Maxhell- Summer with the Maxwells Pt 3

[delilahdog11]

I SERIOUSLY doubt that it was not just the weekly talks that maintained thd bond between Sarah & Steve. More that she isn't allowed to move out of his home or to talk to anyone that isn't family. 

My theory is that teri's depression made it impossible for Steve to be away from the house, but I don't think being at home lined up with his what his picture of what a real man looks like. So he turned to a stricter, more legalistic version of Christianity to defend his manhood. Now he was doing what God calls all men to do. To be the controlling, dominate, protector of the home. 

And I agree that Steve probably whited out, Row Row Your Boat lyrics, because they say life is but a dream. Life is anything but it is the thunder dome of cold hard reality where you have to prove you worthiness to get into heaven. 

[Snarfblatt]

Steve got a bible from Teri for his birthday. I wonder how many bibles Steve must have at this point. I realize that there are lots of different versions of it but something tells me Steve is not comparing versions. 

Also great cream cheese cherry something? Great description there Sarah. 

[VodouDoll]

"Eh, get him another Bible. He'll like it."

[Coconutwater]

Whoa! Hold the phone, I thought birthdays were selfish and you shouldn't be spoiled??? Guess the rules change if you're the Lord of your own home...

[Jana814]

6 minutes ago, Coconutwater said:

Whoa! Hold the phone, I thought birthdays were selfish and you shouldn't be spoiled??? Guess the rules change if you're the Lord of your own home...

Exactly it's fine to spoil Steve. But it's not a good idea to spoil the kids. Also for Steve they must celebrate his birthday on that day where as the kids it's fine to do it on another day it group them all together. 

[nokidsmom]

5 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

<snip>

No, no, no!  The Holy schedule cured Teri's depression!  That, OTC progesterone cream, prayer, and giving up all responsibility for decision making to the Lord  Steve.

Actually, speaking from experience, keeping to the schedule probably did help a bit with functioning during the depression.  Force yourself out of bed,  go on auto-pilot,  watch the clock or set a reminder to move to the next activity - or remind the children to move on to the next activity.

I personally don't think Teri is depressed these days, although obviously she was deeply depressed in the past.  A bit detached, introverted (which is not a character flaw), avoiding conflict at all costs, and letting others take care of things but she seems pretty functional to me.  Just overly rigid and dependent on the schedule that helped her in the past.

Oh, that's right, it was indeed that Holy Schedule that cured her.   Yep, that's it.

Seriously, though, you make a good point that the structure of having the schedule probably helped her keep on track but I note that the end result is that she lets others take care of things and even now it appears to me that she's still reliant on the schedule.   It implies that her stability might be dependent on it and the reason why it works is that others, such as her adult kids and yes, even Steve himself, have been trained to step in and take care of things.  On one hand, I suppose who am I to argue if it works as people can find their own ways to cope but OTOH, it's come at such a cost to her kids. 

[uber frau]

3 hours ago, VodouDoll said:

"Eh, get him another Bible. He'll like it."

The old one is probably falling apart from overuse.

[johnhugh]

4 hours ago, uber frau said:

The old one is probably falling apart from overuse.

With pages stuck together ;-)

[Jessie E]

Just checked out their blog again and read up on Steve's birthday.  Looked like a real bar burner!  Something somewhat exciting has to happen in this family soon.  Their  blog is a cure for insomnia.  

Suggestion for a title on the next thread: The Maxwells, Ultimate Camera Whores! 

[SPHASH]

Who's the dark haired little girl in the pictures.  I think she is their friends Dave and Liz the missionaries daughter.

[kpmom]

32 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Who's the dark haired little girl in the pictures.  I think she is their friends Dave and Liz the missionaries daughter.

Isn't that Christina?

[delilahdog11]

No matter how many times I see Drew outfitted in the hazmat eating suit. I am still baffled by it. 

It isn't like he is having to bob for his two animal crackers. 

[Mela99]

On 8/3/2016 at 4:35 PM, AmazonGrace said:

It's much easier when  you don't have to speak with the humanoids who inhabit the same dwelling with you. 

I'm just here to say I was lurking and I was really sure you said 'with the hemorrhoids' and I thought, well, that's apropo here. 

[iweartanktops]

On 8/8/2016 at 6:49 AM, AmazonGrace said:

It seems  somewhat contradictory to say he always took the time and then go on to say there was one meeting once a week when  the kids could share their thoughts.   I dunno... couldn't he have talked with them during the daily scheduled meals or something?

 

 

I'm late, but I just wanted to point out that at least they got to hear Steve's heart for them on a regular basis through the Daddy Tapes.

