Duggars are "praying" about adoption (MERGED)

[gustava]

That link is requirements to become foster parents in Arkansas. There's a family size limit of 8 children in the home, but I don't know if that applies to foster-adopt on just straight fostercare. I DO know the bedroom sizes AND the sleeping arrangements will apply for foster-adoption and thus why the Duggars would NEVER be approved for a foster-adopt situation.

However, Arkansas private adoptions have far less requirements to them. However, they WILL still require similiar sleeping arrangements, at the very least children having their own beds and not be sharing bedrooms with adult siblings.

Actually, the link includes both foster care and adoption, which is why I directed folks to p. 37+.

[snarkyjan]

God, if you do exist, here is your chance to prove it:

Stop the Duggars from either adopting or having another child of their own. Their existing children have suffered enougn.

[laura oz]

This smells like a desperate bid for publicity. I just can't see them getting approved for adoption. Too many kids and not enough bedrooms or beds. Or attention from their actual parents.

[halfheartedheroine]

I know in the state of Illinois, it's at least 40 square feet of bedroom per person, specifically not counting the square footage of the entire house... so there's a limit to the amount of Costco shelving/bedding that could go up (small mercy, at least!)

[So Says I]

God, if you do exist, here is your chance to prove it:

Stop the Duggars from either adopting or having another child of their own. Their existing children have suffered enougn.

I know, right? God laid it on my heart to send Michelle one of those baby dolls that looks realistic and pretends to breastfeed. She'll always have a baby under 6 months old and she'll never get bored. None of that tedious growing up bullshit. Wouldn't that be splendid for all? No miscarriages or children being adopted who could actually be sent to loving, attentive parents.

[Tator Tot Tubby]

I think we've discussed similar things before but if the Duggars were to adopt a child from a foreign country, would they give them an American name or let them keep their original name? I'm not sure if they'd care about the "J" theme as this kid would really be an accessory to the family and having an exotic name may help them get more attention. Of course they'd bastardize the spelling and pronunciation of the name....

[Athena]

This probably goes without saying here, and may even have been already said but - they need more kids like a hole in the head. Though Michelle does seem like she's already had a lobotomy.

[PennySycamore]

I know, right? God laid it on my heart to send Michelle one of those baby dolls that looks realistic and pretends to breastfeed. She'll always have a baby under 6 months old and she'll never get bored. None of that tedious growing up bullshit. Wouldn't that be splendid for all? No miscarriages or children being adopted who could actually be sent to loving, attentive parents.

They had a woman on a Wife Swap rerun that had 14 of those dolls! IIRC, the dolls cost about $1500 each, but that's what Mullet should do rather than trying for another baby or adopting a baby -that is, if she can't decide that being a Grandma is a great thing and start grandmothering the M'kids to the hilt

[MorbidAwe]

They had a woman on a Wife Swap rerun that had 14 of those dolls! IIRC, the dolls cost about $1500 each, but that's what Mullet should do rather than trying for another baby or adopting a baby -that is, if she can't decide that being a Grandma is a great thing and start grandmothering the M'kids to the hilt

TLC can pay for the dolls! I think she's also addicted to being pregnant and giving birth (and all the attention that goes with it), so it might not work!

[ILoveJellybeans]

TLC can buy her a reborn doll and one of those fake bumps, so she can be pregnant and have a baby forever.

[snarkyjan]

TLC can pay for the dolls! I think she's also addicted to being pregnant and giving birth (and all the attention that goes with it), so it might not work!

If their adoption bid fails, not only will Boob have to buy Michelle several of those "Reborn" dolls, but every maternity ward in Tontitown, Springdale and Fayetteville would be well advised to go on high alert.

[freejugar]

nogreaterjoymom.com has commented on this, check it out

basically she says that she sees nothing wrong with this

[chaotic life]

Yeah she's a lot more insulting than it's fine. Says you would only disagree if you have never stepped foot in a "third world orphanage" and don't understand that family means everything to children.

[Cheetah]

Man, it scares me to think of an older girl getting adopted into a fundie family. "Hi, we're your new family! No tv, school, opposite sex friends, and we'll send you off to boot camp if we ever catch you dancing! And don't worry about unpacking your clothes, we've already burned them. See your new older sisters to be assigned a denim skirt and used flipflops. "

I think I've read a few blogs from fundie-lites who have adopted older girls from Ukraine that are not quite this bad, but nearly. And then they wonder why the kids have RAD symptoms...

