Lori Alexander 30: Bad Speller, Worse Teacher, the Worst Mentor

[HoneyBunny]

Lori, I have news for you. You still are very selfish, and you still are ugly (speaking of her heart here, don’t jump on me). There’s no “use (sic) to be” about it. 

[TeddyBonkers]

I will never have a million dollar house, or one with 6 bedrooms, but I LOVE to have people over. Especially at the holidays, when there are soldiers that can't go home, I open up my house. I make a metric shit-ton of food, gallons of artillery punch, and say come on in. It may not be the fanciest spread (my China is from Walmart) but there's more love around that table than Lori's ever seen in her life. 

More thoughts: I grew up trailer living poor, but have NEVER begrudged a guest food or water. What the actual fuck is wrong with Lori?

@feministxtian, Fort Eustis, home of transportation! I loved living there! 

 

[feministxtian]

1 minute ago, TeddyBonkers said:

I will never have a million dollar house, or one with 6 bedrooms, but I LOVE to have people over. Especially at the holidays, when there are soldiers that can't go home, I open up my house. I make a metric shit-ton of food, gallons of artillery punch, and say come on in. It may not be the fanciest spread (my China is from Walmart) but there's more love around that table than Lori's ever seen in her life. 

More thoughts: I grew up trailer living poor, but have NEVER begrudged a guest food or water. What the actual fuck is wrong with Lori?

@feministxtian, Fort Eustis, home of transportation! I loved living there! 

 

I used to cook a spread for the young guys on the ship. Weekends, holidays...yup! Bunch o'sailors, my kids, dogs, cats, insanity!! The new Eustis commissary is beautiful. I remember the old one way in the back of the base where the frozen food department still had gravel floors! That would have been 1985-1986 or so. 

We had a dining room table that could be extended out to seat 12. Yup, every seat filled. I finally got smart and did things buffet style, put the food on the table, hand out plates and silverware and let them pig out. Once we get out of this dump I think we are going to do the same thing for the airmen at Nellis. If that doesn't happen, then we'll probably end up inviting some of the Vets from the US Vets housing in town, or some combination of a and b above. 

A metric shit-ton, huh? That's what? 10-20% larger than a regular shit-ton? I'm feeling it for next year, Thanksgiving and Christmas. God willing, this year we'll be househunting. 

 

[usmcmom]

@feministxtian;I am very sorry about the loss of your mother. 

My mother-in-law passed away three weeks ago. When she opted to discontinue dialysis (her cancer had spread so much that dialysis was not a benefit) we knew she had about a week left with us. I used that week to kind of nest, I think. I knew my kids and their spouses would be home sometime in the following two weeks. My huband and I also went out and loaded up on food and beverages - mainly things that could be frozen. I made a big pot of chili and stacked one counter with everyone's favorite beverages. That prep work served as a great distraction for us. Turns out, we REALLY had plenty of food because three separate families brought meals while our kids were home. It was so nice to have a wide variety of food and plenty of it. People could eat at different times or as a group (or both).  The first night we were all together we ate my friend's spaghetti dinner like we had not seen food in weeks. My fifteen-year-old granddaughter ate every meal in "her room" and it was Subway every time.   I didn't care. We were all doing what we needed to do to get through those few days.  

Even in our poorest days, I cannot imagine being resentful of what a guest used or ate while in my home.  Funny how we hateful FJ members are more generous than Lori, the godliest woman of all Godly women EVER!  

[feministxtian]

@usmcmom Yeah, mom's funeral was a blast...NOT! The kids and I did the funeral Mass. Somewhere I have a picture of #1 son in his class A uniform...I even invited all the shitty people who criticized me for 7 fucking years about how I took care of her but never lifted a fucking finger to help. 

We hit the commissary the day she died. After they took her body away, hospice took care of coordinating pick up of all the equipment. We were told that getting out of the house while they did all that was a smart thing to do, so we did. I ended up getting rip roaring drunk that night...the first night in 7 years that I could enjoy my evening. I called all the out of town relatives and kids and started coordinating airport pickups, etc. My #1 son was flown out by the Army...all I had to do was go pick him up at the Navy Base (that's where the Space A terminal was). Once he got home it got easier...I had the boys to go to pick up people, they flew into 2 different airports. There was 1 dinky airport by my house and the bigger one near the Naval Base. 

I too am sorry to hear of your MIL. Deaths, hospice, end of life stuff and funerals suck!

