Dillards 56: Running a Marathon but not Working

[Pecansforeveryone]

I don't know if Joshua Harris invented the fundie version of courtship, or if he just popularized it into the mainstream with IKDB. I do think he played a wider part in many scenarios like Derrick and Jill's. I found his apology disingenuous at best and opportunistic at worst. Nothing like waiting 20 years to apologize and then only because your failed gig as mega-pastor left you scrambling for plan B. 

[Satan'sFortress]

51 minutes ago, JordynDarby5 said:

 

My dad former Army and always voted Republican before Trump saw that and was so pissed off. He was already having trouble voting for someone who had 5 deferments for the same war my dad had to go fight in. Then he mocked a POW. What John McCain went through? What the other men went through in those places were horrible. Mocking the disable (I have muscle spams one or both arms shake at times, or my foot or head still working on the cause but it just comes and goes), insulting women and racist comments only made it easy for my dad to decide not to vote for him.

@Beermeet too

This---of all the shitty and appalling things that he's said, for me, demeaning John McCain still ranks as the worst (and that is saying a lot.)  I remember thinking --"well, that's it, Trump can't survive that!"  How young and foolish I was back then.

[littlemommy]

I think the most personal legacy from Trump to me is the feeling of betrayal I have for the people in my extended family who voted for him. They are not bad people, but they were myopic. They are against abortion. He said he was, too. He probably didn’t mean it, but he said it, and that was enough for them. They blinded themselves to everything else over that one issue, and so many people have a similar story that the jackass got elected.

Someday Trump will be gone but my family will still be my family, and I just can’t write that many people out of my life. 

[EmmieJ]

5 hours ago, JordynDarby5 said:

This is really what surprises me the most. He didn't hide his awfulness and still doesn't. He didn't make remarks behind close doors or even say anything that was taken out of context. He did everything on camera. He did mocked disable people in front of the cameras to millions. He made disgusting comments about women on camera. He made racist comments. And he still won. People laughed. Who laughs at someone mocking disabled people? Who votes for someone who does that?                          

A bunch of people who want to claim they are "nice" and "decent".  But that's a veneer they can't wear again.

[Beermeet]

13 minutes ago, Satan'sFortress said:

@Beermeet too

This---of all the shitty and appalling things that he's said, for me, demeaning John McCain still ranks as the worst (and that is saying a lot.)  I remember thinking --"well, that's it, Trump can't survive that!"  How young and foolish I was back then.

Seriously.  Absolutely unheard of to speak of our POW's and MIA's like that.  To say" I prefer my heroes to not get caught" or however 45 worded that is unspeakable.   Ultimate disrespect from a presidential candidate no less.  Shit like that should automatically disqualify any candidate.  Such a disgrace.

The upside of all this is that many have a renewed love for and feel protective of our country and each other.  

[mollysmom]

17 minutes ago, littlemommy said:

I think the most personal legacy from Trump to me is the feeling of betrayal I have for the people in my extended family who voted for him. They are not bad people, but they were myopic. They are against abortion. He said he was, too. He probably didn’t mean it, but he said it, and that was enough for them. They blinded themselves to everything else over that one issue, and so many people have a similar story that the jackass got elected.

Someday Trump will be gone but my family will still be my family, and I just can’t write that many people out of my life. 

I'll never forget growing up my ultra fundie mom used to always brag that when she voted, she didn't care where they stood on ANYTHING......except abortion. She literally bragged that she went down the list and voted for whoever was against abortion (regardless of where they stood on anything else) Even back then I thought that was pretty fucked up but of course I didn't dare go against anything she said. But yeah, unfortunately that's how MANY fundies believe. 

[Pecansforeveryone]

9 minutes ago, mollysmom said:

I'll never forget growing up my ultra fundie mom used to always brag that when she voted, she didn't care where they stood on ANYTHING......except abortion. She literally bragged that she went down the list and voted for whoever was against abortion (regardless of where they stood on anything else) Even back then I thought that was pretty fucked up but of course I didn't dare go against anything she said. But yeah, unfortunately that's how MANY fundies believe. 

