Zach and Whitney Bates - part 4

[elliha]

Well, I think a lot of women are both happy to go back to work and feel sad about leaving their kid with a babysitter/daycare. I know I found it hard both times and my kids were 19 and 13 months when it happened. I still thought it was nice to go to work and do something more "adult". Now that I have worked for about 6 months I am starting to long to be at home with them again but that might happen through working more part time and not by me becoming a SAHM. 

[crazysnark]

Turns out Kelly's intuition was right with Whitney. Don't get me wrong I am SO glad Whitney and Zach are headed this direction but Kelly was less than thrilled when Zach started dating Whitney because deep down she knew that Whitney wouldn't tow the line for long. I did get from the episode that Zach wasn't very happy with her working and not having a gaggle of children most likely but he was trying his best to be supportive (on camera at least). 

[HermioneSparrow]

Go Whitney go! I hope she stands her ground and doesn't cave in to the Bates' demands.

[ophelia]

 

8 hours ago, crazysnark said:

Turns out Kelly's intuition was right with Whitney. Don't get me wrong I am SO glad Whitney and Zach are headed this direction but Kelly was less than thrilled when Zach started dating Whitney because deep down she knew that Whitney wouldn't tow the line for long. I did get from the episode that Zach wasn't very happy with her working and not having a gaggle of children most likely but he was trying his best to be supportive (on camera at least). 

I hope Whitney can find her way and that Zach loves and supports her. Hopefully Kelly and Gil stay the fuck out of their marriage and don't blame them for doing thins different.

@crazysnark what gives you the feeling that Kelly wasn't happy about Whitney in the first place? I can totally imagine that too, but was there ever a comment or anything from her or Whitney that would indicate this?

[crazysnark]

4 hours ago, ophelia said:

what gives you the feeling that Kelly wasn't happy about Whitney in the first place? I can totally imagine that too, but was there ever a comment or anything from her or Whitney that would indicate this?

I don't think she ever commented directly at Whitney but she was still trying to get other fundie girls interested in Zach while he was dating Whitney. They also had been basically dating since mid 2012 but Kelly was tight tight lipped about her that she didn't appear on the blog until the actual courtship started a year later. IIRC they only had a 2 month courtship and 3 month engagement. She basically was hoping the relationship woudn't last so she didn't say anything, and in Kelly world that says a lot more than passive agrressive posts she likes to make. 

[Seculardaisy]

12 hours ago, crazysnark said:

Turns out Kelly's intuition was right with Whitney. Don't get me wrong I am SO glad Whitney and Zach are headed this direction but Kelly was less than thrilled when Zach started dating Whitney because deep down she knew that Whitney wouldn't tow the line for long. I did get from the episode that Zach wasn't very happy with her working and not having a gaggle of children most likely but he was trying his best to be supportive (on camera at least). 

I also got the impression that Zach isn’t over the moon about Whit’s job. Normally he has a lot to say and he stayed very silent, uncomfortably so. His face did not read of excitement or joy.

[wandering woman]

I'm glad Whitney is working. Dumping the kids off at Kelly and Gil's house or her parents house every time she goes to work is going to become a burden for the adults who watch the kids. 

The Bates girls will end up babysitting them. Carlin is at college much of the day, I'm sure, so Katie and the younger females will bear the burden.

 It saves Whitney a lot of money, but it is asking a lot of the two families.

[Bazinga]

On 2/2/2018 at 6:28 PM, Seculardaisy said:

Watching that episode made me feel bad that Whitney is living in this cult where she has to grasp at straws to find a reason why she is getting a job outside of the home. “I wanted to find a way to give back and help others.” Come on. Real Estate is not a ministry. Just say you wanted a job, it’s not a sin.

And then the whole song and dance about “being so sad to leave them with a babysitter.” And all of the explanation hat she won’t be gone from the house too much. It just seemed like they were putting on a show to remind us that Whitney is a mom first. It’s okay to want a career and it’s okay to want a break from your kids!

