Bro Gary Hawkins Part 2: Saved and Eating Weens, Like a MAN!

[Coy Koi]

3 minutes ago, Spanger said:

The red weenie in ME make it more pink - kills me every time!  It gets stuck in my head on loop though, almost like a prayer.

Same here! I'll be out in public and randomly think of it and have to try not to start laughing to myself like a weirdo. It got even worse when our anonymous sis blessed us with the post about it on the parody page.

I wonder what Ween Gobbler himself would make of all this. Imagine saying some trivial thing on your FB page and you weren't even trying to be funny, and then finding out that a bunch of strangers have been obsessed with it for months. It would be weird!

[Lurky]

Just read his latest post, and literally laughed out loud.  Who's the least transparent about grifting, Gary, Jill Rod or John Shrader?

Quote

Ok folks it's Sunday Morning. It's time to get up and go to Church. Hope you will be in your place today. Let's go see what the LORD has for us today in Church. And you Pastors and Churches if the LORD would lead y'all to talk to the People of GOD about being a Blessing to the Hawkins Family Ministry with a one time love offering to help with the bus it would be great appreciated. Pray and see the LORD on HIS will in this matter. Have a great day in Church.

So please pray that you are lead to ask your congregation to GIVE ME MONEY?

Actually, he makes J Shrader look subtle!  Shrader's latest, from here:

Quote

“The mark of a great church is not its seating capacity, but its sending capacity." 

 

[TheWayTheWorldWorks]

Ok folks.  A one time love offering?    I'm laughing like a loon waiting for paint at Lowe's.

Sis World Works (no clue of birth weight)

[MayMay1123]

ok folks

this morning my church had a beautiful outdoor service, among the birds and flowers...and dogs barkbarkbarking...and extremely loud jets circling over and over before the eagles game...but any way...my pastor said that he is thankful that he woke up this morning, able to walk and hear and see...and then...he said 'except the words are getting weenie and i need glasses'...i swear i almost lost it...but somehow i was able to contain myself

sis may, birther to a 10 pounder too (smaller, but still 10.1...he was my last, thank you very much!)

[FundieFarmer]

Ok folks,
Holy weens.  Every. Damn. Post.  Non stop grifting.  I'd never know he's a preacher!  What a ween.  Bad ween, no gravy.
Sis. Beermeet

Nooooo Sis Beermeet I'm gonna start saying things like "Holy Weens" and "Bad Ween, No Gravy" all the time and no one will get it! [emoji23][emoji23][emoji24][emoji24]

Sis FF

[Beermeet]

9 minutes ago, FundieFarmer said:

Nooooo Sis Beermeet I'm gonna start saying things like "Holy Weens" and "Bad Ween, No Gravy" all the time and no one will get it!

Sis FF

Oh sis. FF,

I got the weens bad in my head.  It just comes out!  Never in my life did something stick so quickly!  Same with my husband and kids ( who honestly never join me in fundie obsession, they think I'm weird!),  same with just about anyone on this thread!  It's unreal.  Hysterical.  Pure comedy.

May the weens be with you,

Sis. Beermeet 

[Beermeet]

3 hours ago, Coy Koi said:

 

I wonder what Ween Gobbler himself would make of all this. Imagine saying some trivial thing on your FB page and you weren't even trying to be funny, and then finding out that a bunch of strangers have been obsessed with it for months. It would be weird!

So weird!  I think I'd laugh but stay hidden!  I cannot imagine what bro. Ween would think!  He'd most likely ask us for money, lol!  How about Mrs.  Ween's reaction?!  It's a lot to think about.....I need me some man food for that!

Sis. Beermeet 

ETA:  Ween Gobbler! 

[FundieFarmer]

I sent all this over to Mr. FF and the following ensued:

 

Mr. FF is a very good ween.

 

ETA: I just realized how that could be taken? *RITWL* (Rolling In The Weens Laughing)

[formergothardite]

I haven't introduced my husband to Mr Good Weens. He knows about Ken Alexander and Jill Rod, but I'm not sure I want to start bringing up weens in ME makes the gravy pink. 

[chaotic life]

Way behind but wanted to say my doctoral writing was under 30 pages. However, that is inherent nature of a clinical degree in which you do a massive clinical project and then get forced to condense it down into a publishable SQUIRE manuscript. And I struggled mightily to condense something so huge into so brief a manuscript. If I ever lose my mind and add the PhD to the DNP I will have to write way more and I know it.

Know what I don't know? How many actual graduate level credit hours I racked up. None of my terms fit in a neat 3 hour per course package and it was all goal oriented not individual course oriented.

[MarblesMom]

4 hours ago, TheWayTheWorldWorks said:

Ok folks.  A one time love offering?

I think I did this one night in college.... at least that is how I remember it.

Pretty sure it wasn't Bro Gary, tho.

[Grimalkin]

      I'm not sure I understand this post.

     Is he shaming people into giving him money? Christ on a cracker.

     I like how he calls it a 'challenge' like it's a contest.  he should start a YouTube pink ween eating challenge.

[Coy Koi]

4 hours ago, Beermeet said:

So weird!  I think I'd laugh but stay hidden!  I cannot imagine what bro. Ween would think!  He'd most likely ask us for money, lol!  How about Mrs.  Ween's reaction?!  It's a lot to think about.....I need me some man food for that!