[AmazonGrace]

5 minutes ago, iweartanktops said:

I'm late, but I just wanted to point out that at least they got to hear Steve's heart for them on a regular basis through the Daddy Tapes.

Eh... this is funny and tragic at the same time. 

 

Quote

There is an exceptional bonding that goes on when a child hears his daddy’s voice frequently.

On a recording. While daddy is not there. And never bothers to update the recording.

That is not bonding. Bonding requires interaction. 

Quote

Let me tell you why those tapes meant so much to my little children. For thirty minutes, they would hear me as I shared my heart with that one particular child, calling him by name. I talked to him heart-to-heart and told him things I wanted him to know. I told him how much I loved him and how important he was to me.

What a shitty thing to do to leave one child out. 

[16strong]

20 hours ago, VodouDoll said:

"Eh, get him another Bible. He'll like it."

A wonderfully passive-aggressive way to say "fuck you and you birthday, Steve." I say drown him in KJV's for the rest of his wretched life.

[fundiefan]

A bible for his birthday? That's quite the shocker. I never would have guessed Teri would go for that. It's so unMaxwellian.

Alternately, it's the most predictable,  Maxwellian gift ever and the only thing that would make it better would be a cover to go with it.

My mother just turned 70 over the weekend. We took her to the theater and out to dinner. Her husband took her to dinner and sent her and my aunt off for a day of pampering. Two of my nephews took her to the fair - no balloons or face painting involved.

I'm betting my mother is just as glad she isn't a Maxwell as I have always been.

[Jana814]

My father just turned 70. His favorite kind of meal is brunch. We had about 14 people and went to his favorite place for his favorite meal. It was great!  

[CyborgKin]

My parents do (loosely) sheduled weekly meetings with my siblings and I.  When they remember.  I'm on Friday night, so they don't always get around to it, or just forget.  I generally find the concept stressful.  And lately it mostly consists of them grilling me about the progress of my self employment and offering unsolicited advice.  As if I couldn't ask for advice on my own initiative if I needed to.

[iweartanktops]

4 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

Eh... this is funny and tragic at the same time. 

 

On a recording. While daddy is not there. And never bothers to update the recording.

That is not bonding. Bonding requires interaction. 

What a shitty thing to do to leave one child out. 

I think the whole Daddy Tape thing is fucking crazy. I feel like it's basically brainwashing. Seriously. If you want to teach your children, and help them work on their character, you can show them by example, and spend time with them. You can also discuss different things with them, and why they're important. But I guess that might require some critical thinking.

 I'm so creeped out by this. I'll never get over it. 

[FloraDoraDolly]

12 hours ago, kpmom said:

Isn't that Christina?

Yes, it looks like Christina with crooked bangs.

[lauraloralara]

13 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

...snip...

What a shitty thing to do to leave one child out. 

I completely agree. I don't remember who it was that didn't get the Daddy Tape (Anna?), but especially when you grow up in the cultish freakshow that is the Maxwell home, where your father controls everything and is the center of everything, it would be incredibly painful (IMO) not to get one of those stupid tapes, stupid though they may be. It might not scar you for life, but I think it would definitely have some kind of emotional consequence on you. ("You" in a general sense.)

[AmazonGrace]

On 9.8.2016 at 5:45 AM, nokidsmom said:

Oh, that's right, it was indeed that Holy Schedule that cured her.   Yep, that's it.

Seriously, though, you make a good point that the structure of having the schedule probably helped her keep on track but I note that the end result is that she lets others take care of things and even now it appears to me that she's still reliant on the schedule.   It implies that her stability might be dependent on it and the reason why it works is that others, such as her adult kids and yes, even Steve himself, have been trained to step in and take care of things.  On one hand, I suppose who am I to argue if it works as people can find their own ways to cope but OTOH, it's come at such a cost to her kids. 

I agree that some sort of structure and routine can help keep track of things and decrease stress levels.  You don't have  to figure out your schedule from scratch every day and routines decrease the cognitive load.  But when the schedule becomes too tight and limiting, say, if the dinner must be on the table at an exact hour every day and you can't  take a minute more of doing whatever you were doing at the time when the bleeper rings to get you cooking, it sounds like it could develop into  another source of stress. I guess it depends on whether the schedule is treated as a guideline or a lawbook.

[Captain Obvious]

On 8/9/2016 at 7:08 PM, johnhugh said:

With pages stuck together ;-)

I had that thought as well!

We are both going to hell. 

[RoseWilder]

Drew looks so much like Steve in the birthday pictures. So that's what Steve's face would look like if he wasn't crazy and soulless. 

It's weird seeing that face and not wanting to slap it.