Lori Alexander 30: Bad Speller, Worse Teacher, the Worst Mentor

[smittykins]

At my last apartment, I had a drug dealer on one side and a drunk on the other, and a meth lab down the hall at one point.(It was halfway decent when I moved there in 1991, then went steadily downhill until it was condemned in late 2014.  It’s since been fixed up and reopened, but I’ve heard it’s getting bad again.)

[lilwriter85]

2 hours ago, TeddyBonkers said:

@feministxtian, whenever Lori talks about "well I lived in a trailer" as proof that she could live frugally (HA!!!!), I remember back when Mr. Bonkers and I got married and lived in the absolute WORST apartment building in Fayettenam. (That's Fayetteville, North Carolina, right outside of Fort Bragg.) We were both enlisted at the time, but that's where we lived.

Of course, it's on the blacklist now, because of the murders.... Lori would have been running back to daddy so fast.

I often wonder what kind of trailer park she lived in. It could have been on those parks that are/were mostly occupied by retirees who might not have been poor.

[feministxtian]

Years ago I lived in Willoughby Naval housing...Oh my God...E-1 to E-6 housing...dilapidated, leaky, broken down...Maintenance was nil. Fortunately we only lived there for a year. THEN we moved up in the world, to a trailer park. It wasn't bad, it had security and a pool. BUT...the owner would get pissed towards the end of the month and shut the water off to the whole park to keep the bill down. Yeah, that sucked too. I've lived in my share of raggedy-ass apartments, nasty, leaky houses, etc. We're HOPING that the settlement from my accident will either pay the rent on a nicer place (absolutely gorgeous, contemporary, security with mountain and city views) or buy us a house. Either way I'm good...

[Loveday]

Lori's day has been made.

Reader in reply to today's post:

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I love love LOVE this! I've struggled with this in the past, and the only way to truly battle the satanic discontent is to soak your mind in God's Word! Hide it in your heart and your brain, listen to the great godly teachers OF OUR TIME (Lori Alexander, Nancy Campbell, Debi/MIcheal Pearl) and know your Bible!

If we thought she was insufferable before... 

[HoneyBunny]

Well, she may be a “great Godly teacher of our time” but she doesn’t know you shouldn’t use a tall bouquet of flowers as a dining table centerpiece when people are actually eating. They’ll all be trying to see around that garden.  

[usmcmom]

17 minutes ago, HoneyBunny said:

Well, she may be a “great Godly teacher of our time” but she doesn’t know you shouldn’t use a tall bouquet of flowers as a dining table centerpiece when people are actually eating. They’ll all be trying to see around that garden.  

 I thought the same thing when I saw that photo. I hope she moved them when the food was served. 

Her table did look very pretty, in my opinion. 

Side note: I love center pieces but was always just trying to toss something together for each season. Here in Illlinois, fresh flowers aren't always an option.  Last year I had a silk centerpiece made for my dining room table. I started with an Autumn themed one. I had the florist put it in long narrow box that looks like a big old cheese box. It sits very low to the table. Anyway, I had her make it so that the Autum one can be lifted out and I can replace it with the Christmas one I had her make. I hope to add a Spring one to the rotation this year. I love it - one container and, hopefully, several arrangements for it as I can add them. 

[HoneyBunny]

The table does look pretty. And her china looks a lot like ours (I’ve said before we’re nearly the same age). Except I didn’t get it as a wedding present, because we was po (channeling Sophia Petrillo here) and most of our friends were po, too. I bought it years later, using the money I earned from my unGodly job, at the imperfects room in a Royal Doulton store. 

[Hane]

2 minutes ago, HoneyBunny said:

The table does look pretty. And her china looks a lot like ours (I’ve said before we’re nearly the same age). Except I didn’t get it as a wedding present, because we was po (channeling Sophia Petrillo here) and most of our friends were po, too. I bought it years later, using the money I earned from my unGodly job, at the imperfects room in a Royal Doulton store. 

Fancy china may not be affordable for young folks starting out (or the friends/family who want to give them gifts), but sometimes you can get lucky at thrift stores like Savers or at tag sales. A relative gave me a big set of very pretty china I couldn't use (I already had my own), so I donated it to my church's tag sale in the hopes someone could take home something nice at an affordable price.

[TeddyBonkers]

The Mirror of True Womanhood, the book which she culled her entire post out of, is pretty darn Catholic. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I thought that Lori believed herself to be above the Pope. (And this may be nit-picky, but if you're going to say "written by thus and such", ESPECIALLY if it's the entire content of what you're putting out there, use the person's title. It's Rt. Rev. Monsignor Bernard O'Reilly.)

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Have you learned to be happy in your husband? Do you have a sweet, sunny, and cheerful manner?

