Anna Duggar and the M Kids - Part 5

[gustava]

16 hours ago, patsymae said:

At least Anna will have her slightly more brain-dead sister for company.

Hmmmmm......  Some of us avoid heavy snarking on Priscilla, and we definitely wouldn't describe her as brain dead.  While she may have some degree of developmental delay, she's not mean spirited, is married to headship who is difficult to please, and is doing the best she can with what she's got.

[Catey]

Oh Anna, you finally make it out in public and it is too attend the War Room?

On Valentines Day!!!!!!!!

Quote

 

Spirituality can be a beautiful thing to explore in cinema, but “War Room” has no interest in engaging its audience on a personal level. It has one single goal, which according to the Kendricks, is the only goal worth having. The film wants to evangelize by preaching an ideology that requires its followers to view the world in black-and-white terms. Grappling with the gray areas in life is seen as a sign of weakness, while acting in one’s own best interest is nothing more than a sinful exercise in selfish pride.

This is the lesson that real estate agent Elizabeth (Priscilla C. Shirer) must be taught in extended conversations with her client-turned-friend, Miss Clara (Karen Abercrombie). When Elizabeth tries opening up about the unabashed cruelty she endures on a daily basis from her loathsome husband, Tony (T.C. Stallings), Clara refuses to listen. Instead, she urges the long-suffering wife to go back home, empty out a closet and plaster the walls with Bible verses. There, she will summon God to help fight her battles, thus transforming the space into the titular “war room.” Her role as a submissive woman is to treat the man in her life with grace, which will eventually shame him into becoming a good person. God forbid she even considers a divorce.

 

 

 

Then she calls the wife in the story HER HERO?????

ETA: The wife that spends her time crying and praying for her dickwad husband to change? I get all the reasons why she relates to her I just wish it was not that way. The woman who is working 2 jobs living in a less than perfect home to support her kids on her own away from an abusive husband is MY hero. The legacy implications say it all. Why must they be so predictable?

On VALENTINES day no less she watched this, 

I just am overwhelmed by the martyr fumes..

 

 

[CreationMuseumSeasonPass]

18 hours ago, CorruptionInc. said:

*I cannot believe I am saying this.*

Hopefully the Kardashians do something more "noteworthy" that week so there are no Duggars on the cover.

Fingers crossed that Kanye West goes on another SNL-style rant, bashes Taylor Swift even more and says he more famous than Jesus Christ. It could be titled, "Krazy Kanye Krashes." Now, THAT would get a front page cover over the Duggars and Josh's return.

[sophie10130]

Maybe this Duggar revelation and Kardashian People cover can come the Monday before Super Tuesday! then really no one will care.

[QuiverDance]

Are you kidding?  The Kardashians could find a way to trump Trump in the news, even if one of them had to take video of herself getting peed on by Ray... oh wait.  They've done that already.

[nst]

6 hours ago, Catey said:

Oh Anna, you finally make it out in public and it is too attend the War Room?

On Valentines Day!!!!!!!!

 

 

Then she calls the wife in the story HER HERO?????

ETA: The wife that spends her time crying and praying for her dickwad husband to change? I get all the reasons why she relates to her I just wish it was not that way. The woman who is working 2 jobs living in a less than perfect home to support her kids on her own away from an abusive husband is MY hero. The legacy implications say it all. Why must they be so predictable?

On VALENTINES day no less she watched this, 

I just am overwhelmed by the martyr fumes..

 

 

I told you it would start eventually - the martyr stuff - it's starting late imo 

wait till he gets home 

she will give him endless shit about all this 

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

On 2/17/2016 at 5:57 PM, patsymae said:

I agree. At least Anna will have her slightly more brain-dead sister for company. 

For a while I felt sorry for Anna as it seemed (OK, now I realize it was all staged) that she was really happy in Washington, meeting some Gothard friends (although even I didn't fall for the military-couple at the dinner party), discovering there are such things as public libraries and nice restaurants, wearing some cute clothes ...

but for whatever reason, she seems to want to stay firmly entrenched in the camp. She has siblings who are out and offered to help her so I don't buy total ignorance of the outside world as an excuse. I'm pretty much over Anna now.