[usmcmom]

24 minutes ago, feministxtian said:

@usmcmom Yeah, mom's funeral was a blast...NOT! The kids and I did the funeral Mass. Somewhere I have a picture of #1 son in his class A uniform...I even invited all the shitty people who criticized me for 7 fucking years about how I took care of her but never lifted a fucking finger to help. 

We hit the commissary the day she died. After they took her body away, hospice took care of coordinating pick up of all the equipment. We were told that getting out of the house while they did all that was a smart thing to do, so we did. I ended up getting rip roaring drunk that night...the first night in 7 years that I could enjoy my evening. I called all the out of town relatives and kids and started coordinating airport pickups, etc. My #1 son was flown out by the Army...all I had to do was go pick him up at the Navy Base (that's where the Space A terminal was). Once he got home it got easier...I had the boys to go to pick up people, they flew into 2 different airports. There was 1 dinky airport by my house and the bigger one near the Naval Base. 

I too am sorry to hear of your MIL. Deaths, hospice, end of life stuff and funerals suck!

I know what you mean - it all sucks. I hate the business of death. Funeral homes and all their "services" make me sick. Our kids are the only grandkids that live away (they are each in a different state than us) My husband's siblings could not understand that he wanted to be with his children during this time. Sure, they had each been home for a visit while their grandma was still strong enough to enjoy it; but they could not be here for the entire year of illness. So after the funeral and dinner, we just wanted to be home with our own little family and his sister kind of got ticked off. I just said "Look. You and (other brother) have had your children with you throughout this whole illness. We have not. He wants and needs to be with his kids." ANNNNNDDDD, my husband had exhausted himself as his mother's main caregiver so I was not feeling at all generous to those who were complaining. Also, his brother started whining about the will two days after the funeral.  Since my husband is the executor he accused him of controlling the money and trying to cheat his own siblings.  It's all so disgusting.  

Oh - now his stepfather is getting cancer treatments. We were literally at the oncologist with him the morning of mother-in-law's funeral. My husband is in fear of losing his job (having taken so much time off to help his mom) so he has had to make lots of other arrangements to help his step dad. He feels like he is abandoning him. It is horrible. This year has been hell and the battle continues. 

Sorry for the massive vent. 

Edited to remove double post. 

[feministxtian]

@usmcmom honey, rant away. I'm a member of the been there, done that club. By the time the mother died, I had quit working full time and was doing the freelance thing. I couldn't balance a sick husband and a sick mother and a pain in the ass grown son who was being a total asshole AND a full time job. I think that's why we packed up and moved to Arizona later that year...just needed a clean slate. My mental health took a dive by then...and I'm still dealing with it. Too much shit at one time. What coping skills I had are now long gone, never to return. 

It's so hard to deal with all that crap. Fortunately I didn't have to deal with siblings or a will. 

[EowynW]

You women who have cared for people who on their way to the grave are so amazingly strong. I love you all.

 

I did it once (grandparent) and it was the hardest thing I've ever done. I can't imagine doing it for a parent. 

[louisa05]

@feministxtian--I'm betting I'll never work full time again after the three years of caregiving. I lost the motivation to kill myself for a job or devote my life to a damn school for ten months a year. And I have no other skills

I didn't expect it to change everything the way it did. Halfway through I would have told you that when it ended, I'd finish my disrupted masters program and look for a job. Now I don't even want that.

[feministxtian]

2 hours ago, louisa05 said:

@feministxtian--I'm betting I'll never work full time again after the three years of caregiving. I lost the motivation to kill myself for a job or devote my life to a damn school for ten months a year. And I have no other skills

I didn't expect it to change everything the way it did. Halfway through I would have told you that when it ended, I'd finish my disrupted masters program and look for a job. Now I don't even want that.

I almost finished my bachelor's, dropped out of the master's program and have had a hard time holding down a full time job since then. In the space of about a year, I had to decide to let both my mother and my aunt (who was more of a mother to me) die because further medical intervention was futile, move across the country, AND see my husband go through a risky surgery that would either cure him or kill him, then deal with the aftermath of that and HIS issues (depression, suicide attempts, etc). My head is FRIED but good. I have official, as in psychiatrist, diagnoses of depression, anxiety and PTSD. Now...5 years later, I get in this goddamn car accident where my neck and lower back hurt or ache 24/7. Been through 2 rounds of steroid and nerve block injections and well...they didn't work worth a damn. I'm going to talk to the attorney that's handling my car accident case about filing for SSDI...Physically, i don't think I could ever hold down a job again. 

