SAHD Writes Anti-Abortion Short Story

[JMarie]

Bravo to Elizabeth who wrote the last comment. Is she one of us?

[Burris]

Haley has pulled the story.

stopandsmelltheroseshere.blogspot.com/2013/02/another-choice.html

I don't have a lot of sympathy for her. She's 17--the Internet has been a known commodity all her life. If Haley wanted to just share it with her friends, as Cheryl claimed, she could have:

1. Set her blog privacy settings so that only friends could read it.

2. E-mailed it to her friends.

3. Imitated the Jane Austen heroines that fundie girls idolized and sent it by snail mail.

But she didn't do any of those things--and will continue not to do any of those things--because Cheryl (and by extension the rest of her family) want to use their blogs to witness to the unwashed heathens of the internets. Too bad most of us see through that.

Also noting that Cheryl claims that Haley was urged by her sisters to rush the story to the internet before she could tell her the story needed work, but Haley goes with a more general "my family suggested it." I still want to know what kind of family event requires a teenager to hastily written anti-choice screed and read it out loud without delay.

And now, to console us, Gizoogle translations of some passages:

Oh, dat wuz some funky-ass shit right der, biatch! Ah laughed mah fuckin' ass off. And den ah done cried, it was so bad.

[GeoBQn]

It's nice that she's gonna get her daughter to do research (though she still has a snowball's chance in hell of getting to do objective, independent research), but there's still the problem that she, a grown woman, thinks you can get a nursing degree AND PERFORM ABORTIONS ALL DAY and not know about fetal development. People don't provide abortions with their eyes shut ffs.

She claims that Haley will talk to a nurse who used to perform abortions until she saw a perfectly formed hand in the tissue and she ran screaming from the room.

[salex]

Not touching on the topic, this morning I recommended that she take some writing workshops or attend writer's conferences and study the craft. I believe that was among the deleted posts, which I think is odd. It was not judgemental, just a statement of how writers develop their writing.

[BlondeAgent007]

from the post before:

School has been another big thing for me. I'm planning on graduating in May/June and I'm going to take the SAT test in May. That has me busy with tying all of my 'loose ends' up. :)

EGADS! that's a paper worthy to publish and she's gonna be done in 3 months!! DEAR LORD! This girl needs a crash course in writing and research pronto! I wonder how that full length novel she is almost done with sounds....

[merrily]

from the post before:

EGADS! that's a paper worthy to publish and she's gonna be done in 3 months!! DEAR LORD! This girl needs a crash course in writing and research pronto! I wonder how that full length novel she is almost done with sounds....

I don't understand why she needs to take the SATs. It's not a requirement to graduate is it? I mean, SATs are only for colleges/unis. Is she planning to go to colleges?

[slickcat79]

I don't understand why she needs to take the SATs. It's not a requirement to graduate is it? I mean, SATs are only for colleges/unis. Is she planning to go to colleges?

Maybe she thinks she is, or might want to. But the SAT includes a writing portion now...she may be in for a rude awakening. CollegeBoard won't give you an 800 on that for regurgitating the "right" worldview.

[formergothardite]

I was sheltered, really sheltered, but from reading and just knowing people I knew that nurses would have to study fetal development and wouldn't be ignorant about all things pregnancy. These things shouldn't have needed researching, they should have been basic knowledge.

[Closed Womb]

So it was a quick writing assignment meant to be done as a speech? If it was this bad to read, I can't imagine sitting through someone reading it. At 17, this is the type of material that I would have used in a speech team event called "wretched interp"--a goofy event done at festivals where we perform the type of material that would get straight last-places any other time. (For the record, I got 1st place in that event doing a verse reading of Vanilla Ice and Abba songs.)

Cheryl went from insisting that she gave it a "good grade," to claiming that she "saw the story needed work" and acting as if Haley "rushed" to post the story against her wishes or advice.

[formergothardite]

So she is upset that people told her that it didn't reflect well on homeschoolers? Well, it doesn't.

[Guest Anonymous]

I've been looking at 'Another Choice'. This was in the comments section:

I want to tell you how very proud of you I am. When you were upset over all of this last night, you didn't lash out. You didn't respond in anger. Instead, you went to the woods to get alone with the Lord. Every situation that drives us to Jesus is a good thing! (Romans 8:28). Wise girl! ~Love, Mom

Why do people do this? You live in the same house as someone, and you see them all the time, so why communicate through blog comments?

Well, at least Haley has learnt an important lesson from all this: Anyone who criticises your work is either a hater or a troll!

wzSKGYUr3Z4

(This 'very timely' video was posted at the end of 'Another Choice')

[salex]

I've been looking at 'Another Choice'. This was in the comments section:

Why do people do this? You live in the same house as someone, and you see them all the time, so why communicate through blog comments?

