Nathan (WAS) Courting Ashley (pt. 2)

[Tangy Bee]

12 hours ago, TuringMachine said:

I have a feeling one of Ashley's qualities that the Bates love the most is what she does for their image. "Look! Nathan's dating a girl from New York. Liberal people live there! And look how hip she dresses and talks. See our kids are totally allowed be different"

I just CAN'T believe there are Christian fundies in the Bronx! I grew up visiting family in Brooklyn & the orthodox Jews and Muslims were the only obvious fundies I remember seeing. Hope Ashley has a DL. Not any buses or trains in that part of TN.

[HereticHick]

10 hours ago, Tangy Bee said:

I just CAN'T believe there are Christian fundies in the Bronx! I grew up visiting family in Brooklyn & the orthodox Jews and Muslims were the only obvious fundies I remember seeing. Hope Ashley has a DL. Not any buses or trains in that part of TN.

Oooh--good point. It is very likely that Ashley doesn't have a driver's license.I think I've read that only about 25% of New Yorkers do, and stats show that the amount of young folks nationwide getting licenses has declined significantly in recent years. Of course, this sounds like a PERFECT plot device for a BUB episode--the Bates teach Ashley how to drive. 

[19 cats and counting]

Here's the thing with learning to drive (I have a cousin in the process of learning now).  It is limited to within state borders (my cousin lives in a border area and can't drive across state lines with a permit).  

So would Ashley learn to drive in NY (I suppose they could go upstate and teach her) or would she wait until marriage and learn in TN?

(I'm from the metro NY area and I avoid driving in NYC like the plague, but then again I hate city driving and will avoid it at all costs).

[HereticHick]

4 minutes ago, 19 cats and counting said:

Here's the thing with learning to drive (I have a cousin in the process of learning now).  It is limited to within state borders (my cousin lives in a border area and can't drive across state lines with a permit).  

So would Ashley learn to drive in NY (I suppose they could go upstate and teach her) or would she wait until marriage and learn in TN?

(I'm from the metro NY area and I avoid driving in NYC like the plague, but then again I hate city driving and will avoid it at all costs).

Ohh--another excellent point I hadn't thought about.  I can't imagine learning to drive in the city.  I did a lot of my lessons on the Blue Ridge Parkway--the speed limit is only 45 mph & big trucks aren't allowed!

[QuiverDance]

I'm pretty sure Ashley could learn to drive in Rocky Top, on country roads, without a permit, and no one would bat an eye.  

[19 cats and counting]

48 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

Ohh--another excellent point I hadn't thought about.  I can't imagine learning to drive in the city.  I did a lot of my lessons on the Blue Ridge Parkway--the speed limit is only 45 mph & big trucks aren't allowed!

New York is a big state.  She could easily go to Westchester, Rockland, or Putnam and learn there.  (Avoid Long Island).

Although the roads in Westchester I learned to drive on no longer allow drivers with permits (Saw Mill and Taconic State Parkway).  I had to drive the Taconic from my hometown to Albany before I was allowed to take my road test (2.5 hours).

(For the sake of the TV show, I see the Bates teaching Ashley alongside Josie and Katie).  

[lizzybee]

18 hours ago, 19 cats and counting said:

If you can stomach it, watch her wedding episode "Wedding Bells" on 19 Kids.  (5/6 are on YouTube).  She's definitely grown up since walking down the aisle.

So I went back and watched the clip, my goodness how SURLY Jessa was. I almost didn't recognize her. She was scowling/surly the whole time she wasn't making fun of Ben for thinking the wedding was romantic. I think I forgot old Jessa who didn't have to work so hard to sell her own tv show, I guess back then she was free to be as unpleasant as she wanted and no one cared if it would impact the ratings. 

[Melissa1977]

41 minutes ago, lizzybee said:

So I went back and watched the clip, my goodness how SURLY Jessa was. I almost didn't recognize her. She was scowling/surly the whole time she wasn't making fun of Ben for thinking the wedding was romantic. I think I forgot old Jessa who didn't have to work so hard to sell her own tv show, I guess back then she was free to be as unpleasant as she wanted and no one cared if it would impact the ratings. 

I have never liked Jessa, but there's something real in her expression. She's not good faking nor keeping sweet. She had always that bitchy look. But since she had Spurg, I'm seeing her happy and relaxed. Maybe she's just acting, but if she couldn't act before, I think she's truly happier now. And it's good for Spurg, maybe he'll be less trained  (I hope, but I'm not sure about it).