It’s also sad that she implied that they had to sit and discuss appropriate jobs for her to have and came up with Real Estate. It didn’t sound so much like she wanted to be a Real  Estate agent, just that she wanted a job and this was the only one deemed appropriate.

I kind of wonder if they deemed real estate an ok job, because she really doesn't have to work much.... Case in point, she posted about her job on Instagram back in October, and just sold her first house a couple days ago. Makes me wonder how much she is really getting out there and hustling, or if this is really like an ehhhh, if I feel like working today, I'll go in.

On 2/3/2018 at 2:32 PM, elliha said:

Well, I think a lot of women are both happy to go back to work and feel sad about leaving their kid with a babysitter/daycare. I know I found it hard both times and my kids were 19 and 13 months when it happened. I still thought it was nice to go to work and do something more "adult". Now that I have worked for about 6 months I am starting to long to be at home with them again but that might happen through working more part time and not by me becoming a SAHM. 

I totally agree with you, but there was a big difference for me dropping my kids off with my mom versus a stranger I just met a few days prior. I've done both. I felt much now anguish doing my kids off at daycare versus with their grandparents (whom I knew would be spoiling them and cultivating great relationships). Her boohooing over dropping her kids off with Gil and Kelly (when we know her and Zach have gone on numerous vacations and dates before this and had left the kids with them before) seemed like a plot point for the show, to as another poster pointed out, make Whitney look like she really is a stay at home mom first (ahem when it suits her).

[JordynDarby5]

11 hours ago, Seculardaisy said:

I also got the impression that Zach isn’t over the moon about Whit’s job. Normally he has a lot to say and he stayed very silent, uncomfortably so. His face did not read of excitement or joy.

So did I. He usually isn't quiet and he really didn't look excited about it. I didn't like her at the house basically making it sound like she wasn't going to be working that much or making it sound like real estate is ministry.  Its sad to see her trying to justify it. There's nothing wrong with you working Whitney. Ignore anyone who says there is.

[Hisey]

3 hours ago, JordynDarby5 said:

So did I. He usually isn't quiet and he really didn't look excited about it. I didn't like her at the house basically making it sound like she wasn't going to be working that much or making it sound like real estate is ministry.  Its sad to see her trying to justify it. There's nothing wrong with you working Whitney. Ignore anyone who says there is.

Actually, the real estate agents I have met did not give me a "ministry" vibe at all. It was all about the money, getting you into a house whether it was really right for you or not. Similarly, when I've sold homes, it was the same way. Push, push, push people in the direction of getting their commission as fast as possible. I had one RE agent (representing me!) try to stop me from reading the closing papers! I wanted to read them ahead of closing and he used every excuse in the book (including lying) to get me to stop. I finally said I wouldn't go through with the sale unless I did. That stopped him cold.

I realize there are some good ones out there--I even know a few. But my overwhelming experience has been that they are not in the business as a  "ministry."

[just_ordinary]

The ministry line is just stupid. Probably Whitney finally feels comfortable enough in her marriage and the relationship to her parents in law to be more herself again. Maybe she realised being a fundie SHAM is boring for her. I would also bet money on them needing the extra cash. 

I don’t watch the whole show but from the few bits I have seen on the internet he often let’s her talk. It is especially with his brothers when he dominates the TH. But my impression could be clouded as I haven’t seen a lot.

On another note, I can somewhat understand if Zach needs some time with this new situation. He believed he married a woman who would happily be a SHAM. Things, circumstances and people change all the time and you have to roll with it but it is fine to need time to adjustment. If I decide tomorrow to be a SHAM my husband would not be happy, same goes for me if he decides being a SAHD. That is not what we signed up for. 

He didn’t seem to do anything to hold her back and didn’t make any snide comments so maybe he is still adjusting or he is actually very supportive- who knows? 

I am very happy that she and her shiny Instagram will sell the idea that it is possible for young fundie mothers to pursue a job outside of the home. A job that you need training for and that puts you in a very active and social position (treating customers with respect etc.). Her very cheesy perfect feed might unintentionally do that.

