Seriously Steve 3: Relaxing His Grip as He Prepares to Turn 70?

[HerNameIsBuffy]

16 hours ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

It is even possible that over time they will feel safe in your friendship and will let you see behind the smiles to the pain.

Anyone who deliberately sets out to make strangers feel safe with them sets off my alarm bells.  

We all want people we love and to whom we're close to feel safe with us, but the way this is phrased reads as predatory to me.

[fundiefan]

34 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Anyone who deliberately sets out to make strangers feel safe with them sets off my alarm bells.  

We all want people we love and to whom we're close to feel safe with us, but the way this is phrased reads as predatory to me.

This, 100%. Using my name constantly is a red flag to me - as he droned on about in part one - and trying to get "close" to me really throws up flags. To me, close relationships are organic, you don't have to try with that as your end goal. 

Everything about Steve is red flag territory. I have always been astonished that people flocked to his "sessions" in high enough numbers for them to make a living with the dog & pony show. And their self published books with ideas pilfered from real life. Chore packs is nothing original or brand new. Maybe not with the Maxwell control & restrictions, but having a way to track chores that the kid can do his/her self is not new or unique. 

People always have and always will amaze me with their ability to check their brains. 

The creep factor of Steve is strong, even through online data. I guarantee my skin would crawl if I were ever in his presence. 

[Hane]

@fundiefan, absolutely. His book “Making Great Conversationalists” has nothing to do with conversations and everything to do with conversions.

[ClareDeLune]

Is "fishing in the boat" from a bible story or something? Like walking on water. He talks in so many riddles but it must be something his readers understand?

[petrushka]

Let's not forget the Maxwells still have books to promote.  I imagine he's always looking to find new customers.  His "outreach" probably has as much to do with $$ as anything else.

[Bluebirdbluebell]

On 5/22/2021 at 4:23 AM, ClareDeLune said:

Is "fishing in the boat" from a bible story or something? Like walking on water. He talks in so many riddles but it must be something his readers understand?

He explained it (sort of) in the first article "Fishing in the Boat".

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Assume you have a friend who liked to fish, and you knew of a place where the fish would actually jump in the boat. No doubt, he would want to go fishing there because the easiest place of all to fish is “in the boat.”

 

[Bluebirdbluebell]

Free breakdown of today's (May 26, 20210) Seriously Dad?

Title: Avoiding Marriage Disappointment

Shouldn't that say Marital rather than Marriage since the word before Disappointment is an adjective?

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What if tomorrow you find a note your wife had hidden for you to discover and read while at work.

This is a question; it should have a question mark.  

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With a big smile, you begin reading it anticipating a surprise she has planned for you. To your disappointment, she shares something very serious. 

 I think most men would deal with work at work and not read notes at work.

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She explains how the marriage hasn’t met her expectations. She tells you that you are a nice guy and relatively good to her, but she has discovered she really doesn’t love you and is bored.

Well reading nothing but the bible all day could be boring. It might be boring that you're lecturing her for looking at websites you don't approve of, which he knows about thanks to their internet software.  It could also be boring there's no television in the house....

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She assures you that she won’t be seeking a divorce or another guy, as she believes that is sin. She would like to just be friends from here on out for the sake of the kids. She plans to take college classes, get a degree, and pursue the career she always wanted. 

Divorce isn't always a sin, Steve.

Also I'm surprised she's willing to stay married, given that she's so unhappy. 

Maybe I'm naïve, but I'm not sure how "staying friends while married" will work. 

Finally if she's wants to go to college and get a career, maybe the HUSBAND isn't what's boring her! Maybe she's bored being home all day! Once she gets that job, you should try staying home all day and see if you're happy.

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Feeling as if you just had the wind knocked out, you think about how you have provided for her and shared your life with her. As you reflect back, you agree that you aren’t real gushy and romantic. You also know you work a lot, but that was to give her a good life. 

I admit it would be devastating to hear you spouse is bored with you. I'm surprised Steve isn't just blaming the woman for being bored, but then there would be no point to the column. And Yes, the lesson there's more to life than work is a sermon found in many a movie, etc.

