Lori Alexander 18: Taking Pictures in the Closet

[Red Jumper]

So that must be the commanding men Lori's dreaming of: The wife is not submissive because of him but because of a blog of a female  stranger. 

Is Lori so stupid or are those readers so stupid to not see how down-putting that is? Or both?

[usmcmom]

My first thought on Jeff's post was that he is jealous of his own son. "She won't iron MY cloths but she'll iron HIS!!"  It seems really creepy and disgusting. 

[Koala]

Okay, I think I'm lost now.

Lori:

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If women are not to teach men because they are more easily deceived, why should they teach women? There are so many women preachers/teachers/authors that are leading women astray by their false teachings.

Is she saying that other women shouldn't teach because they are more easily led astray, or is she saying that she herself needs to shut down her teaching  blog because she could be deceived, thus leading others astray?

I wonder if Lori ever notices the mental gymnastics she has to do, to keep up with her own "teaching".  Of course she doesn't teach, because she's a woman, who could easily lead others astray.  Except she does.  Because God calls her to teach younger women.  Except, why should women teach other women if they can't teach men?  

See how quickly you wind up going in circles?

Reader:

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Question for consideration: when does a boy become a man? And does this apply to mother and man-son? I, personally, believe that a boy becomes a spiritual man at confirmation (I am Lutheran, so we still have that), and that I am not longer to be in spiritual authority over him. Character building will be handed over to their father at that point.

So at approx. 14 years old (when her son very much needs both of his parents), she plans to throw her hands up and declare him a man?  

 Lady, please.  You will absolutely be in authority over him.  You just may be crazy enough to abdicate that responsibility, but that won't be because he's a man, it'll be because you're crazy.

Do you people see the craziness these people get up to when they follow their nutty ideas out to their natural conclusion?  Now mothers can't be mothers because they don't want to have authority over men (even if those "men" are their minor children).

Dear lord, help us all.  

[louisa05]

Okay, I think I'm lost now.

Lori:

If women are not to teach men because they are more easily deceived, why should they teach women? There are so many women preachers/teachers/authors that are leading women astray by their false teachings.

Is she saying that other women shouldn't teach because they are more easily led astray, or is she saying that she herself needs to shut down her teaching  blog because she could be deceived, thus leading others astray?
I wonder if Lori ever notices the mental gymnastics she has to do, to keep up with her own "teaching".  Of course she doesn't teach, because she's a woman, who could easily lead others astray.  Except she does.  Because God calls her to teach younger women.  Except, why should women teach other women if they can't teach men?  

See how quickly you wind up going in circles?

Reader:

Question for consideration: when does a boy become a man? And does this apply to mother and man-son? I, personally, believe that a boy becomes a spiritual man at confirmation (I am Lutheran, so we still have that), and that I am not longer to be in spiritual authority over him. Character building will be handed over to their father at that point.

So at approx. 14 years old (when her son very much needs both of his parents), she plans to throw her hands up and declare him a man?  
 Lady, please.  You will absolutely be in authority over him.  You just may be crazy enough to abdicate that responsibility, but that won't be because he's a man, it'll be because you're crazy.

Do you people see the craziness these people get up to when they follow their nutty ideas out to their natural conclusion?  Now mothers can't be mothers because they don't want to have authority over men (even if those "men" are their minor children).
Dear lord, help us all.  


When I taught in Christian school, more than one father informed me that because I am a woman I had no authority over his teenage son in my classroom. Including not just discipline but even giving and grading assignments.

[RosyDaisy]

The way I was raised, a mother always has authority over a minor child. She brought the child into this world, therefore she is responsible for every aspect of his/her upbringing.

[polecat]

My 14 yo son has 3" on me, and you'd best believe I'm still an authority in his life. And he knows it.

But seriously, these women are putting themselves lower than children, teens, maybe, but still children who desperately need and *want* the guidance of their parents. Disgraceful. Abdicate your responsibilities as a parent if you want, but that will absolutely come back to bite you in the ass. Sadly, it's going to hurt their kids far more.