I have heard it referenced on Free Jinger that Jim Bob's tunnel vision on abortion cost him his re-election bid. Something to the effect of he missed many important votes on the House floor, only showing up when he could grandstand on the abortion issue. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

I think I'm most gobsmacked at Trump's statements that he could kill a person on 5th Avenue and nobody would bat an eye... and a guy DIED in Trump Tower (on 5th Ave) and nobody batted an eye. And nobody bats an eye when he mocks disabled people. And nobody bats an eye when it's revealed he had affair(s). And nobody bats an eye when he supposedly (per a killed Enquirer story) had a child during an affair. And nobody bats an eye when he does ANY.DAMN.THING.

We're all just sitting here, like.... WHAT? WHATTTT? What just happened? Why isn't anyone saying/doing anything? The protest marches are great, but NOBODY CARES.

Apathy will be the downfall of our country and, eventually, civilization. 

 

(Edit:  the "nobody" here clearly doesn't refer to any one specific person, in RL or on FJ - just a figure of speech.)

[apandaaries]

3 hours ago, Beermeet said:

Trump himself mocked a reporter with a disability.   Idk what the reporter's diagnosis is but you can see malformations in his arms and hands.  Trump actually moved his hands to mimic the reporter's.  Disgusting.

I agree. It was disgusting and repulsive, beneath the dignity of anyone watching. I also love to add links for people, just in case they want to read up more.  You can find the snopes discussion here: https://www.snopes.com/news/2016/07/28/donald-trump-criticized-for-mocking-disabled-reporter/

@feministxtian, you're clearly still quite mad at your mother.  Fair enough and none of my business.  But I'd urge you recognize that her situation was her own. Other undocumented immigrants have their own problems, concerns, and legal issues. Even Arizona newspapers (during the Obama years!) would comment on the difficulties involved in obtaining citizenship: https://arizonadailyindependent.com/2018/04/02/path-to-citizenship-is-long-frustrating-and-expensive/

A more recent article: http://abcnews.go.com/Business/story?id=87996&page=1

The US has a lot of immigrants fleeing shitty situations -- often situations that the US has covertly helped foment. To blame average citizens, many of them children, for fleeing these circumstances is, to me, questionable at best and morally abominable at worst.  Our borders don't make us better than anyone else, especially those seeking help. There's nothing inherently morally superior to being American, and to send back those who face almost certain death is an abdication of the best values we (often pretend to) hold as Americans.

We also have situations now where FBI informants face being deported under 45's watch, after providing valuable information about MS-13: https://features.propublica.org/ms-13/a-betrayal-ms13-gang-police-fbi-ice-deportation/

Though he has been granted a temporary reprieve. Let's hope it lasts: http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2018/04/teen-ms-13-informant-facing-deportation-gets-temporary-reprieve.html

Except for the Native Americans, all US citizens descend from immigrants. It'd be nice to see us do unto others as we would have them do unto ourselves. 

 

 

[acheronbeach]

2 hours ago, singsingsing said:

If only Jill had got her hands on this before she married dickhead Derick...

I hope she and Jeremy also read Pastor Reju's book about identifying and addressing child abuse in the church.  Of all the Duggar daughters' transformations, Jinger's newfound appreciation of books leaves me the most hopeful. 

 

Honestly, just IMAGINE Jill trying to articulately post about a book she was reading.  It'd be a hot mess.

[anjulibai]

There's an article on CNN.com about a pregnant woman with two children in that caravan that came up through Mexico. It's very sad. She's hoping for asylum, but she and her boys might just end up here illegally. 

https://www.cnn.com/2018/04/27/us/mexico-migrant-caravan-diary/index.html

Just putting this out there. 

[feministxtian]

2 hours ago, amandaaries said:

The US has a lot of immigrants fleeing shitty situations -- often situations that the US has covertly helped foment. To blame average citizens, many of them children, for fleeing these circumstances is, to me, questionable at best and morally abominable at worst.  Our borders don't make us better than anyone else, especially those seeking help. There's nothing inherently morally superior to being American, and to send back those who face almost certain death is an abdication of the best values we (often pretend to) hold as Americans.

I look at it as violating US law...end of discussion. There are penalties for breaking the law. To quote Baretta (old cop show) "don't do the crime if you can't do the time". I feel sorry for their shitty situation, however, getting their shorts in a knot over getting deported is just whatever...that's the penalty for violating the law. 