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You remember your dad’s words before you got married, “Son, women marry for love and companionship. Don’t ever forget that.” You mumble to yourself, “Well dad, you were right.” 

I remember JB telling the dad's words to Ben and Jessa, while he and Michelle were counseling them before marriage.  According to JB "men marry more for the physical stuff." Maybe that's true and maybe that's shallow bull-pucky with very oversimplified notions of gender. Do we think Steve believes this too? If you only married for the physical stuff, maybe you're bored and she's bored since you find her boring. 

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Brothers, don’t let that or worse happen to you. Love your wife. Spend lots of time with her, and cherish her. Lead her spiritually into a deeper walk with Christ.  

Again maybe if you did something other than pray it would help her to be less bored. Yes be more of a headship, treat her like a child or an object and she won't be bored. Maybe it would help if you listened to her, valued her input, let her make decisions, and generally acknowledged she's a grown adult! I don't know why, but there's something objectifying and infantilizing about this. 

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 Does she know that you would die for her? Will you live for her?

"I would dies for you" is kind of cheesy for guy to say all the time and it comes off as something they would bring up during a disagreement. Or "Honey, you know I would die for you, so come over here so we can make love another blessing."

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What about your relationship with the Lord Jesus? Do you actually have one? He took all your wretched sin and in return gave you His righteousness so you could have eternal life. Are you living every moment of your day for Him? Are you deepening your walk with Him by being in His Word and having a quality prayer time every day? He died for you – live for Him. The more you abide in Christ, the better husband you will become. 

So is the whole marriage advice metaphoric for your relationship with Jesus? Is the marriage a ploy for this redirect? So the whole point is, Jesus is bored with you since you don't spend every waking moment thinking about him, and now he wants to be just friends and go back to college and get a his dream job? Or maybe he's bored, because you don't think about anyone else?

Of course, many men, Steve, manage to be good husbands without being Christian. Being a good spouse doesn't require being a Christian, Steve.

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“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself” (Ephesians 5:25-28). 

I guess this quote is supposed to bring it all together.

This column was long, and rambling. He could have omitted the last paragraph before Ephesians, but I suspect that's the real point. 

Edited May 26, 2021 by Bluebirdbluebell

[fundiefan]

What wife would send a man to work with a note like that? If any did, there are more serious issues than the man not being godly enough. Things like taking college classes (oh, the horrors) are things couples DISCUSS. Two people having conversations about their hopes, dreams, goals, plans and concerns. 

Here's a tip Steve. Instead of sticking your nose in a bible every spare second, have an actual conversation. If you are living every moment for your god, you have no business being anyone's husband or father. Your priorities are f*cked up. 

You are, after all, the man who wrote "making great conversationalists". Conversation is not a business skill. It's a human interaction skill. 

There is nothing about his scenario that rings true, even in possibility. Steve is so stunted he can't even imagine a normal human interaction between normal human beings. 

Edited May 27, 2021 by fundiefan

[MamaJunebug]

2 hours ago, fundiefan said:

There is nothing about his scenario that rings true, even in possibility. Steve is so stunted he can't even imagine a normal human interaction between normal human beings. 

Yes, he shows it again. The most recent time I remember was the content of Making Grating Conversationalists.  The conversations within were anything but natural, much less great.  And we've seen it for years in Sarah's fiction.

Count me in with you who wonder how Christopher provides for his crew [sic]. Nathan as well.  But Chris, really really.

Did I mention the rabbi who quoted a sage as saying that if you have a call to be a physician and you reject it, you have sinned greatly? [Words to that effect, it's naptime.]  I revere people who choose to be first responders and despise Steve's action in essentially forbidding Chris from pursuing his dream of paramedicine.  But then I despise Steve's lifework for so many things.  But that one is in the top 4.

Edited May 27, 2021 by MamaJunebug

[PennySycamore]

@fundiefan,  you hit it out of the park with your post especially that second paragraph.  Men should marry for lifelong companionship, too, and not just so they can have sex without guilt.  If the guy is gonna be so tied up with god to the virtual abandonment of his family, maybe he should not marry at all.

[Bluebirdbluebell]

God help me! The new Seriously, Dad is awful. 