[foreign fundie]

35 minutes ago, louisa05 said:

When I taught in Christian school, more than one father informed me that because I am a woman I had no authority over his teenage son in my classroom. Including not just discipline but even giving and grading assignments.

That is just weird. And I thought I'd heard it all by now. How the hefalump are you supposed to teach teenagers without authority? Why even employ female teachers or have a mixed school? If these boys are taught not to accept any female authorities, how can they ever function in a society where there are female policemen, female employers and senior co- workers, even Sarah Palin? What did you answer these dads? Go colonize Mars before any of us wimminz get there? 

[Coy Koi]

46 minutes ago, louisa05 said:

When I taught in Christian school, more than one father informed me that because I am a woman I had no authority over his teenage son in my classroom. Including not just discipline but even giving and grading assignments.

What on earth did you say to that?

[usmcmom]

Several years ago, there were about four boys at our church who decided to be baptized. They were all eight and nine years old. The next Sunday, an elder entered their Sunday school class and asked their female teacher to leave because these fourth graders were, apparently, now men and she could not teach them. 

I actually spoke to the elders and said "If we women cannot teach these boys because they are suddenly men; then they should be able to teach us. We all know that is not possible."  They had no reply to that. 

That was the beginning of the end for us at that congregation. 

NOWHERE in the Bible does it say a boy becomes a man at the point of baptism. 

My son is almost 26. While I certainly no longer have authority over him, he absolutely respects me and seeks my advice on many issues. I may have to stand on my tippy toes to kiss his face but he still knows his place on the family totem pole and it is below BOTH of his parents. 

[louisa05]

What on earth did you say to that?

I told one he shouldn't have the kid in any school then.

The most adamant one ended up taking his kids out when we got a female principal.

For all it's many faults, that school didn't have an issue with women leading or working. Probably because it was originally owned by a charismatic church where women were allowed in ministry.

[Koala]

She is so damn argumentative.  A reader points out that date nights can be free, and positive for the marriage:

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I think the mentality behind prioritizing date nights is to find time to talk and be together to build friendship within marriage. Date night can be free (a picnic, a walk, game night, whatever) or after the kids go to bed at home. It's about making time for one another to connect. I don't understand what it has to do with submission or sin for that matter, or why it would have to cause a burden.

Lori:

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 It's NOT the key to a strong marriage as many marriage "experts" would have us believe. The Bible says nothing about having date nights but it does have a lot to say about wives being help meets, submissive, loving, and pleasing their husbands.

The Bible says nothing about having a blog either, but that hasn't stopped Lori.

Now they're all tripping over themselves seeing who went the longest without a date night. Because we allllll know how mad the Almighty gets when a husband and wife go out for dinner.  

[Hisey]

I'm guessing Lori and Ken do not have date nights. Wow, could this marriage get any worse?

[usmcmom]

It seems like Lori has mentioned watching her grandkids while their parents had a night out. This was in one of her YouTube videos, I think. God help me if I have to go through those to confirm it, so...never mind.  Still, I'm sure date nights are fine for her family but sinful for everybody else.  

Lori's black and white thinking is so annoying. I doubt anybody believes that date night is THE KEY to a good marriage; but it certainly isn't sinful or even damaging to a marriage. 

[louisa05]

It seems like Lori has mentioned watching her grandkids while their parents had a night out. This was in one of her YouTube videos, I think. God help me if I have to go through those to confirm it, so...never mind.  Still, I'm sure date nights are fine for her family but sinful for everybody else.  
Lori's black and white thinking is so annoying. I doubt anybody believes that date night is THE KEY to a good marriage; but it certainly isn't sinful or even damaging to a marriage. 

And I highly doubt any marriage counselors see it as the solution for every problem in any marriage.

Unlike Lori, they would understand that every couple is different and there is no one size fits all prescription for a successful marriage.

