Dillards 33: Now Including Samuel

[Quiver Full of Kittens]

32 minutes ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Joy & Austin have a congrats vid on DFO, in on my phone or I'd link.  I'm starting to think Jill had a major complication. A poster said they would update Saturday, don't know how she is or how true but it is weird to wait a week for no reason.  Ar hey giving Jill time to recover from surgery time to grieve loss of fertility?  Is Samuel sicker then they let on and they will know more then?  It's all very strange.  I really hope they are just trying to drum up attention rather than any real problems.

I'm beginning to wonder as well. As hard as the loss of fertility would be (if that is indeed the case) for Jill, it could easily be  spun by the Duggar PR machine as the Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away... He has chosen to end this season of life.

Publicity is their bread and butter. There's got to be a serious reason for the delay. 

[justoneoftwo]

8 minutes ago, Million Children For Jesus said:

I think they're holding out for People magazine. Derick's message on Instagram says, "Mom and baby Sam are doing well!....More photos soon on (website)" 

Is this an edited caption? It sounds different than what I recall reading on FJ before. 

I thought be had removed the doing well statement.  Definitely different from what I've seen on here before.

[singsingsing]

Rufus smiles upon this forum. May his antlers bless you abundantly. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

@singsingsing -that's almost exactly how many down-votes there are on their Youtube video. lol

[Antipatriarch]

I wonder what the record is for number of downvotes on a post...

[backyard sylph]

1 hour ago, Million Children For Jesus said:

Thank you for adding this line. As a person who has suffered from abuse, this means a lot. I'm not imaging that I was denied emotional space. It happened.

My sister will only participate in conversations she starts and controls so she can showcase her knowledge base and imply she knows more than you do because you're inherently stupid. If anyone tries to bring up a topic of interest that she can't dominate, she becomes irate, insults it, and changes the subject.

I make a point to always separate the general from the specific; also to never assume a general truth from a specific experience.

[PennySycamore]

@Fluffy14,  I don't think I've read about how a history of sexual abuse complicates pregnancy, labor and delivery, but I do know that it can really complicate efforts to breastfeed.  Some survivors cannot tolerate the thought of the baby at the breast at all nor can they tolerate the idea of pumping and bottle feeding the baby the expressed milk.  Some abuse survivors can pump, but not feed the baby directly at the breast.  Some mothers can breastfeed, but in a somewhat limited manner.  They tend not to breastfeed for comfort and are glad when the baby weans.  Some women don't have problems at all and, in fact, may find it healing to have their breasts used in an asexual manner.  It can depend a lot on if and how the abuser used her breasts in the molestation.  I'd think that abuse survivors might have problems with labor and delivery.

Can @singsingsing win the week for reputation given even if the votes were downvotes?  The down voting was epic!

[bananabread]

1 hour ago, Quiver Full of Kittens said:

I'm beginning to wonder as well. As hard as the loss of fertility would be (if that is indeed the case) for Jill, it could easily be  spun by the Duggar PR machine as the Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away... He has chosen to end this season of life.

Publicity is their bread and butter. There's got to be a serious reason for the delay. 

I agree, I think something is up.

Emergency hysterectomies are sometimes necessary after birth (c-section or otherwise), so that's a possibility. Especially if she had placenta accreta or a similar complication. But with all the adoption talk floating around the Duggars, I think it would be easy to spin that as "the Lord wants us to adopt needy children." (For PR purposes. I'm sure Jill and Derick would still be personally devastated.)

[justoneoftwo]

2 minutes ago, bananabread said:

I agree, I think something is up.

Emergency hysterectomies are sometimes necessary after birth (c-section or otherwise), so that's a possibility. Especially if she had placenta accreta or a similar complication. But with all the adoption talk floating around the Duggars, I think it would be easy to spin that as "the Lord wants us to adopt needy children." (For PR purposes. I'm sure Jill and Derick would still be personally devastated.)

For PR purposes it would probably be best for them to announce sooner rather than later, or do others disagree?