The title is "Times Have Changed". It's from June 2, 2021. If you know Steve, you can guess he doesn't think it's for the better.

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Are you concerned about the state of the nation and your children’s future? In our lifetime we have had the “good life,” but things have changed. Have you thought much about why the change?

Yes things change. I'm concerned about the future of the planet and the country. Climate change is real. Racism is on the rise. There was the Pandemic. And this weekend is going to be the National Gun Violence Awareness Weekend, which is an annual event due to serious problems, gun violence causes in our society. 

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God blessed this nation with everything a country could hope for: incredible climate, bountiful natural resources, a paradise of cropland, freedom of religion, a government founded with the concept of trust in God, and laws that paralleled a Judaeo Christian mindset. We have been blessed beyond measure and imagination. 

God created the world, but we created the nation. God might have made the natural resources, but we made the choice to give people freedom of religion, We The People (Remember, Steve?) created the government, and made laws that generally parallel most systems of religion. My World Religions teacher had poster of all the different religions and their versions of the golden rule. We have been blessed with a beautiful Earth, that may have come from a Big Bang, but we create our society.

If we were founded on Christian principles, how do you explain the prevalence of slavery and racism, encoded in our founding? 

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It is my opinion that the United States is God’s answer to anyone on earth or in heaven (Hebrews 12:1), who might claim God unfairly blessed and favored Israel. He brought a microcosm of all the world together in the US to represent the world. 

?‍♀️

Again we weren't created as country by God. Seriously this mindset always annoys and frustrates me. It reminds of a Catholic I knew who felt God chose our President.

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God can point to the U.S. and say “I gave you everything, if not even more than I gave Israel.  Look what you did with the blessings and freedom (Galatians 5:13) I gave you. I made the US a melting pot of the nations, but you followed the same evil path that Israel did. I judged Israel, and I must judge the United States as well.” Brothers, if God doesn’t judge the U.S., He would have to apologize to Israel, and that isn’t going to happen. 

Is this Steve speaking out against racism? He's saying God made us a melting pot, does that mean we should honor diversity and welcome people of all races, and faiths? 

Also when say judge Israel, I assume Steve means the biblical Israel or does he mean God will punish the current Israel for their treatment of Palestinians? Careful, Steve, a lot of readers may support Israel no matter what.

How do you know whether God will apologize to Israel? You presume to know the mind of God. If you read the bible, you know God gets gentler as the book goes on, and his son was a lamb. 

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What if we Christians had pursued our God wholeheartedly, “And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength” (Mark 12:30) and fervently shared Christ (Matthew 28:19), bearing fruit, instead of the pursuit of our own happiness (fun and pleasure), might this country still be the Christian nation that it was? I think not only was but better. 

Our country was literally founded on the pursuit of happiness, which comes from God. The Declaration of Independence literally says "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator [i.e. God} with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."  

I know Steve doesn't care about happiness and fun, but guess what Steve, it is hard to lure people with out some joy and fun. 

Our country was founded on the separation of Church and State, founded by We the People. 

If more and more people are forsaking religion, especially Christianity, it is because of joyless hacks like you Steve. Hacks who can't follow the words of Jesus, to not let the right hand know what the left hand is doing, to fast in secret, to remove the beam from you own eye, to only cast the first stone if you haven't sinned, etc. If you do something good, we all know about it and you're so quick to condemn others for things that are none of your business. 

What draws many people to church is how the church makes them feel. None of the feelings I had reading this make me want to join your church.

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“Herein is my Father glorified, that ye bear much fruit; so shall ye be my disciples” (John 15:8)

Good verse to describe a church, not so much a secular nation. 

[fundiefan]

So, his god made the United States? Said god intentionally massacred & destroyed the indigenous people already inhabiting this land? Took away their land and resources, killed them, brought them disease, put them in camps, destroyed their food source - all so white Europeans could come here and make the United States? Oh, wait, all so he - god - could make the US and bring white people to inhabit it. 

Steve makes me sick and this one is beyond the normal eye roll. It's made up fairy tales so he can feel superior. Fuck you Steve Maxwell. There are several reservations full of people across the country to show you what an ass your god is and want to know why he needed their land for his white boys. 

