Lori Alexander 49: Immodest, Indiscreet, and Downright Inappropriate

[Alisamer]

12 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

Someone further up asked what helped my marriage that Lori has suggested...mostly not expecting anything from him, a lot of keeping my mouth shut and not nagging, doing nice things for him even if he was being a pain in the butt...just to name the most important. He doesn’t believe in God while I do so it’s a unique challenge. 

I'm glad that these things have helped your marriage, and I wish you the best.

However, we discuss Lori here because not all her followers are able to pick out the very few good parts and leave the rest.

It's like picking the corn kernels out of a turd, with Lori. On the (very) rare occasion she posts something useful that isn't outright vile, it's tainted by her lack of empathy and care and her hypocrisy.

[Jessesgirl25]

5 minutes ago, Loveday said:

Did you by any chance read the announcement Curious--the owner of this forum, by the way, in case you were unaware of that-- posted that appears at the top of EVERY PAGE on this forum? It's about you, and how we should all maybe give you a second chance. I was considering that, and I'm sure others are as well, but with comments like this, that second chance is about to go out the window. I'm fairly sure you don't care, but it's pretty damned rude to throw Curious's plea back in her face like this.

--Miss Queen Sh*t on Turd Island 

 

 

@feministxtian, good luck on your first day! You got this! 

 

First of all, I’m tired of getting shit from people when I have already explained it a handful of times already. And yes I did read it, did anyone else read it when they are still asking questions about downvoting?!? My apologies to Curious if in fact she feels I threw it back in her face as that was not my intent. Some feel the need to still bring things up over again and I’m being honest when I say I can’t explain it anymore than I already have. Beating a dead horse here! I was being made fun of for not typing a full curse word and the person to whom I replied to has cursed alot so I was just returning the favor. Thought that was maybe more her speed. It’s obvious that no matter what I say or how I explain it some of you will not like me and that’s fine! I didn’t come here to win a popularity contest. And I did sincerely mean for her to have a good day at work, that wasn’t sarcastic or “snarky”.  

[Imrlgoddess]

Because we need a cooler, and I'm "that guy":

Spoiler

@feministxtian:  Get'em, you'll do fine! xo

[Frog99]

13 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

Someone further up asked what helped my marriage that Lori has suggested...mostly not expecting anything from him, a lot of keeping my mouth shut and not nagging, doing nice things for him even if he was being a pain in the butt...just to name the most important. He doesn’t believe in God while I do so it’s a unique challenge. 

I have expectations of my husband, just like he has expectations of me- mainly around supporting our personal, professional, and family goals, taking care of what needs to be handled, parenting expectations, and not keeping score. We talk about our needs and expectations. We also both recognize that when it comes down to it, the only person you are in control of is yourself. You control your attitude, behavior, and response. 

7 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

My mom would have came straight to Lori, she was the Christian who didn’t believe in divorce and even though my father was an alcoholic abuser, emotionally and physically, I was a mouthy kid so therefore I deserved some of it. 

Emotional and physical abuse is never a deserved response. Kids and teens are supposed to be “mouthy”, and in your situation, your “mouthiness” was likely escalated due to your early childhood experiences. 

@feministxtian have a GREAT day today! 

[EowynW]

Good luck at your first day, @feministxtian

And thank you all so much for the kind words about my new job. I start tomorrow and am still terribly anxious about it. But I think I can do it. In my former life as a fundie SAHD, I was not pushed to get various jobs, prepare for interviews, and work in a variety of situations. So as stupid as this is, this kind of stuff is hard for me. Part of me would just hide in the house all day, knitting and gardening. But I get bored and depressed home all the time and I enjoy working to help my family. So it's a weird mix of emotions right now. But guys, I am so excited to be helping my family. If this job works out it means we can start slowly saving for a down payment and also afford a simple used car in the future. It means we can save to go camping sometimes. Or even a hotel trip somewhere. It means I can set back a little money for Mr. EW to work on building his telescope. We will still have to be careful but it means the edge is taken off and I am so grateful. 

[Jessesgirl25]

11 minutes ago, usmcmom said:

Quoting myself because I'm wonderinf if you, @Jessesgirl25, have had time to give any thought to my question about Lori. 

