Dillards 50: The big 5-0!

[Georgiana]

1 minute ago, Carm_88 said:

Chocolate milk AND a foot rub?  

I was leaning towards "make a mess in the kitchen while Jill does all the actual work of parenting", but that also sounds very romantic!

[SassyPants]

On 2/11/2018 at 10:09 PM, CorruptionInc. said:

That's good you like to dance Derick. Does your wife and her family know that?

Wouldn't that have been covered on the 50 page questionnaire?

[nastyhobbitses]

1 hour ago, JillyO said:

Fundamentalist Christians in general, and the Dillards in particular, have a history of trying to indoctrinate people - especially vulnerable populations - with their religious bullshit while pretending to help them/do something nice for them. Playing with brown kids in Central American orphanages for a day for the photo ops, handing out Thanksgiving food to poor families only after they've suffered through a service at their church, etc. So I think it's definitely fair to question whether this Night to Shine thing is legitimate or not, and I'll freely admit that I had the same thoughts as @nastyhobbitses when I first saw the post. I don't see where she was saying that people with intellectual disabilities can't make decisions for themselves. Just that the Dillards are known to try to indoctrinate people with their fundamentalist Christianity any chance they get, and they especially seem to like doing this to people they consider vulnerable (such us poor families in the US, homeless people, orphans, generally brown people in Latin America).

If people who know the Night to Shine charity say that it's legitimate and not exploitative of people with intellectual disabilities, then that's great. I am genuinely happy to hear that! However, I still think it's important to question basically every organization people like the Dillards support, because they have shown time and time again that they support the most horrible of causes and are extremely exploitative in what they do. If this isn't one of those times, then that's great!

My thoughts exactly. If they're legit and they're not exploiting disabled people, all good by me. Though can I still be a Negative Nancy and put up my middle fingers to Derick for supporting an event for disabled people while supporting and voting for politicians who will, given the chance, gleefully yank away those people's healthcare? 

[nst]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

Wouldn't that have been covered on the 50 page questionnaire?

maybe there was an addendum added after Izzy was born ?

[SapphireSlytherin]

I just saw Jill's Instagram. Her lock screen on her phone is D-wreck's face.

I may have thrown up in my mouth a little.

[mizandry]

1 hour ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I just saw Jill's Instagram. Her lock screen on her phone is D-wreck's face.

I may have thrown up in my mouth a little.

I hear you.

You know, it's one thing to know in theory that this is Jill's husband... entirely another to have a moment of, oh god, that's her husband. 

[nastyhobbitses]

1 hour ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I just saw Jill's Instagram. Her lock screen on her phone is D-wreck's face.

I may have thrown up in my mouth a little.

If her phone were mine, I'd never be able to unlock it because I'd keep swiping left. 

[JillyO]

Here's the picture people are talking about (I'll put it under a spoiler tag in case anyone is eating ):

Spoiler

 

Just... why? Even if she genuinely believes that that's a good picture of Derick, why would she post something like that publically? They were clearly lying in bed when she took this picture, FFS. These people are seriously SO clueless.

[EmmieJ]

On 2/12/2018 at 6:20 AM, HereticHick said:

Title of next chapter:  Dillards: I've Always Danced, Bro!

Dancing around the truth doesn't count, bro.

[BabyBottlePop]

Why did she post that? Why did she want us to know that's what her lock screen looks like? And then the photo of him with Israel after it. I don't get it. 

[CorruptionInc.]

4 minutes ago, BabyBottlePop said:

Why did she post that? Why did she want us to know that's what her lock screen looks like? And then the photo of him with Israel after it. I don't get it. 

To try and prove her husband is loveable?!

[brusselsgriffon]

When I saw that picture of Jill’s lock screen I initially thought it was from some fundie snark instagram. And I don’t even follow any! 

[luv2laugh]

I’m not sure if the events themselves are exploitative but I do know that some people volunteer in these events and go on mission-cations with exploitative intentions such as padding their resume to get into grad schools, medical school, law school, top MBA school, etc. It’s very rare that I see people serving the needy, and even giving money for that matter, these days without some sort of incentive for themselves. 

It is sad but I see many people volunteering, giving money, sitting on boards for reasons such as:

What is in it for me?

Will this make me look “good”?

Will it help me get into a top program?

Will this count for my service hours?

Will it help give me a new market to shill Plexus or meet business sales prospects?

How many likes will this get me on FB/instagram?

Will I earn points with God?

Are free drinks involved?

If I give money, will my name be “in lights”?

Rather than condemn the organizations and events themselves, I frown upon people who do this solely for these reasons in mind. No matter what kind of charity event is put on, there is NO way to stop these exploitative selfish people from infiltrating unfortunately.

[Carm_88]

53 minutes ago, CorruptionInc. said:

To try and prove her husband is loveable?!

Derick could be the best looking guy in the world and he still wouldn't be loveable; he's rotten on the inside. 

[lizzybee]

The lock-screen pose is just squicky to me. Almost like something that's just meant for the spouse's eyes only or something. I mean, good heavens, I'm glad she's into her husband because he's her husband. But I wish she wouldn't have shared. Not saying it's meant to be sexual, but to me it feels oddly sexual. I can't put my finger on why but it's just...squicky. 