I'm not at all surprised. A lot of people, when faced with a major, life altering challenge, either have a complete crisis of faith that causes them to completely shed all aspects of their faith OR they have a huge crisis of faith that causes them to latch onto their faith much more obsessively. My second cousin, like Anna, went the latching onto his faith obsessively route when his daughter died. He went from "CEO (Christmas and Easter Only) Christian" to being so entrenched in his faith I'm surprised he's not getting paid for the promotion of his church and the sermons he preaches all over the internet.

[infooverload]

When I heard the review for War Room on God Awful Movies, they commented on who they thought the target audience is for the movie. Sadly Anna fits their description of the target audience. When they review Christian movies, I usually get a good laugh. I think the hardest movie they have had to review was Loving the Bad Man.

[foreign fundie]

So sad that this is being set up as an example. Why no movie about a cheater husband whose shitty behavior gets him into trouble so he repents, goes into therapy and does all he can to earn back his family's trust? Why is it the victims who have to take responsibility to fix the perpetrator? Who will fix them?

[devoe364]

9 hours ago, DuggarsTheEndIsNear said:

I'm not at all surprised. A lot of people, when faced with a major, life altering challenge, either have a complete crisis of faith that causes them to completely shed all aspects of their faith OR they have a huge crisis of faith that causes them to latch onto their faith much more obsessively. My second cousin, like Anna, went the latching onto his faith obsessively route when his daughter died. He went from "CEO (Christmas and Easter Only) Christian" to being so entrenched in his faith I'm surprised he's not getting paid for the promotion of his church and the sermons he preaches all over the internet.

Something else people need to realize here is that Anna might not be ready.

I am leaving my boyfriend of a year and a half. He got me 30K in debt in that time. He doesn't work. He and his friends ride around in my car and waste my gas and he killed my warranty in less then a year.

You would think those things would have been enough for a smart woman like myself to leave him. 

But I felt trapped, and I am sure that Anna feels trapped.

I felt like there was no way I could possibly dig myself out of this debt - that I needed him to help me. Anna probably feels like there is no way she can possibly raise the "M" kids alone. She probably feels like she needs Josh to help her do this. That she isn't capabble of doing it on her own,

What did it for me? Our lease wasn't renewed, and finding a place to live with an unemployed boyfriend wasn't going to be easy. So, I made a really hard choice and I ended things.

Anna hasn't had her moment yet. I don't think she's stupid, and I don't think her faith is nearly as blind as people here think it is. I think that, like me a few months ago, Anna is still convinced that she can't do this by herself, and that she needs Josh. If he continues to mess up (and I think we can all agree that he will) at some point, Anna is going to either realize that she can do it by herself, or she'll move into the TTH full time. 

[SilverBeach]

On 2/18/2016 at 9:01 AM, gustava said:

Hmmmmm......  Some of us avoid heavy snarking on Priscilla, and we definitely wouldn't describe her as brain dead.  While she may have some degree of developmental delay, she's not mean spirited, is married to headship who is difficult to please, and is doing the best she can with what she's got.

Priss...she is an exception to my no apologetics for adult fundies philosophy. Poor, poor thing. I feel sorry for her the way some people feel sorry for Anna.

[nausicaa]

5 hours ago, devoe364 said:

Something else people need to realize here is that Anna might not be ready.

I am leaving my boyfriend of a year and a half. He got me 30K in debt in that time. He doesn't work. He and his friends ride around in my car and waste my gas and he killed my warranty in less then a year.

You would think those things would have been enough for a smart woman like myself to leave him. 

But I felt trapped, and I am sure that Anna feels trapped.

I felt like there was no way I could possibly dig myself out of this debt - that I needed him to help me. Anna probably feels like there is no way she can possibly raise the "M" kids alone. She probably feels like she needs Josh to help her do this. That she isn't capabble of doing it on her own,

What did it for me? Our lease wasn't renewed, and finding a place to live with an unemployed boyfriend wasn't going to be easy. So, I made a really hard choice and I ended things.

Anna hasn't had her moment yet. I don't think she's stupid, and I don't think her faith is nearly as blind as people here think it is. I think that, like me a few months ago, Anna is still convinced that she can't do this by herself, and that she needs Josh. If he continues to mess up (and I think we can all agree that he will) at some point, Anna is going to either realize that she can do it by herself, or she'll move into the TTH full time. 

Agreed. Embarrassing as it is to admit, if I were in Anna's place, with four little kids and no education or job skills, I'd probably hold my nose and stay with Josh, even if I were no longer religious. I wouldn't be all happy, doting wife but I'd probably try to make some sort of business partnership out of it. I have mad respect for women who step out and rebuild their lives from nothing, but I think I'd just be too scared and overwhelmed.

