Bates Family Part 9

[Fascinated]

If I posted a photo on FB or Instagram and received negative, intrusive comments from strangers, I'd be royally pissed.  I don't see that there is any justification for that just because Alyssa is 'famous'.

Now that we have decided that Alyssa is not pregnant, I'm becoming concerned.  Unless we get an announcement from Michael, Erin, Alyssa, Jill, Jessa or Anna soon, I fear we will run out of snark material. They are simply not behaving as fundie women should!  Dammit. 

[imokit]

1 hour ago, formergothardite said:

I hope Alyssa will realize that her daughter doesn't need to be pushed into the spotlight either by being up on a reality TV show. I'm not sure how often she is on the show, but Gil and Kelly have put her in a difficult position. If she doesn't want her child to be on television, she would have to stand up to them and say that she won't attend family events that are being filmed and they seem to film most big family events. 

It's not all or nothing.  Allie can be at family events while filming, be in the background but not feature.  Or she could feature occasionally. There are plenty of ways for Alyssa and John to play it. And I expect how they do will change with how they feel and how their family is.  And that's good,  that they have boundaries and are negotiating them. 

[paulypepper]

12 hours ago, halcionne said:

Lawson continues to be ridiculously hokey on his youtube channel (that I didn't know he had).

 

I can't watch. I saw snippets on his ig and it was too much.

Okay...I need some help with this. I will say that he is a decent singer and guitar player, but how do they know all of these ebil country songs...not to mention Elvis. I'm guessing the Bates kids are allowed more freedom than the Duggars as to what they can see.listen.to?

[nokidsmom]

8 hours ago, Jigsaw3 said:

Interesting comment thread on Alyssa's Instagram picture of her and Carlin in formals:

That's a pretty strong indictment of life as a reality show child. Alyssa is stating pretty clearly that she did not choose to be on United Bates of America or Bringing Up Bates; she just went along with her parents' decision.

(The topic is discussing Alyssa's physique. I find it pretty revolting in general. Alyssa's waist size, fitness level and nutrition is her business alone. No one would say to her face some of the comments made online; why are they acceptable on Instagram? I'm not happy with the pregnancy speculation here, either.)

To the bolded: it should be obvious to a lot of fans / commenters that she had no choice in the matter.    None of the kids did.  I applaud her for standing up for herself but her statements confirm to me that she really didn't like being on the show. I always got the vibe that by the time she married John, she was over it already.

[VelociRapture]

Regarding Alyssa:

It's sad people feel the need to be so ugly towards others, especially online. I say good for her for standing up for herself. Whether she is or is not healthy is no one's business unless they are Alyssa, her loved ones, or her Doctor. She looks lovely, happy, and confident in those pictures.

Instead of focusing on this young woman's appearance, maybe these assholes should be asking Gil why he helped cover up sexual abuse? Or why Kelly was incapable of consoling her young daughter when Michael got married and moved away?

[formergothardite]

Yes, but if Alyssa and John decided they don't want their child or themselves to be on television at all, Gil and Kelly have put them in a bad position. Personally I wouldn't want to attend family events where a camera crew would be hovering over everyone. and I would appear on television. It reminds me of when one of Anna's relatives didn't want their kids put on television and basically was told that they could miss out of the wedding. I think Gil and Kelly would do that too if any of their kids refused to agree to be on television. I'm sure there is a lot of pressure from Gil and Kelly to allow Allie to be on television just a small bit, even if Alyssa would be more comfortable with her not being on television at all. 

Gil and Kelly didn't give their children choices and probably didn't even stop to consider how their children felt. This was all about money to them. One thing Gil has shown because of this lawsuit is that he worships money and he doesn't care who he hurts to get it. 

[freethemall]

They're dancing in that video! Isn't that against the rules?

[formergothardite]

12 minutes ago, freethemall said:

They're dancing in that video! Isn't that against the rules?

Gill dumped Gothard and helped run with the IBLP empire. They get to make their own rules now and I'm sure those rules will match whatever Gil and Kelly thinks will make them the most money. They are trying very, very hard to look as normal as possible. 

I found Lawson and whoever that was insufferably annoying in that video. 