[lizzybee]

Just now, Melissa1977 said:

I have never liked Jessa, but there's something real in her expression. She's not good faking nor keeping sweet. She had always that bitchy look. But since she had Spurg, I'm seeing her happy and relaxed. Maybe she's just acting, but if she couldn't act before, I think she's truly happier now. And it's good for Spurg, maybe he'll be less trained  (I hope, but I'm not sure about it).

I tend to agree with you. I'm thinking she's just what she is and what she feels is what you see. Especially now that I've seen such a change in her by looking back. I can't fault her for managing to cultivate her own personality regardless of her upbringing. At least she seems happier now. Obviously, I don't know one way or another but the difference is remarkable. 

[TuringMachine]

I would imagine Ashley doesn't have a license. Owning a car in the city is expensive and often unnecessary. I didn't grow up there but I know people who did, and most of them did not get a license until the moved away.  Also being from New Jersey I automatically assume anyone who is from the city is a terrible driver.  We had to deal with them every summer.

3 hours ago, HereticHick said:

Of course, this sounds like a PERFECT plot device for a BUB episode--the Bates teach Ashley how to drive. 

I could so see them doing this. Although considering the Bates kids' driving history, I'm not sure which is scarier. Someone who learned to drive in NYC or someone who learned to drive from one of the Bateses.

[sunshine]

8 minutes ago, TuringMachine said:

I would imagine Ashley doesn't have a license. Owning a car in the city is expensive and often unnecessary. I didn't grow up there but I know people who did, and most of them did not get a license until the moved away.  Also being from New Jersey I automatically assume anyone who is from the city is a terrible driver.  We had to deal with them every summer.

I could so see them doing this. Although considering the Bates kids' driving history, I'm not sure which is scarier. Someone who learned to drive in NYC or someone who learned to drive from one of the Bateses.

Ashley drives since there are pictures of her and sister in the family mini-van and she drove to the Bates house on one of the show. Per the courtship episode, the family does have a mini van.

[JermajestyDuggar]

15 minutes ago, sunshine said:

Ashley drives since there are pictures of her and sister in the family mini-van and she drove to the Bates house on one of the show. Per the courtship episode, the family does have a mini van.

I guess that makes sense. If you have a large family, it's very handy to have multiple drivers. 

[OrchidBlossom]

On 6/2/2016 at 1:16 PM, nelliebelle1197 said:

I find Carlin much more tolerable. Ashley, even in snapshots, seems to be a try-hard.

I agree she's a try-hard but in a way it breaks my heart. Have you ever seen her blog about how she hates cooking but she knows its her place as a woman so she has to pray harder for god to give her contentment? Every time she is on and she starts to get annoying I am reminded of that and how uncomfortable with herself she may be and that eases it a little.

But generally, when I'm not considering that, yeah she's quite annoying.

[Exjw2015deed]

4 hours ago, lizzybee said:

So I went back and watched the clip, my goodness how SURLY Jessa was. I almost didn't recognize her. She was scowling/surly the whole time she wasn't making fun of Ben for thinking the wedding was romantic. I think I forgot old Jessa who didn't have to work so hard to sell her own tv show, I guess back then she was free to be as unpleasant as she wanted and no one cared if it would impact the ratings. 

Idk I like to think Jessa was purely miserable being in the Duggar house. She had to raise children, pack, clean, and share a room with 8 other people. I'm someone who loves my family, but from a distance. I would be overwhelmed and seem hateful. Also, she does have a bolder personality. My sister who is older by 14 months, has always been disobedient and a stubborn child. I'm sure they had to break her will early on, and it had to be straight up abusive. Let's not forget about the abuse from Josh as well, which makes anyone a lot more stand offish. She's bitchy and stank, but a small part, very small, actually felt bad for her. 

I think the same goes for Alyssa. Some people are just not meant to be born as the older ones in quiver full family. However she has chosen to continue to follow that path and wants to adopt many children as well. 

[BeccaGrim]

Pretty sure they're still together.  Watched last night's episode and they mention the courtship as happening. Plus, they're strategically trying to sell Nathan as older and mature now. He climbs the tree. Runs the business. And is the one they call when Gil gets a really bad splinter. He gives his father a pep talk about his bigger operation and offers to let his mother rest and take his father to the hospital. This is imagine Nathan as the husband season. 

[nelliebelle1197]

5 hours ago, OrchidBlossom said:

I agree she's a try-hard but in a way it breaks my heart. Have you ever seen her blog about how she hates cooking but she knows its her place as a woman so she has to pray harder for god to give her contentment? Every time she is on and she starts to get annoying I am reminded of that and how uncomfortable with herself she may be and that eases it a little.