[KeshetParparNesicha]

43 minutes ago, just_ordinary said:

Maybe she realised being a fundie SHAM is boring for her.

I know this is a typo, but I love it.

[Hisey]

38 minutes ago, just_ordinary said:

 

I am very happy that she and her shiny Instagram will sell the idea that it is possible for young fundie mothers to pursue a job outside of the home. A job that you need training for and that puts you in a very active and social position (treating customers with respect etc.). Her very cheesy perfect feed might unintentionally do that.

I dunno. I'm happy, and I"m not. Whitney has built in childcare. She has a MIL and lots of SILs who live close by, who are always home and who have the time. How common is that scenario? What are those other fundy women going to feel if they can't pull off what Whitney is pulling off? 

In a way, she is misleading all those women. "I work while Zach is at home." Bull. Realtors jump when their clients say to jump. If a buyer is available to see a house tomorrow, you'd better take him tomorrow or a) the house get sold out from under you, or the buyer will find someone else to take them. When I was looking for a house, we'd peruse realtor.com at night, find a house new to the market, then email our realtor who would set up something for the next day. I wouldn't have been willing to wait till Zach's next day off, and since there'd be no contractual relationship between me and Whitney, I could easily move to a different realtor.

 

[just_ordinary]

1 minute ago, Hisey said:

I dunno. I'm happy, and I"m not. Whitney has built in childcare. She has a MIL and lots of SILs who live close by, who are always home and who have the time. How common is that scenario? What are those other fundy women going to feel if they can't pull off what Whitney is pulling off? 

In a way, she is misleading all those women. "I work while Zach is at home." Bull. Realtors jump when their clients say to jump. If a buyer is available to see a house tomorrow, you'd better take him tomorrow or a) the house get sold out from under you, or the buyer will find someone else to take them. When I was looking for a house, we'd peruse realtor.com at night, find a house new to the market, then email our realtor who would set up something for the next day. I wouldn't have been willing to wait till Zach's next day off, and since there'd be no contractual relationship between me and Whitney, I could easily move to a different realtor.

 

That is true. She makes her life look very very easy and charming. I was thinking more about her showing that it IS possible, but you’re right. If her message is heard a lot of those women might struggle with how to organise it. But that mustn’t mean the message will drown. 

I don’t want to give her too much credit though. She will hardly be the “breaker of chains”- so to say. If at all it will be unintentional.

[elliha]

2 hours ago, Hisey said:

I dunno. I'm happy, and I"m not. Whitney has built in childcare. She has a MIL and lots of SILs who live close by, who are always home and who have the time. How common is that scenario? What are those other fundy women going to feel if they can't pull off what Whitney is pulling off? 

In a way, she is misleading all those women. "I work while Zach is at home." Bull. Realtors jump when their clients say to jump. If a buyer is available to see a house tomorrow, you'd better take him tomorrow or a) the house get sold out from under you, or the buyer will find someone else to take them. When I was looking for a house, we'd peruse realtor.com at night, find a house new to the market, then email our realtor who would set up something for the next day. I wouldn't have been willing to wait till Zach's next day off, and since there'd be no contractual relationship between me and Whitney, I could easily move to a different realtor.

 

Hopefully noticing that it doesn't work out might spur the creation of a totally not-a-daycare daycare that some women can run while other go to work. One can hope... 

[lizzybee]

I took her saying "I worked my way through college" and "I wanted to give something back to the community," as meaning "I like to work and went to college expecting to work throughout my adult life," and "I find work meaningful and want to be a contributing member of society via the workforce." Zach was quiet, but I don't think he was bothered by her choice. Also if you watch closely, there's a least twice he goes to chime in and the clip is cut as he starts to talk. I think the editor was mostly interested in hearing from Whitney on the topic of her job. 

[nokidsmom]

18 hours ago, just_ordinary said:

The ministry line is just stupid. Probably Whitney finally feels comfortable enough in her marriage and the relationship to her parents in law to be more herself again. Maybe she realised being a fundie SHAM is boring for her. I would also bet money on them needing the extra cash. 

