Bates 31: When Will They Go Away?

[nokidsmom]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

Remember when tiny Josie had a seizure and Jana had to manage that medical emergency with GM Mary sort of overseeing the whole circus from her neighboring home, all while JB and the Mullet were in MX likely gnashing on nachos and swilling Mexican Coke?

JB and J'chelle had no business leaving a fragile baby in care of siblings like that. 

Just as the one Duggar boy (forget which one) fell into a stage pit and out came the cameras instead of rushing to help him. 

Just as I believe that J'chelle owed it to all her children, including Joshley, to show up in court during his trial and fully face what her own neglect and repressive upbringing did to him. 

Other example too numerous to list but parents of the year, they are anything but.  

[nolongerIFBx]

On 3/13/2023 at 3:38 PM, nokidsmom said:

. . . .

Just as I believe that J'chelle owed it to all her children, including Joshley, to show up in court during his trial and fully face what her own neglect and repressive upbringing did to him. 

Other example too numerous to list but parents of the year, they are anything but.  

I don't think that neglect and repressive upbringing made him a pedophile. Fostering an environment that allowed him easy access to victims and putting the onerous for preventing abuse on the daughters which relieved him (if only in part) of the guilt of his actions, that was on his parents. Additionally, they should have gotten him into therapy to learn to control his impulses--at his first offense he was still young enough not to meet the medical term for pedophilia. Josh could have, though, sought treatment once he was married and recognized as an independent adult. He did not and that is on him even though he might have been more open to treatment had he not been neglected and brought up in a repressive environment.

 

[nokidsmom]

56 minutes ago, nolongerIFBx said:

I don't think that neglect and repressive upbringing made him a pedophile. Fostering an environment that allowed him easy access to victims and putting the onerous for preventing abuse on the daughters which relieved him (if only in part) of the guilt of his actions, that was on his parents. Additionally, they should have gotten him into therapy to learn to control his impulses--at his first offense he was still young enough not to meet the medical term for pedophilia. Josh could have, though, sought treatment once he was married and recognized as an independent adult. He did not and that is on him even though he might have been more open to treatment had he not been neglected and brought up in a repressive environment.

ITA .  IMHO that neglect and upbringing were behind the many parental "misses" here.  And they had more than one chance to deal with it.  While best case was that his parents got him help the very minute they knew what he did, once he repeated it that right there should have been a clue that their initial efforts, such as they were, were ineffective.  Not ideal but better than what JB/J'chelle ended up doing.  In any case, also getting help for his sisters, separating them from him, and certainly not forcing them to interact with him in the ways they had to.  If JB/J'chelle had intervened more effectively earlier, impressed on Joshley he was 100% responsible for his actions, he might not be sitting in Seagoville today.  

 

[Keys]

It just occurred to me that I think (and correct me if I’m wrong?) that none of the Bates grandchildren so far have been born by c-section. That’s pretty surprising when you think of how many there are already. I know several of them have had complicated pregnancies with health issues, but I’m glad their deliveries all seem to be straightforward at least (unlike the Duggars)

[JustEnough]

6 minutes ago, Keys said:

It just occurred to me that I think (and correct me if I’m wrong?) that none of the Bates grandchildren so far have been born by c-section. That’s pretty surprising when you think of how many there are already. I know several of them have had complicated pregnancies with health issues, but I’m glad their deliveries all seem to be straightforward at least (unlike the Duggars)

If this is true (and I think it is as well), it really is astounding. A third of births are by C-section in the US, so to have made it to what, 24? 25? grandkids without one is really amazing.

That being said Kelly had 19 without one right? That’s also quite unlikely to have played out that way. But 3rd gen have come from a bunch of different mothers, not all daughters of KJ, in different areas with different providers so I think I’m even more surprised by that consistency in avoiding a C-section.

[SassyPants]

49 minutes ago, JustEnough said:

If this is true (and I think it is as well), it really is astounding. A third of births are by C-section in the US, so to have made it to what, 24? 25? grandkids without one is really amazing.

That being said Kelly had 19 without one right? That’s also quite unlikely to have played out that way. But 3rd gen have come from a bunch of different mothers, not all daughters of KJ, in different areas with different providers so I think I’m even more surprised by that consistency in avoiding a C-section.