I've lost motivation in terms of a career, but I hate not making money...that's my biggest motivation for the SSDI...have a little of my own money. 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

Caught this last night ..it was gone in 10 mins. Wonder which follower? Very interesting! Can't even volunteer. And Lori must agree with the follower to have deleted it. 

[Koala]

Can I try?

-There are no verses that speak about a woman blogging, mentoring via the internet, or spending a "majority of the day" "monitoring" people online.

-There are no verses that speak about a woman "dissipating her husband's substance" on hundreds of dollars worth of beauty products.

-There are no verses that speak about a woman dyeing her hair, in order to appear younger.  In fact, gray hair is considered a crown.

-There are no verses that speak about a woman leaving her home to vacation for several months each summer.

-There are no verses that speak of a woman storing up her wealth on earth, by investing in a house worth over a million dollars.

Funny how many arguments you can make from silence, huh Lori?

[AlwaysDiscerning]

13 hours ago, usmcmom said:

Is anybody else really tired of Lori starting her posts like she's looking for a fight? 

Each post begins with "Women hate me because..." "A woman named (whatever) disagreed with me..." "Why do women get so mad at me...?"

isn't a godly woman supposed to refrain from arguing?  I'm sorry...I mean - isn't a godly woman supposed to NOT argue. 

If her detractors meant nothing to her, she would just start in with the main idea of the post but she has to be so contentious. She has to prove to her followers that she is SOOOOOOOO persecuted and her way of doing that is by starting each post with *stomps foot* "Nobody Likes me!" 

She is so childish! 

And today begins with.....

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Some have accused me of supporting a patriarchal type system.

The post is a heavy defense of their family. Wondering why she feels the need to defend.

[Koala]

This is interesting:

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Our youngest daughter attended BIOLA one year but knew she didn’t want us to spend that much money on her going to a Christian college when she only wanted to be a wife and mother. Then she attended the local community college and finished up at the local university while living at home. Ken thought it important for her to have a degree.

If Ken thought it was important for his daughter to have a degree, then shouldn't Lori agree with him?  She's advised other women to adopt their husband's opinions.  Why shouldn't she do the same?

She definitely shouldn't spend so much time speaking against women getting degrees.  How is that being submissive to, and honoring "her head". <----God, I hate that term.  She's an easily deceived woman...what does she know, anyway?

[AlwaysDiscerning]

These are all gone now...

Annabelles's responses

 

[Koala]

Lies, lies, lies...

Lori today:

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Our youngest daughter attended BIOLA one year but knew she didn’t want us to spend that much money on her going to a Christian college when she only wanted to be a wife and mother. 

Lori 2012:

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She is getting her teaching credential. She would love to teach math at a Christian high school if that is where the Lord leads her. 

Teach math, she says??  I thought she only wanted to be a wife and mother???

Also, take note that she admits that Cassi attended a community college and a university.

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she attended the local community college and finished up at the local university 

Funny that, because in 2015 she said:

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I just don't see how Christians who think it's okay to send children to Universities match this with Scripture.

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No, thank you. There was no way we would send any of our children to an institution like this. Alyssa went to a Christian ballet company where they traveled all over spreading the Gospel. Ryan, Steven and Cassi all went to BIOLA; the Bible Institute of Los Angeles where most of their friends were raised in godly homes and there are godly professors and strict codes of conduct. 

She will lie, and not think twice about it...

[AlwaysDiscerning]

@KoalaGood stuff! I am going to find those screenshots and do something with them. She can lie like that since most people don't take the time to go through her old stuff. In blog land, everything older than a week is irrelevant. Her readers take each post at face value and don't compare it to other or even think to. They have blind trust in her in the way many do with politicians.

[Koala]

Hang on, and I will link you @AlwaysDiscerning 

2012:

Admits that Cassi went to both community college and university

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2012/02/perversion-of-universities.html

2015 (4th paragraph):

She would NEVER send her children to such an institution, and all 3 of her youngest children attended BIOLA

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2015/12/institutions-with-false-teachers-and.html

[Frog99]

I don’t have a desire for a million dollar home- just space to comfortably entertain. I wanted dedicated living and dining areas. All well and good until you realize it’s difficult for your aging parents to get into and maneuver through your home. 

I did some reading on her blog last night. I guess I’m just trying to understand why she’s so stuck on teaching women to be “KEEPERS AT HOME” only. I’m a clinical social worker and the dysfunction fascinated me (I know that is not very nice). 

I now hate the word “nourishing” and I hate the phrase “nourishing meals”. 

And my very rudimentary assessment is that she has a personality disorder. 