I never thought Whitney would toe the fundie line for long.    Just had a sense that she was going along because she was in love, was very young and wanted to be accepted by her in-law family.   She's older now and probably has a better sense of what she really wants, coupled with her working and going to school in the past, she's ready to do something else besides just be a SAHM.   And bringing in extra money helps.  

And furthermore, I never thought Whitney ever fully ditched the pants.  She's just at the point where she's comfortable going public wearing jeans again. 

[OhNoNike]

8 hours ago, lizzybee said:

I took her saying "I worked my way through college" and "I wanted to give something back to the community," as meaning "I like to work and went to college expecting to work throughout my adult life," and "I find work meaningful and want to be a contributing member of society via the workforce." Zach was quiet, but I don't think he was bothered by her choice. Also if you watch closely, there's a least twice he goes to chime in and the clip is cut as he starts to talk. I think the editor was mostly interested in hearing from Whitney on the topic of her job. 

To be honest, I think they’d be damned either way.  If he chimed in, someone would say it doesn’t get to be her thing and why does Zach have a say, etc. 

i actually thought it was nice they just showed her point of view. For once. It reinforces it’s her thing- something fundies get criticized about not supporting. 

[Seculardaisy]

22 hours ago, Hisey said:

Actually, the real estate agents I have met did not give me a "ministry" vibe at all. It was all about the money, getting you into a house whether it was really right for you or not. Similarly, when I've sold homes, it was the same way. Push, push, push people in the direction of getting their commission as fast as possible. I had one RE agent (representing me!) try to stop me from reading the closing papers! I wanted to read them ahead of closing and he used every excuse in the book (including lying) to get me to stop. I finally said I wouldn't go through with the sale unless I did. That stopped him cold.

I realize there are some good ones out there--I even know a few. But my overwhelming experience has been that they are not in the business as a  "ministry."

For the record Whitney never explicitly said this was her ministry. She said she was doing real estate as a way to give back to the community. I’m the one who said she was making it seem like a ministry. 

I feel like some people might be misinterpreting what I meant. I don’t want to put words in Whit’s mouth. 

[JordynDarby5]

7 hours ago, Seculardaisy said:

For the record Whitney never explicitly said this was her ministry. She said she was doing real estate as a way to give back to the community. I’m the one who said she was making it seem like a ministry. 

I feel like some people might be misinterpreting what I meant. I don’t want to put words in Whit’s mouth. 

That's what it sounded like to me too. Real estate isn't something you do to give back to the community unless its something like Habitat for Humanity. But it seemed like she had to say something to explain why she was working. Just like when she was trying to make it sound like she would hardly be working at all. Its stupid that  a grown woman having to justify getting a job. I'd rather she explain why she chose real estate. Was it something she was interested in or was it a new interest.             

[jakesykora]

On 2/4/2018 at 4:49 AM, crazysnark said:

I don't think she ever commented directly at Whitney but she was still trying to get other fundie girls interested in Zach while he was dating Whitney. They also had been basically dating since mid 2012 but Kelly was tight tight lipped about her that she didn't appear on the blog until the actual courtship started a year later. IIRC they only had a 2 month courtship and 3 month engagement. She basically was hoping the relationship woudn't last so she didn't say anything, and in Kelly world that says a lot more than passive agrressive posts she likes to make. 

And I've been on the other end of the spectrum - having long figured her silence was probably more due to it being a relationship following his broken up one w/ Sarah and so not wanting to risk a second broken courtship that was public (and in a relatively short time frame)

Similar to the fact that I think Josiah and Lauren have likely had a much more extensive relationship that was held off on being hinted at (let alone shared widely) until it's probably much further along/more serious (and that's likely being saved for the show) but I suspect they let that 'brew' longer since Josiah also had a publicized courtship end.

Heck, the (crazy extreme) Maxwells took things so far following the broken engagement of one of their sons that they didn't even post about the subsequent year long courtship OR engagement until he was actually married to his now wife! 