The rest of my family came here legally...my paternal grandparents through Ellis Island, my mother's siblings by applying for the appropriate exit and entrance visas and jumping through the hoops to enter the US legally. I'm sorry the immigration system sucks ass. I've stated that I think the kids who are brought here by their parents should have a path to legality and citizenship, they had no choice. Their parents, on the other hand, just show up, then don't bother. I also have an issue with the lack of assimilation. For the love of God...learn fucking English. I think at least rudimentary English (enough to get your point across) should also be a requirement. Yes, I speak and understand Spanish, but...damn...no. Learn fucking English...

[SapphireSlytherin]

The USA's immigration policies are among the MOST LENIENT in the fucking WORLD.

I'm married to a Brit. I can NOT move to the UK without jumping through more strenuous hoops than the significantly ridiculous hoops HE jumped through to move here LEGALLY. Add to that the financial hoops. And the cultural hoops. And the "Life in the UK" test.

I have ZERO (that would be NONE) sympathy for people who come here illegally.

[BunnyBee]

There is a lovely politics part of FJ that an immigration or the politics surrounding immigration debate would fit perfectly into!

Just wanted to add that I both a frequent reader of both the political threads and the Duggar threads, but I would love to keep them separate! So when I am in the mood to laugh at Dwreck I can, with out getting my daily rage filled cup of politics when I don't want it. 

[BernRul]

Hey, I'm a long time lurker, first time poster here. The Trump/immigration debate brought me out.

I'm nervous even typing this, but here it goes: my husband has DACA. A couple friends have it. I worked with an advocacy group years ago for DREAMERs. When Trump was elected, I sobbed. I thought my life was over. My husband, who has been in America since he was a toddler, was the one to tell me "sometimes you have to take the loss. Life goes on." I am humbled by his courage, his strength. It hurt to see people I knew, these "good" people vote for a man who is a real threat to people's lives. My husband and I will be fine--we've gone through this hell long enough, you know, and we've learned how to deal with it and love life anyway. Whatever happens, we'll meet it when it does. But others aren't so lucky. I've heard DACA kids, the younger ones, talk about suicide a lot. They talk about running into the bathroom after class or during work and bawling their eyes out. I worry for those guys. I just hope people realize that there are consequences for voting for Trump, even if they don't see it.

As for other undocumented immigrants, the adults, well, I can't speak for all of them. I'm sure plenty are criminals and lazy and bad people, but there are 11 million in the US. That's double the Jewish population. Most of them are just people, some who made mistakes, some who were screwed over by bad lawyers and an unforgiving system, and some who intentionally broke the law.

I've heard stories. Some DREAMERS have legal parents, but they couldn't get legalized because the court backlogs caused them to age out of their petition. Some families tried to legalize themselves only to get bad advice from crappy lawyers who prey on desperate people. Some women came here to marry, were raped and impregnated, and than abaondaned because he "changed his mind" with a US citizen baby. Most of these people come from poor, third world countries, many ravaged by the wars that the US foreign policy helped create.  The ten year ban prevents them from going back, because after only a  few months of falling out of status, it kicks in. They have family in the USA that they can't imagine being seperated from for 10 years. 

My mother-in-law is one of those. I won't say what her situation was, but I will say that she is the kindest woman I met. My uncle tore my family apart all because his white niece had a child with a man of a differnet race. My mother-in-law accepted me with open arms, despite our racial and cultural differences. She gives 10% of her income to charity. She is one of the few religious people I knew who truly lives what Jesus taught. 

Every time people say this stuff about illegals it's a stab to my heart. Over the years, it's gotten easier, but the pain is still there. I've learned to live with it, but it's like someone who suffers from chronic pain--they deal, but that doesn't make the pain go away.

I'm not trying to change anyone's minds. I'm just offering a counterpoint, before we start dehumanizing 11 million real, flesh and blood people. 

[Destiny]

7 hours ago, RubyRei said:

ETA: Since I can ask without writing a whole separate post, I have searched far and wide and cannot figure out what “riffles” are- like when people comment on their edit. Maybe I didn’t look hard enough but I swear I tried! Forever indebted to someone who can finally satiate my curiosity on what “riffles” are/means!!!