[usmcmom]

Who, Lori? Who has ACCUSED you of having a patriarchal family?!?  If such an accusation exists, post the comment like you usually do when you want to pick a fight. 

********

I don't think we've ever discussed patriarchy here, concerning the Alexander family   We all know they are not like The Maxwells or the Duggars in that regard. Heck, we know Ken and Lori don't even have a submissive marriage. We have discussed the possibility that a couple of her adult children depend on Ken for money and/or employment.  But not patriarchy, as far as I know.  

So, I just want to know where she read or heard that accusation. 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

I think the patriarchy reference came from one of the drive by commenters from the viral post. I remember something vaguely. Not that we will be able to find the comment now. But it sure bothered her to dedicate a whole post to it, despite how much she claims her naysayers don't bother her. 

[fundamentallyfearless]

Yeah no, Lori doesn’t even know what patriarchy LOOKS like. My FIL moved my husbands bedroom right across the hall from theirs when he was still living at home. The siblings all swap bedrooms once every few years and even tho my hubby was the oldest at home at that time, he didn’t get to choose where he slept. He was a full grown adult almost graduated from college. His other adult college siblings were “forbidden” from going to places with alcohol. His adult siblings were “forbidden” from coming to our wedding. THAT is what patriarchy looks like...

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

@fundamentallyfearless Your FIL sounds nutty.  Did your hubby's siblings come to your wedding anyway?  I assume they were all adults at the time, possibly not living at home? How did your hub "escape" from all this?

I used to know a fundie family who took the doors off the hinges on the children's rooms, even the closet doors.  The thought being if they're not doing anything wrong they don't need privacy.  Also no lock on the bathroom doors and the doors had to be partially open a little even if someone was in there. The mindset was that a closed door meant something wrong/sinful was going on.  Of course these were also people who stressed modesty. So I've always wondered how you get dressed in a room without a door without accidentally flashing anyone who walks by.  I guess everyone walked around staring at their shoes.

Does anyone else remember Lori saying that it was Ken who decided that Cassie should leave BIOLA because it was too expensive -- not that it was her decision?  Was the local university Cassie graduated from a state school or a private Christian college?  Private college is usually much more expensive that a state school.

Lori's hypocrisy knows no bounds.  She went to college (paid by her dad), Cassie went to college, her DILs went to college, her 2 sons went to college, her sons went on to medical/dental school.  All paid for by someone else.  In Lori's world every one of them should be staggering under massive college debt -- and yet they aren't .  And none of the women should have a degree because girls don't need no stinkin' college.

Just saying -- Lori mentions a 3rd son in her blog today. I assume she meant her 3rd child.  She needs to spend less time deleting and more time proofreading.

What the heck was with every man having hands in his pocket in the photo?  They all looked stupid, like they were playing pocket pool.

And.... being a shallow BEC here-- but Ryan has the same asshat jerk smile that Ken does, with the slight difference that Ken looks like he's leering and Ryan looks mean.

 

 

[Koala]

50 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Does anyone else remember Lori saying that it was Ken who decided that Cassie should leave BIOLA because it was too expensive -- not that it was her decision? 

I remember that as well.  

Here Lori is again, pretending all of her children graduated from BIOLA:

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I homeschooled them through junior high, then they went to a solidly biblically based high school. After that, they went to BIOLA {Bible institute of Los Angeles} where all the students have to minor in Bible. My children learned Bible from the time they were young until they graduated college. 

But if you look back to 2012:

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She went to a community college near home when she was nineteen years old.  It only cost $400 a semester which was much cheaper than Biola.  The first assignment given to her in her sociology class was a fifteen page study on gay bathroom sex. 

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Several years later when she was twenty one years old and grounded in her faith, she went to the local university.  One class discussed gay sex in prisons. On gay pride day, several of her classes spent the whole class time discussing gay lifestyles.  

And, then we're back to 2015 again:

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There was no way we would send any of our children to an institution like this. 

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Ryan, Steven and Cassi all went to BIOLA; the Bible Institute of Los Angeles where most of their friends were raised in godly homes and there are godly professors and strict codes of conduct. 

 

[usmcmom]

From Red Hair, Black Dress:

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Just saying -- Lori mentions a 3rd son in her blog today. I assume she meant her 3rd child.  She needs to spend less time deleting and more time proofreading.

I agree with you. I think Lori is referring to her children in birth order. A good writer would have said "Our third child, our son Steven, went to....." or something similar. 

Her writing skills are horrendous. God help us if she decides to write a second book.