[JillyO]

I don't watch BUB, so I didn't see the TH with Whit and Zach. However, what you guys describe sounds exactly like her description on the real estate company's website:

Quote

We are excited to welcome Whitney Bates to Bailey & Co. Real Estate.

Whitney comes to the real estate industry with a background in medical billing and coding along with being a momma to Bradley & Kaci Lynn and a wife to her husband, Zach.

When I first met Whitney she said, “The most important thing to me is being in a position to actually take care of people. That’s the only reason I got my license… because I believed I could help people during an important time in their lives.”

Being a Broker I meet with a lot of different agents. I knew Whitney was the type of agent we were looking for when I heard about her heart to truly serve people. Whitney is a kind soul who will be a perfect fit in our core desire to value people over profit as we change the perception of what it means to be a Realtor in the Knoxville and Greater Knoxville market.

Justin Bailey
Principle Broker | Owner
Bailey & Co. Real Estate

http://baileycorealestate.com/whitney-bates-joins-bailey-co/

Whitney currently only has two listings. Can someone who knows more about being a realtor explain a little bit about what that means for how much time she probably spends on this and also her earning potential? I've looked at some of the company's other affiliate brokers, and there appear to be many who only have two properties listed, while others have significantly more (only lady has over 40 listings).

[Lovebug]

On 2/4/2018 at 10:06 AM, wandering woman said:

It saves Whitney a lot of money, but it is asking a lot of the two families.

Wandering woman you're right, and I totally get what you're saying, sister! 

But as far as Gil and Kelly are concerned I can only think - do you know what else is asking a lot?  Having your kids raise your kids and run your household so you can make more kids for them to raise and run.  Because of that, I sincerely hope Zach and Whit (and all the marrieds!) drop their kids off as often as possible, and when Gil and Kelly are solo.  Perhaps they will actually get a glimpse of what it's like to take care of a baby.

Whitney, keep on trucking along selling houses in your pants, while your in-laws babysit!  Oh, and if you guys could stop spewing your hateful views, that would be awesome, too.  Thanks girl!

 

 

[neurogirl]

As usual, Whit and Zach look great. Hoping that the updates she shares soon will be all work and house related!  As much as Chad and Erin are my pet fundies, I think Whit and Zach could be the ones to watch for further big life changes and transitioning to fundie-lite as much as that's a thing.

[Hisey]

9 hours ago, JillyO said:

I don't watch BUB, so I didn't see the TH with Whit and Zach. However, what you guys describe sounds exactly like her description on the real estate company's website:

http://baileycorealestate.com/whitney-bates-joins-bailey-co/

Whitney currently only has two listings. Can someone who knows more about being a realtor explain a little bit about what that means for how much time she probably spends on this and also her earning potential? I've looked at some of the company's other affiliate brokers, and there appear to be many who only have two properties listed, while others have significantly more (only lady has over 40 listings).

I'm not a realtor but I have bought and sold houses. I think you can be successful and only have two listings. I suspect that having two listings is actually pretty good for a brand new broker. Having a listing seems like a lot of work if you do it right--your job is to promote and market the house, and that can take many forms. Bad realtors just hope the house will sell itself. Good realtors are always trying to find ways to market their listings.

Some realtors seem to specialize in buyers, so it may be possible that Whitney has several  buyers that she's working with. That means she'd be busy showing them house after house, and then helping them figure out what they can afford.

One thing that I've learned is that realtors often have to put a considerable amount of money into listing a house. They pay for all the marketing--the signs, the newspaper ads (in the olden days), the fancy brochures, the photographer, etc. They might split some of this with their broker, but I know Whitney will need some cash up front in order to market those listings. 

As for income, I don't know. At best, realtors make about 5-6% of the sale price. They have to split that with the other realtor 50-50. Part of their share goes to their broker, and, then they have to pay all their marketing expenses. I actually have no idea how much a beginner like Whitney might make, but if property values are low in their part of TN, it may take a while till she makes any real money.