(Cue my rant about why women should have solid educations and job skills before getting married and having children cause you never know what will happen...)

[BunnyBee]

3 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

Priss...she is an exception to my no apologetics for adult fundies philosophy. Poor, poor thing. I feel sorry for her the way some people feel sorry for Anna.

Prissy gets me too. dammit Pa Keller

[Buzzard]

18 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

Agreed. Embarrassing as it is to admit, if I were in Anna's place, with four little kids and no education or job skills, I'd probably hold my nose and stay with Josh, even if I were no longer religious. I wouldn't be all happy, doting wife but I'd probably try to make some sort of business partnership out of it. I have mad respect for women who step out and rebuild their lives from nothing, but I think I'd just be too scared and overwhelmed.

(Cue my rant about why women should have solid educations and job skills before getting married and having children cause you never know what will happen...)

If I were in Anna's place I'd be on the phone with TMZ, asking who I need to speak to in order to sell my story.

[QuiverDance]

59 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

Agreed. Embarrassing as it is to admit, if I were in Anna's place, with four little kids and no education or job skills, I'd probably hold my nose and stay with Josh, even if I were no longer religious. I wouldn't be all happy, doting wife but I'd probably try to make some sort of business partnership out of it. I have mad respect for women who step out and rebuild their lives from nothing, but I think I'd just be too scared and overwhelmed.

(Cue my rant about why women should have solid educations and job skills before getting married and having children cause you never know what will happen...)

A freaking men.  It is hard even WITH a solid education and job skills.  I cannot IMAGINE doing this without them.  And I spent years trying to "stick it out" out of  a combination of fear and a a sense of obligation.  Not so much religious conviction, but obligation.  And an inability to accept that something I  believed in so strongly was a failure.  

[devoe364]

42 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

Agreed. Embarrassing as it is to admit, if I were in Anna's place, with four little kids and no education or job skills, I'd probably hold my nose and stay with Josh, even if I were no longer religious. I wouldn't be all happy, doting wife but I'd probably try to make some sort of business partnership out of it. I have mad respect for women who step out and rebuild their lives from nothing, but I think I'd just be too scared and overwhelmed.

(Cue my rant about why women should have solid educations and job skills before getting married and having children cause you never know what will happen...)

I have a solid job - two in fact. I work my butt off - I didn't expect my ex to take me to the cleaners financially, I always expected him to step up and help out. I kept thinking I couldn't do it alone - that kept him around for an additional 6 months. Him finally promising that he would help gave him another 2.

Now, I know that the only way it will get done is if I do it by myself.

If Josh continues to misbehave, as my now ex has done, she may find the courage to leave, the way that I did. Or, because of their huge FUNDY community, she may find the support she needs - at least financially and with the kids, from his parents. 

1 hour ago, Buzzard said:

If I were in Anna's place I'd be on the phone with TMZ, asking who I need to speak to in order to sell my story.

If you had asked me before I was in a situation where I thought I couldn't do it alone... I would have said the same. 

Something else to keep in mind - even if Anna were to sell her story, she has no idea how to manage money. 

[QuiverDance]

Maybe not, but she can figure it out.  It's addition and subtraction, not rocket science.  She needs good solid advice, and enough money to last her long enough to get an education.  A nursing degree with a solid specialty could be great for her.  If she made enough to get an education with a proven ROI, she could make it.  

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Being trapped by finances isn't the only reason she'd feel trapped. Remember, this is a cult that shuns those who don't follow the letter of the law, and her parents have been known to distance themselves from her siblings when they've gone away from the church (which is why I think she latched onto her faith instead of shedding it -- it's a lot easier to blindly accept a faith than it is to blindly jump into the unknown without the support system you've become accustomed to; plus, she has 4 kids to think about and likely doesn't want them to be raised without either set of grandparents).

