All THINGS DILLARD - Part 3

[sockinshoe]

Why do people freak the f*ck out about anyone with children wanting to raise them anywhere that's not a suburb with a picket fence? People would put children in literal bubbles if they could, I swear.

I was a child who moved around a lot (not city-hopping, continent-hopping) for my parents' work. I lived in Latin America for a chunk of my life (toddler-early childhood years), and while I agree that the picket fence, helicopter parent life is not the only life, I do have to say that I am a little concerned for Jill/future baby Dillies.

Living in the developing world can be difficult. You have to be really vigilant about your health, injections, medications. And even then something can happen anyway. As a child, I was totally up-to-date with all injections (tetanus etc.) and all other medication. I got tuberculosis anyway. If my parents hadn't been monitoring my cough very carefully, they might not have caught it until a later stage.

My brother was born in Latin America. Initially, my mother had wanted a VBAC (like Jill might), but it was deemed too risky, so she had another C-Section. The hospital and quality of care was excellent, but that's because my parents had excellent insurance through their employer. Missionaries living on love offerings might not have the same options. My brother also got very sick with a respiratory condition in his first six months. He nearly asphyxiated on several occasions. In North America, he'd have gone on a respirator. In Latin America, the concern was that if he went into hospital, he'd catch something else and his weak little immune system would be unable to fight it. My parents had to carry him around and watch him closely for months.

These are not unusual things in Latin America. It is a beautiful, fertile place, but it's fertility also breeds viruses and bacteria like crazy. If the Dillards want to become baby-factories, then they need to make some careful choices regarding access to health care and insurance. Also, if Jill has 4 or 5 toddlers, it becomes harder for her or Derick to monitor sick children and keep on top of all the injections, check ups, etc. I'm not saying that life in Central/Latin America is necessarily dangerous, I'm saying that it requires some thought and that it's easier for families with good health insurance, regular income, and who make empowered and thought out decisions regarding reproductive health and fertility (especially if the mother is high-risk or has had complications before).

ETA: Riffles ahoy!

[somanybooks]

I was a child who moved around a lot (not city-hopping, continent-hopping) for my parents' work. I lived in Latin America for a chunk of my life (toddler-early childhood years), and while I agree that the picket fence, helicopter parent life is not the only life, I do have to say that I am a little concerned for Jill/future baby Dillies.

Living in the developing world can be difficult. You have to be really vigilant about your health, injections, medications. And even then something can happen anyway. As a child, I was totally up-to-date with all injections (tetanus etc.) and all other medication. I got tuberculosis anyway. If my parents hadn't been monitoring my cough very carefully, they might not have caught it until a later stage.

My brother was born in Latin America. Initially, my mother had wanted a VBAC (like Jill might), but it was deemed too risky, so she had another C-Section. The hospital and quality of care was excellent, but that's because my parents had excellent insurance through their employer. Missionaries living on love offerings might not have the same options. My brother also got very sick with a respiratory condition in his first six months. He nearly asphyxiated on several occasions. In North America, he'd have gone on a respirator. In Latin America, the concern was that if he went into hospital, he'd catch something else and his weak little immune system would be unable to fight it. My parents had to carry him around and watch him closely for months.

These are not unusual things in Latin America. It is a beautiful, fertile place, but it's fertility also breeds viruses and bacteria like crazy. If the Dillards want to become baby-factories, then they need to make some careful choices regarding access to health care and insurance. Also, if Jill has 4 or 5 toddlers, it becomes harder for her or Derick to monitor sick children and keep on top of all the injections, check ups, etc. I'm not saying that life in Central/Latin America is necessarily dangerous, I'm saying that it requires some thought and that it's easier for families with good health insurance, regular income, and who make empowered and thought out decisions regarding reproductive health and fertility (especially if the mother is high-risk or has had complications before).

ETA: Riffles ahoy!

It's interesting to hear from someone who has lived there as part of a family with small children. Thanks for posting. At just 3 months, I think Izzy is too young to get many vaccines. Do we know if he has gotten the basic baby vax that usually begin around 2 months? Glad you came thru the TB ok. TB was the first thing I thought of with regards to Izzy and his young age.

[halcionne]

I Totally agree with you! I also think they are going somewhere in Central America. Does anyone know how many times the Duggars have been there? I know at least 2 or 3 times that

some have gone. I wish Jill and Derrick the best!

They go every December (for the last I don't know how many years, but several) and sometimes more often.

[halcionne]

So, Duggar Air flew to Nashville yesterday, and it turns out the Dillards had a speaking engagement there. https://instagram.com/p/4eUdw9rswW/?tak ... llmdillard #eatingdisorders :?

Following the @ in her post eventually got me here: findingbalance.com/hfh/

Jill and Derick were featured at the Saturday evening gala for an awkwardly named Hungry for Hope event. I watched the video and still don't understand what they're about, but there seem to be a lot of mental health professionals featured in the lineup.

[ClaraOswin]

Clara, you seem so worked up about this. It's not healthy for you to get this stressed out about people just on speculating on a Duggar possibly being pregnant. Please, just try to relax. I mean this in the most sincere way. You are misconstruing the speculation and your own thoughts are making you feel like it's an attack on you and you're being insecure.

I guess tone is hard to read in text. I am not even remotely stressed out...haha! I was just explaining why some of us were sort of defending Jill. (Which is apparently a no-no here.) There are so many more worthy topics of conversation right now with their move and everything. To keep speculating on her gut at this point just seems pointless. For one, she'll be pregnant again eventually so who cares if it's now or 2 months from now?

[ClaraOswin]

I think the fact that ClaraOswin has repeatedly had to point out the fact that you can't tell if a woman is pregnant from a few pictures of her post partum says nothing about her mental stability, but more about the disgusting mindset of people on the board who reinforce the pressure on new moms to 'get back into shape' when they have a tiny human to worry about.

Pretty much. I felt a bit like a broken record but I really did feel like it needed to be repeated. There just seem to be a lot of people on this forum that are kind of clueless about all things pregnancy/birth/etc. I mean, we were all like that at some point, I'm sure. And obviously none of us are experts who know EVERYTHING. I remember years ago when I had no idea a woman's stomach didn't go back to 'normal' right after having a baby. It wasn't until I was told. So since people kept saying she looked pregnant over and over...I felt like repeating it over and over.

Again, it's highly likely she will be pregnant again in the near future. But I was just speaking for all women. There's too much pressure on women after they give birth.

[Johanna25]

For G*d's sake. This is a snark site. People are free to criticize, speculate, or fantasize at will. For others to apply it to themselves and take it personally is out-of-bounds. I sometimes dislike all the fakey "concern" people sometimes need to express, but have at it if that's your thing. Just don't start a war because you dislike the snark; it comes with the territory.

[Four is Enough]

I just spent some time on their website. Quite the slog-fest. The baby's cute, though!

[2manyKidzzz]

I wonder if Jill thinks that her devotion to the Baby Jesus will just protect her and her son's health. She might make it through the next delivery okay, but what about the 17 after that? I agree with the concerns about Israel's lack of vaccines and such and her potential delivery issues. People live every day in devloping countries, but to put yourself in the position of exposing an infant to any unnecessary health issues is not something I would do. But I am overprotective, I will readily admit.

I like Jill and Derick and wish them well. I do think it is obnoxious they are begging for money to do this. Just my opinion. It would make a good show for TLC I have to admit. I just hope it isn't Nepal in their present state of post earthquake recovery.

[NotALoserLikeYou]

So, Duggar Air flew to Nashville yesterday, and it turns out the Dillards had a speaking engagement there. https://instagram.com/p/4eUdw9rswW/?tak ... llmdillard #eatingdisorders :?

Following the @ in her post eventually got me here: findingbalance.com/hfh/

Jill and Derick were featured at the Saturday evening gala for an awkwardly named Hungry for Hope event. I watched the video and still don't understand what they're about, but there seem to be a lot of mental health professionals featured in the lineup.

It's apparently a Christian recovery program for girls who have had eating disorders. There were workshops and then Derick and Jill spoke at the "Freedom Stories Gala" on Sat. night.

Here is Jill, last night with a fan, looking nice in a dress:

[Snarkylark]

So, Duggar Air flew to Nashville yesterday, and it turns out the Dillards had a speaking engagement there. https://instagram.com/p/4eUdw9rswW/?tak ... llmdillard #eatingdisorders :?

Following the @ in her post eventually got me here: findingbalance.com/hfh/

Jill and Derick were featured at the Saturday evening gala for an awkwardly named Hungry for Hope event. I watched the video and still don't understand what they're about, but there seem to be a lot of mental health professionals featured in the lineup.

It's nice to see J'Izzy able to get his hands up by his face:)

[Boogalou]

For G*d's sake. This is a snark site. People are free to criticize, speculate, or fantasize at will. For others to apply it to themselves and take it personally is out-of-bounds. I sometimes dislike all the fakey "concern" people sometimes need to express, but have at it if that's your thing. Just don't start a war because you dislike the snark; it comes with the territory.

Usually snark is at least somewhat clever, interesting, funny, or insightful. Saying what essentially boils down to "lol, they're so fat" is not any of those things. It is boring to read once let alone thirty times in a row.

[NotALoserLikeYou]

Reading on, even though Jill may not have had an eating disorder (I assume), the whole focus is about inner beauty and not conforming or being influenced by the media or fashion world. I can see where Jill would be able to talk about that.

[FullmoonOverDuggardWaters]

Vaccines, smaccines! Israel will be fine. After all, what more do they need, than the watchful eye of the Lord?

I can see it already... The Dillards' in "Outbreak 2: A Mission to SPREAD" ! (Do you have a better tittle? Fill in/add your ideas; thought the premise might be entertaining.)

[halcionne]

It's apparently a Christian recovery program for girls who have had eating disorders. There were workshops and then Derick and Jill spoke at the "Freedom Stories Gala" on Sat. night.

Here is Jill, last night with a fan, looking nice in a dress:

Whoops, I didn't get my thoughts down the way I intended--happens all the time. :lol: It's pretty clear that the bolded is what they're about, and I'm glad they have experts participating, if they really are experts (I didn't look into it any further). But to name an event Hungry for Hope when it has to do with eating disorders or disordered eating is pretty tactless, imo. We all know Jill doesn't have enough sense to use sensitive hashtags, but it seems that this group is lacking in the same department. It reminds me of SOS and the Hope for the Hopeless t-shirts they wear in El Salvador. :roll:

[Mama Mia]

For G*d's sake. This is a snark site. People are free to criticize, speculate, or fantasize at will. For others to apply it to themselves and take it personally is out-of-bounds. I sometimes dislike all the fakey "concern" people sometimes need to express, but have at it if that's your thing. Just don't start a war because you dislike the snark; it comes with the territory.

It is a snark site. But it's a snark site that is clearly aimed at snarking on fundamentalists beliefs -- particularly as those beliefs harm and limit women and girls. You might have noticed some of these words bandied about : patriarchy, misogyny, rigid sex roles. Obviously members will have varying opinions about what those terms mean, and if a particular practice fits into those definitions, and how harmful ( or not) a particular statement or practice is.

It isn't a site full of robots with just one rigid opinion on every single issue. So , for example, the vast majority of posters here are staunchly pro- choice, a few ( like myself) favor a few abortion restrictions --- but no one is going to advocate for the abolition of all birth control.

Or , another example, most posters here are very strongly anti- spanking. A few think an occasional smack on the butt can be appropriate. But no one is going to argue in favor of Pearl style child abuse.

Leeringly speculating on the size of a post partum woman's belly to determine if she's pregnant again is incredibly misogynistic . It's not even something that the fundamentalists would think to do ( unless they are gossipy privately). So it can't even be put on a sliding scale of differing thought like the other issues. It's harmful. Period. It's body shaming. Period. It puts a ridiculous pressure on new mother's to focus on their appearance above all else.

So yea, there's snark, But this isn't it. Truthfully, it's kind of like coming on a site that makes fun of and discusses racist stereotypes and posting a blatantly racist joke. And saying " well it's a snark site! "

No.

[formergothardite]

They go every December (for the last I don't know how many years, but several) and sometimes more often.

Gothard does a lot of his work in Central America now. I wouldn't be surprised to find out they are working with IBLP/ATI in some capacity.

[halcionne]

Gothard does a lot of his work in Central America now. I wouldn't be surprised to find out they are working with IBLP/ATI in some capacity.

Hmm. iblp.org/programs/global-encounters shows long term activities in Taiwan (dates line up with the Dillards' July departure, fwiw) and short term missions in Taiwan and Mexico. I suppose they could stay longer in Mexico as staff, if we're sticking with the Central America rumor.

[OkToBeTakei]

For G*d's sake. This is a snark site. People are free to criticize, speculate, or fantasize at will. For others to apply it to themselves and take it personally is out-of-bounds. I sometimes dislike all the fakey "concern" people sometimes need to express, but have at it if that's your thing. Just don't start a war because you dislike the snark; it comes with the territory.

Getting snark wrong since mid May 2015 :lol:

[twinmama]

I wonder if Jill thinks that her devotion to the Baby Jesus will just protect her and her son's health. She might make it through the next delivery okay, but what about the 17 after that? I agree with the concerns about Israel's lack of vaccines and such and her potential delivery issues. People live every day in devloping countries, but to put yourself in the position of exposing an infant to any unnecessary health issues is not something I would do. But I am overprotective, I will readily admit.

I like Jill and Derick and wish them well. I do think it is obnoxious they are begging for money to do this. Just my opinion. It would make a good show for TLC I have to admit. I just hope it isn't Nepal in their present state of post earthquake recovery.

It's funny, I was going to say they could just wait til Izzy has had most of his shots and go then, just to be safe. I mean why expose your kid to something as easily preventable and serious as diptheria when you can just wait a bit and vax them, then go. But by the time Izzy has his shots, #2 will be a newborn. Then #3 will be a newborn, and so on. Really unless they go for a short term trip, they will never get to go with all vaxed kids unless they space the kids out a bunch.

[lostfemme]

I was a child who moved around a lot (not city-hopping, continent-hopping) for my parents' work. I lived in Latin America for a chunk of my life (toddler-early childhood years), and while I agree that the picket fence, helicopter parent life is not the only life, I do have to say that I am a little concerned for Jill/future baby Dillies.

Living in the developing world can be difficult. You have to be really vigilant about your health, injections, medications. And even then something can happen anyway. As a child, I was totally up-to-date with all injections (tetanus etc.) and all other medication. I got tuberculosis anyway. If my parents hadn't been monitoring my cough very carefully, they might not have caught it until a later stage.

My brother was born in Latin America. Initially, my mother had wanted a VBAC (like Jill might), but it was deemed too risky, so she had another C-Section. The hospital and quality of care was excellent, but that's because my parents had excellent insurance through their employer. Missionaries living on love offerings might not have the same options. My brother also got very sick with a respiratory condition in his first six months. He nearly asphyxiated on several occasions. In North America, he'd have gone on a respirator. In Latin America, the concern was that if he went into hospital, he'd catch something else and his weak little immune system would be unable to fight it. My parents had to carry him around and watch him closely for months.

These are not unusual things in Latin America. It is a beautiful, fertile place, but it's fertility also breeds viruses and bacteria like crazy. If the Dillards want to become baby-factories, then they need to make some careful choices regarding access to health care and insurance. Also, if Jill has 4 or 5 toddlers, it becomes harder for her or Derick to monitor sick children and keep on top of all the injections, check ups, etc. I'm not saying that life in Central/Latin America is necessarily dangerous, I'm saying that it requires some thought and that it's easier for families with good health insurance, regular income, and who make empowered and thought out decisions regarding reproductive health and fertility (especially if the mother is high-risk or has had complications before).

ETA: Riffles ahoy!

Thank-you so much for stating this so eloquently and providing your perspective! Yes, I think Jill and Derick are imbeciles who lack the proper discipline to maintain a safe life for themselves and their child(ren) in a foreign country.

If they move to El Salvador, as some are suggesting, I think they will only actually live there part time and spend most of the year on the fundie conference circuit raking in fees (and donations for their "work", naturally.) If a show gets built around their lives, the illness of every child will be "Dangerous!" and "Dramatic!", so sickness gets turned into cash for them. This is how Jill was raised, this is what she knows, I can't imagine she and Derick will challenge that paradigm.

Far from what is stated several pages ago, I don't really care about baby Dill, but I expect his parents to which means going above and beyond their Gothard bullshit and need for national attention and depending on the money of others to prove god's hand in their lives.

[MichellesCrunchyHair]

It's funny, I was going to say they could just wait til Izzy has had most of his shots and go then, just to be safe. I mean why expose your kid to something as easily preventable and serious as diptheria when you can just wait a bit and vax them, then go. But by the time Izzy has his shots, #2 will be a newborn. Then #3 will be a newborn, and so on. Really unless they go for a short term trip, they will never get to go with all vaxed kids unless they space the kids out a bunch.

Do we even know for certain that the Duggars vaccinate their kids or that the Dillards are? I see from a previous thread here (viewtopic.php?f=87&t=740) that no one seems to know for sure, and looking to sources outside FJ, all I found were more rumors and speculation. If indeed they don't vaccinate, then voila! Bringing a baby abroad shouldn't be an issue from their perspective.

[ClaraOswin]

Do we even know for certain that the Duggars vaccinate their kids or that the Dillards are? I see from a previous thread here (viewtopic.php?f=87&t=740) that no one seems to know for sure, and looking to sources outside FJ, all I found were more rumors and speculation. If indeed they don't vaccinate, then voila! Bringing a baby abroad shouldn't be an issue from their perspective.

I was thinking the same thing. I'm not sure we know if they fully vaccinate or selectively vaccinate or what. But I would think (hope) they would be smart enough to see which vaccines could benefit them/their child when leaving the country.

On the subject of the speaking engagement they had last night....

I seriously can't believe someone thought it would be a good idea to name the event "Hungry for Hope" if it deals with eating disorders!

[Rescinded and Mended]

I think the Duggars may selectively vaccinate. All the kids had chicken pox awhile back (this was the episode where Jim Bob proudly proclaimed that, because of this, the kids would never have Shingles :roll: ), but I heard Josie supposedly got vaccinated before they took her overseas.

[Handmaiden of Dog]

On the subject of the speaking engagement they had last night....

I seriously can't believe someone thought it would be a good idea to name the event "Hungry for Hope" if it deals with eating disorders!

My guess is that it refers to being "hungry" for the word of God, that is to say (in their fundie world) having an eating disorder means you don't have enough Jesus in your life. By feeding on God's word you miraculously heal yourself!