[onemama]

One commenter on facebook says:

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The idea that women should not speak at all in the body of believers is not only entirely missing the point, but obviously not something you believe.. or you wouldn't be speaking.

Four hours and it's still there.

Another one asks:

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Who, at church, should be teaching the children? It seems that usually this is women, but the Bible tells us to "teach the younger women...".

And another commenter replies:

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 Children should be taught by the pastor/elders during the service and Sunday School (if there is one) just like the adults are. "Children's church" is not biblical; children should not be separated to a classroom to hear "age-appropriate" teaching.

Nice. That will teach the kids that Church is the place you go to sit and be bored to distraction.  I'd like to have that woman sit through a 45-60 minute lecture full of big words she doesn't understand, every single Sunday. I bet she'd be dreading it and popping preemptive painkillers for those headaches. 

[Koala]

I remember her saying that her son and dil have weekly date nights.  In looking or that comment, I came across this gem from Ken:

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One early morning Lori hopped back in bed and said to me, “I was just listening to this couple on Focus on the Family and they said it only takes five minutes a day to please your man. I can give you five minutes so long as it is in the mornings.” Wow!  That was music to my ears.

 Lori doesn't need to be giving marriage advice.  Ever.  Period. 

Their marriage is just gross.

[onemama]

From her latest submission post on facebook:

A guy says:

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Marriage is not really easy. 
A woman has to submit, yes! 
But, we men also need some checks by our woman. 
A wife should know the boundaries. While she is being a great, beautiful & submissive wife, she should also know when the husband is crossing the line & say NO! 

Some of we (less knowledgeable) men take these things for granted when the wife is playing her card well & being that loyal, submissive & beautiful woman. 

Some ladies that are not that knowledgeable enough do the same. When their man is that God fearing, home guy, they tend to lose their head & start putting up behaviors that will make the cool guy, go crazy. They tend to expect the guy to now submit to them. 

This is where I need "The Transformed Wife" to speak about. 
How can such situations be handled? 
I thought that if the man is a good, home guy, not scared to do right, the wife will be happy, & treat him sweetly. Must a guy treat his wife with some iron-hand, so that she will be a little scared & submit?

And this is what a mother has to say about her daughter

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I think the only advice I have given my eldest daughter on the subject of finding a husband was that she should marry a man she is happy to be obedient to. Is that because I am a misogynist? No. It's because I love her unconditionally and want her to be happy, just as our Heavenly Father wishes us the same. She is engaged now but I don't know if my words ever meant anything to her?

This sounds a bit like Lori

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 I read one "Godly" woman who just loves to share her heart with the world and it all seems so wonderful and perfect yet, her husband has said in a public forum, that she doesn't submit to him. The shame! It's so sad when I read her and when she does talk about submission, I wonder if she does not see the own beam in her eye. She loves to say how she submits, but her own husband has admitted she doesn't. We all need to pray for her, that God touches her

 

[EowynW]

1 minute ago, Koala said:

I remember her saying that her son and dil have weekly date nights.  In looking or that comment, I came across this gem from Ken:

 Lori doesn't need to be giving marriage advice.  Ever.  Period. 

Their marriage is just gross.

W. T. F. 

 

To both their marriage and FOTF advice. What the heck?!

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Does that mean it's really 5 minutes and some lube, not 10 minutes?

So . . . That's it -- Ken get 5 minutes?  Doesn't really seem worth it -- Lori lying there like a dead mackerel.  Ken might just as well take 5 minutes in the shower alone. At least he'd be with a willing participant - himself.

Not to be TMI, but I absolutely believe Lori has no sex drive, probably never has. Why yes you can give your husband sex Every. Single. Day. if it's only 10 minutes of mechanical sex and you feel nothing.

But isn't that really the definition of a sexless marriage? Unless what Lori is telling us is that godly. Christian men don't want responsive, mutually pleasurable sex with their wives.  They just want to get on, get off, and then jump in the shower?