Also, she may still be very much in the denial phase, if she hasn't accepted the blame. It took me actually seeing my ex boyfriend with the girl he was cheating on me with for me to realize that I needed to get the fuck away from him. And it took me a month, even with my friends and family members telling me for 2 months, for me to realize that he was abusive as hell. I mean, he actually hit me. He told me I couldn't see my family because it wasn't convenient for him. He broke up with me because I told him I was spending Christmas in California with my family. He constantly drug me through the mud emotionally and mentally. He took away a lot of things I loved. Etc. I was so far in denial that I dug up the whole "unhealthy communications" chart and was convinced *I* was the abuser. If I, being a person with a great education, who has taken psychology classes in high school and college, who knows about abusive relationships, who has been in previous abusive relationships and known about that, etc, can get trapped so far in denial that it takes me a full month after calling off the relationship to realize that I was abused, how can anyone expect Anna, who has been given few, if any, real opportunities to experience a healthy relationship, to know she's in a situation she needs to distance herself from?

[Buzzard]

What IS the appropriate reaction in fundieland?  Does she get to force him out of her bed? Is she even allowed to question his actions? 

What is it going to be like when he comes home? Will they throw him a big party and make it a celebration, all about the second coming of Joshly? Will they be left alone in the house or will Josh have to move into the dorm?

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

21 minutes ago, Buzzard said:

What IS the appropriate reaction in fundieland?  Does she get to force him out of her bed? Is she even allowed to question his actions? 

What is it going to be like when he comes home? Will they throw him a big party and make it a celebration, all about the second coming of Joshly? Will they be left alone in the house or will Josh have to move into the dorm?

What is appropriate? She has to admit that it's her fault. And, no, under their belief systems she's not allowed to refuse him anything he wants. She may do it, but it won't be sanctioned by their faith.

[Buzzard]

So in about a week she's expected to get back in bed with Josh, fully accepting that his 6 months in Jesus Jail has washed him clean of all his problems and indiscretions.

While he is on parole from Jesus Jail he does what?  He just bops along like he's still the shit?

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

2 minutes ago, Buzzard said:

So in about a week she's expected to get back in bed with Josh, fully accepting that his 6 months in Jesus Jail has washed him clean of all his problems and indiscretions.

While he is on parole from Jesus Jail he does what?  He just bops along like he's still the shit?

Well, it's not like she's just randomly accepting him back into the house. I'm sure that they've been prepping her for when he comes home. She may have even done some married woman equivalent of JttH.

[QuiverDance]

1 hour ago, DuggarsTheEndIsNear said:

Being trapped by finances isn't the only reason she'd feel trapped. Remember, this is a cult that shuns those who don't follow the letter of the law, and her parents have been known to distance themselves from her siblings when they've gone away from the church (which is why I think she latched onto her faith instead of shedding it -- it's a lot easier to blindly accept a faith than it is to blindly jump into the unknown without the support system you've become accustomed to; plus, she has 4 kids to think about and likely doesn't want them to be raised without either set of grandparents).

Also, she may still be very much in the denial phase, if she hasn't accepted the blame. It took me actually seeing my ex boyfriend with the girl he was cheating on me with for me to realize that I needed to get the fuck away from him. And it took me a month, even with my friends and family members telling me for 2 months, for me to realize that he was abusive as hell. I mean, he actually hit me. He told me I couldn't see my family because it wasn't convenient for him. He broke up with me because I told him I was spending Christmas in California with my family. He constantly drug me through the mud emotionally and mentally. He took away a lot of things I loved. Etc. I was so far in denial that I dug up the whole "unhealthy communications" chart and was convinced *I* was the abuser. If I, being a person with a great education, who has taken psychology classes in high school and college, who knows about abusive relationships, who has been in previous abusive relationships and known about that, etc, can get trapped so far in denial that it takes me a full month after calling off the relationship to realize that I was abused, how can anyone expect Anna, who has been given few, if any, real opportunities to experience a healthy relationship, to know she's in a situation she needs to distance herself from?

No question.  I have been in an emotionally and occasionally physically abusive marriage, and I questioned my own ability to make it on my own.  I cannot imagine what it is like for Anna, and I do not fault her.  I was just making the point that with a little money and some sound advice she has the ability to dig herself out.  It would take a lot of work and a lot of courage, and maybe she has not worked up to that.  Maybe she won't work up to that.  But I wouldn't writer her off.  

[Bad Wolf]

Where will they live? I thought adultery was grounds for divorce in thir cult, or is that only if the woman strays? Anna said something about turning a mess into a disaster, but she didn't explain those terms.

If Mr. Wolf cheated on me, he would find a very cold bed.

[TuringMachine]

As much as I'd want her to leave, everything I've seen of Anna tells me she's just gonna dive deeper into her faith. I could see Josh leaving though.  The only thing I've seen him enjoy about their faith is the ability to act better than everyone else.