Yes and yes. But let me take advice from a woman who was (and is) in a loveless marriage, is a passive aggressive bitch, and beats her children. Because clearly I'm the one doing something wrong.

[usmcmom]

3 hours ago, Hane said:

Fancy china may not be affordable for young folks starting out (or the friends/family who want to give them gifts), but sometimes you can get lucky at thrift stores like Savers or at tag sales. A relative gave me a big set of very pretty china I couldn't use (I already had my own), so I donated it to my church's tag sale in the hopes someone could take home something nice at an affordable price.

Back in my day...

it seems like most people only registered for china, silver and crystal; not a whole household worth of stuff. And by "most people" I mean NOT my family and NOT my husband's family. Only a very few distant relatives registered for those table settings. I remember being a little girl at a bridal shower and watching the bride-to-be open one tea cup. I was so confused. That is when my mother explained registries to me. 

My husband and I bought our own China when we'd been married a few years. A large department store near us was going to stop selling it so they marked it down like 70%. We were really excited but now are not sure we'd make the same purchase again. My daughter didn't even want it when I tried to give it to her. Maybe we'll pull it out and start using it every now and then. 

[Hane]

@usmcmom, my grandma and her mother were firm believers in using " nice things" frequently, because "Who's more important than my family?"

[usmcmom]

5 minutes ago, Hane said:

@usmcmom, my grandma and her mother were firm believers in using " nice things" frequently, because "Who's more important than my family?"

I like that. I just might pull some of it out of the boxes this week. Thanks. 

[delphinium65]

10 minutes ago, Hane said:

@usmcmom, my grandma and her mother were firm believers in using " nice things" frequently, because "Who's more important than my family?"

When my house burned down several years ago I had some things that never got used because we were keeping them for special occasions.  No more! If it get broken while in use, I figure it died in the line of duty. 

[molecule]

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Some of the last verses in the Bible warn against adding or taking away anything from God's Word. There are terrible consequences for doing this.

Yet she does it every time she insists that the Proverbs 31 woman took her children with her to consider a field and when she says that the commandment to teach women to be keepers at home means that they should be only keepers at home. Lori has a gigantic log in her own eye, and all she does is keep pointing out the specks in everyone else's eyes.

[feministxtian]

She's  accountable all right....and given her unbiblical stances on so many things, her ass is gonna be grass in the future. I need to find that whole quote from John MacArthur (I know y'all don't like him but it was very on point with Lori) about true and false Christians. Maybe I should send it to her...

Dishes: I have one set that was my mother's and one set that was my grandmother's. They'll all probably be donated soon b/c my kids don't want them. In reality, my kids really don't deserve ANYTHING when I bite the dust. So, I'll be donating gobs of shit probably when we get ready to move again (Please God make it soon)

[Sarah92]

Lori once again fails to notice the hypocrisy of saying that we shouldn't add the scriptures while  simultaneously adding commands that are not found in scripture. No where in scripture does it say a keeper of the home cannot work outside of the home. In fact, keeper of the home also hints at being a protector of the home. Are you being a protector of the home by dooming your family to live in poverty which has its own negative effects? In fact, looking at the story of the Widow in 2 Kings 4 she is commanded to GO and sell the oil to pay debts. Doesn't sound like she stayed home there. Lori, the hypocrisy is strong in this one and so it your inability to provide effective advice. 

[usmcmom]

Is anybody else really tired of Lori starting her posts like she's looking for a fight? 

Each post begins with "Women hate me because..." "A woman named (whatever) disagreed with me..." "Why do women get so mad at me...?"

isn't a godly woman supposed to refrain from arguing?  I'm sorry...I mean - isn't a godly woman supposed to NOT argue. 

If her detractors meant nothing to her, she would just start in with the main idea of the post but she has to be so contentious. She has to prove to her followers that she is SOOOOOOOO persecuted and her way of doing that is by starting each post with *stomps foot* "Nobody Likes me!" 

She is so childish! 

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

@Hane My grandmother was adamant about using your nice things and not saving them for "special occasions"  She would say -- "Who are you saving it for? Your husband's second wife?"  Mr Dress and I use our "good" china and silver all the time. If they get chipped or broken, that's life. 

Seriously, if everyone throughout history saved all their nice things for special events and never used them, the world would be completely buried in nice things.  

[Frog99]

I’m tired of her constant twisting of scripture and her misleading teaching. I worry about the women we don’t see commenting- the ones that may be struggling- who don’t have the knowledge or support system to help them understand true biblical instruction. I know many women who work outside the home, who are great wives and moms, great friends, great managers of the home. 

Why is she so bitter and hateful?