Is Lori telling us that only sluts enjoy sex? 

Clutching my pearls because I just might be a slut then.

[AlwaysDiscerning]

I wonder what Lori would think of this:

https://biblicalgenderroles.com/2017/05/02/a-biblical-guide-to-seducing-your-husband/

Its talks about how women are to ravish men with their pomengranite juices and they are to ravish their men by swallowing their apple tree. 

And then this from Larry (BGR):

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If you have not figured out by now, the Song of Solomon is a very erotic book. It speaks of sexuality between a husband and wife in very free terms as God meant it to be.  It has constant allusions to the bodily fluids that are exchanged between a man and woman.  Again, here as in other passages throughout the Song of Solomon it compares a woman’s vaginal secretions to myrrh.  Why are the woman’s hands literally dripping with her own vaginal secretions? It is because she was touching her own vagina moving the fluids in and out around her vulva.

This literally has the picture of a woman who is completely comfortable with her own body and she is opening herself to her beloved – spreading her legs and then using her fingers to open her vagina bringing its fluids out for her husband to see.

 

Naturally, Trey comments on all this!

[Letgo]

14 minutes ago, Koala said:

One early morning Lori hopped back in bed and said to me, “I was just listening to this couple on Focus on the Family and they said it only takes five minutes a day to please your man. I can give you five minutes so long as it is in the mornings.” Wow!  That was music to my ears.

Seriously? Five minutes? She can spare him that much time-as long as it is in the morning? Isn't this Lori making the decision? How is this submission, if SHE decides that she is going to please her man, when, for how long, and only agrees if it suits her time frame? I thought she was supposed to be saying yes when he approached her? After all, men are the ones who have needs. Plus, he is her headship. Can't see much leading or submitting taking place when she is the one who decides time, place, and duration.

Does Lori have any real interest in her husband at all, sexually? Any needs or desires of her own? Five minutes is not going to cut it. This is nuts.

[onemama]

5 minutes ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

Its talks about how women are to ravish men with their pomengranite juices and they are to ravish their men by swallowing their apple tree. 

Too much for chaste Lori. 

[polecat]

1 hour ago, Koala said:

 It's NOT the key to a strong marriage as many marriage "experts" would have us believe. The Bible says nothing about having date nights but it does have a lot to say about wives being help meets, submissive, loving, and pleasing their husbands.

 

 

Funny story -- I'm a total homebody. My husband, otoh, lives for date night. If he could, he'd have date night at least a couple times a week. Now that our kids are in school, we go out during the day to do things (since he works shifts) -- walk in the park, visit a museum, little things.

Wonder what Lori has to say about that? In my case, date night (or day, as it were) is alllllll about pleasing and loving my husband. I enjoy it, too, but I'm just as happy at home puttering around in the garden or whatever.

 

ETA -- nevermind. I know what she'd say. EXCEPTION! DISTRACTION! WHORE OF BABYLON! She needs a new line.

[onemama]

2 minutes ago, polecat said:

. EXCEPTION! DISTRACTION! WHORE OF BABYLON!

You forgot JEZEBEL!

[AlwaysDiscerning]

Melissa:

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Ok, so, what are the peramiters for submission? Where does submitting stop and doormat begin? I've asked these types of questions frequently throughout my adult life and never gotten a satisfactory response. Even in equally yoked relationships, sometimes the submissive wife is taken for granted. Which leads to resentment. I'm not trolling you, I'm seeking understanding.

Lori:

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We don't need to concern ourselves with where the submitting stop and the doormat begins because Jesus told us that the greatest of all is the servant of all. We need to serve, honor, and obey our husbands since we will only give an account for our behavior and not his.

Then another reader posts a link and Melissa responds:

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This is exactly the type of guidance I was seeking. I was not looking for a " because I said so" response. I appreciate you providing the link as well.

Yup, take that Lori. Another reader actually provides something helpful, not the godly mentor and her canned responses.