Because she is lecturing others for making her daughter get upset

I

[merrily]

The sad thing is she thinks the criticism from free jinger are OMG TROLLS comments. Haley, dear, trolls would use, in your own words 'more intimidating' words. I would feel bad for her if her story was any way remotely good and people were trolling for the LOLs but in this case I don't have any sympathy for her founce.

[OkToBeTakei]

Why do people do this? You live in the same house as someone, and you see them all the time, so why communicate through blog comments?

Because she is lecturing others for making her daughter get upset

I'll translate that. Never mind love, your essay was shite but at least God still loves you :P

[BlondeAgent007]

Oh, Jesus, Friend and Savior

Great and Mighty is Your name

You are the ultimate love giver

You are always here for me

I’ve no cause to doubt at all

I’m safe in Your arms for eternity

I know I'm really immature, but this made me dissolve in giggles. She just needs to stick a "sweet fellowship" in there.

Maybe I iz a haterz.

[GolightlyGrrl]

The sad thing is she thinks the criticism from free jinger are OMG TROLLS comments. Haley, dear, trolls would use, in your own words 'more intimidating' words. I would feel bad for her if her story was any way remotely good and people were trolling for the LOLs but in this case I don't have any sympathy for her founce.

Mean old Jingerites. We're just taking away Haley's "sparkle" (TM Tierra from "The Bachelor")

[Closed Womb]

She posted this thinking it would be read only by her writing buddies; she really had no idea it would be posted in a forum where it would be torn apart.

Just got around to reading the comments from the original (now deleted) post. This one ^ is from omniscient Mommy.

"posted in a forum where it would be torn apart" = FreeJinger ?

If so, Hi Cheryl

For the love of all that is good and right with the world, if your daughter actually does revise this, she should do more research than just seeking out one woman who, allegedly, found a fully formed hand on her latex glove (you mentioned it twice.) That's not research. That's confirming your bias.

The problem with the story isn't that the protagonist ended up pro-life, it's that it was (1) really, really, painfully poorly written (2) lacked basic knowledge of a nurse's education and employee-employer expectations (ie, showing up on time) (3) was obvious propaganda, and, as such, would be wholly ineffective in swaying someone.

[merrily]

Maybe she can set up a teenink account and post her story there. She'll get criticism from her peers. Not from mean old hags on a feminazi site.

[Yo Nurse]

CoatRack, I love your sister's writing and I can't wait to see how she chooses to end this story.

I don't think there is a chance of this happening, but I would love to see Hayley go into nursing. We were taught in school to leave our own values and biases out of our patient care. This was very helpful to me, as I came from a very forced-birth, anti-contraceptive and devoutly Catholic family. It forced me to re-examine a lot of the values I was raised with and I will always be grateful for that.

[CoatRack]

I'm pretty sure my sister isn't putting more thought into that story. She hates writing, she just hates science more.

[leggajegga]

The reason I failed to respond to your comments is because you guys seriously are intimidating. But thank you all the same for the life lessons that you have unknowingly provided me with. :)

This passive-aggressive smiley face really gets me. I stopped pulling that crap in middle school.

[ceg045]

I want to tell you how very proud of you I am. When you were upset over all of this last night, you didn't lash out. You didn't respond in anger. Instead, you went to the woods to get alone with the Lord. Every situation that drives us to Jesus is a good thing! (Romans 8:28). Wise girl! ~Love, Mom

Is this fundie girl code for "sneaking out to see my boyfriend"? :lol:

[crazyforkate]

It's nice that she's gonna get her daughter to do research (though she still has a snowball's chance in hell of getting to do objective, independent research), but there's still the problem that she, a grown woman, thinks you can get a nursing degree AND PERFORM ABORTIONS ALL DAY and not know about fetal development. People don't provide abortions with their eyes shut ffs.

Not unless they're dared to, anyway.

Honestly, I think she handled that pretty well - no screaming or rants, but just a thanks message and an acknowledgment of the criticisms. I have bigger problems with the mother.

[valsa]

All criticism about the story aside, wouldn't a better writing assignment have been to write a story about a woman choosing to have an abortion?

When I was in school, I found the most thought-provoking assignments to be the ones where we had to write from the point of view of someone who believed differently than we did. The mark of a truly skilled writer (or debater) is someone who can argue convincingly or write sympathetically for a position they do not believe in themselves.

[crazyforkate]

All criticism about the story aside, wouldn't a better writing assignment have been to write a story about a woman choosing to have an abortion?

When I was in school, I found the most thought-provoking assignments to be the ones where we had to write from the point of view of someone who believed differently than we did. The mark of a truly skilled writer (or debater) is someone who can argue convincingly or write sympathetically for a position they do not believe in themselves.

But...but if she ever has to consider that the other side might have a point, they might lose her to the sinful world forever! Plus it's not like girls need to think anyway.