It's a typo. It's been so long, I honestly don't entirely remember where it came from, but some random fundie used it as a typo for rifles, FJ found it hilarious as we are wont to do, and suddenly it became the FJ joke for typos. 

Edit: found it. It was back on Yuku, and apparently was Kendal. https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/freejinger/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=7618&p=7275&hilit=riffles#p7275

[19catsandcounting]

Where you're born is so arbitrary.

Whenever this topic is brought up I feel so fortunate that I happen to have been born in a place that I feel safe/satisfied/able to just live and try to be happy (shitty presidents aside). I, admittedly, have a tendency to give people the benefit of the doubt pretty much always, but I still think... if someone is willing to risk everything to move to a new country where they don't speak the language and have limited support and have next to no rights, but maybe, just maybe, their lives will be a little bit better than they were before... we should just let them stay.

Also, Trump sucks. I don't care who voted for him at this point, but can we please, PLEASE not vote him or any of his like in again? The next big election is coming faster than I ever thought it would, and I can't take another four years.

[Glasgowghirl]

5 hours ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

The USA's immigration policies are among the MOST LENIENT in the fucking WORLD.

I'm married to a Brit. I can NOT move to the UK without jumping through more strenuous hoops than the significantly ridiculous hoops HE jumped through to move here LEGALLY. Add to that the financial hoops. And the cultural hoops. And the "Life in the UK" test.

I have ZERO (that would be NONE) sympathy for people who come here illegally.

The current UK government are a joke, especially when it comes to immigration they were trying to deport people who the invited over from the Commonwealth after the war. 

[Illmarryyoujana]

5 hours ago, feministxtian said:

I look at it as violating US law...end of discussion. There are penalties for breaking the law. To quote Baretta (old cop show) "don't do the crime if you can't do the time". I feel sorry for their shitty situation, however, getting their shorts in a knot over getting deported is just whatever...that's the penalty for violating the law. 

The rest of my family came here legally...my paternal grandparents through Ellis Island, my mother's siblings by applying for the appropriate exit and entrance visas and jumping through the hoops to enter the US legally. I'm sorry the immigration system sucks ass. I've stated that I think the kids who are brought here by their parents should have a path to legality and citizenship, they had no choice. Their parents, on the other hand, just show up, then don't bother. I also have an issue with the lack of assimilation. For the love of God...learn fucking English. I think at least rudimentary English (enough to get your point across) should also be a requirement. Yes, I speak and understand Spanish, but...damn...no. Learn fucking English...

How lucky are you that your family immigrated when they did. Was your mothers family fleeing a horrible homeland? As far as language goes, we have no official language. We wouldn’t be much of a free country if we required people to know the unofficial majority language. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

2 hours ago, Illmarryyoujana said:

We wouldn’t be much of a free country

Sadly, we're not much of a free country anyway. 

https://www.usnews.com/news/best-countries/articles/2016-11-29/these-are-the-freest-countries-in-the-world 

 

 

[HermioneSparrow]

7 hours ago, BernRul said:

Hey, I'm a long time lurker, first time poster here. The Trump/immigration debate brought me out.

I'm nervous even typing this, but here it goes: my husband has DACA. A couple friends have it. I worked with an advocacy group years ago for DREAMERs. When Trump was elected, I sobbed. I thought my life was over. My husband, who has been in America since he was a toddler, was the one to tell me "sometimes you have to take the loss. Life goes on." I am humbled by his courage, his strength. It hurt to see people I knew, these "good" people vote for a man who is a real threat to people's lives. My husband and I will be fine--we've gone through this hell long enough, you know, and we've learned how to deal with it and love life anyway. Whatever happens, we'll meet it when it does. But others aren't so lucky. I've heard DACA kids, the younger ones, talk about suicide a lot. They talk about running into the bathroom after class or during work and bawling their eyes out. I worry for those guys. I just hope people realize that there are consequences for voting for Trump, even if they don't see it.

As for other undocumented immigrants, the adults, well, I can't speak for all of them. I'm sure plenty are criminals and lazy and bad people, but there are 11 million in the US. That's double the Jewish population. Most of them are just people, some who made mistakes, some who were screwed over by bad lawyers and an unforgiving system, and some who intentionally broke the law.