[patsymae]

Of two minds on this--first mind: iff their intentions suck, but they are actually helping people in a quiet way and not being assholes to the people being helped, then that's a good thing for maybe a not so great seaon

Second mind: As a career reporter and newspaper editor, can't tell you how many times got the call to "send a photographer" (like it's 1974 on the Lou Grant show and tons of them are just sitting around waiting for the call) because they/their church/their kid is handing something to a poor person and wants it in the paper (you print the bad news, so why not this good news?). I never once send a photographer or reporter, and would only run the story if it were in advance and there was an opportunity for people who might want to contribute to do so.
I don't know about Tebow's night except as I said what I saw in another group, and what I learned here, but--and this actually goes against my personal grain--if people want to put their religious beliefs in actual service to other people (not Duggar-type service, real service), than go to it.
For example, St. Jude's Children's Hospital was created expressly as the expression of Danny Thomas's Catholic religious beliefs. He said he had prayed to St. Jude, for Catholics the patron of lost causes, and as is traditional in that system promised a public "thank you" if it came to pass. For example, you see, or used to when there were print newspapers, personal ads thanking St. Jude. In Danny Thomas's case he created that medical center.

Who am I to judge?

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

4 hours ago, patsymae said:

 

For example, St. Jude's Children's Hospital was created expressly as the expression of Danny Thomas's Catholic religious beliefs. He said he had prayed to St. Jude, for Catholics the patron of lost causes, and as is traditional in that system promised a public "thank you" if it came to pass. For example, you see, or used to when there were print newspapers, personal ads thanking St. Jude. In Danny Thomas's case he created that medical center.

Who am I to judge?

Danny Thomas!  One of my most favorite people.  Love him.

[CorruptionInc.]

6 hours ago, luv2laugh said:

I’m not sure if the events themselves are exploitative but I do know that some people volunteer in these events and go on mission-cations with exploitative intentions such as padding their resume to get into grad schools, medical school, law school, top MBA school, etc. It’s very rare that I see people serving the needy, and even giving money for that matter, these days without some sort of incentive for themselves. 

It is sad but I see many people volunteering, giving money, sitting on boards for reasons such as:

What is in it for me?

Will this make me look “good”?

Will it help me get into a top program?

Will this count for my service hours?

Will it help give me a new market to shill Plexus or meet business sales prospects?

How many likes will this get me on FB/instagram?

Will I earn points with God?

Are free drinks involved?

If I give money, will my name be “in lights”?

Rather than condemn the organizations and events themselves, I frown upon people who do this solely for these reasons in mind. No matter what kind of charity event is put on, there is NO way to stop these exploitative selfish people from infiltrating unfortunately.

I have a cousin (not school age - she was born in the 70's.) 

She does Voluntourism where she does 1 day of mission work and spends the next few weeks on vacation. 

It has been done several times now. She always has a "fundraiser" at her house before hand to raise money for her trip the people she is helping.

She could never afford to go overseas / travel when her kids were younger but now they are adults / teenagers she goes away a lot. She has plenty of money but chooses not to spend her own...

[feministxtian]

A dear friend of mine has a daughter with some disabilities. She's mainstreamed into a regular public high school but has NEVER been asked to a dance or prom. Night To Shine is HER night to feel like a regular, now 18 year old kid. She was crowned queen at their dance. Her family is sort of religious but not fundy-religious, B  (the mom) can probably outcuss me! P has faced a lot of adversity in her young life...she knows she's different from her older brothers who all went to a college prep private high school and the 2 that have finished college have big time professional careers. P knows she isn't the same as her brothers and has problems with that. I've known P, her mom and her family well, since, before P was born. 

[victoriasponge]

One of my dear friends got taken into the voluntourism thing before she became religious but has doubled down on it since her conversion. It’s such a shame because she also does loads of good putting her faith into practice. But raising thousands to then mostly spend it on air fare doesn’t count as volunteering to me. I’d much rather that money goes to grass roots organisations in the countries she’s been to (Kenya, Thailand and Zambia off the top of my head) than on her getting her orphan photos and a chance to pose with elephants who, since I’m cynical, probably are only in that sanctuary for the ‘volunteer’ profits. 

Needless to say, I haven’t donated to her. Though sometimes have donated to the grass roots organisations she’s supported as an alternative. Plus I don’t like the way she now sees it as a mission possibility. Firstly Africa already has lots of Christians, and secondly, non-Christian Africans would much rather, I’m sure, we put money into fighting global warming and other disasters than converting them. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

8 hours ago, CorruptionInc. said:

She always has a "fundraiser" at her house before hand to raise money for her trip the people she is helping.

Oh hey - what a great idea! I think I'll do this before my next trip to England, under the guise of charity. Accepting suggestions, but betting Jameson Distillery or Windsor Castle would appreciate it if I managed to pick up a piece of litter while I was there, right?

[PennySycamore]

@SapphireSlytherin, won't you need to take a detour to Ireland if you're going to pick up litter at Jameson Distillery? Reminds me that I need to get a fifth soon.  St Paddy's Day is coming up!

[SapphireSlytherin]

14 minutes ago, PennySycamore said:

@SapphireSlytherin, won't you need to take a detour to Ireland if you're going to pick up litter at Jameson Distillery? Reminds me that I need to get a fifth soon.  St Paddy's Day is coming up!

Yep, we're actually "hopping through" Dublin on the way to the Royal Wedding. hahaha  

[Eternalbluepearl]

5 hours ago, victoriasponge said:

Firstly Africa already has lots of Christians, and secondly, non-Christian Africans would much rather, I’m sure, we put money into fighting global warming and other disasters than converting them. 

Seriously, what is it that people don't get about these two points? This should be a message that is spread far and wide. I fail to see how converting someone (or attempting to) is helpful in any way. Do something of actual value for goodness sake!

[nst]

Hold the phone...who is going to the royal wedding - I so want to go lol