[Mela99]

Does anybody know how heavily child preferences are weighted in Arkansas? I know to some extent (in a few states), adoption processes won't even start if the child isn't comfortable with the situation.

I guess, even if they managed to get past requirements, there is the hope that the kid would recognize the situation for what it is and refuse.

[Mama Mia]

They would probably get past the bedroom requirement by using the playroom as a bedroom for the new child, once the adoption was complete they could stick them in one of the dorms.

[Buzzard]

They would probably get past the bedroom requirement by using the playroom as a bedroom for the new child, once the adoption was complete they could stick them in one of the dorms.

Considering the amount of land they have I cant believe they havent started building "suites" off the back of the house. The J'kids are GOING to get married in the next few years. Courting males/females are going to come to visit (along with their families) and it would be prudent to have a place for them to stay. In the meantime, the older kids could atleast share the rooms (two to a room, of course) to free them from the dorm and prepare for the "season" of life that is to come. Grandchildren sleep in the dorm, tended by hannie, older kids and their spouses in the Duggar hotel built out back.

[Mama Mia]

Considering the amount of land they have I cant believe they havent started building "suites" off the back of the house. The J'kids are GOING to get married in the next few years. Courting males/females are going to come to visit (along with their families) and it would be prudent to have a place for them to stay. In the meantime, the older kids could atleast share the rooms (two to a room, of course) to free them from the dorm and prepare for the "season" of life that is to come. Grandchildren sleep in the dorm, tended by hannie, older kids and their spouses in the Duggar hotel built out back.

Yeah, I love looking at the way space is used in homes - and the Duggar house makes me crazy because they have so much room (granted, it's for a huge number of people ) - but they made such weird choices for how it is used. That ridiculously dangerous open staircase, having to walk through the laundry room to get to the guest suite, having the laundry room/ group closet downstairs when the bedrooms are all upstairs, not thinking through that with that many kids at least two bedrooms per gender would be useful :angry-banghead: ... argghhh

[patsymae]

I think there is a Duggar adoption in the works. My heart bleeds for that child.

[patsymae]

"I could definitely see some nice young Christian girl who got in trouble being "encouraged" to give her baby to the Duggars. Let's hope something stops them, even if it's as stupid as having to change the show's opening credits."

I could see that, too, but I think a Salvadoran adoption is already in the works--they want a kid that will make a statement. Let's not be naive about how easy it is for an American couple with money, especially a high-profile, "Christian" couple with money, to get a child when they want one, especially a child from a poor country--the obstacles other posters have mentioned apply only to ethical people. They will spin it not just as having their eyes opened to "the adoption world," but will now see the "death" of Jubilee as, after much prayer, realizing that god opened that space in their hearts and in their family for the other child that god was saving for them (TLC won't allow the mention of them "saving" the child.) Some of the older girls have studied Spanish enough to order tacos in a Mexican restaurant, and JBoob knows enough to yell "GRACIAS" when in Beijing, so culture shock won't be a problem for this child. Even the Duggar parents from hell know that special blessing Josie, although 3, probably isn't capable of watching the new blessing, but the lost girls don't have much to do during the day so I can see them "loving" changing diapers and feedings, if they acquire an infant/toddler. If it's an older child, we'll suddenly see more episodes of them with their "friend" child collectors and some poor kid having a lot of fun playing four-square with a bunch of other confused children arranged to be photographed like a mini UN.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

OH GOD, I JUST HAD A TERRIBLE THOUGHT! What if she adopts one of those kids from the really crappy orphanages who are like 15 year old newborns as theyve been lying in a crib all day and not interacted with. They could be like Josie was, the special little miracle....but forever. :shock:

Speaking o' which, nogreaterjoymom has weighed in: www.nogreaterjoymom.com/2013/04/father-knows-best.html

Just... wut?

They won't adopt. Jim Bob is too proud of his large biological family and Michelle likes being able to say she delivered every one of them.

If it's about the "record" (the record which they probably won't in a million years ADMIT to caring about) then they know what counts is live biological kids. Jubilee and Caleb don't get them to the magic 20, and neither would an adopted kid. On the "child collectors extraordinaire" thread people have linked to blogs of absolutely huge families by adoption - such families might come under some (legitimate) criticism over their size but they're not unusual in the way 20 biokids all birthed by the same mother is.

Maybe they'll adopt embryo's ? Is this a thing?

Oh yes, it's a thing. Google "snowflake babies."

Came in here looking for any comments about nogreaterjoymom's post on this though...

Yeah she's a lot more insulting than it's fine. Says you would only disagree if you have never stepped foot in a "third world orphanage" and don't understand that family means everything to children.