Cripes, sorry! I admire her commitment to put things out there that aren’t popular whether it’s something I agree with or not or how wrong she may be. So I guess in a word, her resiliency. The internet is rough as we all probably know. For me personally I was thankful that in some cases of problems in my life if I needed advice or had a question she would respond almost immediately to me with some helpful words of encouragement and advice. I admired her ability to set aside whatever issues she and I were having or have had to respond respectfully to me and to put differences aside. 

[Frog99]

@EowynW saying a prayer for you! Our sermon yesterday focused on dealing with insecurity. 

Sermon points: 1) we become immobilized when we let insecurity intertwine in our life 2) inadequacy will limit your intimacy with God 3) being effective requires us to put forth effort. 

She preached from Exodus 4:1-5. 

You can do this!

[polecat]

26 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

My mom would have came straight to Lori, she was the Christian who didn’t believe in divorce and even though my father was an alcoholic abuser, emotionally and physically, I was a mouthy kid so therefore I deserved some of it. Since then however my Mom has divorced him, remarried and apologized to me for a lot and what she allowed and all has been forgiven. Preference would have been to come here because as I’ve said, I don’t agree with lori about everything. 

Mouthiness is an entirely normal teen behavior. Age-appropriate. You -- and no kid -- should be hurt for that. 

If anything, mouthiness can be a good trait for a kid to have -- that's a kid who's not afraid to speak up when things aren't right. A kid who's not afraid to back down from his/her opinions. 

Parents just need to have the patience and wisdom to guide that mouthiness in the right direction. 

 

[Imrlgoddess]

@Jessesgirl25 Please forgive if we ask for proof of this encouragement from her.  Thus far no one here has seen her be kind to anyone.  She's never even expressed a deep love or affection for her husband...she just strikes me as a cold, callous gold-digger.  

[church_of_dog]

1 hour ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

As I explained above it wasn’t your comment I meant to downvote, it was what you quoted.

Just want to be sure you know that "responses" (ie upvotes/downvotes) can be added, removed, or changed at any point.  Years later.  Or even now.

So if you realize, say, that you made a technical goof by responding to what someone quoted rather than to the actual post, it's easy to remedy that.  As easy as, say, an authentic apology might be.  Ya know, theoretically.  Just sayin'. 

57 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

Good Morning. I’m moving on from the downvoting nonsense, I can’t explain it anymore than I already have. If downvotes are so detrimental, I should be a puddle right now but I’m not and I’m moving on.

Good thing that explanations trump earnest apologies and corrections.

Also a good thing that you reminded us of the proper emotional reaction to a downvote.  Dog forbid we might have gone on thinking that each person might ought to be considered an autonomous adult who might have their own reaction, which reaction (within a range of reason) ought to be respected.

topic-change palate cleanser: https://goo.gl/images/ufsKhM 

now, @feministxtian, go get 'em!  You got this, in spades with bells on! 

[Free Jana Duggar]

I know, I know! *raises hand*

She has shown sympathy to Trey and other men who whine that they don't get enough sex.

[Jessesgirl25]

8 minutes ago, Imrlgoddess said:

@Jessesgirl25 Please forgive if we ask for proof of this encouragement from her.  Thus far no one here has seen her be kind to anyone.  She's never even expressed a deep love or affection for her husband...she just strikes me as a cold, callous gold-digger.  

To be completely transparent with you, I don’t have them anymore. I deleted them because I had questions about what to do with some things in my marriage that I didn’t want my husband to see because he doesn’t believe in God and that has caused agruments between us. 

One message she quite surprised me, as far as her modesty posts. My husband prefers me to wear much more revealing clothes than what would be allowed according to what she posts about the subject. I was torn because being a Christian, modesty is a big deal and I wanted to see exactly what my options were on this subject, lol! I asked her and she basically said if that’s what he likes than wear it. That took me by surprise because I was expecting if it’s disobeying God, what your husband wants is null and void. So it’s daisy dukes and bikini tops this summer! LOL! 

[Mellowing With Age]

54 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

My mom would have came straight to Lori, she was the Christian who didn’t believe in divorce and even though my father was an alcoholic abuser, emotionally and physically, I was a mouthy kid so therefore I deserved some of it. Since then however my Mom has divorced him, remarried and apologized to me for a lot and what she allowed and all has been forgiven. Preference would have been to come here because as I’ve said, I don’t agree with lori about everything. 