[HereticHick]

Rufus help me, another privileged white man whining about the "good old days."

[SPHASH]

In today's Seriously email Steve asks for money to be sent to missionary Seth Cuthbertson in the Ivory Coast.  No thanks I will donate any extra money I have to UMCOR or any nonprofit in the US.

Edited June 9, 2021 by SPHASH
spelling

[Jana814]

I think the Maxwell followers/fans would defiantly send them money to give to a missionary.  

[HerNameIsBuffy]

30 minutes ago, Jana814 said:

I think the Maxwell followers/fans would defiantly send them money to give to a missionary.  

How many can there be?  I'd guess less than 100, but am I wrong?

[fundiefan]

Yeah, they know their audience. Bible thumpers will send bible thumpers in places they don't belong money so they can continue to try to brainwash a local population into becoming bible thumpers.

I hold nothing but disdain for "missionaries" and think they should be illegal. 

In Steve's name, however, I will make a donation to Planned Parenthood here in the US to help underserved women, 

I have few "things" when it comes to crap like this, but any time a fundie asks for donations, I do make a donation. Only, I make said donation to an organization that actually helps people/does something I believe in. The last time I donated to my state's Democratic Party. The time before, to Biden's campaign. The last time the Maxwells shilled for the shoebox crap, I donated to to a local women's shelter.

They don't know I do it but I do and I feel good about it. It gives me an extra little push to make donating to causes I believe in more of a priority. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

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The concept of “easy” made one man billions and billions of dollars because he played to the “flesh” of customers who wanted to buy online that way. Satan led the way by playing to the flesh of billions and billions of people, purchasing them and destining them to hell. 

Is he calling Jeff Bezos Satan?  Or is Bezos the agent of Satan?

And either way, doesn't their Amazon link put them in league with the evil one?  Profiting off the Dark Prince purchasing people and sending them to hell and all?  

And when Satan purchases people to whom does he cut the check?  To purchase you need a seller.  Is God selling people to Satan, because they order from Amazon?  Or is he purchasing their souls from the people themselves, for the low low price of ease of shopping?  If so, doesn't that mean people are free beings with their own agency which flies in the face of Maxwell theology?  

Yet again after a Seriously I'm left with more questions than answers.  Probably because I'm a woman and as such not capable of understanding that which is written for men.

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However, Jesus’ command for us to follow Him isn’t easy. “If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me” (Matthew 16:24).

What has Steve denied himself?  He continues to enjoy a comfortable life, in a comfortable home, without having to work nor sacrifice anything?  

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There is a young brother with a wife and two little girls serving as missionaries in the Ivory Coast. God graciously spared his two little girls when they were deathly sick the end of last year. In their December/January newsletter, when the girls were sick, there wasn’t a hint of self pity or blaming God. Seth is a church planter and also seeking to reach men in prison. I love their hearts. Their life isn’t easy. 

God graciously spared their lives.  I think all of us would heal children of illness had we the power, that's not a particularly strong statement.  Also, had they died that would have been God's will as well so the statement is pretty meaningless.  Their life isn't easy, but Steve's is.  They can clearly afford to purchase both computers without putting out a plea.  It can come out of their mulch budget.  

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 I don’t think we have ever asked for your financial support

The scheduling stuff, chore packs, books, 1 Ton Ramp... pretty sure the whole blog and website is about keeping people around so they have people to whom they can shill their stuff.  Is that not the definition of financial support?  

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“How beautiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace, and bring glad tidings of good things!” (Romans 10:15)

So it's not just cleavage, now he's into feet.  I don't need to know this much about the inner workings of his pleasure center.

From the previous Seriously...

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God can point to the U.S. and say “I gave you everything, if not even more than I gave Israel.  Look what you did with the blessings and freedom (Galatians 5:13) I gave you. I made the US a melting pot of the nations, but you followed the same evil path that Israel did. I judged Israel, and I must judge the United States as well.” Brothers, if God doesn’t judge the U.S., He would have to apologize to Israel, and that isn’t going to happen. 