My parents have 7 grands aged 35-23 and ALL of them were born via C-section. Also 1 GGD born via c-section.

[Keys]

1 hour ago, JustEnough said:

If this is true (and I think it is as well), it really is astounding. A third of births are by C-section in the US, so to have made it to what, 24? 25? grandkids without one is really amazing.

That being said Kelly had 19 without one right? That’s also quite unlikely to have played out that way. But 3rd gen have come from a bunch of different mothers, not all daughters of KJ, in different areas with different providers so I think I’m even more surprised by that consistency in avoiding a C-section.

It’s so interesting! I’m sure there’s a genetic component at play too with the Bates girls with regards to pelvic anatomy etc, but there are so many reasons a c-section could be needed, so it’s really interesting

[CanadianMamam]

My mom is one of 8. There are 13 grandkids, 18 great-grandchildren and 3 great-great grandchildren so far. Only one (my youngest) was a c-section and I come from a family where complicated pregnancies are the norm but not deliveries, apparently. 

[SassyPants]

3 hours ago, CanadianMamam said:

My mom is one of 8. There are 13 grandkids, 18 great-grandchildren and 3 great-great grandchildren so far. Only one (my youngest) was a c-section and I come from a family where complicated pregnancies are the norm but not deliveries, apparently. 

We are a family of women ( my mom, myself and my daughter )who do not go into labor. My daughter is soon to be 36 and I swear I’d still be pregnant had I not been induced at 43 weeks. FORTY-THREE weeks. My youngest brother was a shriveled prune by the time he was born. My mom claims he was a month overdue. He was born in 1968, so maybe… My nephews had a variety of delivery complications from CPD, to distress, to breech presentations. In order to get my cervix to dilate I was basically on a mainline of Pitocin. I had contractions that never eased up and my baby’s heart rate couldn’t take it. With the second, at 42 weeks and no progress, I waved the white flag. Easy pregnancies, super easy recoveries, but man the deliveries…

[JermajestyDuggar]

I’m not anything close to a nurse so I’m ignorant of these things but I guess I always assumed there was a bit of genetics involved when it comes to needing a c section. I always figured my sister and I had vaginal births along with our mom and grandma because we had wide birthing hips 😂 That’s partly a joke. But we have some very wide hips in the family. I’m not exaggerating either. 

[SassyPants]

6 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’m not anything close to a nurse so I’m ignorant of these things but I guess I always assumed there was a bit of genetics involved when it comes to needing a c section. I always figured my sister and I had vaginal births along with our mom and grandma because we had wide birthing hips 😂 That’s partly a joke. But we have some very wide hips in the family. I’m not exaggerating either. 

I do wonder if I have an abnormally shaped inner pelvis as both of my babies had unfavorable presentations. The first was posterior and the second would have been a facial presentation. Both of these situations are unfavorable for dilation and make protracted labors and C/Ss more likely.

[Teaistheway]

8 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

I do wonder if I have an abnormally shaped inner pelvis as both of my babies had unfavorable presentations.

Same here. Both of mine were difficult, protracted births that required ventouse. Doctors always struggle to locate my cervix and a recent scan has revealed my uterus is tilted backwards and on its side, so assume that may have been the problem.

[JermajestyDuggar]

22 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

I do wonder if I have an abnormally shaped inner pelvis as both of my babies had unfavorable presentations. The first was posterior and the second would have been a facial presentation. Both of these situations are unfavorable for dilation and make protracted labors and C/Ss more likely.

Oh I forgot I was born sunny side up. My mom said it was worse than my sister who was face down like normal. 

[CanadianMamam]

My only c-section was when my water broke at 33 weeks with zero signs of labour and baby in distress. My water also broke at 37.5 weeks with no sign of labour but that time they gave me pictocin. 

[GuineaPigCourtship]

My csection was due to failure to progress during my induction.  This baby REALLY didn't want to be born as they confirmed head down on ultrasound before starting the induction and she backed herself up and went transverse.  I swear she was stretching her feet out and clinging onto the wall of my uterus to resist eviction.  At 2 years old, she is still very into being held and snuggled.  I'm the first csection in the family on both sides (my aunts/uncles and first cousins) and so far still the only one.

[Coconut Flan]

Carry on here: