Maxwell 31: InVESTing in Quality Bible Bindings

[LilMissMetaphor]

That's cheap and sad.  They have plenty of money.  If they don't want to take the time to buy individual gifts for each kid that shows they actually give a shit about likes and personalities, get them a $10 or $20 gift card (heck, divide it by age if you're so worried about being fair, $10 for age ten and under, $20 for older), boom.  The kids get to pick out something they actually want and you can work it right into your precious budget.

Or buy actual experiences for them that don't involve sitting on the floor in the living room. 

[nvmbr02]

When grandparents live physically close to their grandchildren and they are playing a somewhat active role in the lives of their grandchildren like Teri and Steve preach about you would expect them to have the type of quality one on one time with each of their grandchildren on a regular on going basis, not as a special gift. It should just be a given. I do understand that gifts with that many grandchildren can get very expensive, especially as families keeping growing. My grandparents on my dad's side didn't give expensive gifts either, but we always got a small thoughtful gift for Christmas and a slightly larger, well thought out gift for birthdays (I am assuming because the could spread the expense out at birthdays a bit ) Sleepovers at grandma and grandpa's house were fairly frequent. Sometimes it was just one of us, sometimes a sibling group and other times it was a cousin group. Often times it was a spur of the moment decision and we all slept in my grandfather's t shirts. 

It is sad that the Maxwell grandchildren don't have that. 

[MamaJunebug]

27 minutes ago, LilMissMetaphor said:

That's cheap and sad.  They have plenty of money.  If they don't want to take the time to buy individual gifts for each kid that shows they actually give a shit about likes and personalities, get them a $10 or $20 gift card (heck, divide it by age if you're so worried about being fair, $10 for age ten and under, $20 for older), boom.  The kids get to pick out something they actually want and you can work it right into your precious budget.

Or buy actual experiences for them that don't involve sitting on the floor in the living room. 

I’m all for experiences over things, but I’m old. The kids can’t be too aware of toys, living without tv to blast the ads. I’m sure their training includes Parental Iron Hands on the shopping carts at Walmart, too. Toy aisle?? Prayer closet!

Most of all, these people see each other daily. So to see someone one-on-one, that’s a huge treat? Snore. 

But the kids may have so little in the way of amusement otherwise that this indeed a big deal. Mind, boggled.

[louannems]

4 hours ago, fundiewatch said:

New post up. Steve and Terri are offering their grandkids a special night at the MaxBorg instead of birthday gifts. Terri got right on scheduling. 

My lord this family is dull. 

In one of the pictures, a grandson is reading the Bible with Grandpa.  What an exciting birthday gift!  Don't they do that every day, all day, anyway?

[OhNoNike]

3 hours ago, Flossie said:

I assume Sarah wrote up the event in her own inimitable style.

Dad and Mom are blessed to have such a growing group of grandkids! Over the past 10 years, Mom shopped and kept up with a gift each child would like.

Recently, they had an idea. Instead of a physical gift, the child gets a special evening over at Grandpa and Grandma’s. There is a string of summer birthdays, so Mom got right on scheduling.

The kids have totally loved their special time. After all, isn’t the gift of quality time something to be valued?

We began with Abby, then Joshua, and last Christina. Up next will be Danny and Drew, the birthday-cousin-twins. They will have separate nights.

“And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”  Philippians 4:7

What does this extra special time with the grandparents consist of?  Dinner alone with the grandfolks, and their adult aunts and uncle who are still living at home.  Perhaps the meal consists of meatless burritos, a fancy layered salad, and milk or water?  Two animal crackers for dessert?  Such luxury!  Better pray before the excitement gets too intense, don't want to sin by experiencing joy.

No problem, Steve is right there to give them a special sermon tailored just for them.  Dare we hope that it's recorded so their parents can play it every night while the children sleep?

Teri plans to read them a story from her selection of approved books, providing that she can stop exactly 15 minutes in.  Then she'll stop.  No worries, Steve will finish the story and bless the little one with an in depth explanation of how such a seemingly benign story could be misconstrued to lead them to the path of unrighteousness, but he's there to set them straight.

After that is a rousing game of Uno or Go Fish, with plenty of teachable moments to instill the children with a sense of fair play, and how to win or lose in a Godly manner.  Winning means they must give the glory to God and not display an unmodest amount of pride in their triumph.  Losing means they must deny Satan's attempt to bring them down by admitting that they were beaten fair and square, exhibiting only pleasure for the winner, suppressing any disappointment in the loss and foregoing to say "Best two out of three?"

Yeah, sounds like a ton of fun.

Well fuck.  Time with grandkids isn’t a new fucking idea.  

I’m usually a “give my kids time” more than a present kind of mom, but these kids already get a lot of time, don’t they?  I mean - they rarely get new things, amiright?

Jesus these people are boring AF. 

So sorry for the cussing. 

Edited July 8, 2019 by OhNoNike

[Lgirlrocks]

My grandma didn’t have a lot of money. She gambled most of it away. She had 7 grand kids and 5 great grand kids before she passed away. She would give all the little kids a dollar bill and a candy bar for Chanukah and the older kids a candy bar. For our birthdays she would send us a card with our age made of coins. Usually nickels and pennies unless it was a special birthday. We loved it because we knew it was what she could do. I also spent a lot of time with her. When I was old enough to drive I helped out with the grocery shopping. I also stayed the night once a month or so and helped out around her place.  I would find this sweeter if they took their grand kids and did stuff with them they don’t usually do. Like a trip to the zoo or something. 

When I was little my aunt would take, which ever niece or nephews birthday it was, to the movies and to dinner. She would also take me clothes shopping and let me pick a few things out. I grew up wearing hand me downs. 

[SusanAtTheLastBattle]

The saddest part to me is this:

Quote

Over the past 10 years, Mom shopped and kept up with a gift each child would like.

This is not about less stuff and more time, that's an excuse. This is about not wanting to "keep up" with the individual interests and personalities of their grandkids. Replace it with something 100% featureless and exchangeable, and get to scheduling! 

[grammyj]

Yep. That is cheap and sad. At least find out if the grandkids have a special place they like to go, say a zoo, or wait, they dont go anywhere non-family humans might go unless it's Nursing Home Church, right?  Maybe the odd Aldi run? Or Bass Pro for Special Treat.

Not even a meal out with just T and S like McD's or Cracker Barrel?  Nope.

On a slightly different note, Im thinking about when Ellie has her pups. I hope to goodness they don't allow the grandkids to pester/maul  the puppies. I can see this happening under heading of "educating" gkids about how puppies grow or something like that.

So are the Maxwells hurting for money or just damn cheap? $2000. for a pup. Nothing special  (except some time set aside to read Bible and stuff) for gkids birthday? C"mon....

 

[OhNoNike]

10 minutes ago, SusanAtTheLastBattle said:

The saddest part to me is this:

This is not about less stuff and more time, that's an excuse. This is about not wanting to "keep up" with the individual interests and personalities of their grandkids. Replace it with something 100% featureless and exchangeable, and get to scheduling! 

The other part of that, to me, was - oh you had a bunch of kids who in turn have a bunch of kids.  All the older kids got personalized gifts but now there are SO many kids, the newer members of the family don’t get the same as the older.  

 Now I know this is often the case - newer siblings and family members don’t get the same experience. But this is also boasted online publicly.  

[freejugar]

The  family  that loves children  seems to  think of  their  birthdays as a dreadful chore  and a waste of  money, and  has  decided to put the least  amount of effort into  them. 

[danvillebelle]

I can tell you exactly ONE physical gift my maternal gma gave me in the 30 years I had her in my life - because it's a LL Bean wool blanket that I still own and use every winter.

But every summer from about age 8 all the way to 16, I spent two weeks at her house.  She let me stay up and watch TV as late as I wanted and sleep in the next day.  She made my favorite breakfast every day (poached eggs).  She made sure my favorite cookies were in the breadbox drawer and my favorite popsicles were in the freezer.  She trusted me to take off on the bike and be gone for hours (something my parents would never do).  And she always planned an overnight trip to some historical site or Mammoth Cave, with my cousin along for the ride. 

I have no problem with them not giving physical gifts with that many grandkids.  But for Christ's sake, DO SOMETHING WITH THEM BESIDES SIT IN YOUR FUCKING LIVING ROOM READING THE BIBLE AND PLAYING UNO!  They do that every day!  

32 minutes ago, freejugar said:

The  family  that loves children  seems to  think of  their  birthdays as a dreadful chore  and a waste of  money, and  has  decided to put the least  amount of effort into  them. 

And yet, they will spend hundreds of dollars on useless plastic crap to stuff in shoeboxes and send to kids overseas, who don't need any of it.  

[Black Aliss]

I'm thinking money is getting a bit tight at Chez Maxwell, what with the band breaking up and the bookings having fallen off. Regardless, I'm all for experiences over stuff, but it needs to be a special (not necessarily costly) experience, not something they do at least once a week, year 'round. Are there really no G- or PG-rated movies that Steve and OfSteve would find acceptable? Could they really not ask the birthday child if there is some event or experience that they would like to attend? (rhetorical questions)

Poor Abby. "Your birthday present is dinner with Grandma and Grandpa. At their house."

[danvillebelle]

Here Stevehovah, I'll make it really easy for you:

http://www.tripbuzz.com/things-to-do-with-kids/leavenworth-ks

There are 97 things to do on that list.  Surely you can get off your holier-than-thou ass and do a few of them.

1 minute ago, Black Aliss said:

Steve and OfSteve

[SPHASH]

9 minutes ago, danvillebelle said:

I can tell you exactly ONE physical gift my maternal gma gave me in the 30 years I had her in my life - because it's a LL Bean wool blanket that I still own and use every winter.

But every summer from about age 8 all the way to 16, I spent two weeks at her house.  She let me stay up and watch TV as late as I wanted and sleep in the next day.  She made my favorite breakfast every day (poached eggs).  She made sure my favorite cookies were in the breadbox drawer and my favorite popsicles were in the freezer.  She trusted me to take off on the bike and be gone for hours (something my parents would never do).  And she always planned an overnight trip to some historical site or Mammoth Cave, with my cousin along for the ride. 

I have no problem with them not giving physical gifts with that many grandkids.  But for Christ's sake, DO SOMETHING WITH THEM BESIDES SIT IN YOUR FUCKING LIVING ROOM READING THE BIBLE AND PLAYING UNO!  They do that every day!  

And yet, they will spend hundreds of dollars on useless plastic crap to stuff in shoeboxes and send to kids overseas, who don't need any of it.  

This!  I understand with 14 grandkids plus one on the way it can get pricey for gifts but like someone mentioned give them a gift card or maybe even some crisp paper money. I gave my goddaughter a crisp $2 bill one time and she loved it.  As for one on one time instead of having dinner with Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Forgotten Jesse and the spinster aunts why not have a picnic NOT at the Auntie's park or the local ebil public school playground but at a state park or recreation area.  They could explore and hike instead of playing Uno.  As for the younger kids like Kyle, Elizabeth, Axton, and Debbie I doubt they would get much out of quality time with the grandparents cuz they are all under 18 months.  Also they already have Grandparents night weekly and Grandmas annual spring picnic.

[tehfanglyfish]

I've been a mostly-lurker on FJ for years (like back in the yuku days). It takes a lot to motivate me to make the effort to actually log in and type out a post but today's Maxwell birthday post broke my heart and so here I am.

When I was very young, I had relatives who had WAAAAAAAY fewer financial resources than the Maxwells and they still put more effort into birthdays. And more effort into just generally enjoying life, if the full truth is told.

(Full disclosure, every last one of my relatives would have professed to being a Christian, even though they did sometimes like to have f*n. I'm now a godless heathen, but that came from abuse and manipulation and control - not having fun.)

Even without a lot of cash, why not take a trip to a new park? They could even grill there for the novelty of it.

I realize the kids might get exposed to worldly corruptions, like talking animals, but libraries often have a lot of free events for small kids, especially in the summer.

It might cost a little more, but bowling alleys often have cheap rates during off times, like weekday mornings/afternoons. Though I know they don't believe it, these people have far more flexibility with scheduling than most folks. Take advantage of times when they offer $2 games (because with little kids you probably only need one round) or free shoe rental.

Haven't kept up with what everyone likes? Walmart sells giant (as in 7 oz) Hershey bars for around $2. Those are probably a safe bet with most kids who have teeth. (Yes, they will be wild with all of that sugar but only for a day and they may not even finish it - the size and deviation from the norm are the key here.) My guess is that the list of kids who don't like chocolate is relatively short and easier to keep up with.

For a non-chocolate option, go to McDonald's for an ice cream cone. It's on the dollar menu and if you don't do that sort of thing often, is actually a lot of fun. Pick a McDonald's with a playground for extra time outside of the compound. If cash isn't too tight, maybe get a happy meal too? Oh look. We've now added a toy to today's scheduled outing. 