[singsingsing]

Alyssa may feel that if she doesn't share a little of her life on social media, people will try to sneakily find out what's going on, which would be even worse. So maybe she's just trying to exert some control over what the world sees of herself and her own family. That would line up with her usually only posting posed photos once or twice a week, and her and John supposedly having private instagram accounts.

[MissBitters]

2 hours ago, formergothardite said:

I hope Alyssa will realize that her daughter doesn't need to be pushed into the spotlight either by being up on a reality TV show. I'm not sure how often she is on the show, but Gil and Kelly have put her in a difficult position. If she doesn't want her child to be on television, she would have to stand up to them and say that she won't attend family events that are being filmed and they seem to film most big family events. 

I've noticed Allie doesn't appear that often on the show. Alyssa didn't have a birth special like Erin & Whitney, & there was only a five minute (possibly staged) scene of Gil & Kelly visiting Alyssa after the birth. From what I've seen, Allie is kept more in the background whenever she's at family events. It looks like Alyssa & John are trying their best to limit her exposure on TV. 

[Thorns]

23 minutes ago, MissBitters said:

I've noticed Allie doesn't appear that often on the show. Alyssa didn't have a birth special like Erin & Whitney, & there was only a five minute (possibly staged) scene of Gil & Kelly visiting Alyssa after the birth. From what I've seen, Allie is kept more in the background whenever she's at family events. It looks like Alyssa & John are trying their best to limit her exposure on TV. 

That might also be because of John's father. I'm guessing they have had several talks with a media advisor/PR person both before and after the wedding. 

[19 cats and counting]

24 minutes ago, MissBitters said:

I've noticed Allie doesn't appear that often on the show. Alyssa didn't have a birth special like Erin & Whitney, & there was only a five minute (possibly staged) scene of Gil & Kelly visiting Alyssa after the birth. From what I've seen, Allie is kept more in the background whenever she's at family events. It looks like Alyssa & John are trying their best to limit her exposure on TV. 

It also just happened to be that Allie's birth was within days of Michael and Brandon's engagement, so the ring took the spotlight.

I think Alyssa does maintain a healthy balance of distance.  As for social media--- she posts less than many people her age do. 

[actuallyjessica]

I find Lawson to be very handsome and charming in that video.

The fundies were right! Secular music and dancing leads to desires that cannot righteously be fulfilled.

Whoops.

[Jana814]

20 minutes ago, Thorns said:

That might also be because of John's father. I'm guessing they have had several talks with a media advisor/PR person both before and after the wedding. 

I was thinking of that also. That it might have to do with his father. 

[jcanglin991]

I think Alyssa is walking a fine line between having her own private life and supporting her parents and  the rest of the family. She knows how expensive it is to raise that many kids and if the show helps her younger siblings I guess she will go along with it. She seems to be doing it on her own terms, unlike the Duggar girls who think the only way to live is on tv. The Bates kids seem to be better equipped to live adult lives away from the camera.

[19 cats and counting]

9 minutes ago, jcanglin991 said:

I think Alyssa is walking a fine line between having her own private life and supporting her parents and  the rest of the family. She knows how expensive it is to raise that many kids and if the show helps her younger siblings I guess she will go along with it. She seems to be doing it on her own terms, unlike the Duggar girls who think the only way to live is on tv. The Bates kids seem to be better equipped to live adult lives away from the camera.

It also happens to help that she lives far away.  It will be interesting to see if the Keilens are on the show as much now that the wedding and honeymoon (presumably that UP helped pay for) are over.  

[freethemall]

1 hour ago, formergothardite said:

Gill dumped Gothard and helped run with the IBLP empire. They get to make their own rules now and I'm sure those rules will match whatever Gil and Kelly thinks will make them the most money. They are trying very, very hard to look as normal as possible. 

I found Lawson and whoever that was insufferably annoying in that video. 

That was Trace, and yes he was very obnoxious in that video. Those boys certainly don't "keep sweet" in the way their sisters are expected to.

[Casserole]

56 minutes ago, 19 cats and counting said:

It also just happened to be that Allie's birth was within days of Michael and Brandon's engagement, so the ring took the spotlight.

