her as a helpless bystander (not implying you do, though).  I think she expected Derick to be Prince Charming, the Lord to give her healthy deliveries on her own terms, and TLC to keep the gravy train going for a very long time because she trusted her "authorities" and because she wanted things that way.  I'm not sure she knows what to do when things are going wrong, so perhaps she just doubles down and pretends they're fine?  She actively defended Josh and promoted Derick when public opinion seemed turned against them.  She was in labor with Israel for way long after her water broke, I'm guessing because she was determined to have a vaginal birth, then ended up needing a c-section.  We don't know the details associated with Sam's birth and subsequent problems.  She wanted to go on a mission to CA, or whatever they were doing there, but seemed to not like it when they were there.  Did she think it would be the same as her family going for a week or two, handing out presents, feeding and hugging orphans, and having each other for support pretty much all the time?  I think she needs to look at each situation for what it is vs. what she wants, reevaluate her goals as necessary, then research, plan, and work to achieve them. 

[SassyPants]

9 minutes ago, JesSky03 said:

I gave my almost 10 month old some baked beans the other day straight out of the can*. I didn't bother heating them up because then I would just have to cool them down and he doesn't really care for warm food 
 

*He was seated properly in a high chair and he feeds himself so he was in full control of how much was in his mouth at one time and only ate as much has he wanted (which is actually a surprisingly large amount haha). 

A think that sounds a whole lot different from holding and feeding in a flat position.

[JesSky03]

6 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

A think that sounds a whole lot different from holding and feeding in a flat position.

Oh for sure, just pointing out that I don't think its weird to give a kid room temperature food straight from a can. I mean tomato sauce with a straw is really weird to me but if the kid likes it then whatever. If Michelle had given the baby the can and a spoon while sitting in a high chair would we still be criticizing her?

[SassyPants]

Since I’ve never sat down and eaten RT food out of the can, with a spoon or any other implement, I wouldn’t and didn’t feed my children in that way. Like you said you found drinking tomato sauce with a straw, and straight out of the can as odd, I feel the same about using a tin can as a bowl. Different strokes. I am not surprised that the Duggars default to easy, as 19 children would force most of us to do things differently.

[SilverBeach]

I don't think that having less than average intelligence makes someone an intellectual "bottom feeder", although I'm not sure what that is supposed to mean. I'm no fan of Jill, but she doesn't strike me as having less than average intelligence. I'm not sure what the poster actually was trying to say by that somewhat harsh phrasing, but perhaps it was something more like Dwreck and Jill are an intellectual mismatch? It seems that fundy men do not want women on their level, at least not those who have achieved much in the intellectual arena despite their potential. It is nice to be in a relationship with someone who you find mentally stimulating, for me it is far better than when, in the interest of not being snobbish, I had few standards in this regard.