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Lori has a miserable loveless marriage that's merely a business arrangement.  She gives Ken 5 minutes and some lube a few times a week and pretends to submit to him.  In return. Ken supports her, pays for all her expensive organic food food and expensive make-up, and lets her spend all day ( and part of the night) monitoring (deleting) her blog comments, posting IGs, and making "You Tubes."

Ken and Lori have nothing in common, no shared interests, and no love between them. She has no one to blame but herself for all this.  She married a man she didn't love, didn't like and fought with constantly because she didn't want to work.  She hateful and bitter because she created a hateful bitter life for herself.

She spews that bile and bitterness on her blog because Lori cannot bear the idea that anyone else is happy, especially anyone who didn't follow her strict rules.  I think she's also highly annoyed that her sisters and her oldest daughter have happy marriages.

[Koala]

38 minutes ago, Frog99 said:

Why is she so bitter and hateful?

Right?  Her babbling on about her expensive china, made me remember this post on hospitality:

Lori Alexander:

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I use to be very selfish.  When we had guests, I was always concerned about the food they ate, the water they used, etc.  It was ugly.  

They live in a million dollar+, 6 bedroom house, and she was worried about how much food and water her guests consumed? Really?

As I said upthread, I could fit my house into Lori's house 3 times, and still have room to spare.  It's not uncommon for us to have guests over, and it has never once occurred to me to worry about how much they ate or drank.  In fact, we always go over the top when we have guests.  We want to offer the meals we make best, and we always cook enough that we're sure they'll be leftovers (we want to make sure our guests are comfortable helping themselves, and the best way to do that, is to have way more food than you need). 

I am going to go out on a limb here- I don't think Lori has changed at all.  I think she still resents every bite of food her guests put into their mouths, and every sip of water they take.  That kind of greed doesn't just disappear, and Lori's current behavior reveals that she's still the same person she always was.

 

[Frog99]

We have people over as well- something we enjoy. And we also make a point to have an over abundance of food because I want people to be comfortable and have more than enough. You could fit 2 1/2 of my houses in hers and we have essentially zero yard. We bought before we had kids- it wasn’t the smartest purchase in terms of layout but we still have people over. It means people have to climb over one another and you are bound to bump  into someone but it doesn’t seem to bother people. 

I dream of a space like hers (not that big but with an open layout) because I want our home to be the place to hang out for our kids and their friends, a place  of peace and comfort for our friends and others, a place where I can easily cook and bake to my heart’s content. 

[feministxtian]

Good grief...we're broke as hell, live in a 1100 sqft apartment. I never have kept track of what guests ate or drank (unless it was my son's selfish ass x-wife) We don't entertain here because of the shitty neighborhood and shitty neighbors (I'm actually sort of ashamed of where we live right now). HOPEFULLY we'll start entertaining again when we move. 

When my mom died...we knew that the kids would be home, bringing SOs, there'd be friends coming in, etc. so we went and blew about 600 bucks at the Ft. Eustis commissary. For those of you who aren't commissary shoppers, 600 bucks there FILLED the back of my trailblazer...from behind the front seats to the tailgate, and I had the extended version, 7 passenger one. I baked about 12 dozen of my children's favorite cookies and well..#1 son, who hadn't been home in quite awhile, ate most of them. I was happy he got his favorite cookies! I made ALL his favorite dishes, and always had food and drink out for everyone. I think we pretty much ran out of food inside of a week....

[Hisey]

I guess her comment confuses me. If she had guests over for dinner, what about their water usage would concern her? At most--a really thirsty person, even a person who took a shower at her house--could only use a few cents of water. Surely she can't begrudge someone 20 cents worth of water. And food? I assume she'd want people to eat what she made. Where is the problem there? 

[usmcmom]

I have a friend who does not like to have female guests spend the night because she is afraid they will use hairspray and mess up her bathroom walls. I am serious.  Our church once hosted a college chorus and they needed housing for the weekend. This friend specifically requested to host guys because of hairspray. 

I agree with @Koala  I don't think Lori has changed. That kind of attitude does not just disappear very easily and she does not seem like the kind who would WANT to change that part of herself. Also, she had to learn that resentment somewhere. I have a feeling Ken's low-income missionary family was much more generous than Lori's wealthy doctor household. 

My first thought was that she was judging the amount of food they ate and the choice they made as they served themselves (and she probably was) but...no...she admits to monitoring the amounts. 

When I was a teenager we were at a family Christmas party and the host (my cousin's husband) saw me fill my cup with ice from the freezer so I could have a soda. He actually said to me "Don't use so much ice next time."  I was so embarrassed and wanted to cry. My mother was livid when I told her about that. We never had much when I was growing up but she knew how to be a gracious hostess and make all guests feel honored.