I've heard stories. Some DREAMERS have legal parents, but they couldn't get legalized because the court backlogs caused them to age out of their petition. Some families tried to legalize themselves only to get bad advice from crappy lawyers who prey on desperate people. Some women came here to marry, were raped and impregnated, and than abaondaned because he "changed his mind" with a US citizen baby. Most of these people come from poor, third world countries, many ravaged by the wars that the US foreign policy helped create.  The ten year ban prevents them from going back, because after only a  few months of falling out of status, it kicks in. They have family in the USA that they can't imagine being seperated from for 10 years. 

My mother-in-law is one of those. I won't say what her situation was, but I will say that she is the kindest woman I met. My uncle tore my family apart all because his white niece had a child with a man of a differnet race. My mother-in-law accepted me with open arms, despite our racial and cultural differences. She gives 10% of her income to charity. She is one of the few religious people I knew who truly lives what Jesus taught. 

Every time people say this stuff about illegals it's a stab to my heart. Over the years, it's gotten easier, but the pain is still there. I've learned to live with it, but it's like someone who suffers from chronic pain--they deal, but that doesn't make the pain go away.

I'm not trying to change anyone's minds. I'm just offering a counterpoint, before we start dehumanizing 11 million real, flesh and blood people. 

Thank you for voicing my thoughts. I'm an immigrant, I did not go to the U.S. because of how hard it is to get legal there when you're a latino, instead I chose Argentina to immigrate.

I'm doing good here, I'm a medical student, a hardworker honest person with no criminal records... While I did not choose the U.S., I know a bunch of people as honest as I am struggling in the U.S. because they're illegal. I'm from Venezuela, most folks there can't even get passports right now or any other document required to apply residency in any country (the government is not allowing it), and the U.S. is not giving us refugee status.

My country is in a critical situation, most people are leaving out of desperation... A little story: a terminally ill kid a few weeks ago went to the U.S. to get treatment, was denied entry and deported. Yep, not even for humanitarian reasons (there's not even alcohol to treat injuries in my country). So... The fact that people dare to judge and criticize why some are illegal is appaling and it hurts. Not everyone is a criminal who wants to do shady stuff in the U.S., in fact most immigrants go there to get a better life, to work, to study... For different reasons. I'm surprised at the judgemental posters here, you guys ask for understanding about abortion and other topics but have ZERO understanding, empathy and compassion about immigrants in the U.S., Trump's presidency really is showing everyone's true colors.

I sincerely hope none of you have to go through a situation where you have to leave your country without papers because you're running away from a dangerous state, because you are dying of hunger or because your child or relative is dying and there's no medicines (or anything really). 

[WiseGirl]

16 hours ago, FundieCentral said:

I also really don’t understand why Derrick is so concerned about other people’s families and tweets at them on Twitter all day. Doesn’t he have his own to look after? 

Surely you jest. That's Jilly's job. His is to grift, annoy the hell out of many of us, and be a self righteous asshole that tweets all day .... hmmm kind of brings to mind someone else I know of ....

@3splenty your story of your experience working at long-term care made me laugh and laugh. Rufus bless you and all others working in this field. 

[Illmarryyoujana]

1 hour ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

Sadly, we're not much of a free country anyway. 

https://www.usnews.com/news/best-countries/articles/2016-11-29/these-are-the-freest-countries-in-the-world 

 

 

Free enough to speak the language of ones choosing. People who normally don’t like other languages being spoken tend to think of us as free and great. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

I've been to many countries, and have heard languages other than English in England, German in Germany, Polish in Poland, Italian in Italy, French in France, etc.  

The USA is poorly ranked on many criteria.

https://www.usnews.com/news/best-countries/overall-full-list  

[Illmarryyoujana]

1 minute ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I've been to many countries, and have heard languages other than English in England, German in Germany, Polish in Poland, Italian in Italy, French in France, etc.  

The USA is poorly ranked on many criteria.

https://www.usnews.com/news/best-countries/overall-full-list  

Those are all free countries, so that makes sense. I know the US is poorly rated on things. That doesn’t change that people have the right to speak whatever language they want to.