But generally, when I'm not considering that, yeah she's quite annoying.

That is sad

 

[OrchidBlossom]

Just now, nelliebelle1197 said:

That is sad

 

It really is. I think that's why she is so over the top. Trying to convince herself.

[19 cats and counting]

 

Description of upcoming episode.  I'm curious to what Ashley has to say to Gil and Kelly.  

[Fundie Bunny]

5 minutes ago, 19 cats and counting said:

Description of upcoming episode.  I'm curious to what Ashley has to say to Gil and Kelly.  

She is going to ask for nathan's hand in marriage 

[JillyO]

7 hours ago, Fundie Bunny said:

She is going to ask for nathan's hand in marriage 

Good one. That would be hilarious!

I'm sure it'll be some "will you teach me how to be the perfect, content little country fundie wife" crap.

[sunshine]

28 minutes ago, JillyO said:

Good one. That would be hilarious!

I'm sure it'll be some "will you teach me how to be the perfect, content little country fundie wife" crap.

Or, help host the wedding in TN instead of NYC. Now that would be a bummer.

[HereticHick]

18 hours ago, Fundie Bunny said:

She is going to ask for nathan's hand in marriage 

Oh hell to the yes, Ashley!

 

[mango_fandango]

Sorry for thread derailment, but do wedding dresses HAVE to have super duper long skirts? I hate long skirts. I wore one for my school leavers' do and I was so self conscious about tripping over or standing on the skirt and ripping a huge hole. I am NOT about to get married any time soon- I'm single right now - but if I do get married I wouldn't want to be self conscious and uncomfortable. And I suppose I could just get married in a registry office; I'm not religious. At my aunt's wedding she just wore a knee length dress and then when my parents got married Mum just wore smart clothes. (No, my parents were not married when they had me and my brother, and only decided to when dad became ill and kinda had to do so for financial reasons- if dad had died, mum wouldn't have got anything as an unmarried partner. Dad is totally OK though!) But if I wanted to do some fancy location wedding (don't really care where it happened, depends on potential spouse too I guess) it'd be nice to wear a pretty white dress. 

Dont know why I'm so hung up on this when I'm single for the foreseeable future  but just food for thought.

 

[CreationMuseumCurator]

24 minutes ago, mango_fandango said:

Sorry for thread derailment, but do wedding dresses HAVE to have super duper long skirts? I hate long skirts. I wore one for my school leavers' do and I was so self conscious about tripping over or standing on the skirt and ripping a huge hole. I am NOT about to get married any time soon- I'm single right now - but if I do get married I wouldn't want to be self conscious and uncomfortable. And I suppose I could just get married in a registry office; I'm not religious. At my aunt's wedding she just wore a knee length dress and then when my parents got married Mum just wore smart clothes. (No, my parents were not married when they had me and my brother, and only decided to when dad became ill and kinda had to do so for financial reasons- if dad had died, mum wouldn't have got anything as an unmarried partner. Dad is totally OK though!) But if I wanted to do some fancy location wedding (don't really care where it happened, depends on potential spouse too I guess) it'd be nice to wear a pretty white dress. 

Dont know why I'm so hung up on this when I'm single for the foreseeable future  but just food for thought.

There are SO MANY cute short wedding dresses out there! I was planning on a short dress, before I found the one I went with (which had a super long train, oops). Added bonus: you get to buy and showcase really cute shoes.

This prompts on one of my two pieces of wedding planning advice. Your wedding, your decision. Unless your future spouse disagrees, do what you want, and do it unapologetically. (#2 is that if there are kids attending, serve their meals early. That's pretty much the only thing you shouldn't unapologetically do what you want about. Hungry children can be monsters.)

[VelociRapture]

18 minutes ago, CreationMuseumCurator said:

There are SO MANY cute short wedding dresses out there! I was planning on a short dress, before I found the one I went with (which had a super long train, oops). Added bonus: you get to buy and showcase really cute shoes.

This prompts on one of my two pieces of wedding planning advice. Your wedding, your decision. Unless your future spouse disagrees, do what you want, and do it unapologetically. (#2 is that if there are kids attending, serve their meals early. That's pretty much the only thing you shouldn't unapologetically do what you want about. Hungry children can be monsters.)

Your second point is a big reason our cocktail hour was at 4:30 and dinner at 5:30. We had three young kids (two who had meals) and we wanted to make things as smooth as possible for them and their parents. We also gave the kids special gifts - coloring books and crayons for the toddlers and a stuffed animal for the infant. 

That, plus I can't stay awake past 11:00 most nights and I turn into the Hulk when hangry.