Unlike J-Rod, I think he does have some understanding of humor as a concept, but he'd probably be baffled about what we heathens found so amusing about his perfectly normal posts about good weens and such.

As for Becky, I always wonder if she's embarrassed of him. I don't see anything to show she is, but I also don't see how she could not be. Not that she's any prize, but she seems out of his league, or at least she used to be! Surely she'd at least understand some of our jokes, even if she didn't appreciate them.

47 minutes ago, Grimalkin said:

I'm not sure I understand this post.

Is he shaming people into giving him money? Christ on a cracker.

I like how he calls it a 'challenge' like it's a contest.  he should start a YouTube pink ween eating challenge.

Definitely shaming. My favorite is the one where he says:

Quote

So with that being said there's been lot's of Blessing's on the Hawkins Family Ministry Thanks be to GOD and HIS Children that obeyed HIM about given.

He keeps going back and forth between acting like there could be at least some very remote possibility that God MAY not be commanding EVERYONE to give him money, and saying you're definitely disobeying God if you don't.

If someone approached me and told me they challenged me to give them my money I'd wonder if I was being robbed or what.

[General Jinjur]

11 hours ago, MarblesMom said:

I think I did this one night in college.... at least that is how I remember it.

Pretty sure it wasn't Bro Gary, tho.

Ok sis, .

[Candydandy]

Mornin Folks This thread is gettin dangerous to my health- mental that is. Yesterday I dropped some freshly folded laundry on the floor. My normal reaction would be @&$! But I actually  muttered beans and weens!  True story that is. Now maybe someone could give me a love offering in the form of a spa getaway- that's be real nice! 

Well folks enjoy the day it is a beauty outside sun's a shinin!

Sis Candy 

[church_of_dog]

30 minutes ago, Candydandy said:

Now maybe someone could give me a love offering in the form of a spa getaway- that's be real nice! 

OK folk,

My G-Hawese is still not so good but I thinks this is what yure askin' four?

Spoiler

 

[Yogi]

How is it that he cannot put a coherent sentence together but repeatedly uses the word 'monies' correctly??

[griffin]

I can't believe I'm this stupid, but I can't find where to make a suggestion for a thread name. Help??

[ViolaSebastian]

Ok folks, at work today and came across a great charity that gives Halloween costumes to disadvantaged kiddos. The name? Ween Dream. I snorted. 

[MayMay1123]

8 minutes ago, ViolaSebastian said:

Ok folks, at work today and came across a great charity that gives Halloween costumes to disadvantaged kiddos. The name? Ween Dream. I snorted. 

they're everywhere! weens are taking over the world! everybody hide!

sis may...<if you see me running, you better run too cuz something awful is chasing me!>

[Spanger]

3 hours ago, church_of_dog said:

OK folk,

My G-Hawese is still not so good but I thinks this is what yure askin' four?

  Reveal hidden contents

 

I was totally expecting this to be a flyer for JRod's Stonewall Jackson PEACE Ladies' Retreat.  

[Candydandy]

3 hours ago, church_of_dog said:

OK folk,

My G-Hawese is still not so good but I thinks this is what yure askin' four?

  Hide contents

 

That there spa getti looks real fine but I had my mind on one of those fancy spas I think Spanger hit the nail on my head- what is better than a relax retreat with Plexus boat rude and speakings by Jill Love offerings please may hap it's not too late to sign up 

Sis Candy lookin fer Serenity now!!

[Red Jumper]

55 minutes ago, griffin said:

I can't believe I'm this stupid, but I can't find where to make a suggestion for a thread name. Help??

Sis, you are not stupid: There is no place to suggest thread names.

If it's a mega-thread, it's up to the helpmeet/admin in charge of that mega-thread. A mega-thread has a number and is the next part of another thread of this topic. So let's say, "WeenBro 24: Still no commas" is nearing 25 pages (depending on inserted media, it might be only 20 pages), Destiny will lock it, link to part 25 and come up with a name for 25. She may or may not use a phrase from within. She may come up with something else. It's not something we commoners need to think about.

'@'helpmeets and @'admins: thanks for making it so efficient that we can keep snarking on Weens and important stuff without endless discussion on the next title.

If you start a thread about a new topic, you need to come up with a suitable title. I remember, there is a tip on how to not choose a title on one of the help pages. I don't rember where though and being on 6 year old mobile doesn't make search an easy task. Perhaps Rufus will answer your prayers if you are less lazy than I am and work yourself through 32 result pages for "thread title". It basically says, write what this thread is about, not just "I can'believe this" or similar.

If you think about opening a new thread in one of the subforums, think carefully if it can't be part of the latest megathread. This also has been discussed a lot including recently,so the search function will help you to avoid putting you foot into something.

When still insecure, ask in the newbe-forum SoDRT. There more experienced memberes know that we ask stupid questions all the time and provide answers patiently (been there, done that - the stupid, not the useful answer).

 

Now I hope that Rufus has blessed me to not write some BS. Please correct if I was wrong on anything.

[TheWayTheWorldWorks]

@church_of_dog, I think this is what you were looking for:

Spoiler

And the following I found is truly terrifying:

Spoiler

Sis World Works

[Dandruff]

6 hours ago, Yogi said:

How is it that he cannot put a coherent sentence together but repeatedly uses the word 'monies' correctly??

I'm sure that Mr. Weenie-muncher has had lots and lots of practice using the word.