I'm going to ignore that he's putting his imaginary conversation with God in quotes like it's not fanfic and focus om the bolded (bolding mine.)  How does he know?  Frankly every person I've ever known who refuses to apologize ever has been a complete jerk.  Also, if God is using Steve as his mouthpiece he's got bigger PR problems than Harry and Meghan.

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I think not only was but better. 

My last comment and it's totally BEC but that's not a sentence, Steve.  Perhaps you can google and see if anyone with your niche religious viewpoint has written a book on being a great conversationalist that can help you with your communication skills.

Edited June 9, 2021 by HerNameIsBuffy

[ClareDeLune]

The missionary guy did preaching (and maybe prison work) while he had a fever, in a pandemic. Nice.  

 

https://us16.campaign-archive.com/?u=fa88fc3876bb3abcdc64b360e&id=c0d33c2b23

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The beginning of December began our still ongoing health saga. Seth came down with an unusually bad sore throat, as well as a fever. However, that same weekend he was scheduled to do a baptismal service near San Pédro; so he still traveled, preached, and did the baptisms, despite feeling so miserable

 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

30 minutes ago, ClareDeLune said:

The missionary guy did preaching (and maybe prison work) while he had a fever, in a pandemic. Nice.  

 

https://us16.campaign-archive.com/?u=fa88fc3876bb3abcdc64b360e&id=c0d33c2b23

 

I'm speechless.  A kiddo with seizures who was comatose reads like an afterthought after all the exclamation points like a cheerleader for their own God bothering.  What kind of parent can write that?

[bertnee]

I know people who are religious have a different perspective than I do but -- "When Eden needed her blood transfusion, there was only one bag left of her blood type. God had it waiting there especially for her! " -- wouldn't it have been better if God didn't, you know, let your young child get to the brink of death??

[HerNameIsBuffy]

3 minutes ago, bertnee said:

I know people who are religious have a different perspective than I do but -- "When Eden needed her blood transfusion, there was only one bag left of her blood type. God had it waiting there especially for her! " -- wouldn't it have been better if God didn't, you know, let your young child get to the brink of death??

Exactly!  And if they hadn't had her blood type and she recovered that would be God performing a miracle.  And if they hadn't had it and she died that would have been God's will.  So if literally everything that happens is at God's hand then they're just thankful he was what, in a generous mood that day?

[ClareDeLune]

All those missionary letters read like something off another planet. They plan to recruit one of the young girls they have converted, as a home help?  Do people usually get given chores after they are converted to white peoples religion?  It is the girls who deserve the new computers, not the lazy missionaries.

https://us16.campaign-archive.com/?u=fa88fc3876bb3abcdc64b360e&id=c411d68103

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In April, four of our girls from the village (Niezeko) prayed and asked Jesus to be their Savior! We were overjoyed to see some of these dear ones finally come to Christ. We continue to build our relationships with them and disciple them as best as we can. Several of them come over to our house a few times a week in hopes of getting to play on our playhouse in our yard. They are always sweet and make sure to clean up whatever messes they make-- and ones they didn't! It's hard to convince them that they don't have to sweep our driveway and clean our yard every time they come over. And if they come over while we're doing yard work, they are happy to jump in and help. We will often have a brief bible lesson before they leave, and they usually get some sort of treat on their way out-- lollipops, or a piece of gum, or some small packs of cookies. Eventually, we hope to hire one of these girls as a house-helper to come and help with some work/chores a couple of times a week. Please continue to pray for these kids! We long to see more of them come to Jesus! 

 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

17 minutes ago, ClareDeLune said:

All those missionary letters read like something off another planet. They plan to recruit one of the young girls they have converted, as a home help?  Do people usually get given chores after they are converted to white peoples religion?  It is the girls who deserve the new computers, not the lazy missionaries.

https://us16.campaign-archive.com/?u=fa88fc3876bb3abcdc64b360e&id=c411d68103

 

By hire I hope they mean pay a fair wage for reasonable work.  

[fundiefan]

7 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

By hire I hope they mean pay a fair wage for reasonable work.  

They mean save the brown girl & show her how to live like a white evangelical.