...and happy to see yours. Yeah, what is she thinking??? Oh, "Father Knows Best." Of course. She is STILL 100% full of the "gotta save 'em all!" mentality.

[tuckerphez]

About nogreaterjoy mom... thankfully a bunch of commenters are pointing out the issues with the Duggars adopting a child, especially a nonwhite child from a foreign orphanage.

[Chibi Author]

Speaking o' which, nogreaterjoymom has weighed in: http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/2013/04/ ... -best.html

Just... wut?

If she wasn't talking about the Duggars, I'd actually agree with some of what she said.

But I'm sorry, a family of 18 kids (Josh doesn't really count in this case) has no business adopting a child who would most likely need quite a bit of attention to get acclimated to the new environment; because really, Michelle and Jim Bob already has so many kids who genuinely need them.

If they waited a decade or so, I could understand that, but Josie's only three. Talking about adoption seems a little soon, quite frankly.

[Salamander]

Speaking o' which, nogreaterjoymom has weighed in: http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/2013/04/ ... -best.html

Just... wut?

Her post is full of strawcritics.

Those unsolicited opinions hurt families who are following God with reckless abandon to the child born in their hearts...no matter where the journey takes them, or who they find when they reach their destination.

Hate to break it to her, but however much we may want to keep the Duggars from adopting, they have enough money and enough sway in their community to be able to adopt a child if they choose to. Our comments may hurt, but if they were half as humble as they claim to be, they'd take a look at what the haterz are saying and consider if it has merit.

I would put my money on the fact that ninety-nine percent of the naysayers and the ones slamming a good, honest, hard-working, larger-than-normal American family that is open to expanding their family through the blessing of adoption have never, ever set foot in a foreign orphanage.

The Duggars are neither good nor honest and a good amount of them are not hard-working. Also, Othering much? Bet she thinks U.S. orphanages and group homes are a picnic.

It matters not a single morsel how many kids a family has. What matters is that their hearts are wide open to rescuing another orphan who will surely either die or go on to live a life of absolute hopelessness should they not be adopted. Family changes everything in a child's life. Family gives them hope and a future. Family is redemption for children who live in conditions our human hearts cannot begin to comprehend.

Because all orphans are absolutely hopeless without the Duggars to save them! I don't want to understate how difficult it must be to grow up in an orphanage, but goddamn give the kids some credit.

And maybe, just maybe, you will see that every child deserves the love of a family, the security of a home, the medical attention they desperately need, the hugs they crave and the nourishment of good food.

Every child deserves this. Any child raised by Jim Bob and Michelle gets a mockery of this.

Nogreaterjoymom doesn't seem to understand that most people agree, parents of larger-than-average families can provide good homes for adopted children. But the Duggars won't. They can't be arsed to raise the children they have.

Edited to fix spacing.

[Charliemae]

I'm aware of Fundie unwed mothers homes. I just really don't think it would be as easy for them to get a birthmother to choose them as people here are claiming. I don't think it's impossible, but I know a LOT about birthmothers from perssonal experience and I think it would be VERY hard, even in those circles, to get a teen to allow them to adopt her child. I think it would take extensive coercision that would become obvious and likely would end up with extremely BAD publicity by the time it was said and done. Since I can clearly see the Gothard hedging in Michelle's declaration, and since I know they did this before when Anna was pregnant with Michael, I just don't believe the Duggars would put forth the serious effort it would take to do a domestic infant adoption. It would require extensive and deliberate effort and they would only be interested in a situatio where they could say the child was just dropped off with them and this PROVED this was really GOD telling them to do it.

Gothardites have been saying for two decades that of course they are not opposed to adoption and considering it. However, almost all Gothardites who say that clarify that they would have go be absolutely certain that was what God was saying, and when you actually ask them to explain how they would be certain, they will explain that God would have to bring the child to them by some divine intervention that did not require their seeking it out. Since I know that is the definition behind the VERY language Michelle is using now for other Gothardites, I believe that is the definition that is really behind her statement. She's VERY good at spinning her beliefs to look sane and mainstream when they are crazy Gothard behind closed doors. I don't see this as any different, and I think it would require deliberate effort for them to adopt. I don't believe they would ever actually puth forth deliberate effort to adopt.

This rings so strongly of the truth to me, it deserves to be quoted. Those who are saying that the Duggars have an adoption in process, where are you getting that information? I'm firmly on the side of this being a huge publicity stunt. They just want to keep the words "and counting" in the show title.