I think Alyssa does maintain a healthy balance of distance.  As for social media--- she posts less than many people her age do. 

 

Keep in mind that she has a private instagram account for friends and some family so I'm sure she posts normally and whatever she wants there. She keeps a public account for the "fans" and I don't blame her for being fed up with how they treat her for allowing them access to any part of her life. Go Alyssa. 

[nokidsmom]

The Bateseses kids seem better equipped for adult lives namely because they have not have the long running media exposure and associated perks that the Duggars have and therefore are not as reliant on it.   At least not yet but that could change.  

Also consider how much the kids have had to support the family either at home or by working or both.    Lawson is not the only one to have bought groceries or made so-called loans.   I don't doubt for a minute that some time or another, other kids have had to help out with the bills and their working was not because Gil and Kelly were more progressive or lenient or whatever.  It's that they needed the money.    

Re: Alyssa, I agree she's walking a fine line here.  It's clear she does not want the spotlight and has every right to limit her daughter's exposure on TV.  I feel that she should not have be pressured by her family to participate but when it comes to money, her parents will obviously do anything for the Almighty Dollar.  

 It seems that she knows the show is a deal with the devil. 

[formergothardite]

45 minutes ago, jcanglin991 said:

She seems to be doing it on her own terms, unlike the Duggar girls who think the only way to live is on tv. The Bates kids seem to be better equipped to live adult lives away from the camera.

Probably because they haven't lived as much of their lives on reality television as the Duggar kids. Some of the Duggar children have literally been filmed from the time they were born. And the older ones were put on TV at a very impressionable age. Their whole lives and identities were formed around being reality television stars. The oldest Bates kids didn't have that. 

Alyssa didn't seem to enjoy her parents selling her life on television, and she is lucky that it was a relatively short amount of time that she had to put up with it. On the other hand Lawson and Trace and some of the others seem to have been very much sucked into the reality TV lifestyle and I think they will have a much harder time if they had to adjust to life outside of the camera. Does anyone really think Lawson wants to go back to working in the lawn business after having experienced the adoration of reality TV fans? If the lawsuit blows up and their show gets canceled some of these Bates are going to have it rough adjusting  to actual reality instead of the fake reality television. Right now they are getting fame, money and attention for just existing. 

[halcionne]

2 hours ago, paulypepper said:

Okay...I need some help with this. I will say that he is a decent singer and guitar player, but how do they know all of these ebil country songs...not to mention Elvis. I'm guessing the Bates kids are allowed more freedom than the Duggars as to what they can see.listen.to?

The Duggars have always said they stick with classical tunes. For extra self-righteous points! 

I would place the Bateses' familiarity with Elvis Presley and Eddy Arnold in the same category as many fundies' fondness for The Andy Griffith Show (which idk if the Bates family in particular watches). "Oh yes, we love popular culture, as long as it's from fifty years ago." And still carefully curated, of course. I'll be impressed when Lawson performs Big Mama Thornton's version of Hound Dog.

[PennySycamore]

50 minutes ago, freethemall said:

That was Trace, and yes he was very obnoxious in that video. Those boys certainly don't "keep sweet" in the way their sisters are expected to.

All I can say is that "Lawson, you are no Eddy Arnold!  Not even close!"

[Imagine20]

Body shaming Alyssa is terrible. It's terrible to do that to anyone and she is under no obligation to address it or defend herself. Such bullying does nothing to address the issues with Gothardism, and just gives the leg humpers proof that the critics are just mean haters. It's fine to attack and debate ideas, but cyber bullying is never okay. 

[OperaRocks]

8 hours ago, Paperplate said:

I like that Alyssa is speaking up for herself, but if she doesn't like being in the spotlight, why is she publicly posting pictures of herself?

Perhaps the defining line is that she controls the photos. She posts judiciously, selectively, according to her terms. As she married into a visible political family, perhaps there is an expectation of occasional contact?

 

[Granwych]

3 hours ago, actuallyjessica said:

I find Lawson to be very handsome and charming in that video.

The fundies were right! Secular music and dancing leads to desires that cannot righteously be fulfilled.

Whoops.

And we have...sex while upright.....now, there's an oxymoron.