No, NO you didn't. Just because you were mouthy doesn't mean you deserved it! NO CHILD does! 

[Jessesgirl25]

Does it bother anyone else that she allows men to comment to women on her posts? Like, strange men?!? Always told to go to your husbands or a pastor but strange men on the internet are an exception. That Thomas...gah! 

[Imrlgoddess]

6 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

Does it bother anyone else that she allows men to comment to women on her posts? Like, strange men?!? Always told to go to your husbands or a pastor but strange men on the internet are an exception. That Thomas...gah! 

Yes, it's been discussed at length in the past.  She allows vile men (and women) to comment and has made many blog posts and doodles based on what they've said.  Her current favorite is KB Davies.  He's a sicko  that believes in domestic discipline and that a woman obeys a man in everything no matter what.  She devoted an entire blog to him recently:  

https://thetransformedwife.com/raise-your-daughters-right/

As far as modesty goes....that's your choice..  If your fella likes certain things but they make you uncomfortable then just wear it at home.  You and you alone choose how you dress and how you want to be seen in the world around you.

[Mellowing With Age]

45 minutes ago, EowynW said:

And thank you all so much for the kind words about my new job. I start tomorrow and am still terribly anxious about it. But I think I can do it. In my former life as a fundie SAHD, I was not pushed to get various jobs, prepare for interviews, and work in a variety of situations. So as stupid as this is, this kind of stuff is hard for me. Part of me would just hide in the house all day, knitting and gardening. But I get bored and depressed home all the time and I enjoy working to help my family. So it's a weird mix of emotions right now. But guys, I am so excited to be helping my family. If this job works out it means we can start slowly saving for a down payment and also afford a simple used car in the future. It means we can save to go camping sometimes. Or even a hotel trip somewhere. It means I can set back a little money for Mr. EW to work on building his telescope. We will still have to be careful but it means the edge is taken off and I am so grateful. 

Congratulations and yes, YOU CAN DO IT!  I am sure you will be AMAZING! 

[Curious]

1 hour ago, Loveday said:

Did you by any chance read the announcement Curious--the owner of this forum, by the way, in case you were unaware of that-- posted that appears at the top of EVERY PAGE on this forum? It's about you, and how we should all maybe give you a second chance. I was considering that, and I'm sure others are as well, but with comments like this, that second chance is about to go out the window. I'm fairly sure you don't care, but it's pretty damned rude to throw Curious's plea back in her face like this.

--Miss Queen Sh*t on Turd Island 

 

 

@feministxtian, good luck on your first day! You got this! 

 

To be fair, other people have been ignoring my post as well.  I've discussed things with @Jessesgirl25 privately and she and I are fine.   I would like it if we could all move past last night and get back to focusing on the horrible things Lori posts daily.

There were some misunderstandings and miscommunications last night and I think that is mostly cleared up now, so let's give her a chance to be a productive member of the forum like we would anyone else.

Thanks!

[Loveday]

1 minute ago, Curious said:

To be fair, other people have been ignoring my post as well.  I've discussed things with @Jessesgirl25 privately and she and I are fine.   I would like it if we could all move past last night and get back to focusing on the horrible things Lori posts daily.

There were some misunderstandings and miscommunications last night and I think that is mostly cleared up now, so let's give her a chance to be a productive member of the forum like we would anyone else.

Thanks!

I will be glad to. I hope she can move past it as well, with everyone.

[Hisey]

1 hour ago, SongRed7 said:

1000% agreed! I had foot surgery last Tuesday and due to being incapacitated, on serious pain meds, and generally feeling like crap -- my entire family ( 24 yo daughter, 22 yo son, 13 yo daughter, hubby and my sister (who came for 5 days to help)...worked together not only to take care of me but also keep the household running, laundry, meals, feeding the pets, keeping the house tidy, running errands, etc.

No one pulled the "I'm a man card" or stated that only the women had to do these tasks.   Everyone worked together and NO ONE complained.  that's how normal families operate.  We help one another!

 

 

 

You mean you didn't "respectfully request" if he was "naturally inclined" to help you?

31 minutes ago, Mellowing With Age said:

No, NO you didn't. Just because you were mouthy doesn't mean you deserved it! NO CHILD does! 