From within the cult, delaying announcements may indicate that they need to work on contentment, right?  Maybe I'm missing something.  If something is up I hope they are dealing with it as a family and not just trying to figure out the PR.  

[Fluffy14]

Maybe tubes tied? Maybe they sewed the uterus together but it would not hold a baby?  I can see this as a very tragic loss to come to terms with.  Especially with their mentality around birthing a million children and it being the woman's ONLY CALL for life. 

In their quiverfull mindset this would be utterly devastating . I don't think it would be easy to just spin another story right away for any of them. . This would be a shocker for all involved. It might just rock their world view on blessings and how they pertain to the relationship with God because we all know how screwed up that is.

That is interesting about the negative breast feeding concept....if I can remember right my therapist said sexual abuse victims have more trouble with birth. But mine was specifically related to a previous traumatic birth, not the sexual abuse. 

[singsingsing]

How common is it for something to go so catastrophically wrong during a c-section that the mother needs a hysterectomy, and/or her uterus is damaged to the point that she'll never be able to bear another child? It seems unlikely to me, but I'm extremely ignorant on the subject...

[Hmmm_idolatry]

5 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

How common is it for something to go so catastrophically wrong during a c-section that the mother needs a hysterectomy, and/or her uterus is damaged to the point that she'll never be able to bear another child? It seems unlikely to me, but I'm extremely ignorant on the subject...

I don't know, but I suspect that if something went wrong, the fact that she labored at home in ignorance and without proper medical care might play a role here. 

[Georgiana]

12 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

How common is it for something to go so catastrophically wrong during a c-section that the mother needs a hysterectomy, and/or her uterus is damaged to the point that she'll never be able to bear another child? It seems unlikely to me, but I'm extremely ignorant on the subject...

Not sure on the actual numbers, but it's not unheard of.  I've known two people that have had to have hysterectomies due to c sections: my friend's mother when I was a kid and one of my friends in her early 20s.  In both cases, they were after back to back c sections, which I believe increases the risk.  

A lot of it depends on how she healed (or if she healed) from Izzy.  If she didn't heal well from Izzy, the second c section is almost certain to be the final nail as it will only make things worse, not better.  

[SapphireSlytherin]

From my Google University School of Medicine degree:

Quote

The incidence of emergency peripartum hysterectomy ranged from 0.24 to 8.7 per 1000 deliveries. Emergency peripartum hysterectomy was found to be more common following cesarean section than vaginal deliveries. The predominant indication for emergency peripartum hysterectomy was abnormal placentation (placenta previa/accreta) which was noted in 45 to 73.3%, uterine atony in 20.6 to 43% and uterine rupture in 11.4 to 45.5 %. The risk factors included previous cesarean section, scarred uterus, multiparity, older age group. The maternal morbidity ranged from 26.5 to 31.5% and the mortality from 0 to 12.5% with a mean of 4.8%. The decision of performing total or subtotal hysterectomy was influenced by the patient's condition.

 

[RosyDaisy]

Yep, and if you want specifics, this chart is awesome. I use it all the time to try to remember if "Melissa" is my third cousin/once removed or my second cousin/twice removed... lol
http://www.4familytrees.com/relationship matrix.htm 

There are also phone/tablet apps for this. Just search for genealogy apps.

[Dandruff]

I know a woman who had placenta previa with her first pregnancy, scheduled an early c-section (she was getting good prenatal care), and still nearly bled to death and needed a hysterectomy.

Hope Jill wasn't really laboring for 40 hours.  And it seems fishy to me that they're not providing at least slightly encouraging updates, since I doubt it would affect magazine sales.

I'm now imagining a PR team busy at work while Jill and her family/friends fervently pray for a refurbished uterus.

[Playagirl]

19 hours ago, SayWhat said:

This winter,  I stored my roadster and mice built a nest inside the vents, it was gross .  This spring when I cleaned it out the nest looked better than your hair ! " 

Try dryer sheets next winter, @SayWhat.  Just stick them in every nook and cranny of your car before putting it away. Works like a charm to keep the mice away.