I had a grandmother who did crafting. She made stuffed animals for her grandchildren, sometimes using scrap fabric, which saved her money and honestly made it even more special for those who received one (I have mine decades later and it is one of my most prized possessions.) 

Anyway, I could seethe for the rest of the day but I think I'll go do something sinful like actually enjoy my day. 

Edited July 8, 2019 by tehfanglyfish
riffle

[PennySycamore]

My husband and I spent a few days with my daughter, her husband and 3 of our grandkids last week in the Adirondacks.  On the Fourth, we went to my son-in-law's sister's cabin at the lake to spend the day.  The best thing about that day:  putting on my running skirt (I was stupid not to bring my swimsuit!) and wading with my grandchildren: six, four, and two and a half.    This part of the lake has a sandbar and is pretty shallow so you don't have to stay right next to the shore.   My two and a half year old granddaughter wanted to touch the two buoys and to chase the mallards swimming nearby.   She could not understand why she could not lift the mooring buoy.  It had this nice handle on it pull it out of the water!  I could have spent all afternoon out there with them.  

[Lgirlrocks]

I’m sure there are lots of free or cheap things they could do with the grands. They could do a movie night at home, evil I know. Make a special craft or desert. To bad they aren’t against fun. They could do a free concert in the park or go see an outdoor play, those are usually free. I’m going to he?? for mentioning it I know. 

[Odd1Out]

I agree that store-bought gifts aren’t necessary but they could have thrown in a little something for the grandkids birthdays. Spending an evening with ho-hum grandparents and the single uncle and aunts issnt special in my opinion. Although these kids from large families are probably in need of some undivided attention, it needs to be more than a card game and more Bible time. 

[Rosie]

3 hours ago, MamaJunebug said:

I’m all for experiences over things, but I’m old. The kids can’t be too aware of toys, living without tv to blast the ads. I’m sure their training includes Parental Iron Hands on the shopping carts at Walmart, too. Toy aisle?? Prayer closet!

Most of all, these people see each other daily. So to see someone one-on-one, that’s a huge treat? Snore. 

But the kids may have so little in the way of amusement otherwise that this indeed a big deal. Mind, boggled.

I am all for experiences over things as well, but by "experience" I would mean, "an out-of-the-ordinary outing or adventure."  So,  if I had a grandchild to whom I wanted to give an experience as a birthday gift, that would mean a gift certificate for e.g. breakfast out and an amusement park visit, or dinner and a show in a theater, or invite a friend and pick a movie and I'll take you both to the movie and out for ice cream sundaes, or let's go on a whitewater rafting trip, or a floating down the river trip followed by a picnic, or ... you get my drift.

Playing cards on the living room floor coupled with a hot dog for dinner is not an "experience" in the "give an experience as a gift" sense of the term. 

[mango_fandango]

Totally agree with what y’all are saying. All the grandkids seem to have done is play a game, have dinner together, then Bible time. That’s not what I’d call an experience, or much of a “gift”. That’s the kind of things they ALWAYS freaking do! The specific game and specific meal might be different for each kid, but it’s not really “special” if they’re essentially the same damn thing for each grandchild. It’d be more special if Steve and OfSteve took the kid out to a restaurant, even. TeriSteve really seem to have no dang imagination (which I know is seen as baaaaaad in Maxhell) and it’s just so sad. 

[IReallyAmHopewell]

I'm with the rest of you--an experience to me means something the child has on [hate the term] his/her Bucket List. Maybe something like a trip to see the dinosaur bones at an out-of-town museum, or going to a MLB game or paying an extortionist rate to make cupcakes at that birthday party cupcake place. But being dropped off at the Grandparents to play Uno??

If they don't have money for Bucket list items, then maybe build a small bookshelf together or bake cupcakes with Grandma or??? But this seems to lack a lot even for the Maxwell.s

[Odd1Out]

I wonder what they will do with the kids that are under 3 or 4. You know Teri can’t handle the really little ones. 

[SPHASH]

Looks like the dinners were lazy too.  Abby and Josh ate hot dogs and poor Tina had to eat burritos.  Why not fix a good meal like spaghetti or tacos.

[FloraKitty35]

Stevehovah's face looks gaunt.

[courtlylove]

41 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Looks like the dinners were lazy too.  Abby and Josh ate hot dogs and poor Tina had to eat burritos.  Why not fix a good meal like spaghetti or tacos.

Or something my grandkids love, 'build your own pizza'. Store bought or home made pizza bases and a range of toppings.