This is absolutely true. I just laugh at my "mouthy" kid. Or I set reasonable boundaries ("If you talk to me that way, you can't. . . "). Or I vent to my husband. Or I ask her to leave till she can talk to me politely. There are lots of options.

[Alisamer]

34 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

One message she quite surprised me, as far as her modesty posts. My husband prefers me to wear much more revealing clothes than what would be allowed according to what she posts about the subject. I was torn because being a Christian, modesty is a big deal and I wanted to see exactly what my options were on this subject, lol! I asked her and she basically said if that’s what he likes than wear it. That took me by surprise because I was expecting if it’s disobeying God, what your husband wants is null and void. So it’s daisy dukes and bikini tops this summer! LOL! 

Well, Lori wears shorts and leggings and cleavage-showing tops whenever she wants, so you should also be able to wear whatever you want. She says "Ken likes it" (which I suspect means when she said "do you like my outfit" he said "yes dear" to get her out of his hair), you can say your husband likes it. 

My opinion is it's nobody else's business what clothes someone wears, as long as they aren't being blatantly inappropriate or disrespectful, because times change and fashions change, and everyone is responsible for their own self.

[Frog99]

30 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

Does it bother anyone else that she allows men to comment to women on her posts? Like, strange men?!? Always told to go to your husbands or a pastor but strange men on the internet are an exception. That Thomas...gah! 

This is Thomas Ackerman: http://www.holinessofthebride.com/about 

He also posted this: 

Spoiler

 

[Curious]

1 hour ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

I was being made fun of for not typing a full curse word

I wasn't necessarily making fun of you.  I wasn't sure if you were aware that adult language is ok and it just struck me as funny that you used an * on bitch, which I don't even really consider a swear word, but I fully admit I can swear like a sailor so my "swear" words may be different than other peoples.   I see I didn't add an emoji which I thought I had, so it probably came across far harsher than I intended.  Sorry about that!

[Jessesgirl25]

5 minutes ago, Curious said:

I wasn't necessarily making fun of you.  I wasn't sure if you were aware that adult language is ok and it just struck me as funny that you used an * on bitch, which I don't even really consider a swear word, but I fully admit I can swear like a sailor so my "swear" words may be different than other peoples.   I see I didn't add an emoji which I thought I had, so it probably came across far harsher than I intended.  Sorry about that!

It’s okay, no apology necessary! Yesterday was a cluster and words were flying! I generally try not to curse but I did see your point! LOL! 

[Curious]

44 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

Does it bother anyone else that she allows men to comment to women on her posts? Like, strange men?!? Always told to go to your husbands or a pastor but strange men on the internet are an exception. That Thomas...gah! 

I think it's safe to say it bothers ALL of us.  It's a frequent topic of discussion on her threads.  The fact that she's not supposed to be teaching men (according to her) and she interacts with more sympathy to every man than she ever has a woman asking for her advice is also bothersome for most of us.

56 minutes ago, Jessesgirl25 said:

she basically said if that’s what he likes than wear it. That took me by surprise because I was expecting if it’s disobeying God, what your husband wants is null and void. So it’s daisy dukes and bikini tops this summer

 

The irony of this response from Lori is that if she saw you on the beach wearing what she told you to wear because it's your husband's preference, she would come back and blog about what a horrible heathen slutty mcslutterson you are (ok she would probably say Jezabel) for tempting all those poor innocent men on the beach with you naughty bits showing for the world to see.

She would also suggest she wants to paddle you for wearing those things 

[polecat]

19 minutes ago, Frog99 said:

This is Thomas Ackerman: http://www.holinessofthebride.com/about 

He also posted this: 

  Hide contents

 

"If she's sick or very tired, I often let it wait, but I can certainly insist if I want and she will accept it."

He *often* lets it wait ... often. But not always. He can always insist, and she'll "accept" it. Ah, yes, accepting sex (not passionately fucking your husband's brains out, mind you, just "accepting" the grunting, thrusting pig on top of you) when you're sick and tired -- true love right there. /s

"What will the government do if you don't give them what you owe them?"

idk about anyone else, but I do NOT have a government/citizen relationship with my husband. We love one another. I do not love the government. And I can guaran-freaking-tee they don't love me, either. I'm an ssn to them, a taxpayer, literally nothing more.

Also, I don't "owe" my husband sex. We enjoy one another, share with one another, but do not OWE one another sex. Damn.