[nickelodeon]

Eh, I'm sure they're just fine and dandy, and they've sold exclusive rights to the first family pic to People but have to wait an issue or two before that they can have a cover. Hell of a better way to fund your fake mission than begging on the internet.

[Snarkle Motion]

I would really feel bad for Jill if she had a hysterectomy. That is essentially the end of her supposed "purpose" in life and likely will be interpreted as a message that god wants her on the mission field - which she clearly hates.

[Million Children For Jesus]

 

9 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

Snipped

..... because the Dills don't share as much anymore and what they do share is heavily focused on family and SCA. So it's possible he's drifted from his friends, but it's also possible they're still friends and the Dills just don't mention it for some reason.

You're an amazing wealth of information. 

It makes sense to me that Derick would still be close to his two non-family groomsmen, even if we don't see it because they don't see each other or talk that often. If he is like the runners I know, he has that personality type where friendships don't need constant maintenance, and you can pick up right where you left off no matter how long it has been since you've seen each other. (That's me. I was a runner.) It can be really easy to forget to see your friends when you have that personality type and get busy with marriage and kids, but it is oh-so-important, so hopefully Derick and Jill make the effort to forge friendships outside of marriage. I'd be interested in seeing more of that on the show. (Second choice after show being cancelled.)

Incidentally, a lot of the runners I know also play instruments, which makes sense because they're comfortable being alone for extended periods of time to practice. Playing with a band forces them to socialize semi regularly. Derick plays the trumpet, so maybe we'll see him in some type of Dixieland or mariachi (lol, just kidding) band. I'm not holding my breath for ska or American folk rock, even though I have a Fundie pipe dream of the Dullards moving to Austin and becoming crunchy hippie conservative Christians. Back in the real world, I'll be ecstatic if they leave the TTH and make it to Tulsa.

Anyway, I anticipate seeing a lot more group socializing from Jinger and The Babe, than from the Dullards. Not a slight on Derick at all, just personality differences. Neither is better nor worse than the other.

Josh though, I think there are deeper, more troubling issues why he doesn't seem to have any real friends.

[Baaaaaabe]

49 minutes ago, Dandruff said:

fervently pray for a refurbished uterus.

I have quite a few body parts that suck and am undergoing OT and PT atm. The OT made a joke about my arms falling off (as an indicator of how difficult the session would be). I said it was fine with me as long as they gave me better ones after.   I'll take some refurbished joints, a stomach and a bladder, thanks 

[Greendoor]

20 hours ago, bella8050 said:

Please can "joining the herd" be incorporated into a future thread title? 

Sure - let's use it when M5 is born.

 

[HarleyQuinn]

It would be funny of they were waiting for a people spread tomorrow, thinking it will get them a ton of attention, only they'll be completely overshadowed because the Emmy noms are tomorrow.

[adidas]

Maybe? ... maaaaaayyyyybe ... Anna is due  very soon and they're waiting for M5 to arrive to really cash in with the People cover.

Nah. Probably not. But I have this habit where I have to say whatever thought comes into my head. 

[FeministFunPolice]

2 hours ago, Fluffy14 said:

Maybe tubes tied? Maybe they sewed the uterus together but it would not hold a baby?  I can see this as a very tragic loss to come to terms with.  Especially with their mentality around birthing a million children and it being the woman's ONLY CALL for life. 

In their quiverfull mindset this would be utterly devastating . I don't think it would be easy to just spin another story right away for any of them. . This would be a shocker for all involved. It might just rock their world view on blessings and how they pertain to the relationship with God because we all know how screwed up that is.

That is interesting about the negative breast feeding concept....if I can remember right my therapist said sexual abuse victims have more trouble with birth. But mine was specifically related to a previous traumatic birth, not the sexual abuse. 

I think even if the doctors told her not to get pregnant again they would still avoid birth control. Gotta leave it up to God. That's the thing that really scares/saddens me, they are willing to risk death for a very dodgy theological position.